N/A Wow, it's been a (ridiculously) long time. Firstly, so sorry for the hiatus. Secondly, life sometimes decides to take you down different paths, sometimes things don't work out the way you want them to and sometimes you just have to adapt to those changes. A lot of things have changed since the last time I updated; some for the good; some for the bad, but I'm sorting stuff out and I hope you can all understand that this story maybe taking a backseat for a little bit. But I will update whenever I can! Hope you're all well.

Enjoy, my little story buddies. xxx

"Good morning," Quinn said cheerfully as she walked past Rachel at the dining table, before scooting onto the bench.

"Someone's happy," Rachel smiled, moving her school bag so that Quinn could sit comfortably.

It was now Thursday morning and for no reason whatsoever, Stoneson seemed happy this morning. Everyone was just getting on with their day, going to work, school or the job centre for some of them. Yesterday morning, Quinn had mentioned to the brunette that she had listened in on their tuition time and felt happy that Rachel was finally on the wall. The brunette took the fun out of the fact that Quinn had spied on them, but also agreed that she, too, was very happy she was on the wall.

Rachel had spent the afternoon after school yesterday hanging out with Dave on the field. It was really nice to catch up and they had fun listening to some songs on Dave's iPod. He had mentioned that he would be meeting someone called Ashley later that night, so couldn't stay long. She was going to ask him if it was his girlfriend but didn't want to push, as he seemed kind of shy about the subject.

Quinn and Rachel hadn't really talked more about their situations and issues, but a suitable time hadn't arisen. They hadn't driven home together because Rachel was with Dave, they couldn't really speak at dinner as Eddie was telling them all about the fact that he had been promoted to Assistant Manager at his shop and they felt it was fair to give him all the time he wanted to boast about it and they hadn't slept in each other's room because Quinn was still reluctant to let Rachel in hers and Rachel hadn't knocked on Quinn's door at 1am needing someone with her. Even though they hadn't talked about things, they were still finding it fun to just be together and Rachel even managed to eat lunch in the cafeteria again, with the help of a certain blonde holding her hand in the lunch queue, but they didn't mention about that.

"The weather's nice, my lesson plan doesn't seem too bad today and I also just had a really awesome phone call," the blonde explained, reaching into the middle of the table to grab some toast.

"The weather is nice, my lesson's aren't too bad as well and please tell me more about the phone call," Rachel grinned jokingly, sipping her orange juice.

"Okay, no need to be sarcastic," Quinn laughed, nibbling her toast.

"No seriously, who phoned?" the brunette smiled, wiping her mouth with her napkin.

"My boss," Quinn said, before continuing, "he said you can work the same hours as me and get the same amount of pay as me!"

Rachel choked on some cereal.

"Seriously?" the brunette grinned; she had never had a job before.

"Yep! On one condition though," Quinn's smile faltered a little bit.

Rachel looked at her with interest and a cocked eyebrow.

"What condition?" she asked.

"We get a fifteen minute break because we will be working five hours, so he says that fifteen minutes is ample time to do some cleaning, so the condition is, well, we have to…"

Quinn was cringing just thinking about it.

"Please get to the point, you're making me think we're going to have to do something really bad," Rachel said, crinkling her nose.

"We have to clean the customer toilets," Quinn said as she fake-gagged, "there are only two, one for men and one for women, but they're… seriously gross."

Rachel burst out laughing. Cleaning toilets? That was hardly a bad condition. She had done much worse; imagine cleaning out the boy's toilets and showers in a care home when you were only ten? That's gross.

"Why are you laughing? It's horrible!" Quinn said as she sulked.

"It's not that bad Quinn, I'm sure we can manage," Rachel giggled.

"Why do we even need toilets? We're hardly a big store," Quinn rolled her eyes.

"We can get through this, we can do this together, I'm here for you Quinn," the brunette said as she sat up straight and nodded as if they were going into battle.

"Oh shut up," Quinn swatted Rachel's arm, as she laughed.

Okay, maybe she did overreact a bit; but it's so gross!

"Sausages!" Amber said loudly as she planted down a tray full of sizzling sausages in the middle of the table.

Everyone took a sausage and tucked in; Ella even sneaking two from the pile.

Rachel had to admit, they did kind of look good. There were two different kinds of sausages in there, so she wondered if they were different types.

"Amber?" Rachel said shyly.

Ever since that night with the shouting, Amber and Justin hadn't said a word to each other. Rachel tried not to speak to the girl if she could help it but she was interested in the sausages and Amber had got them from Sally, so the girl should know the answer.

"What?" the darker girl replied, squirting a load of tomato sauce on her sausages.

"Um, are some of those sausages vegetarian ones? Some of them look a different colour," Rachel asked, as she leant closer to look at the tray.

"Oh yeah, sure, some of them are. I think it's the darker ones," Amber said, smiling at Rachel.

The brunette wasn't sure why Amber was being so nice but she thought she would have to give her the benefit of the doubt. Leaning over Toby, she stabbed one with her fork and placed it on her plate.

Cutting a piece off, she looked at the inside; it did look like the vegetarian ones you can get and it smelt nice, so shrugging her shoulders, she placed the hot sausage into her mouth.

Quinn was studying Amber. She had never liked the girl. As Rachel hummed her approval of the taste, the blonde saw that Amber was starting to laugh to herself.

That was when Quinn knew. They weren't any vegetarian sausages on that tray after all.

"Hey shorty?!" Amber shouted from the other end of table.

Rachel assumed it was her nickname, so she turned her head in the girl's direction.

"Enjoying your sausage?!" Amber grinned, winking at Rachel.

The brunette nodded her answer but then immediately went pale when Amber started to snort and make an 'oink' noise.

Oh no.

Rachel felt sick to her stomach.

"Oink, oink, oink!" Amber laughed wickedly, as she saw realisation dawn on Rachel's face.

The brunette sprang out of her seat and sprinted out of the dining room and into the disabled toilet that sat round the corner of the lobby. No one ever used this toilet, so Rachel didn't even check to see if it was empty. Leaning straight over the toilet bowl, she let her stomach empty.

"I hate you Amber," Rachel cried as she heaved.

Back in the dining room, every ounce of Quinn wanted to punch Amber square in the face but she knew she wouldn't win that fight; Amber practically lived for confrontation. Why hadn't she stopped Rachel from eating it?

"Fuck you Amber!" Quinn shouted, while giving the girl the middle finger, as she got up off her bench.

"Bring it blondie!" Amber laughed from the other end, continuing to eat her meal.

"You're not worth the effort," Quinn spat out.

Amber just shrugged her shoulders, as she took another sausage and ignored the looks of disapproval and hate coming from her housemates.

As Quinn was about to leave to go after Rachel, Toby stood up as well.

"Hey Quinn?" Toby said, catching up with her, "can I go?"

Quinn looked out the room at the disabled toilet door and then back to Toby.

"Fine, but tell her I hope she's okay," the blonde said, giving Toby a little hug before leaving for her room.

Quinn has known since Rachel got here that Toby has a soft spot for the girl, but so does she in a friend way of course, so she would have preferred to be the one there for the brunette but Toby seemed to want to help.

Knocking and then pushing the door open, Toby stepped into the toilet and saw Rachel crying on the floor.

"Hey," the boy said quietly, "don't damage yourself."

Rachel wiped her eyes and looked up at the boy, a little confused.

"I know you've made yourself sick, don't do that, you're going to be okay," Toby said calmly, closing the toilet lid and sitting on top of it, straightening his bandana as he did so.

"I can't believe she did that to me," Rachel said, as another tear fell, "and I can't believe I ate meat!"

Toby got some tissue for the brunette, handing it to her and squeezing her shoulder.

"One, Amber's a bitch. She's just annoyed because she has to leave in a week as she is turning 21. They've got her a place in a youth hostel a couple of miles away but I think deep down she's realised that she doesn't really want to leave. And two, eating one bite of a meat sausage, which you haven't even swallowed, doesn't make you any less of a vegetarian. We won't tell anyone," Toby winked and changed to sitting on the floor next to Rachel.

"Thanks Toby," Rachel said, as the last of her tears dried.

"Anytime, I understand what it feels like to trust someone and then them lying to you," Toby said as he played with the hem of his Pokémon top.

"How so?" the brunette asked, noting how small Toby looked compared to her.

"Well, you know, just life. You tell someone a secret, they tell someone else or you ask someone for advice and they blatantly lie to your face," Toby shrugged.

"You sound so wise for someone who is only 14," Rachel said, giving his shoulder a little bump with hers.

"I've had to grow up quicker than most," Toby said with a little shake in his voice.

Rachel was going to ask him to expand but Quinn poked her head round the door and gave the brunette a small sympathetic smile.

"Hey, you okay?" the blonde asked, moving fully into the room.

"I am now," Rachel nodded, "Toby made me feel a bit better."

The brunette gave Toby a hug around the shoulders and a kiss on the cheek, which made him blush profusely, before hopping up into a standing position.

"Thanks Toby," she said as she turned to help him up.

"No problem, you know where my room is if you ever need me," Toby said as he ducked his head.

Rachel smiled once before leaving the toilet, enveloping the blonde and bandana boy in silence.

"Someone has a crush," Quinn said jokingly, before punching Toby's upper arm lightly.

"No I don't," he said, as the blush on his cheeks proved otherwise.

"Sure you don't," the blonde laughed, to which made Toby laugh and cover his face with his hands.

"Okay, maybe a little one but that's natural… I'm a 14 year old boy and she is an amazing, and beautiful, 18 year old girl," Toby cringed at his words, "you can't blame me."

"I don't blame you," Quinn said sincerely, a small understanding smile on her lips.

As they both left the toilet and started to walk up the stairs, Quinn spoke up.

"How're you holding up anyway? We haven't spoken properly in ages," the blonde mentioned, opening the door at the top of the stairs for them.

"Yeah because you've been spending all your time with her," Toby joked.

"She's my friend, it's what friends do," Quinn said, tucking her hair behind her ear, before it fell back in front anyway.

"If you say so," Toby said knowingly.

"Anyway, you're avoiding the question," the blonde said more seriously, as they reached their rooms.

"I could be doing better," he shrugged, "my doctor says I need to rest more but that I'm doing all the right things. Sally helps by giving me organic food instead and I'm making sure to take my medication. All you guys help keep my spirits up."

Quinn let a small smile take over her lips; she loved Toby.

"Well, whenever you need anything, you know where I am," the blonde leant in and gave his cheek a small kiss, realising it was the same spot as Rachel and ducking her head.

"Anyway, I've got to get to school," Quinn said with a dramatic roll of her eyes, "see you later dude."

They gave each other a hug, before Quinn quickly jogged down to Rachel's room and knocked lightly.

"Come in," the brunette's voice came from the other side of the slightly ajar door.

Quinn made her way in and smiled when she saw Rachel sticking a picture up on the wall. It was a beautiful painting of a sunset over Pride Rock, with the words 'hakuna matata' painted in stars.

"That's awesome but what does it mean?" Quinn asked, leaning on Rachel's chair.

"It means no worries," the brunette smiled as she turned around, "for the rest of your days. It's a problem free… philosophy…"

Rachel's grin fell when she realised that the blonde still hadn't seen the movie.

"Damn, you won't get my joke… it's from the Lion King," Rachel chuckled, "I can't wait until Sunday."

"This film better live up to my expectations now," Quinn laughed back, starting to head for the door.

"It'll exceed your expectations," Rachel grinned, as she squeezed past Quinn in the doorway.

"Sorry," the brunette mumbled as she thought she was in Quinn's personal space.

"It's… it's cool," the blonde waved it off, as she closed Rachel's door and followed the girl down the corridor.

They walked in silence before Rachel checked her watch.

"Shit! We're going to be late Quinn!" the brunette worried, jogging down the stairs.

The blonde's eyebrows rose at Rachel's language but she shook it off with a laugh.

"It's fine, we can explain we had a vegetarian in danger crisis, they'll understand," Quinn smiled cheekily, before leading the way to her car with Rachel and Ella in tow.

X~O~X~O~X~O~X

"Hey, Jodie Foster, meeting in choir room in ten minutes, it's for Glee Club, surprise, surprise," Santana said over the table in the library to Quinn and Rachel who had just been talking about how they were happy it was Amber's last week.

"Okay, be there soon," Quinn waved off as Santana ran to catch up with Brittany who was carrying a massive pile of books out of the door.

Rachel heard Santana reminding Brittany that they still had to get the books signed out; they couldn't just take them, before the brunette's attention landed back on Quinn.

"Wait, why did she call you Jodie Foster?" Rachel asked, one eyebrow raised.

"Oh, long-running joke, it's because years ago in a school play, I had to play Tallulah from Bugsy Malone," the blonde shrugged, "Santana thought it was hilarious."

"I can see why that would be kind of funny, did you have that little curly piece of hair gelled back?" the brunette started to imagine how Quinn would have looked.

"Oh yeah and the bright red lipstick, the Glee Club won't let me live it down," the blonde shook her head, trying to change the subject.

There was more than one reason why that was Santana's nickname for her but Rachel didn't need to know everything did she?

"Anyway, what I was saying was that you shouldn't let this morning get you down, Amber has always been a trouble-maker," Quinn said, taking a sip from her water bottle.

"Oh I know that, Monday night was a prime example. Her and Justin were really going for it," Rachel mentioned, shivering when she replayed the shouting in her head.

"Yeah, that night," the blonde nodded slowly.

A slightly awkward but mutual silence fell upon the two. They both remember that night, so clearly. It was the night when both realised they each had things they needed to sort out within themselves. As the clock ticked over another minute, of Quinn playing with her ring and Rachel playing with some strands of hair, the brunette decided to break the pause in conversation.

"Yesterday, when we were in the corridor," Rachel began, "you mentioned that maybe, well, you might tell me why you're so scared of the silence and dark?"

Quinn let a small smile form on the corner of her lips, as her head was bent towards the table. She knew Rachel would remember that and it sort of made her happy. The brunette was so soft with her approach that it made Quinn feel as though she was in a fortress of security, that nothing could hurt her here with Rachel.

"1999, when I was 5, I have my earliest memories of being scared of the dark and silence, they both kind of go together," Quinn started, not looking Rachel in the eyes.

Rachel lent in closer and crossed her leg over the other under the table, lightly swooping past Quinn's in the process. They only had ten inches apart from each other now but this moment felt too precious for Rachel to be any further away.

Quinn realised that Rachel was going to find out something that was probably more than the brunette thought she was going to get out of this conversation.

"It was in 1999, when I was in my first home, my only home… Stoneson, that I remember being scared," at this, the blonde looked up only slightly to gage Rachel's reaction.

Cogs turned in the brunette's brain before her eyes went wide and her mouth opened slightly. No words came out, just a small gasp. Rachel couldn't help it as her eyes clouded up a little.

"You've been at Stoneson your whole life?" Rachel said quietly, more as a statement than a question.

"Yeah," Quinn nodded, already feeling too vulnerable for her liking.

She needed to stop talking but when Rachel's hand lightly settled on hers in the middle of the table, her sentences were starting to form again.

"I was in my room, the same room that I have now but back then it was just four walls and a bed, not much else," the blonde sniffed but willed herself to stay calm, "it wasn't under the same management back then, Justin only came to the house 4 years ago, so he has changed it to become a better place since he started."

They let their hands loosen, deciding to settle next to each other, the connection was becoming too much for Quinn.

"Being 5 was hard, it was when I started to realise that I didn't have parents, that Stoneson wasn't my home, it was a house and that the people there weren't my siblings, like they led me to believe," the blonde looked away again, deciding that her fingers were a much safer thing to look at, "everything just seemed like a lie."

Rachel wiped her left eye and then her right. She picked up her pen from the table and began to lightly play with the end, she needed a slight distraction otherwise she may just crumble and hug Quinn until everything was okay again.

"But it was on a winter night that everything really shook me up, as cliché as it was, it was raining and dark and I was only five…"

"Can I have a little biscuit for dessert? My belly is making a noise," 5 year old Quinn tugged at Mark's trousers as the manager, if you could call him that, tossed the dirty dishes on to the pile that was mounding by the mouldy sink.

"That's called hunger babe, you'll get used to it," Mark tapped her head, as he walked passed and up the stairs.

You could faintly hear a couple of televisions in rooms 1A and 2B as they carried on walking down the corridor.

Quinn tugged at her little night dress and tucked her long, very long, blonde hair behind her ear, frowning at how oily it felt. She was pretty sure her bath time was meant to be today. She shrugged to herself, she wouldn't complain, she didn't really like bath time much anyway.

As they got further down the corridor, moving past 4B and 5B they finally got to 6A, Quinn's room. Last room on the corridor; down the very end; with no one in the next two rooms down; all on its own.

"Can I sit in the lounge with you four, I want to watch a movie with you," Quinn smiled, her small tongue poking out between the gaps in her teeth.

"Nah kid, you're sleeping now," Mark yawned, pushing Quinn's door open and realising that he hadn't cleaned it in a while but not really caring.

"Please Mar," the small blonde said, never fully learning how to say his name.

"I'll say it one last time, sleep," he said, getting bored of her little games.

If she hadn't been left in a god damn shopping cart on their step, she wouldn't be his problem. But she had, so now she was here and they had apparently changed their rules and were allowing this little brat to stay.

"I just want to be with you people," Quinn said through a small cough, "I want to make friends."

"We're not your friends and we're never going to be. So you sleep and don't you dare leave this room otherwise you'll be in really big trouble and you don't want that do you?" Mark's voice was getting louder and slightly deeper and his threatening position leaning over Quinn was enough to get his point across.

"Sorry," Quinn mumbled, backing into her room, her eyes not leaving his mean ones.

"Good, now shut it and sleep," he said, before slamming her door with a bang.

She immediately felt alone. It was cold; the dark tree outside her window was creating scary shadows on her walls. She had seen curtains in the rest of the house; she really wished she had some, maybe some blue ones, with pirates on them!

Settling onto her bed, she sat there, realising that she wasn't sleepy.

She looked around.

Nothing.

No pictures, no TV, no mirrors, no curtains, not even a rug.

She didn't know what time it was, so she couldn't even tell if she was being naughty by staying up too late.

So she decided to sing a song.

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a…"

Before she had chance to finish her song, her small night light made a small clinking sound and turned off, leaving the room in complete darkness.

Quinn didn't really know what just happened but she knew that suddenly she felt very scared.

Her heart was pounding and she was pretty sure her hands were getting wet and it wasn't even raining. Can you sweat out of your hands? Maybe she needs to see a doctor.

She hopped off her bed, which was too high for her and tiptoed on her tiny bare feet over to her door, or where she thought her door was.

"Mar? Mar? My… my light has gone. It's off now and I'd really like it on, the light is nice. I'm a little, I feel a little… I feel very scared Mar," Quinn said into the wood of her battered door.

Nothing came back.

"Excuse me?"

She knocked three times.

The darkness was starting to feel cold, really eerie.

She knocked again.

But all she got was silence.

Silence.

And when she spoke out for someone for the next five minutes and knocked over and over again, all she would get was silence.

She stood up on her toes and reached for the door handle. Finally gripping the cold metal with her small fingers, she pulled down on it but was only met with resistance. Mark had locked it.

She didn't even remember him locking it.

So, with nowhere to go for comfort, she slid down the back of her door, wrapped her small arms around her shivering legs and sat there, in the silence and darkness, crying to herself.

Silence was no longer a friend.

And she didn't think darkness would be either.

Quinn wiped her eyes, turning her head away from Rachel, not wanting to be seen. This was too much. These memories, this was all too much and it really hurt. Like, really hurt.

"That went on every night for a few years," the blonde choked out, "I can't say much more right now."

Rachel couldn't speak for the fact that her throat had closed up. Tears were pouring down her cheeks and she knew she probably looked an absolute mess but so did Quinn, so she didn't feel too bad.

Getting up out of her chair, she walked round the table and pulled at Quinn's arm.

"No, it's fine, I'm just going to go to the bathroom and clean up," the blonde said, not looking at Rachel.

"No come on, don't be ashamed of this," the brunette said in a supportive yet still shaky voice from crying, "am I judging? Am I thinking of you any differently? No, I'm not and doesn't it feel a little better to speak about it?"

"Honestly? Not right now, I'm still shaky from bringing the memories back up," the blonde said to the table.

"Come on," Rachel said, pulling Quinn up by the arm.

Before the blonde had the chance to turn away, Rachel had her in a hug. The brunette never really engaged in the hug first but right now it's what Quinn needed.

The blonde gave in and wrapped her arms fully around Rachel's neck, squeezing and letting her last tears fall.

"This stays between us okay?" Quinn whispered unconfidently into Rachel's ear.

"Of course, my lips are sealed," the brunette nodded against Quinn's shoulder, relishing the feeling of the hug.

They begrudgingly parted and Quinn wiped at the brunette's shoulder where she had left a wet patch from her tears.

"Sorry about that," Quinn sniffed, a small awkward smile gracing her lips.

"Don't be, I feel really special that you told me," the brunette said back sheepishly.

"Well, being a part of something special makes you special right," Quinn winked, easing the atmosphere.

Rachel laughed and linked their arms, as they both picked up their bags and headed for the library doors.

Santana opened the doors, not even really noticing the mess of which was the two girls' faces and muttered to them, before going to the computers.

"You missed the meeting, it was boring anyway," she waved off, "catch you two later."

With that, Rachel and Quinn laughed at how long they must have been talking and made their way to the bathrooms to clean up; they looked awful.

X~O~X~O~X~O~X

That night, dinner was a little early. It always usually is on a Thursday as everyone has a meeting with Jay, the councillor, so they make enough time after dinner so that they all get their equal time.

Rachel and Quinn were just finishing giving Sally all the plates when the cook patted Rachel on her shoulder.

"How are you settling in love?" the older woman asked, as she loaded the dishwasher with the plates and cutlery.

Rachel joined her hands in front of her, lightly leaning against the counter on her hip.

"Quite well actually, better than in previous homes anyway," she laughed it off, "I've met some great people."

Sally had heard about how Amber had lied to Rachel this morning about there being vegetarian sausages on the table and thought it was her responsibility to make sure the young brunette was okay.

"I've seen your little group, you seem to get on well and that's really good," Sally nodded, finishing with the last plate, "I know how hard it must be for you to come in somewhere new and have to start all over again. I've seen the 100 or more kids that have come through those doors since I started working here, every one of them more nervous than the last, but you, Rachel, you seem like a little fighter."

Rachel ducked her head. She wasn't brave or a fighter, not in her mind anyway, she just pushed herself further because really, what else can you do when you have nothing left?

"I try my best Sally," the brunette smiled.

"Your best is definitely good enough, dinner time on your end of the table has definitely become more cheerful," Sally smiled, replaying the giggles and laughs of the teenagers in her head.

"How so?" Rachel asked, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Quinn was losing her glow before you got here… you've put a spring in their steps," the cook grinned, before grabbing a rag and heading into the dining room to wipe the table, "keep it up love."

Rachel watched Sally go with a look of confusion yet admiration. Had she made this place more cheerful? She didn't think she had but maybe she had made an impression on one or two of the house's residents, who knows.

She shook her head and made her way into the lobby. Quinn had obviously already gone into the office with Jay, so Rachel just made her way upstairs to sit with the others in the lounge.

Downstairs, Quinn had only just settled into the big chair and popped her feet up onto the desk.

Jay was allowed to use Justin's office for her counselling sessions and Quinn felt no guilt in making herself at home, because hell, this was her home.

Jay sipped on her steaming coffee, before turning a new page of the journal with Quinn's name on the front and got her pen at the ready.

"Content yet contemplative," Quinn said, looking up at the walls.

Jay scribbled into the pad.

"Two more carvings on the wall by my wardrobe, one of a star and another of a musical note," the blonde said, smiling thoughtfully.

Jay wrote it down.

"And today I think I might talk a bit about when I was younger," Quinn said, her lips pursed in a thin line.

She had been seeing Jay for years now, ever since the woman came here for the job when Quinn was 8. The small blonde didn't have to talk to the woman, because she wasn't even a teenager yet but Quinn felt an instant need to have an older person to give her guidance. Jay fitted the bill quite well.

Quinn new the drill now; "How are you feeling today then?", "Any things you've done to distract your thoughts?" and "Is there anything in particular you want to discuss today?".

Jay smiled genuinely before placing her glasses on the table.

"Good day at school?" Jay asked, sipping her coffee.

"It wasn't bad I suppose, I talked to Rachel a bit more, probably more than I would have liked in the moment," Quinn shrugged.

"How do you mean?" the older woman asked.

"Well, we've been getting to know each other better, which is totally fine because I really like her company but I find it so hard confiding in someone. It's just with her, I seem to begin to talk and not be able to stop," Quinn said, moving her feet off the desk and leaning forward on her knees instead.

Jay smiled a little, happy that Quinn had finally found, what seems to be, a really trustworthy and reliable friend.

"Maybe that's not a bad thing," Jay explained, "all these years of having to be quiet and not wanting to get hurt has made you bury a lot, some day it's got to come out… maybe those days are now."

That made sense. Quinn nodded to herself; wise words from an annoyingly wise woman. Quinn got on well with Jay, they shared many of the same views but there had been some days when Jay was so right about Quinn that it would piss the young blonde off or they would disagree about something and then Quinn wouldn't speak to the woman for a few weeks. They would always apologise and start talking again but only on Quinn's terms. It was a very confusing love/hate relationship.

"I told her about the first time my fears came into play," Quinn said, leaning back a little in her chair.

Jay knows exactly which time Quinn was referring to; she remembered how much she had to make herself remain professional and not curl a little 10 year old Quinn into her supportive arms and tell her everything was going to be alright. She had to tell the small blonde that it was very brave of her to tell Jay all these things and that it was always okay to keep talking, whereas all she wanted to do was let herself cry and hug Quinn until the small girl felt okay again.

"And how did she take it?" Jay asked, lightly scribing in her book.

"Okay," the blonde nodded, "she told me she didn't think of me any differently and that she was happy we could share things."

"And so you should, you deserve to have someone like that Quinn," Jay smiled, "it's been a long time coming."

Quinn smiled a little at the woman.

They sat in comfortable silence as Jay wrote down what they had covered today; it was her duty.

Quinn leant forward and picked up the photo that was sat on Justin's desk. It was the same picture that Quinn had above her bed. It was left in this room from previous management; she wondered why Justin hadn't chucked it out yet.

She felt the edges with her nimble fingers, stroking over her younger self and smiling at a grinning Santana. Her hazel eyes momentarily scanned over the other girl under her arms but she just shook her head and laid the picture down again.

"Do you miss Kate?" Jay said quietly, waiting for Quinn's reaction.

The blonde ducked her head and peered out of the window, just seeing darkness, so turned her head back to the safety of the light room.

"Not so much miss, I just wish we'd said goodbye," Quinn mumbled, feeling like her voice would break a little if she were to speak any louder.

The young blonde didn't know how Jay knew she was thinking about Kate, the other girl under her arm, nor did she really mind. Jay just knew; it was the way it was.

"You wanted closure?" Jay said sympathetically.

"In a way, yeah," she nodded, "she was the first person I had ever had feelings for, in a more-than-friend way and it was sort of special, you know? Yeah, I was only 12 but I just miss having that special person in your life. The one which makes you smile every time you see them or when you always enjoy their company or you have your disagreements but then you become friends again because you can't quite go on without them there. We only had a few years together but it was great, I just wish I had closure on the memories of her. It would only take someone else to show me that I could feel those things again for me to forget and stop holding onto those slithers of memories with her."

Quinn hadn't known that some tears had escaped before her hand quickly wiped them away.

"I've had enough for today," the blonde mumbled, "I'm just going to head to bed."

Jay nodded her understanding.

"You have my number Quinn," the older woman reminded her, "it's been good today."

"Yeah, see you next week," Quinn said over her shoulder, as she slipped out the door and took a deep breath of air.

Walking forward, using her sleeve to wipe the remains of wetness from her cheeks, she spotted Rachel napping on the couch in the lobby. Even though she had just had a spill of emotions in Jay's office and she felt way too vulnerable and sad right now, a small smile graced her lips as she moved over to Rachel and lightly shook the girl's shoulder.

"Rachel?"

The brunette stirred a little.

"Rach?"

The nickname fell easily from the blonde girl's lips.

The small brunette slowly started to come round again. She had only been there for about fifteen minutes but obviously it was nature's way of telling her that she was definitely tired.

"Mmmph," Rachel mumbled, sitting up and rubbing at her eyes.

"Hey," Quinn said quietly, self-consciously wiping at her red eyes.

When the brunette finally woke up, she realised that she wasn't alone. Quinn had woke her up; she really hoped she hadn't been snoring.

"Hey, sorry, I didn't realise I'd fallen asleep," Rachel laughed embarrassingly.

"It's okay," the blonde smiled, liking the way Rachel laughed so light-heartedly, "why are you down here anyway?"

That's when Rachel realised why she had come down here. She wanted to chat with Jay. Technically, she didn't have to speak to the woman for another two weeks but she felt like she could start now; it might be nice.

She looked towards the office door and was glad to see that the older woman had left yet. Rachel was pretty sure that Quinn was the last person to have a session with Jay today, so maybe the woman wouldn't mind staying behind for a little longer.

"I thought I might speak to Jay for a little bit tonight, just to get used to it," Rachel smiled, tucking her hair behind her ear.

The brunette wasn't stupid, she could tell that Quinn had blatantly been crying but she didn't want to push the girl, so she let it be.

"Well, only if you're ready," Quinn smiled back, fiddling with her ring.

"Yeah, it might be nice," the brunette smiled back, before getting up off the couch.

"I might see you upstairs then when you're done?" the blonde asked, moving towards the stairs.

"You sure will," Rachel grinned back.

Quinn ducked her head and walked up the stairs, already missing Rachel's company.

The brunette walked up to the door gingerly, knocking lightly on it twice.

A small 'come in' was called from inside and Rachel took the opportunity to open the door.

Jay looked up from her journal and smiled at the new person taking occupancy in the door way.

"Rachel, hi, come on in," Jay smiled, pushing her glasses further up her nose.

The brunette was surprised by the fact that Jay already knew who she was but also wasn't because Jay had a pile of journals with everyone's faces and names on them; duh.

"H-hi, I was just coming to say hi really," Rachel smiled shyly.

Well, that sounded lame.

"Of course," the older woman smiled back, "well, I'm Jay and I come here every week on a Thursday night just so that you can all talk to me, confidentially of course, about anything and everything you want. It's just to have some structure in this place you know?"

Rachel definitely knew. No other home she's been to had a councillor, you could speak to the manager if you wanted to but they never truly cared.

"Yeah, I understand," the brunette smiled, sitting more comfortably in the chair, "well, I'm Rachel; I went to my first home when I was 8 and have been moving around homes ever since really."

She shrugged lightly and let her arms fall naturally to her sides.

Something about Jay made her feel relaxed in her company. The older woman reminded her of someone she may or may not have known and she couldn't for the life of her pinpoint who it was. Maybe it was someone she had just seen in the street once; she was known to have quite a good photographic memory.

"I'm going to just be writing a little bit when you talk if that's okay? It's just for records, nothing gets passed onto to anyone without your permission," Jay smiled over her glasses, already writing stuff down.

"That's fine," the brunette nodded, "what sort of stuff do we talk about?"

Jay laughed lightly and smiled up at the girl.

"Anything you want," she explained, "sometimes you might want to talk about the football," Rachel shook her head with a look of disgust, which made Jay laugh a little, "or you might want to talk about your day at school and sometimes, when we first meet, it might be good if I get a little bit of information about your past, just to give me a good idea about yourself."

Rachel looked down at her entwined hands and rubbed at her thumbs. Her past was something she tried not to talk about if she could help it. Now may be a good time for her to get the strength and just tell Jay about it, it might be better in the long run.

Jay waited patiently as the brunette's cogs worked round in her mind.

"I had two dads, Michael and Jason. My childhood was great, up until about the age of 6 I would say and then things started to get sticky," Rachel willed herself not to cry, not now, "I remember little bits now and again, about how they used to shout, argue, sometimes I would hear them throwing things but I never knew what happened, why things weren't so terribly wrong."

Before Rachel knew it, she gasped and covered her mouth. Why was she saying all this? She never opened up this easily. Her eyes were prickling with the tears that wanted to fall but didn't because Rachel wouldn't let them; maybe later when she was alone.

"Take your time Rachel," Jay said quietly, "say as little or as much as you like."

The brunette nodded. It felt good to get all of the memories of her chest but it also felt really bad, like painfully bad, like her chest was squeezing and her eyes were burning.

"There was one time, the worst time that I can remember, when I truly felt like I didn't have parents anymore, that things had gone too far to be able to be fixed again," Rachel sniffed, not liking how her mind was bringing all these memories back up, "dad was with me downstairs, when daddy came home…"

"You should really get off to bed now Rachel," Michael said, patting a 7 and a half year old Rachel on the head, as he went to get another beer.

"I'm not tired Dad," Rachel smiled, flicking through the TV channels, "I did all my homework early so that I could have TV time."

Michael knew that Rachel wanted to stay up a little later tonight, it was a Friday after all. But he knew that Jason would be home soon and only earlier this afternoon he had found all the emails on Jason's laptop, he needed to speak to him without Rachel there; she didn't need to hear any of it.

"How about, if you go to bed now, I'll give you some extra pocket money?" Michael smiled at his daughter as he walked back into the lounge.

Before Rachel had time to reply, the front door burst open and Jason clumsily put his keys on the side before walking into the lounge.

"Hey you," Jason grinned, giving Rachel a high-five.

She gladly excepted it but it didn't feel natural anymore, not like when she was little.

"Jason," Michael nodded, his lips pressed tightly together.

"What?" Jason said, walking into the kitchen, Michael in tow.

Rachel peered around the corner of the lounge and down the hallway. She could no longer see her dads but she could clearly hear them.

"How do you explain the emails I found earlier today?" Michael said, willing himself not to burst with anger and hurt.

"Which ones would those be then?" Jason said back bitterly, grabbing a glass of water.

"You know," Michael shook his head, "the poker ones, the dating site ones, the ones from 'Andrew' and the ones informing you that you owe the god damn bank thousands!"

Rachel furrowed her eyebrows, she didn't understand any of it. They owed the bank money? They could work through that together; she had saved up loads of pocket money.

"So you know all about it now then?" Jason said, rubbing his temples.

"How are you so calm about this Jason?! 'Andrew' says he enjoyed last week, he says he wishes you could do it every day, he wishes that you two were alone together… who the fuck is Andrew, Jason?"

Jason shook his head. This was all too much. Michael and himself hadn't worked for years, the both knew that. They were just together for Rachel and even that didn't make Jason really want to make things work out. His personal life was too exciting, too intense to let him get on with home life happily.

"He's just a guy who lives about 10 miles away," Jason said a bit quieter, "I've been seeing him for about a year now."

Michael saw red. How could Jason do this to their family? Yes, they hadn't worked for ages, he knew that but to be treated like this by the man who supposedly loved him and respected him? How dare he! He spends the money they both saved up and throws it away on god damn fucking gabbling and has the audacity to just stand there and willingly admit that he's been seeing and probably fucking another guy behind his back?

"I hate you!" Michael shouted, pushing Jason's shoulder, shoving him back against the sink.

Rachel couldn't quite understand things right now. Who was Andrew? Why had daddy been seeing him for a year? Were they work friends? She hadn't been able to see her dads but when her dad had shouted, very loudly, and pushed Jason, her daddy came into view, holding himself up against the sink, also looking very angry.

She flinched when her daddy pushed himself of the sink and launched his body out of view again.

"You've been dragging me down for years, what did you expect me to do?!"

Rachel wrapped her arms around her growing body and quietly, ever so quietly, made her way into the hallway and up the stairs.

She really wasn't feeling very comfortable, her heart was thumping loudly and she had the massive urge to scream but refrained herself against it.

"Not go throwing all our fucking money away and sleeping with another man!"

Rachel started to hum loudly as she made her way to her bedroom.

Crash!

She slid down the back of her door.

Bang!

Smash!

Her small body slightly rocked back and forth as her humming increased in volume.

She could still hear the shouting, she could still hear everything!

Her small lips parted and her voice came into play. The humming wasn't enough, it wasn't blocking it out, it wasn't helping anymore… she needed more.

As Jason and Michael's shouting and thrashing got louder, so did a little Rachel's voice.

"Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket," Rachel sung beautifully.

Another plate smashed.

"Never let if fade away."

Rachel let her voice sing as loud as her heart could express.

"Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket," the brunette sobbed as her voice cracked.

The front door slammed.

"Save it for a rainy day."

Rachel clung around her legs and cried until she no longer had any more tears that would fall.

Jay wiped at her eyes and finally put her pen down. She had to remain professional, just like she had all those years ago with Quinn.

Rachel was a mess. Her beautiful eyes were red rimmed and puffy and she couldn't quite get a full lungful of air.

"Take your time Rachel," Jay said, surprised when her voice cracked a little, "here."

She passed the small brunette some tissues and waited while Rachel made herself calm down.

"I, I didn't know how much that hurt t-to let, to let that out," Rachel stuttered, her heart slowly decreasing back to its normal speed.

"You've been really brave Rachel," Jay smiled slightly, "it it the first step to becoming stronger. Your past is a huge part of your future in a twisted way and the more you want to talk, the better. I'm always on the end of the phone."

Jay silently put her phone number down onto a piece of paper and slid it across the desk into Rachel's waiting hands.

"Thank you Jay," the brunette said sincerely.

"And to you, for telling me those things," the older woman smiled and put her glasses away.

"Have I kept you too long?" Rachel worried, slowly getting up off the chair.

"Not at all," Jay appreciated the girl's sincerity, "did you want to talk more?"

"N-no, it's fine, I think my mind has had enough for today," Rachel laughed lightly, glad that her mind felt almost the slightest bit lighter.

"Well, if that's it then, I'll be off," Jay smiled, moving past Rachel and towards the door, her briefcase in hand, "see you next week if you'd like Rachel."

"Of course," Rachel nodded, "bye Jay."

The older woman gracefully walked out of the room, stopping outside the dining hall to let Justin know she had finished, before leaving the home.

"I could get on with her," Rachel nodded with a smile, before running up the stairs, her feet feeling a little bit lighter than before.

~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~

It was now 1am and Rachel still hadn't got to sleep. Her mind was running at 100mph and she was feeling a little vulnerable now her adrenaline had calmed down. The talk with Jay had made her mind keep floating back over her memories, which she really didn't need when she was trying to fall asleep.

She knew that to get to sleep, she needed a distraction or someone to help her.

Getting out of bed and trying to quietly open her door but failing, she tiptoed the few steps up the corridor and landed outside Quinn's bedroom. She could only hear the slight murmur of the blonde's TV and the light shining from underneath the door, so she really hoped Quinn wasn't in really deep dreamland by now.

As if on cue, as Rachel was about to knock, the door swung open a little, to show two beautiful hazel eyes looking back at her.

"I heard you open your door," Quinn's lips turned up into a small smile, "I was wondering when you were eventually going to knock."

Rachel laughed a little. Her door was kind of creaky.

"Um, you don't mind me annoying you at 1am do you?" Rachel said shyly, consciously tugging her night dress down her legs a bit further.

"Of course not, I'll grab my laptop and duvet now," Quinn smiled encouragingly before disappearing out of view, only to return with an armful of duvet, her laptop balancing precariously on top.

Rachel couldn't help a grin form on her lips at the fact that there was no questioning; Quinn just knew the brunette needed her and she was more than willing to help.

They both returned to the brunette's bedroom and as the blonde pushed the door closed and the room slowly enveloped the pair in relative darkness, Rachel sprung into action and lightly tapped her desk lamp onto the dim setting, making the room light up slightly.

No words were spoken but Quinn gave Rachel a small, thankful smile and dumped her duvet on the floor. Setting up the laptop and shoving in 'Happy Feet', because it was the first one she grabbed, she was all ready to sit down on the carpet and go to sleep but Rachel lightly coughed from behind her.

"You, you could sit up here if you wanted?" Rachel said nervously, not wanting to over step any boundaries but really needing someone with her right now.

Quinn nodded hesitantly. What was so bad about sharing a bed with another person? Watching a movie with Rachel seemed like fun and it would get them both drowsy.

"Yeah, sure," Quinn smiled, grabbing her duvet and waiting for Rachel to move over a little.

They both had their respective duvets snuggled around them, as they both sat with their backs against the wall and facing the laptop which was quietly playing 'Happy Feet' into the room.

As the movie was about an hour in, both girls were slowly starting to feel the effects of sleep overtaking their bodies. Rachel had sunk down a little against the wall as her drowsiness was becoming too much. Quinn was trying to keep watching the movie but her eyelids kept drooping and then opening up again and carried on in that pattern.

As Mumble came back to the other penguins explaining what the humans were planning to do with all the fish, Rachel's head dropped onto Quinn's supportive shoulder.

This jolted the blonde awake a little but not enough to truly know what was going on. She jiggled her shoulder a little at the extra weight and a small, unknown smile overtook her lips. She curled her legs up a fraction and rested her head on top of the warm one on her shoulder.

Rachel was glad that the body beneath her approved of the contact and she snuggled a little closer before sleep overtook her body and she was soon off in dreamland but not before obeying her manners and appreciating the security of her friend.

"Thank you Quinn," the brunette mumbled, sleep finally letting her go.