N/A Okay, um, I'm reeeally sorry for the time it has taken me to update. Life is kinda good right now and I'm just enjoying work, family time and friends. So, in a way, it's kinda good that I haven't been updating because it means I'm happy but because of a few PMs asking me to update, I thought it's only fair for me to do it for you guys. I love writing, so much but I just never really have the time to sit down and let my imagination take me away. So, I have no excuses, it's just finding the time to sit down and write. Please stay with me though, if you want. Much love.
Enjoy, my little story buddies. xxx
"Right, we have ABC as a group number but we need a duet and a solo to finish it all off nicely," Mr Schue explained to the really engaged group.
It was Friday after school, no one really wanted to be there all that much. It was getting warmer outside even though it was early October now – the weather couldn't make up its mind. Most of the group just wanted to go to the local park and enjoy the nice weather or go home and sleep, so when Mr Schue was trying to get any views and opinions out of the group, he was only getting a few nods and some snoring from the back row.
"Okay, you know what, I'll pick the duet and the solo and I'll get back to you next week, how about that?"
Mr Schue shook his head – why were all the kids so tired? Okay, so it was Friday afternoon and it had seemed like a very long week but he needed to get them more enthused.
Rachel was nodding off next to Quinn, as the blonde was thinking of a duet number silently in her head. Santana was filing her nails as Brittany was plaiting her hair. Mike was rubbing his forehead after falling asleep and banging his head on the chair in front. And Finn kept coming up with lame suggestions for a solo.
"Right, everyone up! Let's have a number," Mr Schue clapped his hands, deciding that if talking wouldn't do anything, then singing would.
"Holy crap!" Rachel woke up with a start, grabbing onto Quinn's arm for dear life.
No one really took notice because they all just got woken up too by the looks on their faces.
The blonde was laughing joyfully, as she unclamped Rachel's hand from her arm.
"Someone just woke up then?" she smiled.
Rachel shook her head as her eyes came back into focus. Rubbing them slightly she stretched her arms above her head and let out a sigh.
"I don't know why I'm so tired you know," the brunette mumbled, "I had a nice sleep."
Quinn turned her head slightly away from Rachel, before mumbling her reply.
"Glad you did."
This morning when she woke up, let's just say Quinn freaked out a little for no reason and now she feels stupid. Why had she freaked out? She was practically spooning her friend – and she enjoyed it.
The sun was slowly rising up outside Rachel's curtains and the room was being lit up by a lovely glowing red. The DVD player was still playing ever so quietly in the background on the title screen and the light from the desk lamp was barely recognisable now the sun had awakened.
Quinn was deep in dreamland but her dead arm was making her wake up every now and again but she would ignore it and snuggle closer.
As she woke up momentarily again because of the stupid pins and needles which were now taking over her once dead arm, she snuggled closer and sighed but then sniffed and nearly choked on brunette locks.
She sniffed her nose and wrinkled it up. What was this annoying fur ball in her way? She used her right hand and moved the hair out of her way but more just fell in its place. She was too tired to fight the fur ball, so she wrapped her arm back round her hot water bottle and pulled in.
Within the matter of a second, her bright hazel eyes had shot open and her brain was fully awake. She had untangled herself from her 'hot water bottle' and completely scrambled back on the bed, nearly falling off the end. She had cursed out all the curse words there were and wiped the corner of her mouth where she was sure she had been dribbling – and this all happened within a few seconds. Funny how fast you can move really.
She stared at Rachel's unmoving body and willed her heart to slow down.
Why was she freaking out so much right now?
Her mind was a scrambled mess and she just kept looking on at Rachel. The brunette had pushed most of her duvet off from her body and was probably using Quinn as it instead. The blonde watched as Rachel's chest slowly rose and fell with each breath. She watched as Rachel curled her arms round herself now her big cushion had gone. She saw the space in which the brunette's night dress had ridden up and was now showing a ridiculous amount of leg – the leg that her leg had been tangled with.
Why was she studying her so much?
Her heart had slowed down but her mind had definitely not.
She had never really been a hugger or someone that liked getting close, but there she was god damn spooning her friend. She wasn't freaking out because it felt wrong but because of how right it felt and also because she finally felt secure – she didn't like how it felt almost alien to her.
She slowly rose out of the bed and laid her duvet out on the floor before lying on top of it. She wouldn't be getting to sleep again but at least they had only had another two hours before the alarm would go off.
She would just tell Rachel she was getting too hot sharing the bed. No, that would sound too near the truth. She would say that she thought Rachel would want the bed to herself. Yeah, that would do.
"What did you say Quinn?" Rachel asked, a little confused and totally drowsy.
"Nothing," she turned her head back with a big smile plastered on her face.
"Right, who likes a little bit of Jay Z?" Mr Schue said, starting to scribble down on the board.
"Hell yeah!" Artie waved his arm in the air.
"Totally," Mercedes nodded her approval.
"Okay and who likes a little bit of Alicia Keys?" he continued.
"Who doesn't?" Puck chimed in, finally awake, "she's fit as."
"I wouldn't say no," Santana mumbled, earning a small slap from Brittany.
"Okay, so let's do this!"
The band started the music, having read Mr Schue's 'Empire State of Mind' scribble on the board.
Mostly everyone knew the lyrics by now and as they've been together so long, they just have to look around at each other to judge who would be singing and when – it was all about improvisation and having fun.
Quinn looked at Rachel, who had completely woken up by this point and raised her eyebrow at the girl.
The brunette answered the blonde's silent question by shaking her head and smiling to encourage Quinn to go ahead and sing and jam with the rest of them.
Mercedes started rapping beautifully as the others danced and harmonised around her, Mr Schue joining in with the band.
Rachel bobbed her head a little with the tune, closing her eyes. Everyone came in on the chorus and their voices filled the entire school; it was entrancing.
"Concrete jungle where dreams are made of, there's nothing you can't do, now you're in New York!"
Rachel had unconsciously got up out of her chair and was dancing in the background next to the band, her small converses moving to the beat. Her hips where bopping to the sound and her lips where twitching.
"Catch me at the X with OG at a Yankee game, shit I made the Yankee hat more famous than a Yankee can…"
Everyone laughed at Puck's use of a curse word and thankfully Mr Schue let it slide, revelling in the feeling of everyone letting loose and actually singing for once instead of falling asleep!
The band got more intense as the music prepared for the chorus, as everyone was now standing on tables and chairs while shoving their hands in the air.
"Even if it ain't all it seems, I got a pocketful of dreams… baby, I'm from New York!"
Rachel lips had finally starting mouthing the words and her body was in full motion with the music, her hair was swishing and her eyes were shining.
Quinn looked over to Rachel and momentarily stopped dancing a little when she thought she saw the girl actually singing to the music but could tell from the girl's lips that she was only mouthing the words. Smiling at the freeing expression on Rachel's face, Quinn turned back to the group and they all finished the chorus off.
Unbeknownst to the group, a little brunette's lips were moving along but as the music was so loud and the beat was so intense, Rachel couldn't even think before her small lungs and silent mouth let out the quietest of lyrics, singing smoothly from her pink lips.
"Big lights will inspire you; hear it for New York, New Yor…"
Her mouth clamped shut and her eyes went twice as wide. She greyed by the second and time had slowed down and she was pretty sure she going to puke. Blood rushed to her ears and it felt as though the room was going into tunnel vision. How had she let this happen?
The group hadn't noticed a thing but when Rachel sprinted out of the room faster than anyone had seen someone run before, all singing voices slowly faded out but the band carried on, finishing the song with a bang.
The small frantic brunette had long gone, outside, down the path and round the back of the parking lot. Her chest rose and fell so quickly it didn't look like it was moving at all; tears streamed down her face as her ears were humming loudly.
Bending down to rest her hands on her quivering knees, she was fighting back the memories.
"No, leave me alone, please," she cried, rubbing her temple.
She looked around but couldn't see anything, everything was black, her thoughts were black and she couldn't hear a thing.
That didn't stop her mind though and before she had chance to think, it had backtracked several years and were now burning her mind full of bad memories.
Thursday 15th August 2002. Little 8 year old Rachel ran in from the garden, her short hair wet from where she had been playing in the small pool her Dad had bought for her. She carefully stood on top of the tiny stool that was in the kitchen and grabbed her plastic pink cup before moving over to the sink and just about reaching the tap to pour herself a glass of water. She smiled as she gulped down the refreshing liquid and then put her cup back on the side. Scanning over the floor she realised that she had got the tiles wet… very wet and Daddy was due home soon.
She furrowed her eyebrows and quickly searched for a tea towel or something that would mop it up. It wasn't that she was afraid of her daddy per say but lately the atmosphere had become very intense in the house and the smallest thing would make an argument break out. She had accidently left the lounge light on the other day and her daddy had got very mad at her for wasting the electricity; her dad didn't seem to have energy to back her up in the moment.
Grabbing a tea towel she found on the oven door, she got on her hands and knees and mopped up the puddles she had left, before using the same tea towel to squeeze her hair dry.
Seeing as it was summer vacation, she was having to entertain herself most days and today she chose the small paddling pool but as she was standing there in a sparkly blue bathing suit in the middle of the kitchen, slightly dripping onto the tiles even more, she started to regret her decision; it would only give her daddy another reason to get mad.
Jogging back outside, she drained the paddling pool on to the flowers and rolled it up before putting it back where she got it from. Maybe if she was quick enough, she could dry up before daddy even knew she had had fun in the garden.
Just as the back door was locked by Rachel, the front door was unlocked by Jason.
She spun around on her heel and subconsciously got a little nervous. She was still dripping on the floor.
"I'm going up to change out of my work clothes," Jason shouted from the lobby before starting up the stairs, "had a good day Rachel?"
He hadn't called her a nickname for about 2 years now, it had always been Rachel; her full name, not even Rach. It didn't feel natural anymore, there was no emotion behind the name, it was a label, something that Jason just used to refer to the small girl in his house.
"Yes thank you," she said back, eyeing the puddles forming on the kitchen floor.
Seeing her opportunity, she got another tea towel and cleaned up the current puddles.
She couldn't go up the stairs to the bathroom because then she would get the carpet wet and that was harder to dry. Why hadn't she brought her bath towel with her?
The front door unlocked again and Rachel sighed in slight relief.
"Hi sweetheart," Michael said from the doorway as he peered down into the kitchen, just about seeing his nervous daughter.
"Hi dad," she said back, bending down to wipe her legs dry.
Sweetheart didn't even sound right to her anymore but she supposed it was better than Rachel.
Michael was about to walk down to the kitchen to do his fatherly duties of chatting to his daughter but heard some banging and moving around upstairs and soon thoughts of seeing his daughter had gone and he was powerfully walking up the stairs and heading for the spare room; the room Jason had been sleeping in for a while now.
Rachel knew what was coming.
"You fucking what?!"
She was already getting tearful. She hated this shouting thing; every goddamn day.
"I can't do this anymore Michael!"
"You can't just leave! How am I meant to afford the house, Rachel, the car?"
Rachel pursed her lips at her dad's words; afford her? She wasn't an object.
"I've left a little in the bank," Jason said a little more quietly before storming down the stairs.
"A little?!" Michael was seeing red as he followed his former lover, "oh, gee, thanks Jason."
"I have a different life now, this is getting in the way," Jason said bitterly as he turned at the door.
"I'm getting in the way?!" Michael kicked the suitcase Jason had put down, "all you have done for years now is shit on this family, take my money and screwed people behind my back!"
"Everything is getting in the way!" Jason shouted back, moving into Michael's space, "you, her, this house, this life!"
Rachel's tears were falling. She wasn't stupid; 'her' meant Rachel and Rachel meant his daughter. His daughter was getting in the way.
She started to breathe sharply. She had felt loved her whole childhood; Michael had loved her; Jason had loved her. Was it all a lie?
She leant back against the kitchen counter.
"You have ruined it all Jason! You, not me, you have!"
"See, this is the reason I'm going," Jason shouted as he stormed to the kitchen, where Rachel had wrapped her arms round her body and was shifting from foot to foot in her little puddle of paddling pool water and tears, "we don't work, this doesn't work and I can't… for fuck's sake Rachel!"
He stopped in front of her looking at the mess; the cup on the side, the dripping tap, the puddle of pool water and the wet tea towel at her feet.
"Sorry daddy," she said quietly but was cut off.
"Don… don't call me that. I just need to leave," Jason said shaking his head as he went to the grown-up cupboard.
"That's it, running away from all sense of responsibility," Michael said bitterly, watching Jason grab most of the expensive alcohol.
"Just shut it Michael, I don't need this responsibility, I don't need you and I don't want her," Jason said, looking at the girl that he no longer knew.
It was his fault he could no longer love them, he knew that but his mind didn't really care. He had found an exciting new man, a crazy new life and he didn't want for any of his past. He had given Rachel a nice childhood; she could grow up without him now.
Rachel could feel herself starting to block it out.
"You are a big piece of shit and I don't care who knows it now!" Michael shouted back, slamming his fist on the side, tears streaming down his face from sadness and anger.
Rachel started to sing, she needed it, it needed her.
"Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket," the words came out softly among the loudness of her fathers.
"Yep, big piece of shit that's never coming back, so just let it be!" Jason said as he was getting fed up of this crap and what was that annoying sound in the background?
"Never let it fade away," she sung louder as her heart squeezed.
"You have no right to come back, I hate you, no, I loathe you!" Michael spat at his ex-husband as Jason wiped it off and looked annoyingly at Rachel, the girl who was singing some stupid song right now.
"Yeah, well the feeling is fucking mutual!" Jason shouted back, starting to get kind of pissed off that Rachel is trying to put a goddamn show on for them right now.
"Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket," Rachel sung much louder, needing it to be the only thing she could here.
"Just fucking g…"
"Never let it fade…"
"Oh my fucking god, just shut the hell up Rachel!"
The small brunette's eyes shot open as her mouth clamped shut.
Jason was seeing red, his stupid ex-husband just couldn't have fucking left it, let him be, let him go and then their kid, which isn't even biologically his, has to fucking sing all the goddamn time! Sing, sing, sing!
"Your singing isn't going to change anything! You're annoying little voice is just another thing that makes this whole family shit, you could see we weren't in the mood and you just fucking stand there like the whole world should watch you sing, well you're wrong! Singing isn't going to reduce us shouting, it just makes it worse. Just fucking shut up for one goddamn minute!"
Michael didn't know what to say.
And for once, neither did Rachel.
"Fuck this, I'm leaving," Jason said, shaking his head, "I… I've got to go."
He looked one last time at his frozen daughter and his broken ex-husband and walked out, slamming the door on his way.
Rachel couldn't move. What just happened?
She slowly blinked away the last tear, her eyes flicking down to look at the pool beneath her feet. She wanted to sink into it and never come back up. She felt horrible, guilty, scared, confused, sad and completely lost; in her own home.
"Dad, what just…"
"Don't… please don't talk to me for a while and whatever you do, don't fucking sing," Michael said harshly, his mind racing and his heart gone.
Rachel didn't understand. She didn't understand anything right now. All she wanted to do was sing but the last time she did, her daddy left and now she couldn't because dad told her not too. What could she do now? Who could she ask for a hug? Why does she not feel so good?
Running past her dad, she ran up to her room and slammed the door before falling onto her bed and letting her cries run out.
Michael hadn't even noticed. And he wouldn't really notice her until the day the social workers came and took her away – he had gone, his heart had gone and he didn't quite know how to get it back; and now, he might never get his daughter back either.
Rachel was looking at her feet pushed out in front of her. She had slid down the wall and was unknowingly playing with the rocks and dirt around her. She hated her past, how it crept back up on her and wouldn't leave her be until it had eaten away at her mind and leaked the last of her tears.
She could feel her eyes throbbing and knew she was going to have an absolute bastard of a headache soon.
She threw the rock away, barely missing a car and got up, her wobbly legs only just supporting her.
Momentarily looking down at her watch, she realised that she had been there for an hour, meaning either glee club had gone home or they were just about to and she really didn't need them seeing her like this.
Walking through the parking lot, she looked around and spotted Quinn's little red car waiting patiently in the lot until its owner came and drove it away. Really, she should stay there and wait for her because she was meant to be getting a lift but she didn't think she could face it right now. Quinn would be able to comfort her by talking about school and distracting her but she thinks she will probably just break down the moment she tries to speak to anyone.
So, choosing to walk home instead, she started off on the sidewalk walking briskly in the luke warm air.
~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~
"Rach?" Quinn looked under the bleachers, "Rachel?"
Quinn, Santana and Mercedes had all left glee club a few minutes after Rachel and had been looking for the girl for an hour now.
"Rachel?" Santana shouted out over the field, pushing her hand through her long hair.
"Regroup!" Mercedes shouted to the two other girls and waited for them by the field entrance.
Quinn's eyebrows were furrowed and she was nibbling nervously at her lip, she had been the whole time they were searching for her friend.
"I don't think we're going to find her Quinn," Mercedes said with a look of worry, "she's probably gone home already."
"Yeah, 'Cedes is right," Santana nodded, "she either didn't feel well or didn't like the song."
That had made Quinn laugh a little.
"It was an okay song I thought," she smiled slightly at her friends before starting to head towards the parking lot, school bag already on her back, "thank you for helping look though."
"Why wouldn't we?" Mercedes said as the three of them walked in line.
"Yeah, we're always here," Santana said with a smile but she then looked confused at herself when she realised she had just been really soppy.
"See you guys on Monday," Quinn smiled back as she stopped at her car.
"Text me to let me know how Rachel is when you find her, okay?" Santana asked as she went to find Brittany.
"And me," Mercedes smiled from her car.
They all parted their own ways and Quinn lent against the hood of her car.
"C'mon Rach, where would you have gone…" the blonde mumbled to herself.
As if a small little energy saving light bulb went off inside her head, she dashed to chuck her bag in the trunk and then got in and started the engine. She decided that Rachel was obviously not still at school, or if she was she was hiding very well, so she would drive slowly back home keeping an eye out for the brunette.
She was happy that Mercedes and Santana both wanted to help and they were all worried but she couldn't help thinking that she was the most worried. As soon as Rachel had ran out, she wanted to sprint after the girl but she was in two mind sets: Rachel might have wanted to be alone or she might have wanted somebody with her, so Quinn chose to wait a bit and then go looking; she now regrets her choice.
2 minutes into the drive home and Quinn had to try very hard to ignore the honking cars behind her and the strange looks from pedestrians on the sidewalks. She was driving at about 25kph and peering out of her window to look at every corner of the street and slowing further down to look down alleyways that may lead to other places.
Yes, she looked ridiculous but she was concerned about her friend and the longer she couldn't find the girl, the worse her imagination was making up horrible scenarios of what might have happened.
Turning the corner onto Morson Avenue, she spotted long brunette locks waving in the wind and ripped skinny jeans shuffling along the sidewalk.
She drove up slowly behind, as to not scare the girl, and lent out of her window.
"Rach?" Quinn asked, loud enough for the brunette to hear.
Rachel momentarily froze, not expecting to hear someone call her name and especially not expecting that someone to call her name.
Clearing her throat, she carried on walking forward but replied to the nervous girl driving behind her.
"I'm just going to walk home Quinn, feel like I need the air," Rachel explained, subconsciously picking up her pace.
"No, come on Rachel, please stop for a minute," Quinn asked, pulling the car up so that she was completely in line with the girl.
Only then did she see the mess of Rachel's face. The girl's eyes were red and puffy and it looked like she had been nibbling on the corner of her lip because it looked mildly swollen.
"Oh man," the blonde sighed sadly, before putting on her hazard lights and getting out of the car.
Rachel ducked her head, letting her hair hide the mess. She really didn't want Quinn to see her like this.
The blonde just stood next to the brunette for a few seconds, letting the other girl make the decision of what she wanted to do. Rachel didn't move, she just wrapped her arms around herself even more.
"Hey," Quinn said, lightly putting her hand on the brunette's shoulders, "we don't have to talk about it if you don't want to but you know that I'm here to listen and that I won't judge and I won't complain, just simply listen and offer hugs if that's what you need."
The last part made a tiny, minuscule smile form on Rachel's lips and a tiny cringe form on Quinn's. Did she just offer hugs? What was happening to her?
The blonde removed her hand and stood back again.
Rachel slowly lifted her head and wiped at her eyes with the back of her hands. She didn't know what to say, she didn't really know what to do but she was going to go with what her heart needed.
Quinn was slightly bending down trying to convey what Rachel's face was saying but she couldn't work it out. The blonde looked away for a mere few seconds to check that a traffic warden wasn't going to book her for leaving her car there, when suddenly her waist was engulfed by small arms and her neck suddenly filled with Rachel's hair.
Quinn's body tensed out of habit but immediately relaxed when she realised that, of course, it was Rachel. She wrapped her arms around the girl's shoulders and slightly rested her chin against the side of Rachel's head – she may have sniffed the girl's hair a little, the shampoo smelled amazing.
They stood like that for a minute or so, both relaxing at the comfort, a brunette more so. The traffic whizzed past and cars honked at Quinn's car being in the way but both girls couldn't care less; the cars could honk all they wanted.
"I sang," Rachel mumbled into Quinn's top.
"Huh?" the blonde asked, not having heard the whisper.
Rachel pulled back, untangling her arms from the blonde and straightening the bag which had slipped down her arm in the embrace.
"I sang," the brunette said a little louder, not looking Quinn in the eye, "in Glee Club, I sang a sentence of the song."
Quinn was a little confused. She knew Rachel didn't like singing, she made that clear as day to Mr Schue but the reasoning of why was unknown to the blonde. That didn't matter right now though, what mattered was she needed to be there for her friend.
"I'm sure it'll be okay…" Quinn started off but was interrupted.
"It's not though!" Rachel raised her voice somewhat, kicking her shoe at the sidewalk, "singing only makes everything worse, singing is annoying, singing makes bad things happen… and singing… singing… j-just… makes people… leave."
The brunette fell back against the wall to someone's front yard and started to cry again.
She sniffed her tears back, willing herself to stop.
"That's what daddy said."
Quinn watched on in worry and helplessness. The blonde was trying to work things out but all she could make from Rachel's shouting was that her 'daddy' didn't sound very nice.
The brunette wiped once more at her eyes and looked up sheepishly at Quinn.
"I… I don't think I want to speak about it right now," she said quietly, straightening her shoulders a little.
"If that's what you want," Quinn said back with a small sympathetic smile laced on her lips.
Rachel just nodded.
Quinn looked back at her car and a small chuckle came from her throat.
"You want to change the subject then?" the blonde asked, giving Rachel's upper arm a small comforting stroke, calming both of them.
Once again, the brunette nodded.
"All I'm going to say is that I must have held up the whole of Ohio's traffic trying to look for you," Quinn laughed a little, a dopey smile on her lips.
Rachel's lip turned up.
"Really?" the brunette felt a little lighter.
"Yep. I'm surprised I wasn't pulled over by the cops, I was doing about 25kph and was sidewalk crawling in my car," Quinn was grinning now, "I must have looked like such a creep."
This made Rachel giggle.
"Probably," the brunette smiled a little.
"Hey!" Quinn feigned shock but went to take Rachel's bag.
Walking around the trunk, she plopped Rachel's bag in with hers and then went round to open the passenger door for the girl.
The brunette slipped in and sighed with the comfort of letting her legs rest.
"Hey, are you hungry?" Quinn asked, leaning against the car.
Rachel nodded, smiling up at the blonde.
"Here, pamper yourself a little if you want, I'm just going to make a call," Quinn said, handing across her little foundation pot she had in her pocket and some tissues.
"Don't worry, I'll just do it when we get home… to the house," Rachel said back, her voice still a little hoarse.
"We're not going straight home," Quinn gave the brunette a little cheeky smile, "I'm going to take you out for lunch; you deserve it."
Rachel ducked her head a little before opening up the foundation and applying some under her eyes.
Quinn closed the girl's door and stood on the sidewalk as she rang up Justin.
"Stoneson House, Justin speaking."
"Hey Justin, it's Quinn," she said quietly.
"Hey, everything okay? You're late back," his voice had a little worry in it.
"Yeah, well, no. Rachel ran out of Glee Club after school and she isn't really in a good place right now. Can I take her out for lunch instead of back at Stoneson?" Quinn asked, hoping Justin would be okay with that.
Justin sighed a little, not at the fact that Quinn and Rachel wanted lunch out but more from the fact that there wasn't much money in the bank.
"Sure, I'll reimburse you when you get back," Justin said, a small smile in his voice, "just enjoy it okay. Treat her if you want."
~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~
"And well, I've never sung since, that's why I freaked when I kind of did sing in Glee."
Rachel ended her long spiel about why she had run away from Glee, as Quinn was trying to hide her tears behind her hot chocolate but was failing miserably.
"I… I'm not sure what to say," Quinn wiped under her eyes, "apart from the fact that your Dad was wrong. Singing is good for you."
Rachel gave a half smile.
"I think I know that now," she shrugged, "but I just can't quite shake off my past just yet. It stays, it haunts me but I'm getting there."
They both looked at each other, their eyes saying other things but neither of them quite knowing what to say or do. Simultaneously, they both looked back down at their deserts and went back to eating – this chocolate cake was amazing.
"You want to know something?" Quinn asked, feeling as though things needed a bit of lightening up.
"Sure," the brunette smiled back, taking a big forkful of cake and sighing at the taste.
Quinn gave a small smirk and picked a piece of cake onto her fork before looking at it longingly.
"It's true," she smelled the cake, "chocolate does make everything better."
She grinned playfully before shoving the forkful into her mouth and making her pleasure audible.
This made Rachel laugh out loud; smiling at how silly Quinn looked with brown chocolate cake in her teeth. It made her laugh even more when Quinn grinned at the waiter when he came to get their plates, and she still had cake in her teeth.
"Uh, Quinn, teeth check," the brunette giggled.
"Oh, thanks," the blonde ducked her head in embarrassment, before using her tongue to clean her teeth.
Why was she getting embarrassed?
Before she had time to think, the check came and they were off back to Stoneson: stomachs full and minds at ease.
"That was a really nice meal," the blonde smiled, opening Rachel's passenger door for her, "let's just get home now. We have a big day tomorrow!"
"Oh yeah," the brunette grinned, settling in her seat before clapping her hands together, "it's Lion King day!"
As soon as Quinn got in she laughed to herself before pressing on the gas pedal.
"No, I meant it's your first day at work but Lion King will do I suppose."
Turning the radio on full blast, Quinn took the long way home, basking in the feeling of freedom and warmth. By the time they got home, it was dark and they both went to bed feeling very happy – even when Quinn knocked on Rachel's door 20 minutes after they both said goodnight to ask if she could sleep on the brunette's floor again. Sleeping in the same room had become a sort of routine – it felt odd to sleep on their own now.
~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~
"Here is your uniform and you get a small break, same as Q here and no chit-chatting while working, capire?"
Alfonso, Quinn's kind of hunky Italian boss, chucked Rachel her new work top and apron before answering his phone call.
"Sì, lo so, ho capito…"
"That's so cool that he can speak Italian," Rachel gushed, looking on after the man.
"Well, he is Italian, so kind of makes sense," Quinn laughed a little.
The brunette nodded before taking her eyes off the man. Quinn raised her eyebrow at Rachel's staring before smiling amusedly and walking off to show Rachel where she can get changed.
"This is our little staff room, you can change in here if you'd like, I'll be out front," the blonde smiled, passing Rachel a hair-tie and some hair grips, "Al doesn't like bad hygiene. Hair up, apron on and a big smile!"
Rachel laughed before pushing the door closed and laying her new uniform out. Alfonso knew she was coming a week ago, when Quinn had begged him to give the girl a job, so he had got the small brunette a uniform, already stitched with her name on it.
Rachel stroked over the small white letters on the maroon coloured top and grinned. She had never really had a uniform – she felt like part of a team.
Slipping into her new clothes, which felt super soft on her skin, she tied her hair back and smiled into the mirror on the wall before looking away quickly. She never really liked seeing herself for too long at a time, it made her feel weird.
Walking out into the shop, which seemed bigger than Quinn made it out to be, she walked down a small aisle and to the little cash desk at the front, where Quinn was serving a customer.
"Is that all today Betty?" Quinn smiled, packing a few items into a brown bag.
"That's all love, only a small shop today, nothing special," the elderly lady smiled back, handing over some change.
Quinn put the cash into the till, quickly looking over her shoulder to see the brunette hovering just behind the cash register point, and then looked back to Betty.
"There you go Bets, $2 change and have a lovely day," she grinned, "see you next week."
"Will do," Betty smiled, pushing her little cart out of the door, shouting back over her shoulder, "take care now!"
Quinn sighed happily, before turning round and leaning back against the cash register.
"I don't know anyone who doesn't like Betty," the blonde shrugged.
"She seems lovely," Rachel smiled.
"She's been a regular here for years now, ever since Al opened the shop up," she said matter-of-factly, "you'll get used to the regulars."
Rachel hoped so. She wanted this job to go well, she had never had one before.
"You can step further behind this register you know, this is our space, only staff allowed!" The blonde grinned.
She secretly loved this job, it wasn't pressuring or hard and Alfonso was a good guy.
Speaking of which, Al came down the stairs which led up to his little flat above, one of many he owned and spoke up over the aisles to Quinn and Rachel, before appearing at the front of the shop.
"I've got to go to my shop down South, someone smashed a window but I trust you to make Rachel at home and teach her the ropes? Just lock up after you and make sure to not leave all the lights on like you accidently did last time okay?" He chuckled.
"Will do Al," Quinn nodded.
"Siate buoni ora," he reminded them.
They both waved him goodbye, a bit more enthusiastically from Quinn – Rachel still had to warm up to the guy.
"What did he say?" the brunette asked.
"'Be good now', basically meaning don't let the shop burn down," Quinn laughed light-heartedly.
"You know Italian?" Rachel grinned, leaning on her tiptoes and then plopping back down again.
"No, I just know Al," the blonde smiled.
After a couple of hours had passed, it was time for a small break. Seeing as Quinn had to train Rachel to clean the toilets, they would have no one manning the shop, so for ten minutes putting the closed sign on the door wouldn't do any harm – it was strangely quiet today anyway.
~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~
"Mask? Check. Gloves? Check. Apron? Check," Quinn was looking around her, while she tightened the mask around her face, "oh, extra clean gloves? Check!"
She looked before her at the door with the toilet sign carved into it.
She turned to her right to look at Rachel, who was looking at Quinn with an amused smile and trying very hard not to laugh.
"We can do this," the blonde said seriously before nodding at the small brunette and kicking the door open with her foot.
The door creaked slowly as it opened, revealing a toilet and a wash basin next to it.
Rachel looked past Quinn and noted to herself that it really didn't look too bad.
"Okay, step one…"
Quinn swallowed visibly before stepping slowly up to the toilet.
Using her double-gloved hand, she lifted the toilet seat while closing her eyes.
Inching her eyes open, she peered down the bowl.
"Ahhhhh!" Quinn slammed the seat shut and jumped up and down, "I can't do it! Ew!"
She ran past Rachel and pulled her mask down so that she could breathe in a lungful of non-toxic air.
"Ew ew ew," the blonde mumbled to herself.
Rachel let her laughs fill the air, before chucking on a single pair of gloves and shoving her hair up into a bun before tying it up.
"Don't worry, I've got this," Rachel shook her head as her laughs died down.
Lifting the toilet seat, there was nothing there, other than a small stain on the edge but that was just from wear and tear.
As Rachel got to scrubbing, she could hear Quinn walking around the store mumbling something along the lines of, "I don't get paid enough for this crap."
This made the brunette giggle. She had never been this amused while cleaning a toilet before.
~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~
"Ahh, I'm so excited! You're going to love it," Rachel squealed as she jumped over the back of the couch in the common room and sunk into the cushions.
"Well, at least I hope you do," she said with concerned laced on her face.
Quinn just smiled over her shoulder and inserted the DVD into the small slot on the side of the 30" TV that sits in front of the bay window. The blonde turned the TV on before taking off her coat and chucking it down onto the floor.
Rachel was jumping up and down where she was sitting, looking like a little kid at Christmas, well, Hanukah.
"Ooh!"
The brunette jumped up and ran over to Quinn, dodging past the girl and reaching up to drag the curtains closed, engulfing the room in relative darkness, apart from the setting sun streaming in through the little gaps down each side of the hanging fabric.
"I'll be back!"
Rachel ran out of the common room, leaving an amused Quinn behind.
Downstairs, Rachel knocked timidly on the kitchen door, waiting for a response.
"You can open it," Sally spoke back, sounding busy.
Rachel pushed the door open and poked her head around the corner.
"Oh, Rachel sweetie, come on in," Sally smiled, putting down the potatoes she was scrubbing.
Rachel tentatively walked into the small kitchen and started rubbing her hands in front of her.
Sally noted Rachel's stance and could see that Rachel still needed time to become completely comfortable with her company.
"What can I do for you today Rachel? Would you like extra dinner tonight?" the older lady laughed and gave her a smile.
"Thank you for the offer Sally, but that's quite alright," Rachel smiled back, "I'm actually here, if it was okay, well, I'm not sure how it works at Stoneson, I don't know if I'm allowed…"
"Would you like some snacks for the movie you're about to watch?"
Rachel looked stunned. This woman was psychic!
"Umm, is that okay? Just a few for Quinn and I," the brunette grinned sheepishly.
"Of course sweetie," Sally went over to a small cupboard by the fridge, "only because it's you and Quinnie."
Rachel only felt complete love and acceptance from Sally and she could see herself really liking this woman.
Rachel's eyes shone in want, when she saw the cupboard was full of popcorn, chocolate, candy and fruit baskets.
"Saved for special occasions," Sally said, as she grabbed handfuls of each kind and shoved them all on a tray.
"Um, I don't think we'll need that much," Rachel said, as the pile of treats grew bigger.
Sally turned around and placed the tray in Rachel's waiting arms, weighing her down by a tonne.
"Oh sweetie, trust me when I say that if you're watching the movie in the common room, with treats as well… you won't be watching it just with Quinn."
Rachel smiled amusingly and turned to leave.
"Sally," she turned at the doorway, "thank you for these."
"Any time love," Sally grinned and went back to scrubbing the potatoes.
Rachel looked down in her arms and let out a little squeal before leaving and jogging up the stairs and dropping a few candy bars on the way, before fumbling around to pick them up.
"She's a good one that one," the cook said to herself gleefully and went on with making dinner.
Back upstairs, Quinn was wondering where Rachel had got too, as the menu screen to 'The Lion King' played again and again on the screen. Just as she was about to head downstairs, Rachel came running in, arms full of falling candy and chocolate bars.
"Oh my god Rachel," Quinn laughed as she went to Rachel's rescue.
"Did Sally give these to you?" the blonde asked as they both shoved all the treats onto the coffee table in the middle of the couches and beany bags.
"No, I broke into the kitchen, fought off the neighbourhood cat, started a kitchen fire, got the treats, ran back before ninja jumping over Justin and running up here after free-running up the wall and doing a backflip, whilst keeping all the treats on this tray!"
Rachel grinned cheekily and then burst out laughing.
"Yeah, Sally gave them to me," the brunette jumped back in the couch after grabbing two handfuls of chocolate and candy, "but that would have been awesome if I had done all that."
"You're too sarcastic for your own good," Quinn chuckled, before settling next to Rachel on the middle couch and pressing play.
"I'm so happy you're finally seeing this," Rachel smiled as she grabbed Quinn's arm in excitement, as her other hand shoved a Hershey's chocolate bar into her waiting mouth.
"Same here," Quinn smiled happily, as she looked at Rachel for a moment before she was snapped out of her trance.
"Quinn, look at the screen, it's starting!"
~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~
Not even 2 minutes into the film, 'Circle Of Life' was blaring as loud as you like from the common room and down the whole top floor, bringing Toby peering round the doorway.
He waited there for a few seconds before he caught Rachel's eye and she smiled warmly as she waved him in enthusiastically.
He sat down in front of the couch before leaning onto his knees.
"May I?" Toby asked as he leant towards the chocolate.
"Just the one," Quinn winked.
"Shh!"
Both Toby and Quinn looked towards a concentrated Rachel, as the brunette tucked her legs up onto the couch with her, before resting her arms on top of her knees and mouthing along to the words.
After about 5 or 10 minutes, the next musical number was coming up – 'I Just Can't Wait To Be King'.
"Ooh, this one is awesome, you'll like it," Rachel whispered towards Quinn, her eyes still stuck to the screen but her head pointing towards the blonde.
Rachel had basically said that to Quinn before every scene and every little quote or funny saying from each character.
Normally it would annoy her, but for some reason, it wasn't today.
"I'm gunna be a mighty King, so enemies beware!"
"Well, I've never seen a King of beasts, with quite so little hair…"
"Psst!"
Quinn turned her head towards the door, where Anna was stood tapping her foot and looking excitedly at the screen.
"Can we?" Anna mouthed, the music being so loud that no one would have heard her even if she had spoken.
"We?" the blonde mouthed back, flicking her eyes back to the screen and laughing when Simba roars at the bird, whose name she can't remember, before she turned back to Anna.
As she looked at the door, Anna dragged Eddie into view and he was wearing his Simba onesie and carrying his Pumba cushion. It made Quinn giggle seeing a guy with eyeliner, lip piercings and a mohawk wearing a 'Lion King' onesie.
Quinn made a gesture with her eyes that said they could come in.
Eddie dived straight into the candy and then jumped into a free beany bag before digging into his treats. Anna sat next to him on the floor and then stole some of his candy, much to his disapproval.
Laughter, quiet chatter and eating filled the room.
Quinn was enjoying the film and she loved the company of her friends and seeing Rachel so happy was making her smile – yesterday was still playing on Quinn's mind and having heard about Rachel's past and how she was treated, the blonde was determined to make the brunette's weekend a good one. Work had lightened the brunette's mood earlier and the film has seemed to get her on a high – so far so good.
Another ten minutes passed with everyone enjoying the movie and the sun long gone, before Ella got through the front door.
"I've really enjoyed this evening," she smiled sweetly to Jack, the boy she had been seeing for a few weeks now.
"I really liked it too…" he smiled back, as they both held hands, "umm, is that… is that 'The Lion King'?"
Ella turned away from him, pointing her ears in the direction of the stairs.
"Oh my god, it is!"
She shrieked and then quickly dived into Justin's office to ask if Jack could stay before dragging the boy up the stairs and running down the corridor to get to the common room.
They came to an abrupt halt outside the door and everyone was already looking towards them, having heard the stampede.
Ella grinned at Rachel and Quinn gave Jack a nod of welcome.
The pair came in quickly and snuggled onto one bean bag as they dove into the snacks and watched the screen.
Rachel looked towards Quinn and made an 'aww' face while pointing at Ella and Jack. Quinn rolled her eyes and then chucked a piece of popcorn at the back of Ella's head. The girl turned around and Quinn just gave her a wink and a thumbs up, while motioning to the boy. Ella went red and then chucked a chocolate bar back at the blonde.
"Ouch!"
Rachel swatted Quinn's arm to make her be quiet before going back to watching Scar parade through his song as the hyenas danced around.
After the saddest scene of the movie passed, with Quinn turning away from the group to wipe a few stray tears away, a happier song started playing, which in turn made Rachel bounce up on to her knees and mouthed along with the words.
Luckily, for Justin, no one had seen him standing in the doorway bubbling away as Simba had seen his dad pass away. As 'Hakuna Matata' starting playing, Justin was boogying away in the corridor, shaking his hips and jumping up and down.
Quinn was grinning away. This song was amazing! How had she never seen this movie before? Taking another bite out of her chocolate bar, she let the smooth silkiness of the dairy goodness sit on her tongue for a little while. Damn, she loved chocolate and annoyingly, so did her hips.
Everyone was swaying and bopping along to the song, Ella using Jack's hand to dance, earning a cute smile from the boy.
Half way through the song, Rachel could hear someone singing the song. It was coming from the back of the room and she didn't quite know who it was. Turning slightly over her shoulder, she peered at the doorway. The sight made her giggle and hold a hand over her mouth. This caught Quinn's attention, which in turn made her look in the same direction. The blonde just rolled her eyes, having seen Justin dancing before and smiled, before turning back to the screen.
They didn't tell the others – they didn't want to embarrass him even more.
The man was in his own little world though, eyes closed, hips shaking and before he knew it he was bursting out the words.
"Hakuna Matata, what a wonderful phrase! Hakuna Matata, ain't no passing craze! It means no worries… for the rest of your days…. it's… it's a… problem… prob… lem… free… philosophy."
As Justin opened his eyes, the whole room was staring at him. This resulted in his cheeks burning bright red.
He looked at Rachel who was trying not to cry due to laughing so much, Quinn was holding back a giggle and Jack was just looking completely lost.
"And from that young ones, you learn that it means no worries."
A quick nod to the group and a cough to clear his throat (and embarrassment) and then he was off, striding down the corridor and down to his office, shaking his head along the way. Had he just sung to a Disney film? At his age?
As he entered his office, he shrugged.
"I suppose age is just a number. Anyway, I must make a note to get myself one of those onesies Eddy was wearing; that was awesome."
~X~O~X~O~X~O~X~
As the credits start rolling, the tears start falling for one blonde.
All the other kids stretch out and start chatting quietly to one another, asking how their days have been or reacting scenes from the film.
Rachel lent nearer to Quinn and leans down a little to peer at her face.
"So?"
Quinn sniffs before chocking out her words.
"They had to kill off Mufasa?!" the blonde whined, before a fresh tear rolled down her cheek.
Rachel giggles to herself, before pulling Quinn into an innocent hug.
"That's the circle of life," the brunette laughs, "but I take it you liked the movie then?"
Quinn just silently nods into the other girl's shoulder, relaxing immediately at the embrace.
"Hey hey hey!"
All eyes shot up to doorway as Santana and Brittany sauntered in.
Quinn grinned surprisingly and gave Rachel a smile before jumping off the couch and giving Santana a hug.
"What brings you back?" the blonde smiled, giving Brittany a hug too.
"Someone here heard Rachel mentioning something about 'The Lion King' yesterday and couldn't resist coming over," Santana rolled her eyes and gave Brittany's hand a squeeze.
"Am I too late?" the bouncy blonde asked.
Rachel looked a little guilty.
"Um, yeah, sorry Brittany, but we can watch it again after dinner? I don't mind at all," the brunette grinned, realising this was just an excuse to watch the movie again.
"I don't know if I can go through that sadness again," Quinn shook her head.
This response just earned a laugh from San and a hug from Brittany.
"Snacks guys? We've got some left," Rachel got up and offered the tray to the girls.
"I don't want to spoil my dinner," Brittany said.
"Screw that, it's chocolate."
Santana dove right into the snacks, opening three chocolate bars and shoving them into her mouth in one.
"Damn, your mouth is huge," Eddie piped up from the corner.
"Brittany doesn't complain," Santana winked back, crumbs falling out.
Everyone laughed at her response, some cringing more than others. Toby just looked confused. Rachel's cheeks had gone red and Quinn was rolling her eyes.
"I don't get it."
Everyone turned around to Toby. Santana should have realised her audience. Swallowing her mouthful, she skipped on over to the boy.
"It doesn't matter Tobes, how are you?" the brunette grabbed the boy and gave him a crushing hug.
"I'm good thank you," he laughed as the girl went to tickling him instead.
"Tickle fight!" Anna shouted and jumped onto Santana's back, pushing the girl to the floor as Eddie joined in by lifting Toby up and onto the back of Anna, helping the small boy win the fight.
"I give up… I give up!"
Santana crawled out from underneath and feigned gasping for breath.
They all collapsed back down onto bean bags with Santana cuddling Toby in front of her.
"Anyway kid, haven't you got a big day coming up next week?" Santana asked, straightening his bandana.
"Yeah," the boy said shyly.
Rachel looked over to them. A big day? This sounds exciting.
"Yeah, our boy here is turning 15!" Eddie says out loud, giving a cheer and throwing all the candy wrappers into the air, so they rain down on young Toby.
Everyone gives a cheer and Rachel grins. She loves birthdays – that one special day where you have that little extra bit of attention and you normally get cake, which is always nice. She's already planning in her head to make it a great day for the boy.
"Anything little you want kiddo?" Santana asks, squeezing out from behind him and jumping next to Brittany on a bean bag.
Toby thought for a while.
"Not really. Just a big chocolate cake," he grinned.
"There must be something you want," Anna said, "it doesn't have to be little, we can all chip in."
"Honestly it's okay," he shook his head, "well, maybe…"
"There we go," Santana smiles, "boy's got ideas!"
"Maybe a karaoke game for the Xbox? We only have Halo and I'm not a fan of that, but a karaoke game with some mics would be awesome."
Toby said, smiling at the idea of karaoke.
"But obviously not if it's too expensive."
"Hey now, we can try and make something happen," Quinn piped up, reassuring the boy, "can't we guys?"
"Hell yeah," Eddie smiled, giving Toby a high five.
"Thanks guys," the youngster smiled, "anyway, I'm off to bed now. I can't do these late nights."
"Yeah, me too," Ella said, as she got up and left to go and let Jack out and maybe getting a goodnight kiss.
As everyone slowly started to leave the common room and go their separate ways, it left Santana, Brittany, Rachel and Quinn chilling on the couches and bean bags.
"Santana, are we tutoring tomorrow?" Rachel asked, as she stretched out on the couch next to Quinn.
"Yeah, if it's still okay for you? I need to go over algebra," she said, as she pretended to gag.
"Of course, was just double checking," the brunette smiled back.
"This maths talk is really fun and all, but are we going to watch the Lion King?" Brittany said, with a look of hope on her face.
"Let me guess, you've asked Justin if you can sleepover tonight?" Quinn asked, knowing Santana all too well.
"Maybe," Santana winked back, "go and grab the duvets and pillows Quinnie."
The girl grinned cheekily at her best friend and leaned out on the bean bags, grabbing the remote and pressing play on the title screen, before upping the volume.
"Oh and more snacks babe," the girl winked over her shoulder at the blonde, earning a foot stomp from Quinn.
"If it wasn't you San, I wouldn't let people talk to me like you do," the blonde rolled her eyes and got up and left.
"You love it really!" Santana shouted out at the leaving girl.
Rachel was just giggling to herself, sharing a quick glance with Brittany, who was enjoying the scene just as much as she was.
Tonight had been fun, she actually kind of felt… well… at home.
HuhHuhhUHHHasfc ,m