Hello, have another chapter! :) I hope to get one more out before the next episode too, if all goes well. They are flying.
Thanks for all your support and reviews!

Shout out to guest reviewers, since I can't answer any other way. Priscilla, your long and detailed review made me so happy and had me blushing! Thank you! tadz, your enthusiasm continues to make me laugh. KyannaLashae, you have been reading my stuff since the beginning and I thank you so much for your continued support and enjoyment! :)

I appreciate all my readers/reviewers! Hugs to you all!

As always, thanks so much for reading! Hope you enjoy it! :)

Chapter 13

Iris spent the night getting little sleep and thinking. She grieved for the end of her and Eddie's relationship. She could see no way to salvage it. The difficult part was that she couldn't truly say that either one had broken up with the other. She understood his side. But she realized her feelings for Barry were an issue too.

Barry's Christmas confession had thrown her into a huge quandary. She had long ago closed the door to any possibility of being closer than just best friends with Barry. For the sake of her sanity it had been imperative that she resign herself to the fact that he wouldn't wake up. She had said goodbye, and she had moved on. Her relationship with Eddie had been different but really good.

When Barry had told her he loved her, the incredible irony of the timing had not escaped her. She couldn't believe it. If only he'd said something sooner. If only he hadn't been struck by lightning. If only...if only. That was partially why she had cried. He had been too late. She was with Eddie and she loved him, she couldn't just drop him and run after Barry. She had no idea how that would even turn out. Eddie was safe. Eddie was a known factor, a great boyfriend. Barry was her best friend.

But she hadn't been able to stop thinking about it. About him. She'd been busy ignoring it until Barry had started dating Linda. That had been so strange. It had been hard to watch Barry kiss and date another girl. But she'd figured she would get over it. When Linda had asked her about Barry she had honestly been trying to help. Her advice had been to give Barry time. But now she wondered, as hard as it was for her to come to terms with her own feelings, if she had meant give me time. Slow down, give me time. Time to figure out what she really wanted. Time to deal with what she felt about Barry without having to worry that he would move on so fast she would run out of time to sort it out.

Barry had truly been upset that she had inadvertently sabotaged his budding relationship with Linda. She hadn't intended to, and she had really meant it when she had apologized. She had always wanted him to find someone who appreciated him for the wonderful person he was. But now that he had, she wasn't as happy as she should have been. He had told her he didn't have those feelings for her anymore, and for a moment she had wanted to cry. She had quickly covered it with her response that she knew that. It should have been done then. Everything back to normal now. She could move on and not have to worry about her feelings. But she hadn't. They were a tangled mess that just sat inside.

In the end, Eddie had untangled them for her. She couldn't seem to hide it from anyone except herself and Barry. Was it really that obvious? She felt like she was wearing a billboard on her forehead.

She also felt paralyzed. Stymied into inactivity. She still didn't know what to do, so she was going to do nothing for now.

It was becoming her default pattern, apparently.

The following morning Joe tapped on her door before he left for work. She sat up and pulled the covers to her shoulders as he sat down on the edge of the bed. He looked extremely serious. Iris waited.

Joe opened his mouth at least twice before he could actually make words. Finally he leaned in close to her face, looking her in the eye. His voice was low and intense.

"Did Eddie hurt you?"

"What? No!"

Joe was obviously looking into her eyes to detect any lying on her part. When he found no evidence of it he looked like he might melt onto the bed, he was so relieved. "I am so glad. Now I won't have to shoot him."

Iris laughed in spite of herself. "Please don't shoot him, Dad. He doesn't deserve it."

"Do you mind telling me what happened?" Joe now simply looked concerned for her happiness.

Iris shrugged. "We just can't see eye to eye on some things."

Her father raised an eyebrow at her, silently disapproving of such a vague reason. "Honey, you know I talk to Eddie all day. It's going to come up. This is your chance to get your side in first."

Iris heaved a sigh. "He's too threatened by Barry. How close we are. My feelings for him…" her voice trailed away into nothing.

Both of Joe's eyebrows went up now. He cleared his throat, treading carefully. "What do you mean, feelings for Barry?" She stared at the window, not ready to actually put words on it. His jaw dropped too. "Do you…do you have feelings for him?"

Iris drew a pattern on her sheet, giving it an inordinate amount of attention. "I'm still figuring it out. Don't you dare say anything to Barry."

It was a good thing Iris wasn't looking at him. Joe couldn't hide the comical look that spread across his face, but he nodded instantly. "Of course, baby. Of course." He gave her a hug. "I'm sorry things ended with Eddie, but I think there's something better for you out there. You know you're welcome here as long as you like."

Iris hugged him back, and then dropped her bomb. "I'm going apartment hunting today."

Joe couldn't quite hide his disappointment, but he nodded and didn't argue. It would be hard to hide Barry's secret from her if she were here full time anyway.

Once he had left the room and closed the door, Joe leaned back on the wall for a minute. He'd often suspected that Iris might have feelings for Barry too. He'd been waiting years for Barry to tell her how he felt. Or for Iris to acknowledge her feelings at all. Now he was the only one aware of both sides. Maybe this was his punishment for being a natural secret keeper. Well played, universe.

He shook his head and headed to work. These kids would be the death of him yet.

Once Iris got up and ready, she went looking for an apartment of her own. She was making better money than she had at Jitters. She wanted to have her own space. And she needed a bit of distance from the drama that was her feelings for Barry. Living on her own would do that for her.

Once she found a small but nice apartment in a good neighborhood that she could afford, she went back to her and Eddie's apartment and began packing. Luckily he was at work, so she did much of it by herself. She headed back to her father's house before Eddie got off work so she wouldn't have to be there. She started dinner and waited for Joe and Barry to make it home.

The longer she waited, the more she began to feel the weight of the breakup. Her life was changing, and she still wasn't sure if it was for the better. She was going to miss Eddie. She missed Barry. And she still didn't know what to do about him. Tears were starting and she didn't bother to hold them back since no one else was home.

Just her luck, Barry meandered in the front door. He looked ridiculously cheery until he spotted her on the couch, hurriedly wiping her face. His giant smile collapsed.

"Iris." He was next to her on the couch immediately. "Do you want to talk?"

She shook her head. Barry looked at her, trying to decide what to do. Finally he realized what she needed. It took him a moment because it had always been what he needed. But Iris processed things differently. She usually liked to talk things out. Since she didn't right now, he realized she just needed companionship. He brought her a blanket with a small smile, draped it over her, and then sat down. He braced his lanky legs on the coffee table and got comfortable next to her.

Silence settled over them, but it wasn't awkward. Barry expected nothing from her, simply lending support as she had done for him. In spite of her distress, Iris couldn't help a wry smile. How was she supposed to be comforted by the guy causing half of her problems? She looked at his profile and instantly realized how: Easily.

It was Barry, and he was here for her just like she had been for him. She wasn't sure if it was that realization or the breakup, but the tears started to flow. She leaned her head on Barry's shoulder and let them fall. He let her lean on him, practically radiating warmth and comfort. After several minutes he reached his hand up to touch the side of her head. His voice was very low, but she could still hear it.

"It's going to be okay."

She didn't know why, but it made her feel better. For a few minutes she really believed him. She nodded, wiping her eyes with a corner of the blanket. She took comfort from his presence and left it at that.

The timer in the kitchen went off, and Barry got up to check on dinner as Joe came in the front door.

Later that evening, when Iris had her emotions under control, she asked Barry why he had been so happy coming in the door. She needed some cheerful news.

Barry's smile came back. "I had a great visit with my dad. It felt really good."

Iris smiled for the first time that evening. "That's great, Barry. What did you talk about?"

Barry opened his mouth, closed it, and then finally replied. "I just told him all about some old comic books I'd read. He gets so bored in there. But we laughed a lot. It felt good."

Iris nodded. "That's wonderful, I'm so glad for you two."

Both lapsed into silence, but this time there was an element of discomfort. Each knew they had things they weren't sharing, which was so different from their past friendship. Each was disturbed by it, but unable to do anything to fix it.

Iris took the next day off so she could move. Barry and Joe did the same. Eddie did as well, but it might have been better if he hadn't. He could barely look at any of them. The tension was palpable. All three did their best to get it over with as quickly and painlessly as possible. Eddie helped some. Finally they had the rental van loaded and ready to go.

Joe was in the driver's seat. Barry was in the middle. Iris got into the passenger side and closed the door, then rolled down the window as Eddie approached. He looked like he hadn't slept much. Barry and Joe looked out the opposite window, trying to be as invisible as possible. Eddie managed to make his mouth turn up a little in an attempted smile. Iris did the same. Eddie stepped closer, put out a finger, and pointed at the necklace Iris was wearing. The replica of her mother's wedding ring. Iris looked down at it, then back up to Eddie's eyes. He looked like a mournful blue-eyed basset hound. But she could still see the caring in his gaze as his finger moved from the necklace to her heart, and then to Barry. Joe and Barry were still purposely staring away, which was good. Eddie gave her a look of sad encouragement. Iris nodded and leaned out the window to kiss him on the cheek.

"Goodbye Eddie."

"Good luck, Iris."

As they pulled away Iris stared straight out the window, trying to keep tears at bay. She didn't want to see the lone figure still standing in the rearview mirror, and she didn't want to think too much about the man sitting next to her either. Barry leaned slightly closer, providing his shoulder once more. She put her head on it with a grateful sigh and stayed that way until they pulled up to her new place.

After a painstaking check of each lock and window, Joe gave the apartment his seal of approval. Barry found himself wishing Iris knew about his speed. It would be so much easier to unpack all her stuff. Especially the clothes. Iris had a lot of clothes. He stealthily used his speed to hang up most of her skirts and dresses until Joe busted him and gave him a threatening look.

They spent the day unpacking the basics and setting up her new home. By the end of several hours they were all exhausted and ordered in pizza.

They ate on the floor, straight out of the box. By his fifth piece Barry was laying on his back, slowly chewing and swallowing so he didn't choke. Iris laughed and poked him in the belly, causing him to jackknife and actually choke. When he finally cleared his airway and could breathe again, Barry's look promised retribution. But Iris was laughing so hard and he was so happy to see it that he let it go. Her laughter was contagious, and soon he was laughing too. Joe was shaking his head as he leaned against the wall, wearing the same expression he had worn through much of their teenage years.

By late evening Iris was ready to call it a night, Joe headed home, and Barry set out for S.T.A.R. Labs.

He arrived in time to see his team getting ready to go home, but they were still glad to see him. As Cisco and Caitlin were shutting down computers and finishing up Dr. Wells wheeled over to Barry. Harrison's eyes were almost boring into Barry's his look was so intense.

"Barry, may I have a word?"

"Sure." Barry stepped into the next room to give them some privacy.

Harrison put his fingers together, forming a steeple. "Barry. It's been almost two weeks since you were out sick, and you still haven't gotten back up to the speed you were before. We can't find any physical cause. I'm starting to get a little worried."

Barry rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, I just…I haven't been able to focus lately. There's so much going on."

Harrison's eyes narrowed. "So this is more of a mental issue? I thought so. You've been a little…removed. What's been going on?"

Barry stared at him as memories of a different timeline and all the pain and guilt that went with it came sweeping in. He shook it off. "Nothing major. Just…my dad, and Iris and…different things. I'll try to focus more, I'll get better."

Harrison looked at him a moment as he removed his glasses. "Need I remind you that you need all the speed you can get so you're ready to meet the Reverse Flash again?" His blue eyes were piercing.

Memories of the man in yellow surfaced. They'd had several altercations now, and Barry still wasn't sure if he was as fast or faster. Barry could sense the heavy importance. This meant a lot to Dr. Wells. He nodded. "I know. I've just been off my game. I'll get back on, I promise."

"I hope so. There's a lot riding on this. See you tomorrow." Harrison replaced his glasses and wheeled out, calling a goodbye to the others.

Barry leaned against a nearby desk and rubbed his face, blowing out a breath. He had way too many things going on for one person to handle. Too many secrets. Too many problems.

Cisco peeked in. "Hey Barry, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure."

Cisco threw a glance back toward Caitlin, making sure she was occupied. He took several steps closer, so he could speak in a lowered tone. "Look man, I know something happened a while ago and you don't really want to talk about it. And I can see you're doing better and I'm glad. But some things aren't adding up, and it's driving me crazy."

Barry's brows knitted together. "What things?"

Cisco looked back again. "I cleaned up your suit before anyone else saw it, but I took some samples first. Mind telling me why there are two types of blood on your suit?" Barry stared at him, mute. Cisco kept going. "And, it's pretty obvious to me by now that you used those cold grenades I made you for something else besides training. You had frost damage on the back." Barry continued to just look at him. "Fire discoloration on one side?" Cisco waited, hoping for a response, then looked behind him again. He leaned even closer. "What I don't get is what you were doing to get that kind of stuff on the suit like that in just one night? There aren't any reports of fire or dust storms or even heavy wind that night. What were you up to?"

Barry rubbed his eyes, trying to decide how much to tell him. He was getting tired of keeping it bottled up, and he was tired of constantly keeping secrets. He couldn't even tell his own father about it without resorting to code. It was exhausting. But the more he stared at Cisco the more he realized that Cisco wasn't the person he truly wanted to talk to.

He wanted to tell Iris about the Flash. He wanted to have no secrets between them again.

Cisco had been waiting for Barry to reply. When he didn't, he heaved a sigh. "Really wish you'd talk to me, dude. That's what friends do." He didn't bother to hide his sarcasm. He turned to leave.

Barry grabbed his shoulder. "Cisco, I'm sorry. Just give me a little more time. I need to figure some things out. Okay?"

Cisco looked at him, deliberating. Finally he shrugged. "I guess."

"Thanks. I really mean it." Barry tried his best to make it sound like it.

Cisco gave him his best threatening look, which wasn't all that threatening. "This better be one hell of a story, man."

Barry smiled in spite of himself. "You have no idea."

Cisco narrowed his eyes and headed out. Caitlin had her coat and purse and waved as she walked past. Barry waved back.

When they had left, he put on his suit and went for a run.

Barry ran to the high mountain he'd taken Iris to on their last day before the accelerator explosion. Memories of their last conversation and the love he felt for her came back full force. He stood alone in the same place they had talked, cried, and kissed. He let the memories roll over him.

Ever since his return to this timeline, Barry had done his best not to spend much time dwelling on the memories of Iris from the other one. Sometimes he dreamed them, sometimes they bubbled up to the surface while his guard was down. Sometimes a word or a look or just the way she smiled brought something back. But it was painful, and he avoided them the moment they came up. He knew she was happy with Eddie, and he wasn't going to ruin that for her. Besides, she had made it clear she didn't love him like that in this timeline. He'd been determined to let go of Iris as his fiancée.

Even now that she and Eddie had split, Barry was pretty sure that she wasn't going to come chasing after him any time soon. He was going to have to deal with that. He would let go of that dream, even if it killed him a little inside.

But the dream he couldn't let go of was Iris in his life as his best friend. The one he told everything to. The one who knew him better than anyone else did. Truthfully, they hadn't felt like that since he awakened out of the coma with super speed. Keeping her in the dark about the Flash and now his time travel was putting a huge chasm between them. He wondered if she'd sensed it and that was why she wasn't telling him things now.

If he couldn't have Iris as the love of his life, he needed her as his best friend. His true best friend. And that meant one thing:

He needed to tell her the truth about the Flash.

It was a huge risk. He knew she was going to be angry and hurt. It might just kill their friendship entirely. But the alternative was watching their relationship die a slow death because they were no longer close enough to share everything.

He gave some thought to Joe's concerns. Truthfully, Iris had been in plenty of danger without knowing he was the Flash. He wasn't sure it was going to make a difference in the long run. Going against a specific request from Joe was something he rarely did nowadays, especially when it came to something this big.

But if time travel had taught him anything, it was to make the most of the life you were given.

Barry had already lost his parents and his fiancée. He wasn't going to lose his best friend too.