Summary: In an effort to fix a future with no positive out comes, he goes back in time. Nothing goes right from the start, but as far as he's concerned, that's the story of his life. Now? Now he's not going to take anyone's shit, not even if it's huge red and fluffy.
Warnings: Blood and Gore, excessive cussing and name calling
Pairings: None so far, but always a chance of slash
P.S.:So Merry Christmas all! Hope everyone is or has had a great time! Here's the next chapter, sorry for with-holding it for a while, but it had to be done! Anyways, I hope you all enjoy and wont hate me after this chapter...
Blood Stained Jester
Ciel Leon
Dancing Bones
When he woke, it was to the feeling of complete disorientation, nausea and confusion.
He was soaked.
His clothes, his sandals, his hair were all completely drenched in addition to the fact that the humidity in the air caused his clothes to cling to his body uncomfortably.
Where the fuck was he?
Irritably forcing his body into a sitting position, the man regarded his surroundings with disdain.
A sewer, a humid, wet, disgusting sewer that had ruined his clothing and shoes and caused him to desire little more than to spend the rest of his life in a hot spring in order to wash away the filth he had been laying in.
Fuck.
This wasn't supposed to happen.
Heaving himself to his feet the man observed his surroundings with fury in his eyes after roughly flinging a strand of wet hair (where the fuck was his hot bath goddammit) out of his face.
Alright, sewer.
Snake-Pedo's lair maybe? The one in Konoha or the one in Sound? Konoha's sewer systems? (Why the hell would he be there of all places)
Shit, he had no idea where the flying-fuck he was.
Releasing a barely audible sigh, he turned to look behind him, before his brow furrowed in slight agitation.
He was standing in the middle of what appeared to be one of the main drainage parts of the sewer, and there was no junction in the vicinity, leaving him with only two options. Forwards or Backwards.
He blinked, refrained from rolling his eyes, turned on his heel and went backwards down the tunnel.
It took an hour according to his internal clock to reach a junction, where he simply turned onto the new path, ignoring the original tunnel he had been following.
A hot burst of air followed by a low rumble interrupted his silent march, the water around his feet producing large ripples due to the noise even as the foundations shook, causing small pieces of rubble to fall from the ceiling and bounce off walls.
He didn't even pause, continuing further down the tunnel, interest oddly piqued despite everything else (including this horrendous situation).
As he progressed, the rumbling became continuous as well as louder, and the wave of heat he had felt earlier become constant before increasing in temperature so much he began to sweat slightly.
"You would dare intrude on my domain human!"
He reached another junction, stopping this time to listen.
Why was he being this moronic again?
"Pathetic ant, come closer and let me rip you to shreds, let me taste some blood once again, I'll keep you alive and screaming, fresh for a good meal before I eat you alive."
The voice was rough, vicious and husky despite its booming quality that caused the walls to shake and rippling water to create small waves that crashed against the walls and his exposed ankles.
He just wanted out of this place, a shower, and good Intel for god's sake! Was that too much to ask for!
Identifying the origin of the vocalizations took a moment of calculation before he was on his way, having taken a right that lead him down the most recently discovered path.
"What a stupid maggot, searching for death, yes, I will grant this wish of yours, come closer, yes, despite being such a small snack you will taste delicious."
It took several minutes of his journey down the hall before he began to notice slight changes, the ceiling was slowly increasing in height and the tunnel was slowly widening until suddenly he was in an open chamber and facing a seemingly endless expanse of vertical metal bars, only interrupted by a white squarish item placed in the center of the jail cell he was facing.
It was this, as well as the shockingly large white eyes and red cat-like pupils caused him to freeze.
"The Kyuubi no Kitsune."
It was hard to get those words from his throat considering the waves of emotion crashing through him at the time, but he did manage to get them out into the open air without stammering or choking or something equally ridiculous as well as managing to withhold any emotion from his voice.
The creature cackled loudly. Eyes narrowed in obvious pleasure as it crowed, "And my meal has come to the plate!"
He blinked, cocking his head to the side.
"It's foolish to say such a thing when I'm completely out of your reach baka -Kitsune"
With a wordless roar of indignation, the demon shot it's fore-paw at him through one of the gaps of the cells bars.
The paw landed with a crash in front of him, within arm's reach, but still not close enough to grab him.
"Mah, do you want to try again fuzz-it? I promise not to move."
The demon only snarled in response, reluctantly withdrawing its massive paw back into its cell.
Observing the demonic creature before him, the man let out an almost inaudible sigh before reluctantly sitting on the ground in front of the beast, if he was in front of the Kyuubi, then something had definitely gone wrong with the damn ritual, now he just had to figure out what it was.
He had procured all the materials necessary, the skull belonged to his sibling, his own blood was used, and the scroll-
He blinked before frowning.
The scroll had been created by Naruto Uzumaki himself, the last seal master in the elemental countries but the blond had said that-
Said that certain seals could only be performed correctly by the seal maker themselves.
Shit.
Well, that might at the very least explain why the fuck he wasn't in his own body, which was what was supposed to have happened, the damn seal must have placed him in Morons body, but why wasn't he in control of it?
Must be because he didn't belong here in the first place.
Huffing, he looked up towards the still infuriated Furry.
"Looks like were stuck together fur ball."
"What nonsense are you speaking runt? Leave my domain at once, foolish human!"
"Wish I could you overgrown kitten, but it seems I'm stuck here due to a faulty seal, I'm afraid were trapped in this Moron together."
"Who are you to call my vessel a Moron! He has not even aged to a month!"
"Look, fuzz-it, he's loud, obnoxious, happy-go-lucky and worst of all unpredictable. I can tell you right now that unless we change that he'll be an annoyance until the day he causes all three of our deaths."
The demon grumbled in barely restrained fury, eyes narrowed and hostile.
"Leave."
"Can't."
"Bygone heathen."
"Get a grip foxy."
"Die."
"Technically already dead."
"Huh?"
"Ritual that brought me here should have incinerated my body into miniscule ashes after the transfer. Technically already dead, try again."
"Fuck you human."
"I'm not all that into bestiality thank you, move along."
The creature huffed, slightly amused.
"Very well human, what do you call yourself?"
"Itachi, Itachi Uchiha."