Maple Leaf: The Third Dare! Scourge, here's some catnip cookies!
Scourge: Is it legal for someone my age to get high?
Maple: Since when did you care about rules?
Scourge: …good point.
Brambleclaw: Something tells me this will end badly.
Maple: Good hypothesis. Jayfeather?
Jayfeather: Mm…first, he'll humiliate himself, and then he'll crash.
Maple: Precisely! Let's do it to it!
The day after the dog dare, Scourge was napping in a beam of sunlight. His glossy black fur seemed to shimmer in its light, his white paw nearly glowing. For once, he looked peaceful.
That was before two kits suddenly pounced on his back, jolting him awake. His ice-blue eyes snapped open as he yowled in surprise.
"Wha?!" he exclaimed, standing up abruptly.
"Flower! Mustard!" Concrete exclaimed, running into the alley with a bundle of lavender flowers and tangy, green leaves. She was resisting the urge to swallow.
'That would ruin the prank,' she thought 'We're supposed to be embarrassing Scourge, not myself!'
"You know Scourge doesn't like to be woken up while he's taking a cat nap!"
"What else would I be taking?! A dog nap? A bear nap?" Scourge hissed. Then he sniffed the air. "Mmm…what's that smell?"
"Catnip; a key role in your next dare." Concrete said, placing the mound a few feet away from the tom. "Lakestorm, a new member of BloodClan, has learned about your Dare Challenge. So she wants you to eat a couple of mounds of catnip, and we'll see what happens."
"Concrete!" a voice exclaimed. A few seconds later, a grayish-blue cat with darker blue stripes ran down the hall. She had bright blue eyes, and a teardrop symbol on her chest. "You left the other two mounds of catnip!"
"Scourge, this is Lakestorm." Concrete introduced, placing the other two bundles on the ground next to the first.
"Hello."
"H-Hi."
"So, I just eat this, right? Hm…I guess nothing bad could happen…right?"
"Not that I can think of, unless you jumped off a bridge or something."
"Alright. Give that to me." Concrete used her paws to push the mounds towards him.
"Lakestorm and concrete set video cameras all over the territory, so you'll be on-video the whole time." Flower said. Scourge just took a deep whiff of the catnip and smiled a little.
"It smells so good…!" he purred, rolling around in it. All the other cats just watched, holding cameras.
"Ooh, this is gonna be good!" Concrete murmured. Soon Scourge rolled onto his stomach and ate all three mounds of catnip. Almost immediately he jumped up and ran out the den, with the others running after him.
They found Scourge sneaking up on Bone, who was eating a chicken leg, spy-style. He was pressed against the wall, then rolled across the alley to the other side. Soon, he was creeping up right behind the cat, downwind so Bone couldn't smell him.
"Bazinga!" he shouted in his ear.
"Ah!" Bone exclaimed, turning around. "Scourge? Why is there foaming spit around your mouth? And why do you smell like catnip?"
"Because it's pretty…!"
"Uh…yeah, purple petals are very pretty."
"Adios!" Scourge then ran away, farther down the alley. Bone just watched as Flower, Mustard, and Lakestorm raced past him with cameras.
"What's up with Scourge? Is he drunk?" Bone asked Concrete.
"…sorta. Lakestorm dared him to eat three whole mounds of catnip. So he's essentially drunk for about another hour or so."
"…I've gotta see this!" Bone and Concrete then went after Scourge and the kits…and Lakestorm, who was acting like a kit.
They found Mustard on the ground, talking to Brick. When Bone asked, she said she hadn't seen Scourge all day. Suddenly—
"Banzai!" a voice exclaimed. Then a large black mass fell on Brick, pinning the reddish she-cat to the ground."I caught her!"
"Scourge, what the heck?!" Brick snapped.
"He's drunk, Brick." Mustard stated "Please forgive him."
"…why don't you go scare someone else, Scourge?"
"Okay!" Scourge obediently ran off again, with everyone else following him.
Once again, Scourge was on top of a building, this time with a giant water balloon in his jaws. Two cats—Mischievous and another black cat named Lucky—were walking below him. It was obvious that they were on a date.
Right when the couple was below him, Scourge dropped the balloon. It jiggled around a bit as it plummeted—and it fell right on Lucky.
"Eek! This is just perfect! I should really try dying my fur brown or something—maybe then I'd get some luck!" thshe exclaimed. Then she glared at Mischievous, who was just staring in shock, with piercing green eyes. "Did you do this?!"
"What?! Why did you assume it was me?!" he asked in surprise.
"You're the only one in the clan with any sort of access to bright red water balloons!" Lucky peeled a flimsy shard of red plastic off of her pelt.
"No I'm not! Scourge has a bunch, too!"
"Don't pin this on the Clan Leader! Why would he want to do this?!"
"Banzai!" Scourge exclaimed, leaping down from the building and landing in front of the two. "Gotchya! Haha! Sayonara, suckers!" then he ran off. Concrete gave Flower and Mustard a few squared of cloth to use as parachutes while the other four cats jumped off the building to go after Scourge.
"It wasn't Mischievous!" Flower exclaimed as she floated down "It was Scourge!"
"We've got it on video!" Mustard added before the two ran off after the adults. Mischievous and Lucky just stared at each other—then started to laugh hysterically.
Scourge proceeded to do a lot more crazy things, such as reciting movie lines—
The black cat bent over a small puddle in the alley and lapped from it.
"Mm, this water tastes kinda—salty!" he exclaimed before laughing like an idiot and running off.
-using book quotes—
"What's the matter?" Scourge said, landing in front of one of his unexpecting warriors. By now his whole muzzle was covered in foam, so the tom was pretty freaked out by the appearance of his leader "Afraid I'm gonna give you some medicine?"
-rolling around randomly—
"He's been doing this for the past five minutes." Bone said, watching from a distance as Scourge rolled around on the pavement, purring loudly and his icy-blue eyes just tiny slits.
"He's gonna have to stop soon." Concrete assured.
"There he goes again!" Lakestorm said as Scourge got up and ran off—again.
-chasing imaginary prey—
"I caught it!" Scourge exclaimed as he leaped onto an empty spot of grass. He licked his lips and ate a mouthful of grass and dirt "Ick, where'd my mouse go?! Oh, there's another one!" the black cat had been pouncing on random patches of grass, saying something about a rabbit of a bird or a mouse before eating a mouthful of dirt.
-and staggering around like he was drunk.
"Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around, ninety-one bottles of beer on the wall…" Scourge moaned as he stumbled back to his tire. He was about five paces away from it when he fell to the floor, snoring.
"Scourge looks so cute when he's sleeping!" Concrete cooed. Everyone else gagged.
"If you say so…" Flower muttered, while Mustard pretended to puke.
"He skipped a few numbers." Lakestorm and Brick stated.
"That's how bar fight's start. Everybody starts arguing about which number comes next, but they're all wrong, since they're drunk. Then bottles get thrown and people get knocked out." Bone said.
"You've been in a bar fight?!" the kits squeaked.
"No! But that's what all the cats who escaped before it happened always told me."
Jayfeather: Wake up, you lazy cat! *nudges Scourge for the fiftieth time*
Scourge: Zzz…..
Maple Leaf: Well, he crashed, as promised!
Brambleclaw: This was entertaining to watch!
Maple: It sure was! And, since I've already finished the next dare on my iPod, and there's no mas volleyball tryouts, then I'll probably get NAUGHTY CATS up by sometime next week.
Brambleclaw: *Looks at Jayfeather still trying to wake up Scourge* Okay, well the author doesn't own me, Jayfeather, Scourge, or BloodClan. But she does own Concrete, Flower, Mustard, and Lucky. Lakestorm was inspired by the reviewer…and Maple Leaf isn't in this story, but she'll probably be the announcer if she decides to start the Ask the Warriors Show thing she's been thinking about.
Leaf: Correcto! Goodnight, everyone! Bye!
Brambleclaw: Adios!