Ralph had an expression of extreme anger on his face. I had an expression of extreme fear on mine. I thought that he was certainly going to kill me.

"Sorry about that," Said Ralph, as he got off of me. His expression changed to one of condolence. "It was just a precaution."

I adjusted my neck as I got up from the ground. "What do you mean, 'precaution'?"

"Just in case you were someone less than friendly. I'm really sorry about it."

"It's okay...wait...HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE? WHY WAS FELIX HERE? WHY IS THERE A MESSAGE IN MY TYPEWRITER? DID YOU KILL RICHARD? WHY DOES IT SMELL WEIRD IN HERE?"

"Slow the hack down! I can explain everything!"

"Okay, oka...wait, what did you say?"

"I said 'hack', its like when a human says heck. Some characters even say 'mod' or 'moderator'. They are cuss words for video game characters."

I calmed down and then sighed. "...Alright, but do you care to sit down?"

"Not really, I break most chairs and since we are both on the floor, I find that there is no reason to move."

I positioned myself into the lotus position (at least I tried to. I haven't played WiiFit in a while) and prepared myself to listen to Ralph's account of last night.

"After I left the studio, I walked through the prop warehouse to my dressing room. I sat there for a good hour, contemplating. I then found a piece of paper and a pen and started writing."

"What did you do, write a love letter?" I asked.

"Huh?" Said Ralph, who was obviously confused "Anyway, I stared writing a suicide note"

"May I see it?" I asked Ralph.

He gave me the note. It detailed the emotions he felt after the party, authorization of his will after his death, and requested that Richard Morning should visit Vanellope to comfort her.

"Can I keep this? It may be important." I asked. Ralph nodded and I put the paper in my pocket. "So... why did you want to kill yourself?"

"To show the other characters how important I was to the game. Killing myself would mean that Felix would have no reason to fix things. An old Bad-anon affirmation is 'Without me, there would be no heroes.'"

"Mm, I've heard about this Bad-anon group. What do you exactly do there?"

"We talk about each other's woes when it comes to being a bad guy. Clyde, the orange ghost from Pac-Man, runs the group."

"Oh...so after you wrote the letter, what did you do next?"

"I went to the director's office. I knew he had a gun in one of his drawers and I intended to dispose myself with it. I was about to pull the trigger when I heard someone scream. 'Oh my god! Someone has shot the director!' I put the gun down and left the studio, knowing quite well that the finger was to be pointed at me."

"Where did you go?"

"I decided to run to where your place was located, and I hid in the dumpster behind the building. In the morning, I carefully climbed up the building and entered it. I found your office and tried to enter it. I tried the door, but it was locked. I was going to break the door down, but I felt something under your doormat. I lifted it up the mat and found a secret flap that contained a key. I used it in the lock, put back the key and entered."

"So why was Fix-It Felix here?"

"I'm getting there. Once I entered, I accidentally broke a few things."

"Such as?"

"Uh... your door, a side table, a chair, your refrigerator..."

"MY REFRIDGERATOR? HOW DID YOU BREAK THAT?"

"The door came off!"

"Oh..." I said, sorrowfully. The door had been weakening and I did not want to repair it yet. "...why were you in my fridge?"

"I happen to have a unique smell. I had to find some other smelly things to cover it up."

"I see... I think I smelled you at the party last night. It made my ears sting."

"I get that a lot... where were we again?"

"Austral... I mean the fridge."

"Ah, so I got a few smelly things out and laid them around the room, I also lit a few cigarettes that I found. I then found a piece of paper and started using the typewriter."

"How did you use the typewriter with those big hands of yours?"

"I found a pair of chopsticks and used them to type. I then called Fix-It Felix to repair the damage I made. I disguised my voice and said that I had a cough so Felix wouldn't recognize me. I then hid in the closet until you came by."

"And that's it?" I asked. Ralph nodded in agreement, yet he had a sad look on his face. "Well, you're innocent in my eyes, yet Thomas Weston is all out to destroy you."

"Thomas who?"

"Thomas Weston. He's a different private investigator who was hired by Mr. Empura. He plans on executing you with a substance he created called The Goo. He wants to erase you."

"Great... just what I need to have breathing down my back."

"Don't worry Ralph, all I need to do is investigate and find a few suspects."

"Like THAT made me feel better."

Just then, I heard the screeching of car tires from outside. I looked out of my window and I saw a black van park. The doors opened and Ty and Ryan exited.

"Why are they here?!" I shouted.

"Remember that smell I told you about? It lingers where ever I go."

I sighed and then started to push Ralph out of my office. "Ralph! You need to get out of here!" I yelled. It was a hopeless endeavor; Ralph had a low center of gravity.

"Why are you trying to ditch me?"

"Thomas's two associates are entering the building!"

"I'll hide in the closet again!"

"They will most likely check the closet! Leave the way you came!"

"They will most likely see me climbing down the side! Hide me!"

"I am not working for another game character again! Get out!"

"I call you for help and all you care about is your next swig! You are supposed to be a good guy but you are just like the Nicelanders. You only care about yourself and your interests!"

I smacked Ralph and he looked at me in amazement. He did the same to me (look at me, not slap. His slap would have most likely killed me). He was right, I only cared about myself. I didn't really care for anything after my brother's death. Not even Paula...Paula!

"Ralph, I have an Idea!" I exclaimed as I went to my desk.

-[+]-

Ty and Ryan entered my office. They were holding revolvers in their hands, most likely trigger happy.

"Alright Ryan, you look around while question martin."

Ty went to the closet and found it to be empty. He then started looking in other places.

Ryan saw me and walked up. "Hello there Martin..."