Title: Who is Remus Lupin?

Warnings: Magical AU.

Rating: M

Artwork: Sirius x Remus ID by Sirius-x-Remus

A/N: This chapter is so overdue but I'm back with the finale and also with quite a few plot bunnies that will show up in the next few weeks as new shorts. As usual, it's unbeta-ed chapter but I will give it a reread after its posted and fix things up. Enjoy!

'It's okay. Don't look. Don't look,' Sirius whispered again and again, holding Remus's trembling frame tightly to his chest. 'It's okay. It's okay,' he assured, as Remus pressed his face further and further into his neck and his hands fisted the back of Sirius's shirt as if he was afraid of falling. 'Just don't look and it will be all right.'

From the corner of his eyes, he could see James fidgeting with his wand in his pocket and trying to blend into the crowd that was slowly gathering around the burning house. He kept glancing back to where he knew Remus and Sirius were standing, hidden under the Invisibility cloak, as if coaxing them for instructions to leave. Muggle reinforcements would be coming soon and while the cloak made them invisible, it did not make them any less solid. It would certainly make James's job as their guard more difficult.

'Remus, I'm going to apparate us out of here now,' Sirius whispered gently, his hands rubbing Remus's arms up and down comfortingly. 'We can't stay here any longer.'

He felt Remus shake his head against him, arms tightening in reluctance to leave. 'This was my home, Sirius,' he said softly, his voice trembling as if just holding back tears. 'This was the first place I could ever call home and look what I've done to it.' He gazed back for the first time since Sirius had convinced him to disable all the protective wards one by one, so that fire could be set to it. 'Alphard was right; he had predicted that cooperating with Dumbledore would ruin us but I never listened. And now, he's dead and I am committing treason against everything he ever believed in by setting his home on fire and still handing the Wolfsbane over to the Order.' His eyes shifted to hold Sirius's, amber eyes burning as brightly as the flames behind them. 'What sort of traitorous bastard am I?' He asked shaking with anger, his hands falling away from Sirius to form tight fists at his side. 'What sort of ungrateful monster am I?'

Unsure of whether Remus wanted to be touched or not in his vulnerable position, Sirius allowed his arms to lay limp at his sides. 'The sort of bastard who is giving up everything to save many, many lives,' he said, his voice so gentle, he wondered if it was really him speaking. He tried to grin as he always did to lighten the mood, but knew his lips formed a grimace as he noticed James pace the perimeters of the house again. 'If we didn't do this, they would find a way to get their hands on the Wolfsbane one way or the other. You saw what Reggie wrote - even though we moved the research, they were planning to scour the house for ingredients and clues to put the pieces together.'

Remus closed his eyes, as if trying to convince himself of Sirius's reasoning while the young Black waited more patiently than he felt, more out of love for the werewolf than sympathy. Years of sacrificing every bit of himself for his family had left Sirius almost apathetic and uncomprehending of certain situations. 'Do you think Alphard would ever forgive me?' The sandy blonde asked him softly as his breath came out in short, shallow bursts.

Jealousy shot through Sirius as it always did when Remus mentioned Alphard, but he pushed it down forcefully. Sighing deeply, he pushed sandy hair out of amber eyes and kissed the boy's forehead softly. 'I can't give you that answer, Remus.' He knew it wasn't the answer Remus wanted but Sirius did not want to lie, not anymore. 'The forgiveness of the dead have no value in the land of the living.' He wrapped his arms back around the werewolf, hesitantly, unsure whether he was allowed.

Remus did not resist, tawny head settling on broad shoulders and warm breath wafting against the black haired boy's neck. 'Let's go,' he said resignedly and Sirius heaved a sigh of relief, tapping against the mirror in his pocket twice as a signal for James to clear off as well.

Before he disapparated, Sirius noticed an older man and a woman pushing through the crowd to make their way to the house. It was odd how Sirius's grey eyes were drawn to them amongst the large throng of panicked people, but something about the man's wild tawny hair as he fought the muggle police to get into the premises and the woman's teary amber eyes as she screamed had rung familiar to him. But before he could contemplate it any further, the scenery changed and he found himself in front of the Potter house again, being ushered by Lily Potter for a cup of warm tea and a thick bar of chocolate to calm Remus's shaky hands.

'Go on in,' Sirius urged, once the vault door had opened. 'All this as much yours as it is mine.' He pushed Remus into his Gringotts vault gently, whistling as he followed. Sirius had never been short of gold before, but now with the combined weight of his own and Alphard's considerable fortune, the vault looked nearly illegal.

When he and Regulus had devised a loop hole in the system, Sirius did not think it to be ingenious. It was elementary really; by law, Remus was not allowed to inherit Alphard's wealth and so it transferred to his uncle's next of kin – his sister, Walburga Black. However, arrogance had made Walburga short sighted and she had by passed the fact that pureblood patriarchy dictated that she, as a woman, had as much right to Alphard's fortune as Remus Lupin, the werewolf. Consequently, as heir, it meant that Sirius had inherited back everything that was Remus's to begin with perfectly legally. His mother had no means of accessing it without breaking into Gringotts herself, though Sirius was sure it would not keep her from trying. She had probably not fathomed the consequences of her zeal when Regulus was pushing for the lawyers to strip Lupin of his inheritance under Sirius's instructions. He would have loved to see her face when realisation sunk in far too late. The very idea of it made his face split into a grin.

'Are you sure it will be safe here?' Remus asked unsurely, as he placed the shrunken notebooks and scrolls full of his and Alphard's research at the very corner of the vault. His amber eyes shot back sternly when the goblin accompanying them scoffed at his question. 'No one in your family had access to the vault, you're sure of it?' he asked again, piling gold galleons on top of his research to hide it in the same potion Sirius had watched Remus pot plants in the garden. 'This cannot get into the wrong hands.'

'It's safe,' Sirius assured with a smile. 'I promise.' He surveyed the gold surrounding them again with awe that didn't seem to be leaving him any time soon. 'Listen, these past few days have been challenging for us, to say the least. And there is every possibility that it's not going to get any easier. But we're here now and we should enjoy the fact that we're here, that we have each other.'

Remus looked back at him, eyebrows raised. 'Are you asking me out on a date?'

Sirius grinned weakly. 'Are you saying no?'

Remus shook his head as he stood up, brushing the creases off his clothes. 'I've never been on a date before,' he admitted, his cheeks colouring attractively.

'What, Alphard never took you out to dinner?' Sirius asked, the derisiveness in his tone masking the constant jealousy that he felt for his uncle. The answering silence that followed was the only indication that he had gone too far. Sirius closed his eyes and sighed. 'I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that,' he apologised, feeling worse when he noticed that Remus's face had turned pale again, the smile he'd been sporting only moments ago now a thin, straight line. 'I didn't mean anything by it.'

'There are days when I regret it, you know,' Remus said softly, looking down at his shoes as one arm crossed over the other protectively. 'Loving Alphard. I know it's a horrible thing to say.' He pulled the sleeves of his plaid shirt where they had been folded to the elbow. 'But the more I stay with you, the more I realise how little he gave a fuck about me.' He kicked the small pile of gold nearest to him angrily. 'The most pathetic part of all this is, I didn't know any better. Until now, until you, I didn't even know what being loved looked like.' He laughed humourlessly.

'Better late than never,' Sirius replied stupidly from the lack of anything better to say.

It had the desired effect however, because Remus's expression instantly lifted and this time, his laughter was genuine. 'Better late than never,' he agreed, amber eyes shining as he shook his head hopelessly. He walked up to Sirius and pulled him into a hug. 'Thank you, Sirius,' he whispered into his ear before pulling away.

'For what?' Sirius asked, dumbly, wishing the hug would last a little longer. From the corner of his eye, he could see their goblin in charge of their account fidget restlessly, obviously annoyed by the delay. He felt he should be embarrassed about the public displays of affection they were showing or the sudden drama they had caused within the vault, but he found it hard to think beyond the crookedness of Remus's teeth and the little smile lines that collected in the corner of Remus's eyes. Fuck, he was smitten.

'For the date,' Remus replied cheekily with a wink.

Sirius laughed. 'Why don't you go on ahead?' he suggested. 'I'm going to stock up on some gold. Something tells me winning you over isn't going to come cheap.' He ruffled Remus's tawny hair as the boy climbed out of the vault, feeling regrettably foolish. He had wanted to kiss the boy, or perhaps pull him into another hug, or even dare something as cheeky as a slap on his rather fine arse; yet, the most Sirius's brain had been able to come up with in his post Remus haze was a hair muss. He groaned at the stupidity of his own actions, resisting the urge to bang his head on a hard surface as he began to pile some gold into his carry pouch.

Just as he reached for the final handful of gold, however, his hand closed around something else. Frowning, he pulled it out from beneath the thin layer of galleons that lay over it, his curiosity peaked when a small jute pouch came through, no bigger than his palm. It looked rather ordinary and Sirius would have simply put it back had it not been for the card dangling from the mouth, where two knotted strings held the pouch firmly closed. Happy Birthday, Remus – it read in cursive that Sirius recognised immediately from the hundreds of letters he had exchanged with his uncle over the years, Hesitantly, Sirius looked back to check on Remus, turning further so that the sandy blonde only had view of his back. He remained kneeling so as not to arouse suspicion as he pulled the knot loose easily and turned the pouch into his palm. Sirius felt his breath catch when a thin gold ring fell out, the inscription on the inside carved in an almost perfect replica of Alphard's handwriting. It contained only two words; two words that had Sirius nearly pulling out his wand to destroy it:

I promised.

Sirius grit his teeth as jealousy and insecurity shot through his veins, that familiar hatred for his uncle making itself visible yet again. His fists clenched tightly around the ring, the smooth metal unyielding to the pressure. Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, he put it back inside the pouch and then into his pockets. If he left it here in the vault, Remus would be able to find it one day, perhaps just as easily as Sirius had today. The honest thing would be for Sirius to give it to him himself, to allow Remus the kindness of feeling less abandoned by Alphard Black and provide him some sort of closure for the unresolved feelings that hung back after the older man's death. But that also meant rekindling Remus's dying love for Alphard Black and Sirius was neither that honest nor that kind. In fact, contrary to Remus's opinion, he was definitely not very different from any other Black. The sandy blonde was only starting to see him differently, allowing Sirius's lingering touches, blushing delightfully when he stared too long, encouraging him to always sit beside him with their thighs and knees touching. Remus was slowly becoming open to Sirius's affections, allowing himself to become almost dependant on Sirius's love for him and the gentle affection he showed.

So Sirius would be damned if he allowed his uncle, like the rest of the Black family, to ruin his chances at happiness with Remus.

'Sirius, are you all right?' An unsure voice asked, a mop of tawny hair and worried amber eyes peeking around the entrance of the vault.

'Yeah,' Sirius grinned, standing up and dusting himself off, as he joined Remus back in the Gringotts cart. Feeling daring, he pressed a quick kiss to Remus's cheek and then another to the very corner of his pink lips, laughing when the boy's mouth dropped in surprise.

After all, Alphard Black was dead.

And the dead were best left buried.

Regulus rounded on him as soon as the door closed. 'Really, Sirius? Really?'

'What?' Sirius asked, with a not so innocent quirk of his eyebrows. He found that his old habits for pranks and mischief making were returning the more time he spent away from home.

Things have been no less difficult with Remus and the entire situation with the Order and the Wolfsbane. Remus had already handed the Wolfsbane over to Dumbledore the same time Sirius had decided to join the Order of Phoenix in order to play an active part against Voldemort in the upcoming war. The both of them were still taking refuge at the Potters which had been heavily guarded because they were all unsure if Remus was ever going stop being hunted for his knowledge. And though Remus was still visibly upset of having had to burn down the house three days ago, his mood was slowly showing signs of improvement. Despite all the hardship, Sirius, for the first time in many, many years, found he could be himself and at ease. He did not have to think twice about being judged or placing Regulus's wellbeing in jeopardy for his behaviour. He did not have to think about the dungeons and the punishments that he was often privy to. Least of all, he did not have to think about his Mother.

'Of all the places in bloody London, you choose the back room in a gay bar to have a serious conversation?'

Sirius grinned, casually flopping backwards into a chair behind him. 'I think it's rather clever.' He waved his wand towards the door, locking it securely and placing silencing charms on it. Though James was currently standing guard outside under the invisibility cloak, precautions were always necessary. 'What are the chances of us being followed in here? Merlin knows Death Eaters are famous for their tolerance,' he muttered sarcastically, his mood turning momentarily dark before lighting up again at the pained expression on his brother's face.

'Very clever,' Regulus rolled his eye, 'but now everyone here thinks we're a couple of perverted brothers who are having sex!'

Sirius found it rather endearing that Regulus had to whisper the word, "sex" as though it were something ridiculously forbidden. A part of him was glad that he had managed to shelter his brother's innocence so far while the other worried what Regulus would do without him there. 'No one knows we're brothers here,' he replied, trying to squash down the feelings of guilt and protectiveness that arose within him. Regulus had proven through this whole Wolfsbane ordeal that he was far more capable than Sirius had given him credit for.

'Sirius,' Regulus grit his teeth in mock irritation, 'despite the inappropriate amount of leather you are wearing,' he swept his hand towards the old leather boots, jacket, and studded collar (remnants James had kept from their school days) with derision. 'We look almost exactly alike. Also, it does not help that the muggles think I'm wearing a dress because you didn't have the decency to tell me where we're meeting and I dressed in robes!' He crossed his arms and kicked his brother in the shin petulantly when Sirius started laughing. 'Mother has taken off her trail on me,' he said softly once Sirius's laughter had died down to a brotherly smile. He sat down on the rusty bed, his upper lip turning when he noticed the suspicious stains on the mattress.

Sirius heaved a sigh of relief. 'I was afraid she would blame you for our escape.' He reached for his brother's hand and squeezed tightly before letting go. 'I'm glad you're safe.'

'Sirius,' Regulus sighed, 'she did blame me.' He rubbed his face tiredly and suddenly, he looked older and more haggard than Sirius had ever seen him. 'I had to give her a reason to trust me without putting you in jeopardy.' His grey eyes bore into Sirius's beseechingly. 'Haven't you noticed that no one has come for you or Lupin yet? Why not even an attempt has been made to ambush you or Lupin, or find out where you are hiding?'

Sirius drew in a sharp breath. He had simply assumed they had done a good job at covering all their tracks. 'You?'

Regulus nodded. 'It's why I asked you to burn down the house and destroy everything.' He wrung his hands together nervously as he started to speak. 'I convinced Mother Lupin was a lost cause; the burning of his house proved that even in capture, he was more likely to let himself die than help recreate the Wolsbane. I offered an alternative.' Here, he looked away from Sirius, as if ashamed. 'Severus Snape.'

It took a moment for Sirius to recognise the name. 'Snivellus? That prat from school?' he asked incredulously, remembering the greasy haired boy both he and James had despised and tormented in their Hogwarts years. 'What has he got to do with anything?'

'He was a senior at school and a natural Potions prodigy. I used to watch him work when we were in Hogwarts; he could brew just about anything as long as he knew what the end result was. If anyone can recreate the Wolfsbane, however long it may take, it's Snape.' Regulus explained, still not looking at Sirius, his gaze focused on his shoes instead. 'I helped recruit him into the Death Eaters.'

Sirius's head swam. 'I don't understand,' he whispered, though he understood perfectly well. 'You helped recruit him. You-' his gaze focused and unconfused, and he swallowed multiple times as he tried to process the meaning behind Regulus's unspoken words and demeanor.

'It's why I wanted to meet today, Sirius. I wanted to make sure you were all right one last time before we parted ways.' He smiled weakly, his arms held up towards his brother, requesting an embrace. His smiled faltered when Sirius did not respond and then subsequently pushed his arms away as rejection. 'Sirius, please don't make this any more difficult. I don't want us to part ways this way wh- ' He cried out in surprise when Sirius grabbed him by the elbow roughly and pulled him closer until they were face to face.

'You are not going anywhere!' Sirius growled, teeth clenched together in anger. 'You are coming with me!' His hold on his brother tightened when he tried to twist away in protest. 'I forbade you, Regulus! I allowed you to remain at Grimmauld on the condition that you do as I order and stay out of trouble! Yet, a few weeks in and you are already disobeying me and joining this bloody cult that-'

'I will do as I please!' Regulus shouted, pulling his hand away and pushing Sirius back. 'You do not have a say on what I can and cannot do! I am grown enough to make my own decisions and I feel that I can achieve what's important by joining the Death Eaters! Don't think you can simply lay an order and expect me to listen to you at every turn! You are not my keeper!'

Anger flooded through Sirius's veins, blood pumping to his head and staining the front of his eyes until all he could see was red. Before he knew what he was doing, Sirius had raised a hand and backhanded his younger brother hard across the face, sending Regulus reeling back into the bed he had been sitting on earlier. 'I AM YOUR BROTHER!' He roared and was about to raise his hand again, when something in Regulus's teary grey eyes stopped him, his hand shaking as it hung midair above his head.

Regulus's lower lip trembled. 'And you are becoming just like mother.' He raised a hand to his cheek, where Sirius's ring had broken skin. It was the ring that bore the Black family crest – Sirius had not even realised he was still wearing it. 'I really wanted us to part as brothers, Sirius.' He stood up, swiping at his eyes with the back of his hand and then meeting Sirius's softened gaze. 'Don't think for a second that I haven't noticed everything you've sacrificed to keep me safe and don't think I'm ungrateful for it.' He stood up straighter, as if trying to seem taller in front of his older brother. 'You taught me what it means to protect the people I loved and do the right thing no matter what, and I took those lessons seriously.' He raised his chin defiantly in a way that reminded Sirius too much of himself. 'Don't tell me now to abandon them.'

Again, he raised his arms, trying to wrap them around his elder brother in a hug, but Sirius, still unable to accept Regulus's decision, moved away from his touch a second time. Perhaps, he thought, if Sirius showed enough disapproval, Regulus would concede. His little brother had never gone against him, certainly not to this degree. This was the boy, who until recently, had tagged along with Sirius everywhere and constantly tried to gain his approval by doing foolish things. Foolish things like joining Voldemort's ranks and getting involved in the Dark Arts. He waited, his eyes closed tight and his lungs tighter from the lack of oxygen, for Regulus to concede; to laugh and agree to come with Sirius instead. He waited, his heart hammering wildly in his chest and the silence in the room sounding like an incessant drumming in his ears.

'Goodbye, Sirius,' Regulus whispered and by the time Sirius whipped around and opened his eyes, the door had already closed shut behind him.

'Thank you for helping me with the garden, Remus. It's always such a chore to do it alone.' She wiped the sweat collecting on her forehead with the back of her gloved hand, as she looked up Remus through tendrils of messy red hair. 'It's lovely to have someone to talk to.' She reached out to rub some dirt off of Remus's nose with her thumb. 'Sorry,' she blushed when she realised she was being overly familiar. 'It's this pregnancy, it makes all my mothering instincts come out.'

Remus laughed softly, his hands fluidly sifting through the dirt as he planted each seed in organised randomness. 'You will make a very good mother.'

Lily brightened. 'You really think so? James and I can't help but be nervous. Everyone keeps telling us we're too young to be parents, but that doesn't mean we'll love this child any less.' She touched the small swell of her stomach gently, her face full of affection and adoration for her unborn child. 'I can only hope to be as good to my child as my mother was to me.' She rubbed her belly in concentric circles, looking down as if mesmerised by her own movements. 'What was your mother like?'

Remus felt the smile slide from his face. 'She's a good woman,' he said quietly, his hands slowly bringing the dirt together to form a small mound over the seed he had just planted. 'But she was dealt with the misfortune of having me as a son.' The words out of his mouth tasted bitter even as he said it and he was surprised by how much he cared even after all this time. But Remus had always cared, had even reached out to her for comfort when Alphard had died; would still seek her out if today Sirius suddenly decided to abandon him.

A pale hand rested on top of his, thumb brushing his knuckles comfortingly and pulling him out of his self-pity. 'No child can bring misfortune to this world, least of all one as kind as you.' She smiled, her emerald eyes crinkling in the corners, and Remus could not help smile back. 'Sirius has taken a real shine to you and I can see why.'

Remus blushed, trying to hide the fact that he was secretly pleased by pouring measured water into the earth. 'Have you known him long?'

'Unfortunately. He was an absolute tyrant in school. Sirius Black and James Potter – the great marauding duo!' She mocked, flinging her arms out for drama and having dirt fly everywhere in the process. 'Merlin, the pranks they pulled! It could never be something silly or regular like dying a girl's hair blue or setting off some harmless Dungbombs. No, with them, everything was a production and the world their stage. From seducing the Giant Squid to serenading the Headmaster to having naked cupids delivering lewd Valentine messages. Prats, they were, both of them!'

Remus laughed, despite Lily clearly not being amused by the antics. It seemed just the thought of them was enough to colour her face red with irritation. 'The sound lovely.'

Lily snorted. 'Why do I have a feeling you would have fit right in with them?' When Remus shrugged and shot her a mischievous smile, she playfully bumped shoulders with him. 'Ironically, it was when their friendship started deteriorating that James and I got together. I was glad at that time because without Sirius's influence, James was kinder, more sensitive, mature – everything I thought I wanted in a man.'

Remus cocked his head curiously, brows furrowed. 'Do you know why they drifted apart?'

Lily shook her head. 'It was mutual. James refused to tell me the reason, but whatever it was, it changed Sirius. I never thought I would miss him, but when he started to get quieter, more reserved, miserable, I was worried. The whole school was, I think, because it seemed like he was trying to disappear.' Without her having to explain any further, Remus already knew that Sirius's family had somehow been involved. He remembered when Sirius had first come to the house, how formal and restrained he had been. 'It didn't stop the girls from fawning over him though,' she laughed, lightening the mood considerably. 'Suddenly, he was this tall, dark, brooding chap whose walls only the fairest maiden could penetrate.' Lily snorted. 'The only time he ever seemed accessible was with Regulus.'

'I owe my life to Regulus,' Remus said quietly, with a smile, as he thought of the younger Black. Remus had only seen him in passing, but felt that he already knew him well from all the stories Sirius had told of him. He felt a fondness for Regulus that was akin to that of a younger brother. 'He's done a lot for both Sirius and I.'

'I'm not surprised,' Lily nodded, pulling the small box of peonies to her and started de-potting them. 'I think he would do anything for Sirius. Regulus was the only person in school Sirius ever gave a fuck about; he made sure he ate his meals, helped with his homework, turned furious if anyone even looked at Regulus the wrong way – that gentle side of him had girls simply swooning.' She touched her bump again possessively and smiled. 'I think I would consider myself lucky if I can be even half a parent as Sirius was to that boy. He's a good man,' she said softly as she started working on her peonies back again, 'and I can tell from just the way he looks at you that he's crazy about you.'

Remus felt his cheeks grow warm and he felt himself unable to look at amused green eyes. He was just about to change the topic and ask her about dinner, when he heard two sets of feet, one louder the other, walk up the pathway to the house. He only caught a glimpse of Sirius's black hair before the boy walked into the house, slamming the door behind him and leaving James still standing outside, steps away from them. When they looked up at him, with expressions of worry and concern, he shook his head and sighed heavily, squatting down beside them.

'I don't know what happened, if that's what you're wondering.' He kissed his wife on the cheek, his hand unconsciously drifting to her stomach as his arm circled her waist. 'But I have a good inkling that his meeting with Regulus did not go well. I can't ask him anything in this state, but I'm gathering that it isn't anything life threatening or he would have taken action by now.'

Remus looked back at the house, where he could still hear stomping footsteps and multiple doors which were suffering Sirius Black's wrath. 'I'll go check up on him.'

He was stopped in his tracks by James who grabbed a hold of his wrist. 'Believe me when I say this, he is going to explode at any moment, and you don't want to be caught between the debris of a Black strop.' His hazel eyes though worried, seemed confident, and Remus was very tempted to trust him. After all, James Potter had known Sirius most of his life and had been his best friend for longer. 'Give him time,' the black haired boy said gently, his fingers squeezing in a reassuring manner. 'Let him sort it out by himself.'

Remus looked back at the house, which had suddenly gone eerily silent. 'I can't,' he replied apologetically, pulling his hand out of James's grasp and running into the house. It felt like a betrayal somehow to Remus, to ignore Sirius when he was distressed, after the black haired boy had done so much for him. He felt even more worried when the only sound he could hear were the echoes of his own footsteps as he fast walked through the hallway and then ran up the staircase two at a time. He didn't know what he expected to see, but he felt a huge relief nonetheless when he walked in to Sirius's bedroom to see him sifting through the cupboard. 'Hey,' he said tentatively, drawing closer in small, measured steps in case Sirius decided to follow through James's prediction and explode.

Sirius grunted in reply, not looking back. He pulled a couple of shirts out of their hangers and tossed them to his left, where Remus only then noticed, his trunk lay open.

'What are you doing?' Remus asked, swallowing and moving closer. The trunk was already half full, piles of clothes and shoes strewn about inside messily.

'I'm leaving,' Sirius replied shortly, still refusing to meet Remus's eyes.

No! A part of Remus screamed. You can't leave me! He quelled it down, trying to control the part of him that was slowly going into hysteria from fear of abandonment yet again. It seemed almost as if a curse with Remus, where everything he cared for left because they could not bring themselves to be with him any longer. He licked his dry lips and asked what his brain told him was a more reasonable and logical question: 'Where are you going?'

'Home.'

Remus's eyes widened. 'Sirius, you can't.'

Sirius's hands paused and Remus's amber eyes mapped the tremble in each every individual finger, as momentary silence enveloped them. 'I have to,' he replied in a pained voice.

'They'll kill you.'

Sirius let out a dry laugh. 'They'll kill my brother first.'

Regulus. Dread settled at the very pit of his stomach, heavy and uncomfortable, and for a moment, Remus felt afraid. Afraid that his foolishness with the Wolfsbane was costing yet another innocent life. Not for the first time, Remus wished he had listened to Alphard and ignored Dumbledore's request. His decision saved lives he knew, but the few lives that were in danger were now becoming Remus's responsibility instead. 'Hey,' he said softly, a tentative hand curling around Sirius's shoulder and urging the boy to face him. 'Just calm down for a moment,' both hands now guided the black haired boy to sit down on the bed. Remus tried not to worry too much over the vacant expression in Sirius's eyes or the way his body followed instructions numbly. 'Tell me what happened.'

'He's joined them – the Death Eaters.' At Remus's surprised gasp, Sirius let out a humourless chuckle. 'I don't know what he's playing at; what he thinks he can achieve by doing this.' His fingers buried inside into dark locks pulling in frustration. 'I don't know if this is a rebellion against me or if he's being forced into this by Mother. Or if he is trying to be some kind of hero and trying to bring them down all by himself. I don't fucking know!' Both hands formed fists, punctuating the pause between his words with a bang, as fists hit the bedspread angrily. 'Whatever the fuck he is trying, he can't survive there. He is getting in way above his head.'

'Have you tried talking to him?' Remus asked, one hand coming up to rest on the small of Sirius's back.

'He's past listening to me,' Sirius shook his head. 'He's gotten cocky; just because I'm out of the house, he thinks he can do whatever he pleases,' he growled, his anger coming back in full force. 'He's always been a soft headed idiot, never thinking through his actions, saying and doing whatever his heart tells him. He is and always will be a child.' He grit his teeth when Remus kept him from getting up. 'I need to go home,' Sirius snapped, trying to push the amber eyed boy away and failing. 'It was stupid of me to think Regulus would last a single day without me; stupid and selfish. I should have never left. I don't know what I was thinking but I need to go back. He needs me.'

The second time Sirius tried to push him away, Remus forcefully wrapped him arms around him and pulled him to his chest so tightly he could feel Sirius's harsh breaths against his neck. 'Shh,' he hushed when the young Black continued to struggle against him, 'listen to me, Sirius, you can't go back. If you do, you only put yourself, Regulus, and everyone around you in more danger.' He could feel Sirius's heart hammering against his chest; could feel his pulse jumping wildly where Remus had placed a hand on the back of his neck, running his fingers through dark hair; could feel his entire body shaking as he tried and failed to repress sobs of anger and helplessness, and then finally, he could feel when cold droplets of despair fell on to his shoulder, spreading across the thin material of his shirt.

'How could I have been so selfish?' Sirius cries were muffled against Remus's shoulders. 'I just left him there! I put myself before my own brother and now I'm going to lose him!' Sharp nails dug into Remus's shoulder. 'He's just a child! He doesn't know any better!'

Remus felt that familiar guilt rising in him again. 'Sirius,' he started softly, his lips pressing to dark hair, 'Regulus is anything but a child. Look at us,' he held tear stained cheeks between his palms as teary grey eyes rose to look up at him. 'We are here today because of him. You need to accept that he is capable of taking care of himself and trust that he knows what he is doing. You might not understand it, but you need to trust him the same way he has trusted you all these years.' He pushed Sirius's wayward hair out of his face and tucked it behind his ears. 'If he is anything like you, then he is brave, intelligent, and above all, good. He would want you to be happy. To live your own life and for once, to be selfish.' Unable to resist the pain in those soulful grey eyes any longer, Remus closed the distance between them and pressed his lips gently to the other boy's.

He heard Sirius's sharp intake of breath and felt hands tighten on his waist, but the mouth against his was pliant and willing, opening itself up to his searching tongue. Remus was gentle with him, running long fingers through dark hair before moving them to encircle Sirius's waist and pull him closer so that their chests touched. He took his time exploring Sirius's mouth, their tongues meeting halfway while their lips made the barest of brushes. When they both finally parted, out of breath, Remus rested his forehead against Sirius's.

Searching grey eyes looked up at him, laced with confusion and doubt.

Remus smiled, running the back of his hand against Sirius's cheek. 'You can be as selfish as you like with me,' he whispered and was caught by surprise when lips crashed against his so violently that he was knocked backwards.

The back of his head met mattress just as Sirius covered his body with his own, chests, bellies and knees touching. Needy hands gripped his hips tightly just as their groins aligned, eliciting a moan from both of them. Remus was barely able to catch his breath, when he felt Sirius's lips press against his neck while his fingers worked on the buttons of Remus's shirt, popping them open one by one. As a tongue circled his nipple, Remus was panting, feeling winded and heady with desire. He could do nothing but moan as lips and tongue and teeth marked a wet, saliva slicked trail down his navel to the very waistband of his trousers. And there Sirius hesitated, looking up at Remus with unsure eyes, teeth worrying his bottom lip.

'Come here,' Remus beckoned, sitting up and shifting backwards until his back hit pillows. He watched as Sirius toed off his shoes, then crawled up to him, his jeans slipping lower across his hips from the movement.

It was jarring, Remus realised as Sirius hovered on top of him. It was jarring to see Sirius Black look so unsure and afraid and overwhelmed, when he had been nothing but a pillar of strength for Remus throughout this whole ordeal. He had saved him, had been there for him at every turn, had even taken the worst of Remus's problems upon himself and made them vanish until he was cocooned inside a comfortable bubble of safety. Even when they had first met, Remus was in awe with Sirius's spirit and his bravery, how he spoke with such conviction that you had little choice but to be swayed by his words. Something, sometime, had to give; and Remus realised with the tiniest fraction of jealousy, that Regulus was Sirius's breaking point.

Remus looked up at grey eyes, still hesitant, as if waiting for his permission to continue. Still maintaining eye contact, he let his hands drift to the hem of Sirius's t-shirt and pulled it over his head. He didn't let his eyes waver even as he popped open the button of Sirius's jeans, the pull of zipper sounding obnoxiously loud in the silence. He could hear the other boy's breathing speed up from apprehension, the muscles in his bare chest visibly shifting as a thin trail of sweat trickled down his neck. Their gazes finally broke when Remus took Sirius's cock in hand and Sirius let his eyes fall shut with a quiet groan. A soft pink tongue darted out to trace the sweat that was now beginning to pool in the hollows of the dark haired boy's neck, his shoulders, and at the very tips of his nipples.

'Remus,' Sirius moaned, pushing against the hand that was pumping him in a slow and steady rhythm. 'Remus, can I-ah-can I-'

Remus already knew what Sirius was asking without him having to articulate it into words. He took Sirius's right hand within his own, entwining their fingers momentarily before guiding the index and middle fingers into his mouth and sucking with abandon, his tongue rough against calloused finger tips. 'Have me,' he whispered kissing each digit as he spread his legs and wrapped them around Sirius's waist.

Remus only had second to hear the hitch in Sirius's breath and the guttural moan that rumbled through his chest, before he was caught up in a whirlwind of movement where Sirius was pushing him down into the bed and divesting his of the last shred of clothing. It was uncomfortable at first as Sirius tried to prepare him, slow and patient, despite the tremble of his biceps where Remus's fingers clutched tightly from the pain and the turgidity of his cock as it smeared pre-cum on to Remus's stomach. But the discomfort soon passed and morphed into something so much more pleasurable and so very carnal that they seemed nothing but a mass of writhing flesh and body, merged into one, their words coming out as garbled moans as they thrust against one and other. The air between them crackled, Sirius pushing into him again and again, groaning into Remus's neck, biting, kissing.

'Remus,' Sirius breathed, smashing their lips together as he peaked, hips snapping until he was coming deep inside Remus and arms tightening so that he was holding the amber eyed boy impossibly close to him.

When Remus's own high faded and the white behind Remus's eyelids slowly faded to black, he felt Sirius collapse against him, still holding him tight as he slept. He didn't move, simply adjusting their positions so that Sirius's head was pillowed comfortably against his chest, sweat cooling between their bodies. His eyelids drifted shut as a small smile crept to the corners of his lips. He couldn't remember a time when someone had loved him as strongly as Sirius did right then.

'Morning.'

Sirius did not look behind him, even as he felt a hand rest on the small of his back. He remained sitting as he was, knees drawn to his chest and eyes trained to the view outside the window. Regret was burning thick and hot in his stomach, as he felt the jostle of bedsheets signaling that Remus had also sat up beside him. He closed his eyes, not wanting to face the consequences of his actions yet, wishing he could have a few more hours of solitude to compose himself. 'Remus, can I ask you a question?'

'Of course.'

'When we first met, why did you let me in your house?' He turned back to see guarded amber eyes watching him. 'You knew that someone in the Black family had killed Uncle Alphard, so you had no reason to trust me. Were you…' He swallowed, looking away. Sirius didn't really want to hear the answer; he much preferred oblivion. But ignorance had already caused him to lose everything; his home, his brother, and very possibly after last night, even Remus. So he asked the question that had been plaguing his mind from the very beginning: 'Were you using me to find out who had done it?'

'No,' Remus answered after momentary silence. 'I already knew.'

Sirius's eyes widened and this time he turned his whole body around so that they were sitting face to face, knees touching. 'Then why?'

Remus smiled that sweet lopsided smile of his, as if the answer was obvious. 'You were the only kind face that approached me that day.' His hand rested on Sirius's knee. 'The whole town hated me because they thought I was this dirty faggot who had seduced Alphard into giving me his money; your family at the funeral mirrored the sentiment. My own parents wouldn't even talk to me when I was at my lowest. Perhaps I would have been fine if it wasn't my fault that Alphard had died. And perhaps it would have been fine if I hadn't realised just the night before that I had spent my whole fucking life never, ever being loved by a single person. Not one. Not even Alphard whose bruises I was still carrying on my face because I felt as though I deserved it.' He sighed when Sirius shot him a sympathetic look. 'But then you showed up at my doorstep. You didn't know who I was or what I was, and I remembered how much your uncle praised you for being different…kinder. I was so, so alone, Sirius, and I won't lie to you,' his amber eyes shone with regret, 'I was searching for Alphard within you.'

Sirius looked away, his fears since the morning already realised. Despair clouded his mind and he had never been good at controlling his emotions, so he spoke his mind without filter, 'This isn't how I wanted it to be.' He punched the mattress with his fist, startling the other boy. 'I made my feelings clear to you from the beginning, I was even willing to wait till maybe you felt something for me too, but Remus I-' He rubbed his face with his hands, feeling sick and tired of everything, 'I don't want to be used as a cheap substitute for Alphard or given a pity fuck because I seem desperate for some form of comfort. You asked me to be selfish so I'm telling you that this isn't what I want.'

'You're right,' Remus replied, his eyes hard and suddenly devoid of its characteristic gentleness. 'You are a very cheap substitute for Alphard because you are nothing like him. You are rash and sometimes foolish, you care little for my privacy, barging into my life and my problems without thought, you aren't quite as smart as Alphard, nor are you as accomplished. I learned from Alphard what it was like to love someone with every fibre of my being, but unlike Alphard, I learned from you what it's like to be loved back the same way.'

Shocked grey eyes looked into challenging amber. 'Back?'

Remus did not humour him with an answer, instead leaning forward and pulling him into a deep kiss, not unlike the one they had shared last night. Already Sirius could feel the stirrings of arousal deep within him, as the meaning behind Remus's words registered in his brain. His fingers gripped Remus's naked hips, thumbs rubbing circles into the soft skin, until they finally parted, breathing heavily. For the first time since yesterday, Sirius felt euphoria bubbling in his chest until he could not contain any longer and let it out in a mixture of goofy grin and short bursts of disbelieving laughter.

'Back?' he asked again, though perhaps the way Remus had peppering the smallest of kisses on his face was answer enough.

'Back,' Remus confirmed with an answering grin.

THE END

So when I ran the last chapter by my friend, she said things still felt a little bit incomplete. Unfortunately this was the ending I had planned so I can't actually see past it and think of anything to add. So I would love to hear from you guys! Do you think there should be an epilogue and what would you guys like to see written in it? Please feel free to give me as many suggestions as you want because I'm going to try my best to incorporate all the ideas I get! Thank you for sticking with me this far!

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