Still sick, so the mammy and the sisters have taken my books from me and won't let me study. 21 years old and I'm still being bossed around!

Final exams start on Tuesday..

OH WELL! MORE WRITING! I like this chapter, so it's fine!

REVIEWERS!

Niom Lamboise; Ah pal, you reviewed like ten minutes after I posted the last chapter so I didn't get a chance to reply in 7! Hope it was good enough for ya though, did think about jealous alright, but then I just really didn't want him with Laura cause I hated her in the comics so yeah! Enjoy this one! Hope this is updating quick enough too :P Because, trust me, my next stories will NOT be this quick :P

BlackHawk's Child; Well, wasn't planning on leaving it there, it had to be split in two cause it was long and I hate putting chapters that are over 5,000 up! So, yeah, sorry for cutting it at that point, was a little mean of me! :P

Enjoy and review please!

And thanks to everyone who favourited and followed! Didn't think this little silly idea would get such love!

Disclaimer; Own nothing to do with Marvel. Just, some day I will stop writing this and instead just point you legal people to my other stories to read it!

There was a voice, but he couldn't quite hear it porperly. It was muffled, quiet, but strong at the same time.

He shouldn't be hearing things. He was dead.

There were feelings too. Strong, horrendous pain. It just came on him all at once. His left leg could move, something was ontop of his right leg, pinning it in place.

Shackles? No, that would be around the ankle..

But he was taken by Hydra again, wasn't he? He was outnumbered so much, and he gave up to them. They wouldn't leave him not confined.

The voice was getting increasingly louder, it was bringing him out of the haze. But he wanted to stay in the haze, he really did. He just wanted to sleep, wanted to sink away from all this pain.

It was warm, way too warm. Humid air, made it difficult to breathe. Though some pain in his chest was doing that job aswell. Crushed rids, collapsed lung, he couldn't tell right now.

"..Tony and Natasha are clearing.." Clear words finally came from the voice before they went mumbling again, his concentration only staying long enough to register those.

Tony and Natasha..

He knew those names. Where did he know those names from? The voice was familiar too, but he couldn't place it to anyone in his mind.

Concussed.. Start from the start..

It was a trick he learned one of the first times he got a bad head injury, start with the small things and the big things will come back too.

Clinton Francis Barton. Clint. Archer. Hawkeye. Circus act. No, SHIELD agent now.. No, Avenger now..

Avengers..

That's a group.. Natalia Romanova. Natasha Romanoff. Nat. Black Widow. All around bad ass. Top of hit list.. No, SHIELD agent now.. No, Avenger now..

Natasha.. Mission, and shooting, and a helicopter..

And..

His eyes shot open as the situation finally dawned on him, and he was staring up at nothing but darkness. By feeling on it's own though, he knew that millimetre infront of his face was rubble threatening to collapse and take him.

He was lucky..

Damn lucky..

This must be the only crevice in the place, and his lucky ass was the one in it.

"You just have to last a little longer. We're coming for you, ok?" The voice was still panicked, but he could finally place it as one of his team mates coming over his comms.

"S-Steve..?" He called back, his voice cracking a little as he groaned. Something was wrong, he shouldn't feel so much pain just by talking. Internal bleeding..

"Clint! Oh thank fuck.." Came the relieved reply, and despite the situation he had to smile a little. Worrying Captain America was no easy task.. He was usually too happy-go-lucky to get worried.

"Language.." He croaked back, and he could hear the slight laugh from the star spangled man.

"I'll let that one slide. Hang on, Natasha only left." He finally said, though it was cracking. His aids were damaged. He could just pick up words through the crackles of them. "Natasha! I finally got him!"

Got him..? The way it was said made it sound like they weren't expecting to. There was some commotion over the comms, and Clint's eyes had slipped closed again. He didn't have the energy to keep them open.

"..swer me, please.." He heard after a while, and he realised he dozed of a little. It was Natasha this time, her voice filled with worry and, well, something he couldn't quite place.

"Guess I didn't.. Make it in ten minutes.." He said quietly, smiling a little to himself. He didn't want her worrying, there was nothing to worry about.

A shocked laugh greeted his ears, and he couldn't help but wonder if she had given up on him.

No, not Tash.

She never would.

"By about four hours, bird brain.." Damn.. That's a long time..

"Well, was a little occupied.. Being crushed and all.." He wanted to sleep again, his head was rolling to the side and he had to keep snapping it back to attention.

"Condition?" He snapped his eyes open when she asked, her mission voice on now. That always snapped him back to professional mode and both of them knew it.

So, he tested out all the main things, and gave the usual completely descriptive position he was in, starting from worst to best.

"Right leg crushed. Some chest pain, either rib or lung or both. My head is way too foggy, and talking hurts so there's some internal damage, left shoulder is definitely dislocated. On my back though, so that's a good thing. All in all, not in a good position, ma'am." It always amazed him how when they got into mission mode things just melted away, the pain was on a back burner, he couldn't care about it. He had another mission to complete and that was getting out of here alive and making sure he never had to hear that worry in her voice again.

"We're clearing rubble now.. Steve and Tony grabbed the Quinjet and were here in no time. SHIELD newbies too, even Maria came to help." Her voice was soft again, though he had to keep his mind straight.

"It's not looking good, is it..?" He whispered to her, letting his eyes close when he didn't get an immediate answer.

"I don't know how bad your injuries are, Clint.." She whispered back, and he nodded even though he knew she couldn't see him.

"Leg is the worst.." He eventually replied, it wasn't just broken, those bones were definitely crushed. "Tasha, this crevice is so small that if they clear something the wrong way.."

"I won't let them do that." She said sternly, cutting him off mid sentence. "I'm getting you out of there. I owe you at least that much, right? Then I'll kill you for putting me through this."

He laughed a little, though it quickly turned into a coughing fit as pain ripped through him. He couldn't move any part of him to help ease the discomfort though. Moving could make things worse.

The coughing didn't help. Each splutter would have him inhaling some dust, inhaling some dust made him cough more. It was a viscous circle.

She was talking frantically to him, though his mind had gone muddled again so he couldn't hear her properly.

Hyperventilating. That was what was happening.

He just couldn't get a breath into him, because one thought crossed his mind during his time coughing and hurting.

"I'm not getting out.." He wheezed out his thought, his uninjured arm going to clutch his chest as it constricted, his eyes looking around frantically for a way out. "Tash, I'm not getting out!"

"Breathe Clint." She said quickly, though that's what he was trying to do! "We're getting you out! I promise, I swear to you with every fibre of my being I will get you out."

"I-in a casket.." He whispered back, shaking his head at the thought.

He didn't want to die down here! He had to go out in a blaze of glory! Not in some rubble after an explosion! That's not how Hawkeye is supposed to die!

"Clinton Barton you listen to me now!" But it was no use. He was gone, he was panicking too much to even listen to her as she went on at him.

He put his head down against the rubble beneath it, freely crying at the situation infront of him.

"Little Hawk!" That caused him to pause his panic completely, his hand still clutching the fabric of his chest.

Little Hawk..

She had called him that so many times, at first it was to tease him, after learning it was a nickname he held dear to his heart. But after learning the reason he had it, after learning where it came from, she started using it as the term of endearment it was meant for.

"You know not to go near him, Clint.." She whispered softly to the crying child, and he just clung to the front of her shirt and curled into her a little more.

His eye hurt, and he wanted it to stop, he didn't know why it wouldn't stop. The belt hits would stop hurting after a few minutes, but this wasn't! He didn't like fists anymore..

"But he was.. He was.." The little boy tried get some breath to finish, but his little sobs were making it too difficult to.

"I know sweetie." She shushed, rocking him a little like she would when he couldn't sleep. "But it's a grown up thing, Clint. You can't stop him. You can't pour grown up stuff down the sink."

"I don't like when he drinks it, mommy.." He eventually stuttered out, hit little tears still falling. "I wanted to stop him drinking it.."

"It was brave of you, love." She calmly said, and he tilted his head up to see her smiling down at him. He was never in trouble with mommy. Only with daddy. He didn't know why.

She pulled him away from her chest so he could look at her properly, and to this day he always remembered her smile being the most beautiful he had ever seen.

Carefully, so as to not hurt the bruise that was forming on the child's eye, she wiped his little tears with her thumbs. "You're my brave hero, so don't be crying. Little Hawk doesn't cry, right..?"

"I'll get you out, you just have to breathe for me." Her calm voice drew him out of the memory, and he nodded. "You there Clint..?"

"Yeah.." He replied a little weakly, unable to stop some shaking that had taken over his body. If he was going into shock ontop of everything else, he was going to flip..

"Good.. Just stay with me, ok? Tony finally found your heat signature. You're under alot of rubble Hawk." She sounded like she was smiling, she was trying to be ok, but he doubted she was.

"I'm sorry Tash.." He whispered to her, eyes falling closed once again as he tried will the shaking to stop.

"You have nothing to be sorry for.." She whispered back, he could hear some talking near her. Tony and Steve were no doubt planning.

"I shouldn't have got you to blow it up.. I should have just gotten taken.. You would've gotten me out in no time, but I wasn't thinking.. I didn't want to be taken by them again, didn't want to go through it, I wouldn't have lasted, I.."

"Clint. Breathe." Her commanding words cut him off, and he realised that the panic was rising again.

Who could blame him? He was helpless here. He was just waiting for either life or death to take him. He didn't know which would happen or when. At least he had some control over hostage situations, most times he got out alone, others he knew he wouldn't die or be killed.

This time though, he had so much unfinished business, so much shit left hanging in the air, and possibly no time to clear it. He couldn't leave so much unfinished!

"I gotta talk to Laura.." He suddenly said, and he knew he caught her off guard by the hitch in her breath.

"Don't know if that's the best idea." Tony's voice came through his ears, Clint didn't even realise the others were listening. But made sense, all their comms were always linked.

"Tony please.." He pleaded quietly, if he had the Iron Man suit then he could patch a call through easier than on the comms. "I gotta tell her some things, where the kids things are, just incase.."

"Tony.." Natasha's quiet whisper cut him off, and he couldn't hear the exchange beyond that. But he soon heard Tony sigh and agree, then there was the sound of dialling.

"Stark, whenever you call it's to borrow my kids for some elaborate plan." Laura's laughing voice come over the comms, and he couldn't help but smile a little. That's the exact reason why uncle Tony's visiting was very limited. After the weekend Cooper went home limping from trying out a child sized Iron Man suit, uncle Tony had to be watched pretty closely around them.

"Just me, Laura.." He said softly, trying to keep his voice even. He didn't need to worry her, though he knew he didn't sound right.

"Clint? Sorry, ID said Tony." She sighed, and he had a feeling she was still mad at him for cancelling the kids visit for what would be the third time in a row. Missions just took him away too much lately to have a chance. "What's up?"

"You got a pen and paper..?" He asked quietly, his head lulling to the side again so he had to snap it back to normal. He knew she would, unless she changed the house entirely. "There's a safety d.. A deposit place in New York. Boxes number 547, 548, and 549.. Cooper's, Lila's, and Nate's.. Passwords are their birth weight, birth time, birth date, in that order.."

"Ok.." She said with a confused tone, he knew it was a weird call, but he needed to tell her about this.

He was always worried that one day he'd never make it back from a mission, so he had those boxes filled with little bits of his. A letter for each, some arrows, some old photos, some items that meant alot to him as a kid, and some slips detailing bank accounts for each child. When he got a fair amount of money a while back, it was automatically split between the three of them.

"..cause you're kind of scaring me here.." She soon said, and he realised that he blacked out again while she was talking.

"Are they around..?" He asked quietly, his voice mumbling now as darkness threatened him again.

"They're all in bed. It's late." She simply replied, and he nodded, remembering that he had no idea what time it actually was.

"Sorry, that's right.." He sighed, thinking a little so he could choose his next words carefully. "I don't blame you for leaving me, Laura.. I need you to know that."

"You been drinking?" She asked suddenly, and his heart sank a little. Is that what everyone always thinks? But her tone made it seem like it was what she was hoping for rather than thinking of.

Then again, his words were slurred, and it was the most random phone call he's given, so he'd humour her.

"Yeah.. Sorry." He replied, and he could just feel Natasha wanting to cut in and tell her off. He was dying, and he was still trying to protect everyone from hurt. "I just need you to know these little things.. I was a mess, I wasn't there for you or the kids.. I wasn't a husband, and I'm so grateful you stuck around as long as you did.. I'm glad I had you in my life Laura.."

That's called being a hero.. Making sure everyone's ok before you are..

"Go to sleep, Barton." She sighed after a long pause, and he smiled a little sadly. He may just do that. "I'll drop the kids up on Saturday, ok? Sweet dreams."

He didn't get a chance to reply, she hung up the phone on him.

"Clint..?" It was a few minutes of silence before his partner broke it, and he sighed a little bit.

"I'm fine.." He replied, and he found that he actually was. He thought that would be a difficult call, thought he'd break down and just lose it. But he was fine, and it finally made him realise he was over Laura.

He was over the divorce, they were pretty much strangers to eachother now. He didn't need her.

But damn, he needed Natasha..

"Guys still on comms..?" He asked quietly, not wanting them to be. If he was going to leave, he wanted his last few moments spent talking with Natasha and Natasha alone.

"Just you and me, big guy." She soon replied, she must have kicked them out of the frequency.

"Didn't get shot.." He said through a slight grin, though he knew this was much worse.

"You didn't." She laughed her reply, making him smile a little more. He always found a sense of pride in making her laugh. "We're all very proud of you for that."

"Better be.." He chuckled, whimpering cut it short though when the pain rippled through his chest again.

"Easy Hawk.." She said softly, soothingly, he was in bad shape if that voice was coming out. "You just stay with me, ok? They nearly have you."

"I love you.." He said out of no where, but they had to be said. This was next on his unfinished business.

Those words had to be said to her before anything else happened. She had to know how he felt, how empty his life was after she left him. She had to know that, yeah, he loved Laura, so so much, but it wasn't like this confession was now just some rebound love.

Natasha was never quiet about that. Never quiet about how only a few months after they broke up, he was already with Laura. He didn't know if it was jealously, he didn't think it was. Natasha wasn't the sort to get jealous, but he always felt bad about upsetting her.

"Clint, you're delusional.." She whispered to him. He could just about hear a tint of hope though, she didn't want it to be near death talk.

He shook his head. This was the most clear it had been in months. This was the best shape his thoughts had been in for the longest time. He could finally get everything in check and it only took a cave in to make it happen.

"No.. No, it's not that.." He replied quietly, trying to make sure the words would come out of his mouth right. He was getting weaker, the spots were forming on his vision, threatening to take him to the dark place again. "I shouldn't have let you walk out that day. Marriage doesn't matter, it really doesn't, it never did. I don't know why I didn't just stop you and let you know it was fine. I should've just kept you, kept things the way they were, because they were perfect that way.."

"Clint.." She cut him off, but he didn't want to stop, and that's what he knew she was going to say.

"I don't regret what I had with Laura.." He went on, ignoring that she was about continue on. "I loved her, I really did.. I love our kids, I loved our life.. But we can't have lives like that, can we? Assassins, agents, Avengers.. We can't have normal relationships.."

"I think you proved that alright.." She whispered, or maybe it was actually normal talking, he couldn't tell anymore, consciousness was coming and going in quick little bursts. "But you gave it your best shot.. "

"I never miss with my best shot.. Come on, give the world greatest marksman some credit.. " He said through a slight chuckle, hearing her laugh a little on the other end aswell. "It was my worst shot, a complete cluster fuck.. I wanted to be a normal husband and father but I didn't want to stop going on missions.."

"You could have."

"No, I tried.." He said with a shake of his head. "I couldn't leave you guys alone.. I loved you all too much to stay away.."

There was silence for a while then, and he was afraid that the comms had broken or that his hearing had gone completely.

Something hit his face, some fine sediment, rocks were shifting. That must be where she went, because she sounded like she had a smile on her when she finally came back to him.

"You there, little Hawk..?"

"Nah, slipped out for some Starbucks.." He replied weakly. He didn't want to be awake anymore.

"Clint, you stay awake until we get medics to you, ok?" She said sharply, but her commands weren't really working anymore.

"Don't make me come kill you. Kind of love you too much to."

That got his eyes open and his attention firing.

Did she really just..?

"You.." Words escaped him, because she just said she loved him.

Not the first time he's heard it, but it's the first time since they broke up that she said it. Even when he'd say it in a joking way, or in a best friend way, she would NEVER say it back to him.

"I love you too, you idiot." She was laughing a little, probably at his reaction more than anything. "Sure, I was happy for you with Laura, I tried force myself to get over it all because I wanted to get over you. But I don't think I ever stopped loving you."

"But then.." She really had to stop cutting him off, but this time it was because she knew exactly what was coming and he was fine with that.

"Because, in our line of work, we can't love." She started, and he hummed a little to tell her to go on. This was keeping him awake, story time definitely would. "I wanted to marry you Clint. Wanted to wake up every morning to some pancakes and coffee with you. I wanted to be in your arms each night, wanted to be there through the good times, and help through the bad. But we can't do that sort of stuff. And you wanted it."

"I could've lived without it.. Could've just kept it as was.." He whispered back. That was always what he wanted, the reason for her walking out that day. But this isn't what he thought it would be.

"I didn't want to hurt you Clint." She sighed, but carried on before he could ask how she would. "I'm the Black Widow. I have a certain kind of skill set, Hawk. Even when we were dating, I'd see how jealous you'd get when I simply flirted with a target. I was afraid that I'd hurt you too much one mission and you'd just leave. I was afraid that I'd look over a bar while leaving with a guy and see too much hurt in your eyes, I was afraid.."

"Of being compromised.." He finished the sentence for her, and her sigh told him he was correct. "You know, we've been compromised since the very start. The second that I let you live, then you hit my shoulder instead of my skull, we were compromised."

"That's different.."

"Not really.." He sighed, hissing when he shrugged but forgot about the dislocated shoulder. "Coulson always said we'd be the death of eachother.. He knew, all the way back then, that we had eachothers number.."

"Smart man.." He could hear the smile in her voice. It comforted him. He was under the impression that this would be an awkward talk, but he was relaxed now knowing they'd be fine. Knowing they might have something if he gets out.

When you get out, you idiot..

"None of it would matter.." He mumbled to her, eyes closing, but not by choice. He was losing the battle now that everything was done. Now that his children were taken care of, now that Natasha knew how he felt, he was losing the battle. She was talking to him, her voice frantic again, but he couldn't make out words so he just went on as if she stayed silent. "Nat, even if you went off with a guy on a mission.. Even if you hooked up then killed or captured him.. None of it would matter. Because I'd still be the one to hold you each night, and the one to kiss you each morning.. And that's all I want.."

There were more words, but he was done for. He couldn't fight back the darkness anymore.

"You're all I want.." His final words before he let the darkness consume him. It was fine. He was fine.

He was, for the first time in years, fully at peace.

There was a light in his eyes. And he really wanted it to stop! It was too bright, it stung.

It would go from one eye to another, and he could just make out a black shape behind it. There was a familiar thump in his chest, an unnatural thump, an adrenaline shot.

"Come on pal.." The words hit him clearly, not through the comms, but the person was actually there. "Come on back to us, Romeo. We gotta get you out of here."

The light left his eyes long enough for him to pull them open a crack. He was still lying on the hard unyielding rubble of the once building, there was still a large piece trapping his leg. But his upper body was free. He could see the stars up in the night sky, could feel the cold winter wind glide across his face.

It took him a moment to focus his eyes, but when he did there was so much to look at. He only recognised three of the eight or nine frantic looking people.

Tony was in the middle, right in his view. He was the one with that damn light. He was still in his armour, just his faceplate up so Clint could see him.

Steve was to the right of him, not in the spangled outfit though which upset Barton to a certain degree. How amazing would it be for the first sight you see to be Captain America himself!? Though boring normal Steve would do perfectly at this moment in time.

To the left of Stark was the one face he couldn't tear his eyes away from.

Carefully, he reached up his good arm towards her, using his thumb to wipe away a few stray tears that slipped from her eyes.

"Natasha Romanoff crying..?" He croaked out, his hand falling from lack of energy. She caught it though, and held onto it tightly in hers with a slight smile. "I must be dead.."

"Not yet, but you will be if you don't shut it." She laughed, wiping her own tears with the back of her free hand. "You idiot, worrying all of us so much."

"Ok love birds, save it for the bedroom." Tony simply said, snapping his fingers to draw Clint's attention back to him. It worked, he needed things like that to be done to keep his attention going right now. "You're in bad shape, Barton. But we need you awake to move this so we don't do more damage. If you feel something's wrong, just say, ok?"

It took Clint a moment, but the words eventually registered in his mind and he gave a slight nod.

"Good man." Steve said with a smile, and he positioned himself at the large piece to shift it. On his own. Now THAT'S Captain America right there!

He looked to Natasha when her hand went on his chest, applying just the slightest bit of pressure. Then to Tony who was doing the same with his good leg. They were keeping him pinned down, damn it he only got free!

A blinding pain shot through him when Steve started lifting, and it caused a scream to rip through his chest and his eyes to screw themselves shut. Now he knew why they were holding him down! His body involuntarily tried move away from the pain.

"Easy Clint.." Natasha whispered in his ear, her hand still on his chest. Steve had stopped lifting. "Deep breaths, ok?"

He nodded slightly, and the lifting began again. He couldn't hold back the whimpers as his crushed leg was freed. It hurt more than being crushed.

"Life is old there, older than the trees. Younger than the mountains..~" Someone was singing his song, and it stopped a scream halfway out. A male voice, but Steve was busy.. So that left Tony.

He opened his eyes a fraction for the first time in five minutes to see the billionaire watching him, he had never seen the guy so worried, so upset. Yet, he was singing.

"Take me home..~" He continued, and Clint realised that he was trying to get him to join.

"Country roads..~" He sang weakly, and he could see a slight grin spread across Stark's face. He kept eye contact with him, something to stay rooted to as his mind and body went through the horrible task of being cleared of rubble crushing him. A hand was running through his hair, softly, Natasha.. She always knew that calmed him. "Take me home..~"

His team was trying to keep him calm, swatting away any impatient newbie who would try clear things, giving people the death look when they suggested just pulling him out to get it over with sooner. They were protecting him from any little danger, not only saving him.

He wasn't just lucky to have Natasha. He was lucky to have all of them.

"To the place.. I belong..~" It was off his leg, it was finally off his leg! So he allowed his eyes to fall closed. But he kept singing away. "West Virginia.. Mountain momma..~"

He'd be lost without his team.. Without his friends. Why the hell didn't he let them help sooner?

"Maria! We got him!" Steve yelled, and suddenly all the hands left him. He could hear Maria, and Natasha. But no one else.

"Barton, it's Hill." She said softly, and he swore he felt something prick his skin while she spoke. "We're going to put you back to sleep so we can strap you up and get you home. It's going to be alright."

It would be alright. He was going to live. He was going to have a nice little stay in hospital, then a doting stay with Stark and Pepper in the tower. Then he could go be with Natasha..

He felt soft lips on his, and without even having his eyes open, he knew exactly who it was. "You did so well, so well.. I'll see you in a few hours. Sleep well, little Hawk.."

He welcomed blackness this time, because it meant safety, it meant he was going home..

Take me home.. Country Roads..