I feel my writing here SUCKS, but I wasn't really trying to be good or anything, just randomly writing. I need to empty my backed-up brain on things not worm related.
Anywho, I stole this from- well, okay, I didn't steal THIS, I stole a prompt idea involving M&M's were cigs should be. And THIS happened. Enjoy. Ending fails, but meh.
Oh yeah, and this whole "story" is many random ideas of Bats. If you have any silly flomps, send 'em my way. I shall maybe make something of them.
Dick gets mighty confused about some stuff. As does O'Hara, but for very different reasons.
The Cigarette Pack
It started out innocently enough. A sudden notice of small inconsistencies. Commissioner Gordon had been a smoker for years, and always had a package of cigarettes on him. It was a known and accepted fact. Robin had never thought much about it whenever he and Batman were in his office or standing next to him. But when Dick and Bruce were invited over to the commissioner's house for dinner one day, Dick realized something.
Where was the smell? The house didn't have even the faintest lingering smell of cigarette smoke. And thinking back, Dick realized the office didn't either, nor Gordon. And they never had. But how could a man smoke and not smell?
He brought it up to Bruce when they left, wondering. Bruce simply said it wasn't their business. Which was true. What the commissioner did or didn't do with his lungs was his choice. So for a while, Dick forgot.
And then Joker tried to blackmail him and Robin was forced to take the commissioner and his family to a safe house for a few days while Batman hunted down the insane criminal. It was a trying and stressful time, most of all for Gordon. Yet not once did Robin see him reach for a smoke. And he realized that he had never actually seen the man with a cigarette in his hand. And again he began to wonder.
He tried to time it right. Waited until everyone had gone to bed. Made sure Bruce was Bruce and done with his nightly patrol. Double checked the guard rounds at the station.
It was nearly midnight when Robin swung down to the window of the commissioner's office. He pried open the frame quietly and slipped inside. Pausing for a moment to make sure no one had heard him, he hurried over to Gordon's desk. The man always had an extra pack in the top drawer, something Robin had noticed long ago.
The pack was sitting right at the front. It was old and slightly worn, but in good condition. Robin picked it up carefully. It rattled, as if it were filled with beans or something besides cigarettes. He opened the top slowly, almost afraid of what he might find.
"Hey!"
The guard's shout startled the colourful hero and he jumped, the box's contents flying into the air and raining down on him. The guard – Chief O'Hara, actually – paused in surprise at the odd shower. His surprise grew when he took in the familiar black and yellow cape, red shirt, and dark green leggings.
"Robin? What on earth are you doin' here, sneakin' around the commissioner's office?!"
"M&M's," Robin murmured quietly. O'Hara frowned in confusion. "It was M&M's. Always M&M's."
The officer followed the boy's gaze to the floor, now littered with candy. "Boy Wonder, are you alright?"
Robin raised his stare. "M&M's…" He stood silently for a few more moments before suddenly disappearing out the window.
"Oi!" O'Hara raced after him, staring out at the sleepy city for any sign of the teen vigilante. Fruitless, he turned back to the office and the candy still scattered across the floor and the desk. He shook his head. "I knew such a young boy shouldn't be out solvin' crimes. Poor kid's snapped."