Halo 4 Screwed Up Version
Chapter 6: Your Fly Is Open
Heyooo and welcome back to a new chapta
p.s. The boldness in this story is me talking to my self. Just to add comedy. Hopefully it helps. By the way there will be a little of script writing with me and my brain lol that's what the boldness is for. And I put lines to separate the the story and myself.
p.p.s. I also want to thank Jdniscool for being a fan of my halo screwed up series. I inspired him to make a Metroid Prime Screwed Up Version. I'm so glad I have fans. :D Thanks bro! :DDDDDDD
The scene starts off with Cortana looking at the "sun" and yes I put fucking quotations.
Cortana says something about a lot of reasons why the sun isn't real.
Then she finally says something about I will never know that if it looks or feels real.
Chief was of course loading his weapon, like seriously who gives a flying fuck about people loading their weapons.
Cortana turns around to see Chief and says, "...before this is all over, promise me you'll figure out which one of us is the machine."
Chief replies, "That would be you dumb bitch."
Lasky trips and falls while walking in while saying, "God dammit...anyways, what's your plan?"
Chief replies, "The Didact's vessel is at a docking structure south east from here. When we get out of here you get to ditch us and go through the roof.
Anyways what I mean by Outfinity going through the roof, I mean Outfinity would go leave the planet where the opening that sucked everything in like a breathing vagina.
Yes I said "vagina", get the fuck over it ladies.
I'm a man!
I say what ever the hell I want.
This is AMURICA!
Free country...well not anymore because of the fucking laws and the President and stuff.
What the fuck, this is Halo 4 Screwed Up Version.
This story isn't about politics, it's about randomness and shit!
Okay now back to the story. :3
Lasky says, "You know I was ordered to prevent you from leaving. I ordered you a Pelican and it's outfitted for full combat pursuit."
The Pelican slowly rises behind Chief and everyone was like oh ma gurd.
Lasky continues, "By the way I'm going to hang around back here in the ship."
Chief questioned, "Why?"
Lasky scratched the back of his head, "Well, the Captain made the bridge covered in shit and it smells like...um...shit so..."
Chief interrupted, "Yeah I know."
Lasky walks away.
Didn't even say "good luck".
He's a bitch.
Cortana smiled, "C'mon, Chief. Take a girl for a ride."
Chief got horny and fucked Cortana.
Brain: whoa, Whoa, WHOA! What the hell is wrong with you Neptin?
Neptin (me): What?
Brain: Dude you acting like a fucking idiot right now! First was Del Rio Shit Face, Breathing Vagina, and now Chief fucking Cortana? Where the fuck do you come up with this crap?
Neptin: Um.. . . . .. . . . . . .the Internet?
Brain: Oh okay. Keep writing.
After when they fucked, (still can't believe I wrote that) they got in the Pelican.
They flew off. (sarcastic moment: noooooo they walked off the cliff and the laws of physics decided to not exist)
Well the Didact decided to be a pussy and cover himself with some orange shield.
So Chief had to find a way to turn it off because it's never that simple.
Anyways...well...SKIP!
Holy dick diamonds!
Well what do you know, where at the ending cut scene of this level.
GET DA FAQ OVER IT!
I'M LAZY AS FUCK!
BITCHES!
XD
LOL
GDFSGSD
DAGFEHAEJFRSGJHRTSRJSRTJH
HEFHFD
GJSGJ
SGJG
SJ
GJS
GJD
KJ
Jesus, I need to calm down...
Chief deactivated the shields of Didact's ship and decided to commit suicide. (don't ever do this people I swear to God)
He actually didn't commit suicide.
Chief spreads out his arms,(I believe I can flyyyyyy, I believe I can touch the sky) then tucks himself streamlined to fall as fast as he can.
He then spins himself upright and uses his thrusters (mmmmm what kind of thrusters) to slow and land on top of the Lich.
If you don't know what a Lich is, then it's a bigger type of vehicle that the covenant use.
You know what?
LOOK IT UP!
Just go to for more information. :3
He crashes hard into the dropship and slides off the hull; unsheathing his combat knife in the nick of time, he stabs into the plating to stop his descent.
With some effort, John climbs back on the Lich.
Chief questioned, "Da faq is happening?"
Cortana replied, "idk lol figure it out."
Above them, the Cryptum (Didact's ship) plummets into the ground.
An entry point opens up, allowing the Cryptum access.
The ground parts to reveal an enormous Forerunner flagship (JESUS H. FUCK...sorry to offend christians), surrounded by hundreds of Liches. (or Bitches HAHAHAHA...NO)
Requiem's entrance (lol what kind of entrance) portal opens up, allowing the ship to leave for orbit.(dammit)
John, still aboard the Lich, observes as the flagship opens a portal into slipspace.
Cortana replies shocked, "They're jumping into slipspace! Get below deck!"
Chief answers, "Ain't nobody got time for that."
John activates his thrusters and leaps up, taking cover behind one of the Lich's fins.
The flagship and its Lich escorts raise their shields as they approach the rupture.
After the vessels have crossed the event horizon, the portal dissolves.
Cut to black. (racist much?)
Then Bob the Promethean Knight that Chief mentioned earlier in the story pops up and says, ". . . .. . . . . . . .. . . . ."
Well you know they can't speak.
Their fucking robots.
Then he disappears like Jesus. (OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH)
ThEn FiNaLlY the level ends while you hear Chief screaming like a little girl.
omg da faq is wrong with me...hope you enjoyed and don't for get to follow and fav and review :P