That´s What Little Girls Are Made Of...
Chapter Fifty-Two
EPOV
Placing my carry-on in the trunk of the rental car, I looked up to see my girl sitting on the steps chewing on her lip.
Bella wore a severe look of contemplation, making me wonder what was running through the pretty little head of hers.
If it was anything close to what I was thinking, it wasn't good.
This was the hard part.
Leaving...
My family...
My love!
That was always the hardest part.
Leaving!
The pain was almost crippling; it was like I couldn't breathe.
Knowing that my heart was being left behind in Washington had me feeling like an empty shell.
Slamming the trunk shut, it was time to put my feelings aside and concentrate on making this easier on Bella.
I jogged over to the porch and plopped down next to my girl. Giving her shoulder a nudge, I asked, "Penny for your thoughts, pretty girl?"
The last couple of days have been awkward for lack of a better word, but not uncomfortable. We did what we had to do to get through it. Granted, there was always a big ass elephant in the room anytime Bella and I were alone, but, outwardly, we never let it affect us.
This was due largely in part to me locking my door at night.
I decided to take Carlisle´s advice and set some boundaries for myself and Bella, but I took the coward's way out.
Okay, more like the fucking pussy's way out, but I didn't know what else to do.
That's my story, and I'm sticking to it!
Didn't mean I had to feel good about it.
The first night I heard Bella rattle the door handle to my room quietly; I nearly lost it.
The urge to rip open the door and pull her in to my arms was staggering.
I barely slept at all that night.
The next morning, I felt like shit, and looked the part to boot.
Understanding my dilemma, Carlisle gave my shoulder a squeeze, and reminded me that the ends would justify the means.
I sure as hell hoped so, but in the meantime, I would just have to keep reminding both my heart and my dick that!
Knowing that Bella was down the hall at night and not in my arms was the worst kind of torture.
My body physically ached to hold her; it was almost as if I was suffering from withdrawal.
Last night was the worst.
When the handle to my door rattled again, my heart nearly broke as I listened to her sniff quietly as she padded softly back to her room. I could only imagine how hurt and dejected she must have felt.
Looking up at me from under her thick and impossibly long lashes, Bella squinted her chocolate-brown eyes against the unusually bright Forks sun. She smiles, but it doesn't reach her eyes. "I´m going to miss you, you know." Bella said, closing the distance between us, and laying her head against my shoulder.
We sat there in relative silence; save for the quiet sigh that escaped my girl´s lips.
The air hung thick between us, so many unspoken words, yet neither one of us wanted to verbalize them.
Silly, beautiful girl had no idea how much she owned me.
If only she knew that I´d counting be down the days until my birthday, and each one be weighted with misery and longing for us to be together again.
Her statement held just as much weight as it always did, seeing how this is what she always told me every time I got ready to leave.
"I´m going to miss too, Iz," I said, wrapping an arm around her, letting my head fall on top of hers. "But look on the bright side, if you spend every free minute of your day looking for the perfect birthday present for a certain hot guy, then you won´t have time to think about it."
"You´re such a cocky bastard," she laughed, jabbing me in the ribs with her elbow.
"And you, my brown-eyed girl, have a potty-mouth." I flicked her nose playfully. "Do you kiss your Me-me with that mouth?" I was grateful that were able to somewhat lighten the mood, even if it was only for a moment.
My little kitten growled in a feeble attempt to scare me. Looking around to make sure her nobody was in earshot, Bella said, "Yes, and you, pretty boy, better keep your mouth shut, if you wanna keep that pretty face of yours intact."
"Yes, ma´am," I gave her a mock salute. "Your secret is safe with me!"
Yeah, I´m too sleepy for anything, but...please review! Thanks!
Hasta Mañana...
Krazi
xoxo