Ivy was pissed. Understandably, but still. Selina had seen Ivy angry before, but never like this and never directed at her.
"Stupid, stupid, moronic, boneheaded, so fucking stupid – " Ivy raged, storming around her loft like a hurricane. She'd long since given up living at the halfway house and had ditched her parole officer, going deep underground. Something Selina was grateful for. She wasn't ready to go home, not yet. Too many people knew where she lived, and the old apartment just didn't feel safe anymore.
"V, don't be mad," Selina said softly.
"Mad?" Ivy shrieked, whirling on her. Her hair swirled around her face in a violent red tornado and her eyes flashed. "Mad? You think I'm mad? I thought you were dead, Sel. Dead. Shot in the head, six feet under, dumped in the river, dead. And then, out of nowhere, I get a call. A call on a secure line, so I can't come and get you. Because you're my best friend in the world, and I thought you were dead, so of fucking course I would want to come and get you. But no, everything's fine, you say. You're just out of town, and everything's just fine. And now you have the audacity to tell me not to be mad?" Selina winced, the words ringing true. When she laid it all out like that, it really did sound bad.
"I'm sorry," she said lamely.
"Oh you're sorry. That makes everything better," Ivy snarled.
"Ivy, I – "
"No!" Ivy cut her off, clearly not ready to hear an explanation. "You don't get to waltz in here and magically make it better."
"I'm not trying to make it better – "
"I thought you were dead!" Ivy said again and for the first time Selina saw tears shining in her eyes. "You do not get to die on me, Sel. You're not allowed to die and leave me here without you." Selina moved towards her, arms outstretched, but Ivy knocked her hands away. "Don't hug me, I'm mad at you. Explain. Where did you go?"
"I was hiding," Selina lied, feeling guilt well in her heart. She'd already decided that Ivy couldn't know about Wayne. There was too much to explain there and Selina still didn't know why she'd even bothered saving him in the first place. "Gerard is double-crossing Falcone. I don't know how and I don't know why, but I walked in on him making a deal with Oswald Cobblepot."
"What." Ivy deadpanned, her eyes gong wide. "You've seen the Penguin? I thought he was just a ghost story."
"He's real." A real, hobbling, umbrella-toting sociopath. "And now they own me, both of them. I'm their pet reaper, and eventually one of them with decide that I know too much and then I'll be dead for good this time."
"Holy shit, Sel."
"I know. And I know I should have told you but I didn't want you getting caught in the crosshairs, especially when you just got out of prison."
"You've known about this since before I got out of Blackgate and you didn't tell me?" Selina winced. Apparently whatever had turned her into an open book at the Wayne mansion hadn't worn off yet. "God dammit sometimes you really are a moron. You should have said something sooner."
"I know."
"Then what was the phone call?" Ivy prompted.
"Papi called me. Gerard was pissed and he thought I could help. And Gerard…he beat the hell out of me. I thought he was going to kill me. So I ran." Selina brushed her fingers over the bruise on her jaw, her pulse jumping at the memory of Wayne's hand there.
"Jesus," Ivy said after a long silence. "You're really screwed, aren't you?"
"Basically." Ivy was quiet for a moment longer before she jumped to her feet, and Selina was reminded of how terrifying her friend could be.
"Not allowed," she said fiercely. "They're not allowed to take you. We're going to get you through this, Sel, you and me. Together, like we always do." She must not have looked convinced because Ivy sat down again. "Look. Between the two of us, we will keep you alive. We're the two smartest people in this city. And the two smartest people in the city don't get pushed around by a sniveling prick like Gerard. I mean seriously, what the hell is up with the whole genteel act he's got going on?" Selina smiled, happy to let her rant for a while. She was home. She was home and she was with Ivy and she was safe. For now.
It didn't take long for her mind to wander. Wayne hadn't stopped her from leaving, he hadn't even tried. Selina listened absently to Ivy, her body acting on auto-pilot as her mind spun back to escaping the mansion. No one called the police. Alfred was even waiting for her at the door with a backpack full of clean clothes. She sifted through it on the bus, wary of tracking devices, but it had seemed clean. Even so, Selina had stashed it in her workshop before coming to Ivy's. She didn't want to think about Alfred, or the mansion, or Wayne. She didn't want to think about how worried he'd seemed, or how wounded he had looked when she'd run away from him. I warned him, Selina thought darkly. All she ever did was run away. Why the hell did he ever think that she would stay with him? That she would want to stay with him? Selina shook her head slightly, trying to dislodge the memories and the pang of guilt in her chest. She should have never stayed that long.
"Nice wrappings," Ivy commented the next morning, nodding towards the white cloth binding Selina's hands and wrists. "You take boxing lessons while you were gone, babe?" Something like that, Selina thought wryly. "Coffee?" Ivy asked, pushing the mug across the table.
"What did you put in it?" Selina asked, smiling at Ivy's look of indignation.
"The lack of faith hurts me. Deeply." Selina rolled her eyes, bringing the cup to her lips.
"So I'm going to visit Gerard today," Selina mumbled into her coffee. Ivy raised a vibrantly red eyebrow.
"You're going to do what now?"
"I've got to, or he's going to come looking for me." It was a miracle that he hadn't called her in during her mysterious absence. Then again, he'd beat the living shit out of her and was probably busy trying to figure out where his assassin had gone to and why he hadn't been able to kill Wayne. Selina still didn't know what Alfred had done with the body, and now that she thought about it, she really didn't want to. Ignorance being bliss and all that.
"I'm coming with you."
"No," Selina said sharply. "He already thinks that I've told you everything and if you show up with me, it's just going to set him off." And Selina would really like to keep Gerard as calm as possible, lest they repeat their last encounter.
"The last time you went there, he almost killed you. I'm coming."
"The last time he was already mad and I got in the way." Selina winced as Ivy threw up her hands in exasperation. Selina was defending him and they both knew it, but she had no other options. Gerard and the Penguin owned her, and if she stayed away for too much longer, they'd come looking. She would not allow Ivy and the St. Bart's kids to get caught in the crossfire. "Ivy, I know what I'm doing – "
"Yeah? Because Miss I Know What I'm Doing got herself stuck in the middle of a gang war and almost beaten to death before vanishing off the grid for half a month. Maybe if you hadn't been such a fucking – " Her phone rang in mid-rant and Selina exhaled in relief. Saved by the bell. "Hi Harley," Ivy said, her whole demeanor suddenly changing, softening. Selina bolted down the rest of the coffee, taking advantage of her friend's momentary distraction and grabbed her bag, heading for the door.
"Tell the girlfriend I say hi," Selina whispered. Ivy's eyes narrowed. "I'm going to be fine, I'll be back in an hour, I'll text you when I'm there."
"I'm going to kill you," Ivy hissed, covering the receiver with her hand.
"Love you too. Bye!" Selina waved and ducked out the door, flipping her hood over her hair. She would be lying if she said that she wasn't nervous to see Gerard again. After all, their last encounter had left her bleeding on the street with her head almost bashed in. Selina texted Ivy when she reached the bar.
Get home safe. Ivy typed back. Selina pocketed her phone and pushed inside the bar, breathing through her nose to steady her heart rate.
"Papi," Selina said coolly.
"Hola Sel," Papi said, sounding almost as nervous as Selina felt. "Que pasa?"
"Fine. Gerard here?" Papi nodded, going into the back to get the gangster.
"Selina, darling!" Gerard burst through the door, grinning broadly. He looked like something out of a bad mobster movie wearing a swanky old-fashioned suit jacket and fedora. "So good to see you, just wonderful. You're looking well."
"You mean since last time you saw me?" Selina said pointedly before she could stop herself. God dammit she really needed to get her mouth under control.
"That was regrettable," Gerard said primly, dusting something microscopic off of his shoulder. "You do know my temper, love." That she did. "And your face looks to be just about healed." Selina had to strain to keep the pleasant smile on her face. That was it? Oh, it didn't look like he'd beat the hell out of her, so no harm no foul? Crazy, psychotic son of a bitch. "Although I think I like your hair better the old way," Gerard said as an afterthought. Selina wanted to scream. The 'new way' was letting it hang over the side of her face, the wavy dirty-blonde curtain covering the last of the bruises and disguising the ugly scar over her eye. Selina forced herself not to flinch as he reached for her, drawing her hair away from her face. "That's better." There was a beat of silence and Selina held her breath until he released her.
"I'll keep that in mind," she said, careful to keep her voice even despite her heart hammering against her ribs. "You know that I'm no good at this girly stuff."
"No matter," Gerard said with a sniff. "If you do your job, no one will look at you anyway. Oh, and before I forget, I have been looking for your orphan. Tommy Vasquez." Selina started at Tommy's name. With everything that had happened, she'd nearly forgotten about him.
"You found him?"
"Not quite. But I've got feelers out. If he's in the city, I'll find him." Gerard took Selina's hand in what might have been a parental gesture if he wasn't insane and hadn't tried to kill her two weeks earlier. "Anything for my favorite reaper. You'll be finding significant bonus in your account in the next few days as well."
"What for?" Selina said, feeling sick. Her stomach was empty, but even so it roiled.
"Just a little gift to show you that I care." Gerard said, sounding for all the world like a normal boss giving a run-of-the-mill Christmas bonus. She didn't want his money, not when she hadn't earned it. It was just another weight on her chest, another brand that proved that she was bought and paid for.
"You are too good to me," she said, ducking her head and hoping it passed for gratitude.
"You're like a daughter to me, lovely Selina. You know that." He smiled, preening, before pulling a jacket on. "I must be going. My intrepid business partner is waiting and he is not a patient man. Oh!" Gerard said, halfway out the door. "Do give my regards to Ivy. I think she'll be in my employ quite soon." With a little wave, he was gone. Selina stood frozen for a moment, his words crashing around her like blows. Crazy or not, Selina had never been more at his mercy. The promises to find Tommy, the money, the mention of Ivy… everything had been to prove that he owned her: 'Do what I say and I'll give you presents. Disobey me and I'll bash your face in.' Selina shuddered, cold despite the heat pumping into the bar.
"What the hell are you into, Sel?" Papi asked after a long, awkward silence.
"I can handle it." Selina responded quickly, lying though her teeth.
"Maybe you should get out of town, chica. Lay low for a while. There's a lot of heat on you right now."
"I'm fine, Papi," Selina insisted. "Don't worry about me. And don't let him hear you talking like that." Papi nodded, understanding. Gerard did not suffer traitors, or tolerate anyone he even suspected of being disloyal. "Adios, I'll see you."
"Take care of yourself." Selina let the door slam behind her. She was trying to take care of herself, but survival was quickly becoming a game that she didn't know how to play anymore.
Selina didn't go back to Ivy's right away; she was too agitated and another shouting match was the last thing she needed. Instead she looped back towards the Narrows on foot, heading back towards her apartment.
Miraculously, no one bothered her, despite the fact that she was alone, on foot, presenting an easy target. Part of her, a small, insane part, almost wanted to be jumped – she needed to move, she needed to fight, anything to rid herself of the ice-water crawling through her veins. Everything seemed sluggish and slow, the world filtering through a haze of anxiety and fear. Had it always been like this? Had the respite of Wayne Manor left her vulnerable to the shit-show her life had become? Or was it all finally catching up to her? Selina didn't know, but there wasn't anything to do about it. She had forfeited her life the second she'd walked in on Gerard and Oswald Cobblepot. Now she had to deal with the consequences, and accept that there were things she just couldn't control.
She could control her home address. Selina had needed to move for a long time; she'd been in the same place for over a year. It was time to go, long past time to go, in fact. The door to her apartment gave easily when she turned the key. There wasn't much inside, never had been. Selina hadn't accumulated much clutter and all of the clothes in her closet could easily be fit into a large backpack. Without thinking, she switched on the TV, remembering all the nights she'd fallen asleep on the couch, letting the voices and flickering lights lull her into unconsciousness. She still had a hard time sleeping without it on. Maybe that was why she hadn't slept much at the Manor. Or maybe sleeping in enemy territory was against every instinct she had. Regardless, it had been weeks since she'd gotten a decent night's sleep.
Cracking her knuckles, Selina swept her hair up into a messy bun, pulled on a pair of gloves, and got to work. She packed everything she couldn't leave behind and got rid of the rest. As two news anchors prattled on about the GCPD's war on organized crime, Selina destroyed anything in the apartment that could lead back to her. She ripped up bank notes, searched every nook and cranny for personal items (there weren't any), and wiped her prints off of every surface in the place. It took hours but finally she finished, and Selina collapsed onto the couch, exhausted. Reaching with gloved fingers, she turned the lamp off, and for the first time in weeks, slept.
Selina woke to the phone ringing, shaking her out of a nightmare full of gunfire and blood and dark eyes. She clumsily reached for the burner in her jacket pocket, but it was silent. Cursing, she stumbled to her feet, searching for the source. After a few frustrated seconds, Selina remembered the apartment phone. The number had come with the place and she never had it disconnected. To her knowledge, it had never rung before. Selina reached for the receiver, flicking the lights on. The sun had gone down while she was sleeping, and Ivy was going to kill her for not coming back right away.
"Hello?" Selina mumbled, unable to banish the sleepy hum in her voice.
"Sel-Selina?" It took Selina only a moment to recognize the voice, and suddenly she wasn't tired anymore.
"Wayne?" she managed through her shock. How the hell had he gotten this number and why the hell was he calling her? "Jesus Christ what is wrong with you? Don't call me again."
"Please don't hang up," Wayne said, and there was something in his voice that stopped her. Panic. "Something's wrong. Something's wrong with me. I…I can't breathe."