How I Met Jane Eyre

Hey guys, K.J.A. here. Just to let you know, I forgot to add on my last chapter, that from chapter's two and three, I added excerpts from chapter twenty-seven, because on here, I can do so. In this chapter I will be using excerpts from chapters twenty-seven, eighteen and sixteen from Jane Eyre, just so you know. Oh, sorry if chapter three was a bit of a flop, but I was having real trouble with writing it, but I hope you think that it's a good chapter, anyway. And now, on with chapter four.

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Chapter 4 – Blanche

"So what happened next, Papa?" Janet asked the second we had all resumed our places from the night before.

We had just finished a rather long and enjoyable breakfast. My children were joined by their mother today, who was better as I predicted, and to be honest, I do not know who looked happier to see the other between my wife and my children. We commented on how well she looked, and she gratified us with a smile, before she started asking about how school and college was going for the pair of them. Janet and Eddie gave their answers as best they could, but me and their mother knew that their minds were elsewhere. I knew what they were thinking about, of course, but I wished to prolong the story for as long as possible, despite Janet's frequent looks to me, her eyes demanding me to hurry up (for me and their mother had agreed that no one was to leave the table until we had all finished eating). Their mother kept on looking from Eddie (who was deliberately avoiding everyone's eyes), to Janet (who was fidgeting in her chair), and to me (who was looking at her with a half-amused, half-innocent smile), and kept repeating the cycle; demanding us to tell her with those clear, vibrant, intelligent eyes of hers that I loved so well; but me and my children told her nothing. As soon as we had all finished (Janet could not get out of her chair fast enough), Jane said that she was going into town and then would be working in her study, so we wouldn't see her until supper; so after we had bid her farewell – and I had told Mary that lunch for me and my children was to be held in my study – me and my children headed to my study.

"Hmm?" I said, looking at her with a questioning look, for she had startled me out of my thoughts.

"After you brought Bertha back to Thornfield, I mean," she elaborated.

"Oh," I cottoned on. ""Well, after that, I have to admit that I transformed myself into a will-o'-the-wisp as soon as I made sure that Bertha was safe, for I travelled to the Continent, to find the one thing I did not have, but what I most desperately wanted more than anything: for it was then that I began to search for the one thing I desired above all else, which was to seek and find a good and intelligent woman whom I could love –"

"But you couldn't marry anyone whilst you were married to Bertha, Papa," said Eddie.

"I believed that I could and ought, and was determined and consistent in my beliefs. I began to travel all over the world, but more often than not I ended up in Paris, sometimes in St Petersburg, and occasionally in Rome, Naples and Florence, more than any other places on the planet. I'm afraid, my dears, that I must tell you that it was not long before I began to feel disappointed in my search –"

"Wasn't there a face that pleased you, Papa?" Eddie interrupted.

"Oh yes, my son. There was many a face, sometimes a voice, that caught my fancy, but I would always find myself disappointed, and so, I moved on. I began to get reckless in not finding "the One"."

"What types of women did you go for, Papa?" Janet asked nervously.

"Oh, all sorts of women, Janet: from English ladies to French Countesses, and from Italian signoras to German grafinnen. I did not long for perfection in either the body or mind. No, the only thing I desired was for what suited me, which was the antipodes of the Creole. I then did something I am not proud of (even back then, I did not like it): I began to try dissipation –"

"What?!" my children cried, looks of shock-horror on their faces.

"Yes, it's true. I never tried debauchery – not once – which was Bertha's attribute, which I hated and hate. Rooted disgust at it and her restrained me much, even in pleasure. Any enjoyment that boarded on riot seemed to approach me to her and her vices, and I eschewed it, which I almost did for ten long years – but, I am getting ahead of myself here.

"Anyway, after almost a year-and-a-half spent overseas, being with women of all kinds: from waitresses and actresses, and even – dare I say it – prostitutes –"

"Prostitutes!" my children cried out again indignantly.

"Yes, another decision which I highly regret. Anyway, I was called back home on business, and as I travelled back, I ran into Eshton in London. He had become a family man a few years previously. He had three daughters, who were ten at the time. Back to the point, though; he told me that he had not seen Thornfield in a long time and that I should hold a Christmas ball and party there. At first, I was a little apprehensive (for what if he or anyone else found out about Bertha?); but after some persuading from Eshton, and for the fact that I really did not want to spend Christmas Day alone with no one but my servants – as well as her – for company, I accepted. I told Eshton to send the invites to his friends to come, and that they should all pack a bag for a one nights' stay. He was a little disappointed at this, but he understood that I wasn't going to be pushed on this matter. And so, the next day we departed.

"As soon as I got back to Thornfield, I told Mrs Fairfax – the old housekeeper at the time – that I was holding a Christmas ball and party on Christmas Day and that guests were coming. Eshton told me about his friends who would be attending with him through a letter: Colonel Dent and Mrs Dent, Lord and Lady Lynn; and then there was the Dowager Lady Ingram, her son, Lord Ingram and her two daughters, Mary and Blanche Ingram, the latter considered to be the Belle of the County, which was no lie.

"By the time my guests arrived, my servants had done a splendid job of making the drawing and dining rooms look festive for Christmas – for seeing as these were the only rooms we were using, it seemed foolish to decorate the rest of the house – for it was brilliantly decorated.

"And so they came. The ladies were splendidly dressed, of course, but Blanche outshined them all."

"What did she look like when you saw her that day, Papa?" Janet asked, not out of excitement for what she wore, but just out of mere curiosity.

"Well, she was tall, fine bust, sloping shoulders; long, graceful neck; olive complexion, dark and clear; noble features; eyes rather like mine, large and black, and as brilliant as jewels. Her hair was fine, plaited delicately, with the finest mass of jetty curls coming down the sides of her face that I have ever seen – please don't tell your mother that – which was raven-black, and so becomingly arranged. She was dressed that day, as I recall, in pure white, with an amber-coloured scarf passed over her shoulder and across her breast, tied at her side, and descending in long, fringed ends below her knee. She wore and amber-coloured flower, too, in her hair, which contrasted well with her jetty curls. I once again found myself being blown away by her beauty.

"However, it was not long before I found out that what she had in looks, she lacked in mind and personality, for she was not to my taste, at all. She was very showy and had fine accomplishments, which was true; she had a beautiful, powerful singing voice, which I heard that night as she sang and played at the piano, and I sang along with her. Everyone remarked that we had a fine harmony together; but as I looked deeper into her character that night, I saw that her mind was poor, her heart barren by nature; for she would find no joy in the natural beauty of things, rather, she would find those in grand parties and dresses. She was not good, nor was she original; for she would often repeat phrases from books, never had an opinion of her own and would always ask what other people thought. When she looked at my servants, I saw her looking at them with a sneer and a cold, hard look would overcome her features, which would make her look, just for the odd few seconds, as ugly as she was on the inside, before she would turn back to me and that ugliness would be gone, and yet I knew that it still remained within her. She did not know the sensations of sympathy and pity; and tenderness and truth were not in her character. It's amazing how one's view of another's character can change within a matter of hours, isn't it?

"As soon as that night was out, I knew that Blanche was not the one for me. What she had in outward beauty, she did not have in her heart. Besides, I picked up on the fact that she was not only after my money (I'm guessing that Eshton told everyone that I was wealthy), for she would often send flirtatious smiles my way that night and in the morning before they left. She thought that by doing that she would worm her way into my pocket – not the first woman to do that, but I'll get to that later – for she was not interested in my heart; and after that first night in her presence, I was not interested in hers. I kept those notions to myself, though; choosing to be polite in society and make everyone believe that things were going well between me and Blanche (although I told Eshton that Blanche had absolutely no chance of getting me as her husband). Many people there – Lady Ingram in particular – were thrilled at how well me and Blanche were becoming accustomed to each other; and after the party was finished, her mother tried to convince me, countless times, to get me to join her at her estate and other parties. This was a ploy, I knew, just to get me and Blanche closer together. I graciously declined – although in reality, I was glad I did – and so, the party split up, with me and Eshton parting ways as good old friends, as always. As soon as a few days had passed and I had sorted out more arrangements with my estate agents and tenants and checked in on how Bertha was doing (which was not well, for she was getting worse by the day, now), I went back overseas to continue my search for "the one". But that was not the last time saw Blanche."

"It wasn't?" Janet asked, surprised that I had said this. I smiled ever so slightly, laughing inwardly at my children's reaction as I shook my head in response to her question. "But I don't understand; if you were annoyed with Blanche, why were you not done with her?"

"And when was the last time you saw her?" Eddie asked, as curious as his sister was, now.

I laughed out loud at this and said, "My dears, it is you who are now getting ahead of yourselves. I will tell you all eventually, but I must not go out of the chronological order of events. Be patient. All will become clear to you in the end." My children looked disappointed at this, but they understood why this was, and allowed me to continue.

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So, that was chapter four. What did you think. Also, tell me, do you want me to write about a few more mistresses – if so, give me some more information, and I will try to do the best I can out of it – or do you want me to just write about the Celine Varens stuff. Either way, it works for me, but I just want you all to be happy. Much thought from you will be appreciated, and please could you let me know by tomorrow, because that's when I will be writing next. Please R&R, and don't be afraid to tell me what you think. Much appreciated. Thanks. K.J.A.