XI

ATRUM

Allison is back in town, which is good because she's safe at least for now, but god! He has been so stupid and careless something could have happened to her, he was so focused on Derek that lowered his guard on his senses he would have feel her near, he could have avoided all this, but he has no time for that, he must be quick and be over with it. She must think the worst of him after what she saw and by the way she screamed she was definitely upset, she didn't think he might really kill Derek, he didn't fight back after all, but why he didn't try to kill Chris? He's not like the other werewolves, he was willing to die and Chris just gave him what he wanted, there doesn't have to be any regrets, he's a hunter after all.

It is pitch black in the woods, he's in the thickest part, they must have stopped already to catch some air, with this weather they won't be able to get his scent until it is too late so he has some vantage over them though he still needs to be quick, it isn't safe to chase and bring to bay wounded werewolves, he's sure he hit the girl with an arrow but he's not so sure of the other two and one of them is really fast so it makes it more difficult for Chris to continue his hunt, but he can't wait until dawn, he can afford to have a newborn pack leader and other three wolves craving for revenge in a full moon day.

There are dark splotches on the snow ahead, they are almost invisible in the darkness but luckily he got a glimpse of them, he takes out his flashlight and aims the snow with it, it is blood, the drops are fewer and shorter than he thought, so her arm is already healing, it will be harder for him to track them down, at least he knows he's on the right way.

…..

She traces circles with the heel of her gloved hand over the tarnished crystal doors hoping to whip away some of the cloudiness but it is pointless, even if she could take the fog out she wouldn't be able to see inside. She hesitates before taking one arm out of her jacket, the freezing cold breeze makes her shiver as it hits her by the back as a frozen knife stabbing her kidney. When her bare arm is freezing and her teeth chattering she folds the other one beneath the cozy cloth making a thick layer of leather and fur that then she uses to break in through the glass.

….

Stiles looks at Derek, he lays on the table, his chests rising and lowering slowly…too slowly he can't help hating him, Derek is the reason why they all in this mess in the first place, all the times that he threatened Stiles, that time he almost chocked him to death, he isn't a good person, he murdered Allison's mom, but… He was disposed to release Scott, to end with all this without asking anything in return….Yeah Derek can be an asshole sometimes, ok maybe not just sometimes but did he really deserves to die? He definitely do, then why Stiles is hesitating anyway? He knows the only way to save Scott is to keep Derek alive but he can't help thinking that even if there was another way to turn Scott human Stiles still would try to save Derek's life.

Derek peaceful face suddenly turns into a painful grimace and Stiles has to look away.

"Interesting" Deaton says with a smirk.

"What?" Stiles asks puzzled.

"Seems like Chris not just wanted Derek to die but suffer as much pain as possible" The man stares at the agonizing werewolf with amazement, "He really hates Derek, I knew he would use something difficult for me to decipher but this… I must say I wasn't expecting this"

"You knew he was going to poison Derek?" Stiles frowns.

"Yeah I also knew you were going to bring him here" Replies the doctor casually sauntering in the room and rummaging through some drawers. "I was just hoping that maybe you wouldn't get in after all"

"What do you mean?" Stiles isn't getting anything.

"Everything is happening the way it should" The man says sternly and for the first time nor his eyes neither his mouth are smiling.

"You can see the future?" Stiles gaps, hell what else this guy can do?

"That's sounds so stupid, of course not… I just pounder the possibilities brought by the wind and some are stronger than others but… I must admit I hoped I could stop you"

"You didn't do much… You just let us in"

"I grant you that… it is true, but I couldn't help it, the odds weren't at my favor, in a way or other I would have ended helping you I just made the things easier for all of us"

The man takes a long white cylinder, a candle and in his other hand is a holder, he place them in the table next to Stiles and then stares at him hastily.

"What?" Stiles arches his brow.

"You must go now if you want to save him" Dr. D explains.

"I don't want to save him I want to save Scott"

Dr. D chuckles.

"What so funny?" God! He's sick of his condescendence.

"Why do you care so much about that boy?" Asks the man with a sharp look, he knows the answer already he's just trying to tease Stiles.

"Because he's my friend, and I have to help him!" Stiles mumbles feeling his ears burning with anger.

"Have… funny word… you say it as if he was your responsibility, you know? It doesn't matter how much you try when the people you love is gone there is no one who can replace them neither is a way to change what is done"

He's talking about mom, Stiles' cheeks burn, he's furious, shit!

"Yeah? Then I don't know why you got married then… I wonder something, did the possibilities say that Marin's mom would make you forget my mother?" Stiles shots back, he can't mess with his head he isn't doing this because of his mom, he's doing it because of Scott, Scott is his friend is a total different thing, he can't lose Scott but no because he lost his mom! He can't lose him because he's his friend, and friends help each other no matter what.

"You and that boy… the time will come when you both will see each other as enemies, but of course that's only of the potential scenarios, it will be funny to see if you still stay by his side then" Dr. D snorts "I hope I'd be around to see it"

What is he talking about? He didn't get anything.

"Anyway there is no time" Adds stepping next to Stiles. "Down town, in the park is a greenhouse I need you to pick the shadow of the flower"

"Which flower? Shadow? How in the hell am I going to get only a shadow?"

This is so confusing.

"An orchid, it is known as the queen of flowers in South-America, this particular species won't be hard to recognize when you see it you'll get why"

There is again the condescending smirk, Jesus!

"Ok, I need to find an orchid in a greenhouse inside the park, ok isn't that bad! I thought you were sending me kill a monster or something" Stiles chuckles.

"No, you wouldn't last against the flower's guardian, that's why I'm asking you only the shadow" Dr. D smiles devilishly.

What did he just say?

"Relax he won't show up, unless you touch the flower"

Stiles nods and shoves his hands in his pockets, hell! This is starting to get scary.

"Another thing" Dr. D stops him. "You won't be able to see it from this side"

Another random supernatural shit! Exactly he was waiting for.

"The lighter I gave you" The man points out.

Stiles puzzled stares at his left hand, he forgot he was holding it, yeah he said something before about darken a candle.

"Step two paces away from the light" The man orders.

Stiles saunters to his left, stepping between the light and the table where the candle awaits.

"Now try to light the candle" Commands.

Stiles turns on his…

"No!" Doctor D. Stops him.

"You really need one of this" Says taking a book from a drawer and showing it to him. "Listen I want you to stay parallel to the wall, I don't want you to actually light the candle but to darken it"

"I don't get it!" Stiles says frustrated.

"Stay right there, facing the pillar… well done, know reach your right hand holding the lighter"

Stiles still facing the pillar rises his hand with the lighter slowly cranes his neck toward the table at his right, there is the candle and behind is his shadow portrayed in the wall…darken…a…candle, something clicks inside his mind, it sounds odd almost too weird, but let's face it, after seeing your best friend turning into a frigging monster over and over and a beating heart sprouting yellow slime-like blood over what remains of a ribcage, this doesn't sound so weird after all.

Stiles rises his hand again and his shadow does too, but this one's is overlaid by the candle's, he spins the lighter's wheel, instantly his fingers feel the warm touch of the flame just inches ahead, while his hand aims toward the pillar but the shadow of the lighter has above a gauzy shape like a plume that flickers as the flame on Stiles hand's, he moves his arm forward in the air, and his shadow does too, and then the plume touches the candle's wick and it lights on or darks off? Holy...

"How… in the" Stiles stars but Dr. D beckons him to remain silent.

"You're about to get in the Atrum, it is the shadow of this world, there are three different levels, the umbra, penumbra and the antumbra, there are four different ways to get in, you're about to use the most common of all of them, when you're in there the people in this side will only be able to see your shadow so you must be careful to not scare anyone"

"My shadow?" Stiles says thrilled, "It's like a parallel world hidden within this?"

"No, as I said is the shadow of this world, you're getting through the penumbra, it's the side of the Atrum that is deeply connected to this world, they are bound to each other in dawn and the link fades in twilight, you must be careful to not let the candle to completely burn or else you will be trapped in there"

Stiles tilts his head and stares at the physical candle in the table, the wick is still and unlit, yet… there is wax streaming down the surface of the cylinder, it is unbelievable and shocking…. It is amazing!

"When you're ready to come back to this side all you need to do is light the real candle and the shadows will be casted away, understood?" Doctor Deaton finishes and stares at him sternly.

Stiles nods a little dazed, it is too much information to handle.

"Go then" Doctor Deaton hurries him.

"How?" Stiles asks arching a brow.

"Burn your shadow with the candle" The man explains with some sneer that made Stiles' question look like the silliest in the world.

Hesitantly Stiles rises his hand watching his shadow imitate him, slowly reaches the top of the flickering shadow-flame and touches it with the tip of his middle finger.

"I'll take care of Derek while you're gone, hurry up" The man urges him again.

A chill spreads through his body and he feels a sudden urgency to throw up, his head spins and his ears pop, the world sways in zigzag for a couple of seconds and the it suddenly stops. Stiles blinks the blurriness away from his eyes and looks around, and his head spins again, he can totally get it, he feels like being in two places at the same time, as if one of his eyes staid in his body and the other is attached to the wall, he is still on Dr. D's basement but at the same time in a quite different place, is like looking to a picture's negative, there are only shadows around yet Stiles is able to get a glimpse of every single detail including the light's bulb now emanating pure darkness or Dr. D's dark shape and Derek's on the table, they are not flat shadows as he probably is right now but yet there are no eyes or mouth it is all black, it is scary and amazing at the same time, is like being able to see in the darkness perfectly.

Stiles steps ahead tentatively, and he don't falls, good! He can do this! Approaches the table where a black candle awaits in its holder, the wax streaming down as gloomy tears, he takes the holder and looks back and there is a sound, an annoying muffled sound behind him, but he can recognize it though he feels like hearing a song backward and then he realizes that it must be Dr. D trying to tell him something, god! What could he have forgot to say? Whatever it is he better texts it to him, wait a second… Does his phone get signal in this shadow world?

….

Allison wedges below the broken door, being careful to cut her nape with the shattered crystals. When she steps in, the wind burst inside in a whistle that gives her Goosebumps, she's inside a large unlit room, all she can see is darkness, she lights up her cellphone's flashlight and looks around, at her left there is an small desk with a computer, more wind comes in and lots of documents fly around scattering on the floor. She walks ahead her footsteps echoing, making her feel uneasy, she's tempted to scoot back, to get home in her warm bed and forget the whole thing but she can't she knows she can't do it, she won't rest until she finds out if that man's words are true and Derek…

She shakes her hand, it can't be true….it just can't! If her mom was murdered by Derek her dad would have killed him earlier, right after coming back in town, or even the night he brought her home, her dad wouldn't wait, no one would have waited to put an end to all this mess.

She saunters around the shelves, there are rows and rows of them, the wood of what they are made is black and polished, the air smells like rotten wood and dust, she suddenly feels like being in a church, like if she just broke in a holy place, it is disturbing and scaring. There are books everywhere, in every corner in every stand and every wall, even in the upper floor she can see tons of them, she recalls the times when she used to get in the libraries to take some books with her to home and read, read lots of stories, she had to learn to read fast when she was younger because they never staid longer than a couple of months in a single place, it was a long search for a new home, no she understands that actually was more like runaway from everything.

In the far end of the room are computers, at least thirty desks with computers over them, there are many websites that offer newspaper's archives in their database but let's face it, Beacon Hills isn't the most famous town in the country and she doubts she might find what she's looking for on them, so it seemed like a better idea to come here first, she's tired of blind search and trial and error, she wants answers and want them now!

She addresses the desks, in a corner attached to the wall there are three bleached computers that seen pretty old, those must be the ones with archive, hesitantly she sits in the first's chair and turns on the screen.

….

Being in the shadow of the world is like being trapped in a dream, Stiles can't stop feeling like waking up and drifting away instantly, air isn't hot or cold in here, the ground is black and the sky white, as he said before is like living inside a picture's negative. In his right hand he carries the black candle which is lit and darkens everything around with its bizarre black energy.

Maybe it's just his imagination but he feels like the streets are longer and narrower in this side, the houses and buildings are all black from outside as if he were watching only their shadows, it is overwhelming and beautiful, in a gothic and scaring way. He keeps walking down the avenue, god! He will take him forever to get to the park, but he can't use his jeep, there are some human like shadows starting to get out of houses and buildings, the town is waking up and people would freak out if they get sigh of a self-driving car in the streets with a shadow of a teenager on its wake.

There are certain things that he have been avoiding to think but now that the euphoria has vanished he can't stop thinking about them, like… Who is Dr. D? How's that he knows this much about Derek and Stiles and Scott? And all the creepy things he said earlier that Scott and him will become enemies or all that mojo thing about knowing that they were coming over. There is a lot Stiles doesn't understand and the more he thinks about it more questions come like… Is he a binder? Like Deaton? If he is then…. Were his parent's too? What is a Binder anyway? Did her mom knew all this would happen? No… it wouldn't make sense, what about his dad? He's still alive, and they are back in town in the exact same week in which all began.

But of course it wouldn't make sense, his dad definitely doesn't know anything about binders and werewolves, or else he would have believed in Stiles when he said that Doctor D. Shoved him from the cliff to not mention the fact that he thought Stiles was crazy or that just left to visit his parents in a full moon's eve.

Now Allison in other hand… her dad is a hunter, that's what Doctor D said, and you don't need to be a genius to know what it means, he knows about all this stuffs which is startling Stiles couldn't even react when Deaton told him it is just too much information, suddenly the whole town knows about all the shit that has been going on the past three months and everyone seems like playing a part in this mess, and speaking of messes…. Derek killed Allison's mom, Stiles isn't sure why it bugs him so much, Derek is annoying and moody and hates everything and everyone but he can't see him like a murderer, is like trying to picture in his mind a totally different person with the same grumpy cat face.

So there must be an explanation why he murdered Mrs. Argent, if Allison's father is a hunter then his wife was too, maybe they tried to kill Derek and he fought back… why he cares anyway? It is none of his business though he can't help feeling pity for Allison does she knows? When her mom died anyway? There are so many things he hadn't ask her, but how? They never have time for talk, there always something in the middle, like being chased by fanged friends or saving douches' lives, but something is definitely certain, Allison doesn't know about werewolves and how her mom died, she said Derek was nice after all, so whatever her dad is into she doesn't know anything about it, now… should Stiles tell her everything?

Stiles calculates forty minutes since he came out of Dr. D's place thought he's not sure, because his watch and cellphone both froze, at least he finally reached the park so he is in good time, at the end of the street he gets sight of the walkway and the benches before the black trees. It starts snowing when he steps inside the park, the snowflakes slowly fall, they are grey almost fully dark like coal, the sight of them against the clear white sky is depressing and astonishing, if he could bring a camera in here, though he doubts it works considering that it would try to capture the reality casted by a shadow maybe it would make a beautiful….something.

The green house in the center of the park, Stiles hadn't see it before, so maybe in only exist in this site, it would explain why it is the only thing in the shadow world with color besides Stiles himself, it is an small structure with crystal walls and wooden door, he gets in, there are two long rows of planters packed with dead flowers from all species, there are a rotting reek in the air that makes him shiver, he feels like walking in a graveyard, he's about to ask himself how in the hell he will know which flower he is looking for when he see it. At the end of the room in a single pot is a shining thing not shining but flaring and not thing but… a bud, with long yellow petals and a pink core, Stiles sprints toward it and then recalls what Dr. D said about a guarding and stops short. The man said something about getting the flower's shadow, he just needs to find it and take it with him, as he expects there is no shadow itself but a fume-like shape below and slowly dances, as Stiles approaches closer it starts feeling a warn in his chest, a sweet scent intoxicates him in seconds and an urgency to crack in laughs of joy takes him over.

He shakes his head and looks around, there is no music he must have been imagining it, slowly wedges his hand below the bud and feel how the fumes lick his hand, tickling him, he curls his fingers around the petals and tugs it out, there is a short and high pitched screech right in his ears but maybe he just his imagination again, he looks at his candle, it is half burnt, he better hurry ups to come back, he's not sure if he can light it on now or maybe the flower's shadow will fade if he doesn't get it with Dr. D first, so he rather to come back first.

He gets out of the greenhouse and starts darting back to Dr. D's house, there is something seriously wrong happening with the candle the Binder gave him, it is burning too fast, he's sure it hadn't left for so long, or at least it what he thinks until he looks up and finds the sky slowly darkening, the sun is rising –how ironic- Deaton said he could keep Derek alive for two hours or so, but if the sun is rising already…. Shit! Stiles strides away from the park and gets in the avenue, there are cars already driving down the street and a couple of people walking by the walkway, so he must get out of here, if someone sees him they will definitely call the Ghostbusters or something like that, he needs a place with many shadows, so he quickly flinches from their sight and takes the first corner he finds, he's near the grocery story so… yes! As he thought there are more people walking down the streets which means it is already dawn, the time must move quicker in here, he blends into the crowd of shadows making sure to not stumble with any of them he's not sure if he can touch them but he doesn't want to find out, he starts running down the street, he must be quicker, Derek will die if he doesn't hurry up! His lungs burn as he strides faster and faster, his forehead gets damp within minutes, the world around spins in long strands of black and white and green… green?

Stiles stops short and cranes his neck to his left, outside the entrance of a building is a man sitting in the steps, not a bulgy dark shape like the rest of the shadows but a fully human being, has a long beard to his chest, wears a dirty green shirt with squares and bleached blue jeans, his grey eyes are fixed in the nothingness while his lips move at high speed thought no sound comes out of them, what is this man doing here?

Stiles scoots a couple of steps and stares at him, the eyes of the man don't move at all, boy reaches up his hand and swings it both way in front of him, is he blind?

Then suddenly the man sneezes.

"Cheers" Stiles says automatically which is stupid because apparently the man is in a state of…

The man lets out a high pitched yelp and jumps on his place, his eyes are now fixed on Stiles, Stiles stuns and stares at the man right back in his eyes, but they are no longer there, his whole body is darkening being sucked by the blackness until he turns into a black shape like the rest, the rest of the shadows suddenly stumble and dark heads look around confused, there are muffled moans and screams and the man's shadow looks in all directions as disoriented and then strides away from them.

"What do you think you're doing?" Doctor D's voice says angrily behind him.

"I…I don't know…. I just saw him and… Who was him? A ghost?" Stiles asks puzzled and shocked to see Dr. D in there. "Wait! Is Derek…?"

Deaton shakes his head and relief washes over Stiles, relief? Oh god!

"I was concerned you might get lost in your home town" Dr. D replies with sarcasm.

"It isn't my fault that the time in here moves faster" The boy says irritably.

"I'm sorry… we better get going" The man says sternly and beckons Stiles to follow him.

"So what was that guy?" Stiles asks as they walk down the street.

"A human" Dr. D explains dryly.

"Then why…?" Stiles starts but Deaton interrupts him.

"As I told you there different levels and ways to get in here, wiccans used to come here making a circle of candles during solar eclipses to gather herbs, thought it was pretty dangerous considering that eclipses lasted only a couple of minutes and they had to be back by then or else would be trapped in penumbra until the next eclipse, and eventually end in the umbra as that man you just saw"

"So… that man was going to die?" Stiles says getting Goosebumps to just the thought of it.

"Worse" Dr. D snorts.

"Worse? What can be worse than dying?" Stiles asks frowning.

Deaton Chuckles and Stiles reddens. "Can you imagine a world where everybody hates you? Where you are less than garbage? Where even your family despise you?"

"Are you telling me that…?" Stiles starts.

"Now… imagine a world where you're a nothing… where you are no one, when people don't notice you exist neither care, a world where there is nothing for you not even love or hate" The man explains slowly.

Stiles tries to picture the idea in his head to get what he's saying.

"Who you think would be the luckiest?" Dr. D asks wryly.

"That's what happened to him? He was no one?" Stiles says shocked.

"He was someone…once" Dr. D smiles with sadness. "Three months ago he got ill…" Begins the doctor.

"Ill? What did he have?"

"He got the flu"

"The flu? The flu can bring you here?" Stiles says shocked.

Dr. D shakes his head. Ok he's officially lost.

"He was a man with a job, a marriage a life…this changed few months ago, his wife left him for another man, at his work they barely noticed his performance he was practically dispensable for the company, weeks after his wife left with the kids the checks stopped coming, then he got sick and he always sneezed…you know why people say cheers?"

Stiles shakes his head.

"Is a way to wish good health to others… if many people wishes you good health their determination is what will make you heal" The man smirks sadly.

Jesus!

"That's why famous people often survive to chronic diseases, the love and the goodwill what keeps up safe, but when you don't have anyone who cares or recognizes your existence, well…"

"You end up here?" Stiles says astonished.

"Yes and no" Doctor D corrects him.

"As I said, there are four ways to get in here, the first one was the used by the wiccans to gather herbs, nowadays is used by terrorists to smuggle it is known as the black market, the second is the new version of that ritual which is the one we just used, the third way isn't actually coming in but stay in contact through a Ouija table, people can contact the others on this side which is useful when you're trapped in here, or in my case to scare teenagers, the last one is the one that man used to come here, leaving everything behind, believing that no one knows you exist until you really don't"

"But I don't get it…. I could see him" Stiles says with frustration.

"Of course you could, he was in his last state before getting in the umbra when you actually believe you don't exist… he couldn't see you because he thought he wasn't real he was already fading until you committed that foolishness" Replies the man harshly.

"I didn't do anything stupid I was just curious about him that's all and he is back in the real world is a good thing!" Stiles says hopeful.

"Isn't a good thing at all, you shouldn't intervene in things that aren't your business have you ever heard of something called the butterfly effect?"

"How can you know so much about him and don't do anything to help him?" Stiles grunts chewing his bottom lip.

"He was my friend, he did this to himself by neglecting his marriage, for putting his work before everything even his health, it was the price he had to pay for the choices he made"

"He has a second chance now!" Stiles says defiantly.

Dr. D suddenly stops and looks at him with wide eyes and the continues his walk.

"What is inside the umbra anyway?" Stiles chances the subject, the guy is safe he doesn't want Dr. D to change his mind in saving Derek or worse to, light off his candle and trap him here forever.

"Nothing" Dr. D says sternly his eyes fixed on the street.

"How nothing?" Stiles says overwhelmed.

"Nothing is what awaits for those who're trapped being nothing itself… you don't die because you don't exist"

A shiver runs down Stile's spine.

"Fade away and not be remembered, no one missing you, or crying for you not even thinking about who you were and the things you did…just… nothing…vanish without leaving your mark in the world, is a fate worse than death don't you think?"

….

She has been reading the whole paragraph over and over, her cheeks are stick with all those tears and her eyes are so swollen that is hard for her to read, yet he keeps doing it, there must be another explanation, another way she's missing a word, something that suddenly changes all the meaning of the story into a car accident, but there is no mistaking the words dismembered and forensic makes her gag, makes her want to scream, to cry loudly and kick the screen, she knows her mom died twelve years ago but it hurts! It hurts so much! She doesn't remember much about her now but it is killing her inside, the truth is so painful, so horrifying. According to the newspaper her mom mas murdered by an unidentified animal, her body was found dismembered in the woods and the forensics examinations would give more details about it, such details must be in more recent newspapers for sure, but… is she strong enough to dig further? Her dad lied! Lied to her about everything… every single detail of her life is a lie! Lie! Lie! Lie! Lie! Derek killed his mom! That son of the bitch is the reason she doesn't have a mother… And Stiles is helping him is trying to save his life right now! She hopes he dies…No! She hopes he doesn't die! She wants him to live… so she can kill him herself.