Charlie wasn't sure how they'd ended up on the couch or when, but she didn't care. All she cared about right now was kissing the woman lying by her side. Her hand slides under Joey's top, coming to rest on her side. This was beyond her wildest dreams, she had hoped but never truly believed that she'd be able to touch Joey like this again and not have her run away.
"What are you thinking?" Joey murmurs, unwilling to take her lips too far from Charlie's.
"That this is some dream I'm going to wake up from."
Joey gently caresses her cheek. "It's no dream Charlie. I love you and I want to be with you."
"Are you sure that your decision isn't just a reaction to what happened to you today?" she asks, needing to dispel the last lingering doubts.
"I knew this morning that I couldn't continue with my marriage."
"I was so worried I'd blown it with letting Shandi stay."
"Shandi confused things for a moment but even if you two were together, I knew I still had to end things with Angelo, I've known that for some time." She sighs. "It was never going to work for me and Angelo, we married for the wrong reasons."
"How do you mean?"
"It was an arranged marriage."
"You're kidding!"
Joey smiles wryly at Charlie's surprise. "I know it's kind of old fashioned but it's not so weird for my family. My grandparents and parent's marriages were more marriages of convenience, yet they grew to love each other and I already loved Angelo as a friend, so I thought I could do this. And it's not like I rushed into this, I thought long and hard about it and then dad found out about his illness and said how happy this marriage would make him. After that, I just couldn't say no. It sounds kind of pathetic now but I wanted to make my father's last days happy."
"It's not pathetic. It's not something I would do, largely because I'm not bi like you and couldn't be with a man like that, but I understand why you did this."
"Everything was fine leading up to the wedding, at least I told myself it was, then one fateful night I met this amazing woman who turned my life upside down."
"I regret the confusion I've caused for you, but I'm never going to regret that night."
"You asked me once if I regretted that night and I avoided answering, because the truth is, I did, but only because being with you made it so much harder to be with Angelo." Charlie stays silent, taking it all in. "From the morning of my wedding to recently, I've used the promise I made to my father and the commitment to my vows to convince myself to stay with Angelo and the hardest part is, that I do believe in my vows. The moment I agreed to the wedding, I committed to it fully and I intended to be a wife in everything, except having children. Before the marriage, Angelo and I already had a friend's with benefits thing going after we'd sought comfort with each other after we'd both had rather nasty breakups, so I didn't have a problem with the sex side of things, it was even enjoyable at times during the marriage, but it wasn't the same, because," she snuggles closer to Charlie. "That night, you showed me what I had always been missing with sex, for the first time, I felt what it was like to make love, to truly feel passion and even after I thought I'd never see you again, you invaded my dreams and I had to remind myself over and over how important my vows were to get through and it worked, I even managed to convince myself I was happy in this marriage, until you went and torpedoed all my hard work to push you from my thoughts by walking back into my life."
"You're the one who walked back into mine," Charlie points out lightly.
"Yeah I guess I was and when I saw you standing there, it made me realise I'd made a mistake agreeing to marry Angelo."
"You could have come to me earlier."
"I felt trapped. I'd made promises and a commitment and I do love Angelo so I didn't want to hurt him but now I realise that if I stay with him, I'm only going to end up hurting us all. There was also my father to consider, he was so happy the day of the wedding but I guess I'm going to have to disappoint him now."
"How can your father be disappointed after the sacrifices you've made?"
"It's not just that. Our families have been friends for years and this is what both families have always wanted and dad's always seen Angelo as a son, even more after Brett's death."
"Joey, you agreed to the marriage to please him, you've tried to make it work but it hasn't and I would hope that your father wants what is best for you and wouldn't want you to stay in a marriage that doesn't make you happy."
Joey smiles and brushes her lips over Charlie's. "It's nice to finally talk to someone about this."
"You never talked to Aden about this?"
"Considering his feelings toward Angelo, he'd have told me to run for the hills before I got myself into this mess." She sighs heavily. "I hate that I have to hurt Angelo."
"He understood this was a marriage of convenience, didn't he?"
"Yes and I was always upfront with him about my reservations and feelings before the wedding and that it was mostly to please my father, the problem is though, I've come to realise that this marriage means a lot more to Angelo than it ever did to me. I love him but I've never been in love with him not like he is with me, hell, he even wanted kids, though he knew I didn't."
"Telling him it's over isn't going to be easy, I know that, but knowing the reasons for this marriage and your reservations entering into it, this really shouldn't come as a surprise to him."
Joey shakes her head sadly. "I have made such a mess of all our lives."
"No Joey, this isn't just you. Angelo, your families wanting this marriage and even I have helped to create this mess, not just you."
"You're not to blame for any of this Charlie."
"I didn't make it easy for you Joey and I did help to add to your confusion, especially by making moves on you."
"It is a mess though and not just our personal lives, there's your job to consider and how this will affect things for you at work when Angelo finds out about us."
"Joey, as long as I'm with you, I can deal with whatever is thrown at me."
"What about people's reactions to us? A married woman leaving her husband for another woman is going to be juicy gossip once it gets out."
"Ok, I'm not exactly relishing the gossip, but we're together and that's all that matters." She frowns as an unwelcome thought intrudes. "Are you trying to talk yourself out of us?"
"I love you Charlie and my future is with you, it's just that we have a lot to talk about and to consider."
"I know and we'll do it together."
"Together, I really like the sound of that."
"So do I," she says with a smile. "I'm just so happy right now."
"So am I. For the first time since that night, I feel like I've finally found my place and it's with you." Joey leans in, pressing her lips briefly to Charlie's, before resting her forehead against hers. "Charlie, until I tell Angelo it's over, I don't feel right about us making love, but, um," she blushes.
"What is it?" Finding her sudden shyness adorable.
"Can you stay and just hold me tonight?"
"I'd love to."
Opening one eye, she groans at the time glaring back at her from the clock. It was still early, but considering everything that had been racing through her mind when she'd finally gotten into bed, Joey was surprised she'd slept for this long. She smiles when she feels Charlie pressed against her back, her arm draped over her waist. Charlie's presence probably helped her to sleep so soundly. It had felt so natural to fall asleep in her arms and waking up with her so close, felt wonderful, it's just a shame her stomach didn't feel so wonderful right now. Feeling rather nauseous, she slips as gently from Charlie's embrace as she could, the nausea growing as she gets to her feet. Covering her mouth, she bolts for the bathroom, barely reaching the toilet before she was throwing up.