Day 13 - Bow & Arrow: tumblr user makapedia's "Black*Star is Maka's protective, older, adopted brother" AU – seriously, I implore you to read all that she has written on this, it is golden.

This triple date was, for the most part, a shit show of epic proportions.

Why he had agreed to go on a date with his freshly ex girlfriend who he was still madly in love with and her stupid brother (and his best friend) who was the reason for the break up in the first place, Soul didn't even know.

Black*Star had screamed that this was a brotatorshipNOT a brorocracyand Soul needed to get his shit together and stop trying to "get it in" with his little sister. It was a no win situation where someone would inevitably get hurt but Soul didn't want to come between the siblings. He did the kind thing, the noble thing, and told Maka that they should just remain good friends.

Maka hadn't taken it well. She didn't cry or scream or give him a concussion with a book. No, Maka had a quiet sort of rage that shook Soul to the core. I understand, was all that she said.

Soul was a dead man walking and they both knew it.

She went through a parade of boys with a vengeance. Every day of the week was another athlete, another date, much to Soul and Black*Star's horror. Skirts were getting shorter. Actions were getting bolder. There was hand holding and giggling and right now it was literally the worst kind of torture to have to pretend to be interested in another girl while he watched the girl he really wanted flirt with a guy– not him– three inches away.

"Maka, I love your dress," Tsubaki, the only sane person at the table, said.

"Thank you, Tsubaki!" Maka trilled.

The scrap of floaty material that Maka called a dress was giving Soul high blood pressure. Black*Star looked close to stroking out right there in the diner but he knew that he reaped what had he sewn and even his "Godly" status could not save him now.

"Tsubaki, could you tell Maka to pass the ketchup?" Soul asked, half because Maka wouldn't look at him but mostly because he was being a complete brat. "That is, if she can pull her attention away from Jock-y McTestosterone over there for one second."

"Tsubaki, could you please tell Soul to grow up and also brush his hair because he looks like a hobo?" Maka replied coolly.

"Tsubaki, could you tell Maka that she doesn't have the tits to fill out that dress?" Oh good, he had reverted back to twelve year old Soul who could only show his affection by insulting Maka.

Her eyes narrowed. Black*Star excused himself to "take an hour long piss and Tsubaki, come get him when dinner was out". Soul thought his "brotato chip" was the biggest traitor of all. "Tsubaki, could you please tell Soul that his jealousy is not very cute?"

"Tsubaki, could you–"

"Excuse me," Tsubaki said tersely. "Perhaps Soul and Maka, you two should excuse yourselves and talk about whatever is bothering you?"

Maka folded her arms over her chest petulantly. "Why should I–"

"Good idea," Soul grabbed Maka and dragged her to the parking lot outside. She elbowed him in the side, hard, but Soul didn't let up until they were alone. "We should talk."

"I have nothing to say to you," she said. "You made your choice now you have to live with it."

"Come on, don't act like this was an easy thing," Soul ran his hand through his hair. Did he really look like a hobo? Uncool.

"What do you want from me?" Maka was finally losing her cool. If Soul made it out of this without a hospital visit, it would be a miracle. "You told me you just wanted to be friends. So we're being friends! You're just going to have to deal with the fact that I'm going to date other people." She narrowed her eyes again and Soul felt his penis retreat into his body in pure, unadulterated fear. "Don't even pretend that you're not loving all of the attention you're getting from yournew cheerleader girlfriend."

He snorted. "And you're calling mejealous?"

"Shut up!"

"And what's with you looking all hot for this stupid date?"

Maka opened her mouth and then closed it, unsure if that was a compliment or an insult. "I said shut up, Soul!"

"Make me."

When Black*Star came back to find Soul and Maka missing, he was worried. It was possible that his little sister had snapped and finally murdered Soul and the blood would be on Black*Star's hands. He knew what he had to do, even if it killed him to do it. He was their God of Love, their Cupid, the one who wielded the mighty love arrow. It was time to make things right.

He rounded the corner to the parking lot with Tsubaki in tow, prepared to bestow benevolence unto his followers and allow them to date. With rules, of course, like no playing "hide the sausage" because ew.

Black*Star watched in horror as Soul and Maka made out in the parking lot behind the diner. His best friend had his sister pressed up against a brick wall and Black*Star thought he was going to blow chunks right then and there. He started to stomp towards them to tell them to cut that nasty shit out when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"I think we should leave them alone," Tsubaki said sweetly.

"But–"

"I said," Tsubaki repeated and Black*Star knew this was not a suggestion so much as a command, "let's leave them alone."

"… yes'm."