'I never knew that I could be this way
I never knew that I could walk away.'
'Stay with Me' - You Me at Six
¢нαρтєя тωєηту-ηιηє: тнє ѕє¢σηd dєƒєαт
Their trail wasn't hard to pick up, but Eaglestrike was sure he would have been able to catch up to them without it. Parting clouds revealed the sun to be dipping below the horizon once more, dull and lifeless like usual. An entire day had slipped between their paws, one they would never be able to get back. Glancing over his shoulder he caught Littleflame's upset expression and felt guilty. It wasn't really her fault, but she had let them go.
"Why would Icepetal drag Rainpatch along? She knows he's ill," he broke the uncomfortable silence with a quiet question.
Littleflame looked miserable. "They'd lied about him being sick. Rainpatch was just acting. It gave them the opportunity to make sure we stayed in the tribe's territory long enough for them to sneak away. I'm sorry," she pleaded, "that I couldn't stop them. I tried, I really did. But they wouldn't listen."
"Did they say anything to you before they left?"
"Only that they were going to bring back Willowclaw, or die trying." Littleflame's words settled like a rock in his stomach. Die trying. He believed that they would. Icepetal's bond with Willowclaw was far too strong for her to just leave him behind without a fight. If those two made it to the tribe they'd die, so would Willowclaw. The Chosen wouldn't make it if there were only two. Crimson would be left to rule for all eternity.
"Fox-dung! We could have been out of the tribe's territory by now!" Eaglestrike spat. "What were they thinking!?"
Apollo sidled up to him, "probably something about how useless you are." At his glare she hastily added: "that's not my opinion! I think you've done a great job so far."
He snorted with a shake of his head, choosing to disregard her comment. "I've managed to get one of us caught, and then lose two others. Right now I find it hard to believe we're even going to make it out of the tribe's territory alive. Tornheart would have known what to do."
"Tornheart's dead, Eaglestrike," Littleflame snapped. "She can't help us anymore."
The reddish tom flinched, and then licked her cheek. It wasn't her fault he was stuck in the past, reliving the moment where they'd left the oath-taker to die. "I know that, but she would know what to do."
"What's the point of even trying if you know you're going to fail? Have some faith in your teammates, and in yourself, idiot," Apollo chided, face set in a hard expression. Her tail swished out of agitation, though her eyes kept flicking ahead of them as if she could see something they could not. Her apprehension frayed Eaglestrike's already short nerves.
"You kind of sound like a mother sometimes, Apollo," Littleflame discreetly moved to a different subject. "Do you have kits?"
There was no way either Clanners could miss the agony that flitted across Apollo's face, the way it pooled in her intelligent eyes. She looked away to where the last pale rays of the sun were fading, slicing across the grasslands. "I did, but that was a long time ago. It's not worth talking about, so let's just forget it and move quicker."
Littleflame chirped, "I bet they are lovely! Do you see them often?"
"Shut up!" Apollo rounded on Littleflame with a feral roar. "Kits are weak and mine weren't any different! They weren't strong enough to even make it to their apprenticeship! So, just, shut up about it, okay!?" Her lips were curled back to bare her pointed teeth, claws ripping and tearing the grass beneath her paws.
"O-okay," Littleflame shakily agreed, fur along her spine bristling.
Eaglestrike only blinked. The more time he spent with the Apollo the more he saw her facade slipping, the edges growing fuzzier with each passing moment. He wanted to know now more than ever just who she was. There was a niggling thought at the back of his mind that told him she had an ulterior motive. Why else would she want to travel with them?
Apprenticeship. What Apollo had said sparked his curiosity. Only Clan kits moved into apprenticeships when they were old enough. He glanced at the white-furred she-cat, trying to imagine her hunting and fighting for a Clan. All he got was an image that shocked him: her sitting on a pile of bodies, blood gushing down like a waterfall. He shook his head, dislodging the thought before he could dwell on it anymore.
So deep in thought he was that he nearly missed Apollo's barbed question. "Do you want kits someday?"
Littleflame's eyes widened. "W-well as a she-cat, and a Clan warrior, it's m-my duty to make sure the C-Clan has another generation. So, yes, I-I suppose I do."
"You'll have kits just because your Clan demands it!? What, you'll just throw yourself at some tom claiming you need to produce another generation? That's ridiculous," Apollo scoffed.
"It's not like that!" Littleflame exclaimed. "I want my Clan to survive for seasons after I'm dead, and if having kits is a way to ensure that then I will! It's a responsibility I accepted when I became a warrior."
Apollo just sighed, bounding forwards a few paces. "I don't think I'll ever understand you Clanners," she proclaimed, "you're all just so weird."
You were one once. The comment was on the tip of Eaglestrike's tongue even though he wasn't sure if she had been. "Don't pass off our lifestyle as weird," he went with instead, "it's ours and we chose it because we wanted to. I was born a Clan warrior and I'll die a Clan warrior, proud of the things I've done for my Clan."
"Don't you worship dead cats in the sky?" Apollo arched a brow.
"We never worshipped them, just believed that they were there," Eaglestrike sighed. "No one wants to worship evil. I wouldn't expect you to understand what those 'dead cats in the sky' have done for so many moons."
"Then just stop believing in them?"
Littleflame made a sad noise. "It's not easy to just stop believing in things you've seen with your own eyes."
"Don't you dare say something like 'the dead walk among us'. That's just grossly cliché," Apollo rolled her eyes.
He wasn't angry at her for not understanding their way of life, but her refusal to even understand that they were different was hurtful. There had never been a point in his life where others had questioned his beliefs and his actions; he'd never had to explain to other people why he chose to live like he did.
Biting his tongue to avoid making the situation worse he turned his gaze to the grasslands before him, searching desperately for two feline figures pushing through the grass. Their scent was still strong, though it had been difficult to pick up after leaping over the rushing stream. Its banks had burst, gray water no longer gurgling but roaring. His stomach growled loudly, and he looked sheepishly at the other two.
Littleflame pricked her ears, pausing with one foot raised, nose twitching madly. An ear flicked, and then she was gone, diving down into longer grass. He nearly shouted out to her, only to inhale deeply and catch the scent of rabbit on the air. A slight smile curved his muzzle. If there was one thing Littleflame could do, it was hunt.
Squinting he spotted her bright pelt, crouched in the grass. She moved with ease in her hunting crouch, slithering towards her quarry with a snake-like grace. This was Littleflame in her element. This was her doing what she felt confident doing. A breath of wind stirred, and she pounced, hurling herself with precise aim at the hidden rabbit.
A scuffle ensued, grass flailing wildly as the she-cat finished her kill, cutting of the rabbit's death squeal. "Here," she mumbled upon returning, prey dangling from her mouth. "Empty stomachs won't help anyone."
"That was some great hunting," Apollo purred, nabbing a mouthful before the others.
Eaglestrike nodded in agreement. "At least we'll be well fed."
"As long as the prey keeps running," Littleflame mewed sheepishly.
They ate in silence, scarfing the fat rabbit down in famished mouthfuls. He couldn't quite remember the last time he'd eaten; it must have been at least two days ago. The thought made him feel guilty, cats would be starving back home. Prey rarely survived a forest fire. So he held back, let the others have their fill, content to suffer a little longer. If the others noticed they chose not to mention it.
His anxiety grew stronger as they moved further towards the tribe's camp, each step forward reminding him that they had yet to even spot Rainpatch and Icepetal. Eaglestrike was no longer angry with them; he just wanted to find them alive. He couldn't describe how terrible he knew he would feel if they died.
Apollo and Littleflame spoke in hushed whispers not once trying to even draw him into their conversation. He was grateful for that. For the first time since he'd left the valley he found himself thinking about his family. Running for his life hadn't given him time to even ponder whether they'd be worried about him. Another surge of guilt. His mother would be mourning the loss of her only son not knowing that he was trying to save them all.
"Look!" Littleflame prodded his flank and nodded towards the horizon.
There, moving swiftly through the grass, was Rainpatch and Icepetal. The tom didn't look to be in any pain at all, trotting along without a care in the world. Eaglestrike couldn't stop his pelt from bristling, hurt that they'd lied to him.
"Let's go stop them," he muttered, accelerating his walk to a steady lope.
Icepetal heard them almost immediately, spitting something at Rainpatch before spinning on her paws to hiss at them. Her aggression surprised Eaglestrike. They weren't enemies, were they? He hoped she didn't attack them.
"Please!" Littleflame cried, "Just listen to him!"
"If what he has to say is anything along the lines of 'stop what you're doing' then I'd rather not," Icepetal snapped back. Her tail was lashing, eyes narrowed to slits. Beside her Rainpatch stared confidently, though Eaglestrike thought his stare looked a little sad.
"We need to talk this through," he began.
Icepetal laughed, "No we don't. Rainpatch and I have a plan; we know what we're doing."
"Oh, a plan? Does your plan accommodate the army of tribe cats your about to go up against? Have you forgotten what they did to Willowclaw's soldier friends?" Apollo calmly spoke.
"Shut up! What are you even still doing here? You aren't one of us, just some loner tagging along for the fun of it. Get lost," Icepetal spat.
Apollo arched a brow. "I'm allowed to be here," she retorted coldly. "Willowclaw was my friend too."
"You don't agree with them do you!?" Eaglestrike turned on the white she-cat with a growl.
"Of course I don't, idiot, but that doesn't mean I don't want to save him. He's a good cat, and he doesn't deserve to be imprisoned for moons, but I'd rather not get him and I killed in a botched attempt at a rescue," Apollo explained.
Rainpatch scratched at the ground. "I can't go on knowing we didn't do a damn thing to save him, it's just not right."
"Dying for it won't help," Littleflame said quietly.
"If it means I tried then it's worth it," replied the WaveClanner.
"No!" Littleflame protested, "we can't defeat Crimson without you!"
Icepetal made a noise in the back of her throat. "Exactly! We can't kill Crimson without each other, that's exactly why we need to save Willowclaw! We need him, and he needs us!"
"Oh, I'm sure that's the only reason you want to save him," Eaglestrike sneered sarcastically. She just glared at him, lip curled back to bare pointed teeth.
"You'd make sure we'd go back if it was Littleflame."
"Not if put all our lives at risk!"
"I think your hero complex is going to your head."
"Stop! Stop fighting!" Littleflame forced her way between Eaglestrike and Icepetal, cuffing both their heads sharply. "How do any of you expect to survive if all you do is fight!? We're supposed to be a team remember? Teammates don't lie, or sneak off, or hide things from each other. I think you're all forgetting that we hold the fate of the world in our paws!"
Icepetal scoffed, "you're starting to sound like a medicine cat."
"That's not a bad thing to be, if it means being wiser than you," Littleflame hissed.
"Weren't you just talking about not arguing?" Apollo inquired.
Eaglestrike sat down, his head spinning. Everyone was shouting, arguing, snapping. Surely this wasn't what Tornheart had in mind when left them? Did she know just how dysfunctional they'd be? Her last words haunted him. "Look after each other as if you were a family because you've only got each other from here on out."
He cleared his throat, "Littleflame is right. We can't keep fighting amongst each other; it's not what...it's not what families do. We can't tear each other apart over this."
"Family?" Rainpatch breathed.
"Family!? Don't be stupid, we aren't a family! We're a walking mess on a suicide journey!" Icepetal shrieked. "There's no way any of us will return home!"
Apollo rolled her eyes, "not with an attitude like that you won't."
"Enough. I believe that we can do this, even without Willowclaw. But," he added hurriedly, "we will come back for him, I promise, Icepetal. As soon as we're done with Crimson we'll come straight back here to get him. He knows we will; he knows you will."
"I'm not going back for Willowclaw!" Icepetal screamed. "I'm not going back for him!"
Rainpatch furrowed his brow, glancing at the distressed she-cat with concern. "If we're not going back for him, then who are we going back for?"
"None of you would know," Icepetal's voice was hoarse, "because none of you visited. I wasn't dead, you know, I could still hear everything that went on around me. That's why I knew you," she snapped at Eaglestrike, "were lying when you said Willowclaw never came to see me. He came every morning and every night just to sit by me and talk. But he wasn't the only one."
A silence stretched broken only when Littleflame prompted gently, "who else visited?"
"Fuhren, and that bastard daughter of his."
"Why did Fuhren visit you?" Eaglestrike can't keep the surprise out of his voice, but, in his defence, the tribe leader rarely showed any of the other Chosen any attention. His eyes had been firmly fixed on a certain dark tabby the entire time, as had the eyes of his daughter.
Icepetal squeezed her eyes closed. "He showed up every day without fail and kicked Tau out. I think his daughter was there most days as well. H-He spoke about how he knew who we were, that we were the Chosen, the ones Crimson was after." Eaglestrike could feel dread pooling in his belly. "She'd made a deal with him, Crimson, that if we were to ever pass through his territory he was to keep us and let her know. Why do you think he made such a fuss about you saving his tribe?"
"I just figured he was bluffing, I mean, what idiot would just invite Crimson into their camp? There wasn't really much I could do any way, breathing was painful enough, and I couldn't move my body no matter how hard I tried. The stuff he said to me, it started to get strange. He spoke about his mate, about how much I looked like her, even though he kept saying his daughter was the spitting image of her," she shivered. "He was going to keep me, force me to stay, kill all of you if he had to, just to have me. I was to become his mate, or something."
Her voice grew hard, a growl vibrating in her throat. "So I'm going back to tear his insides out."
"Can't you just kill him when we come back?" Eaglestrike's suggestion was meek. He couldn't believe that the leader of a tribe could say such things to an injured cat, especially one that didn't belong to his tribe.
"No! I need to kill him now!" Icepetal snapped.
Rainpatch brushed his muzzle against her neck, "we can take them all on, but I'd rather do it with the others; might stand more of a chance in bigger numbers."
"You don't understand!"
"Then make us!" Apollo demanded.
"He did it. He summoned Crimson, told her he had us. I can't leave Willowclaw to die at Crimson's claws knowing that I could have saved him. It will kill me," Icepetal's voice wavered and cracked, revealing the true depth of her feelings for the arrogant tom they'd left behind.
Eaglestrike's eyes widened. If Crimson was on her way they had little time to get Willowclaw out of the tribe and to safety. He groaned inwardly. The plan had been to come back for him after they'd beaten Crimson instead of facing an entire tribe. But he knew Icepetal was right. They couldn't leave Willowclaw to face Crimson's wrath alone. He needed to be rescued.
He opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by Apollo. "We can set up a distraction for Crimson, make it look like we all escaped," she meowed frantically.
"Hey, hang on. We're going back to get him aren't we?" Rainpatch cut in.
"Excuse you? I still don't find the idea of having my fur ripped off by a bunch of tribe cats' very appealing, thank you very much. Even less having it ripped off by soldiers as well. Have you all forgotten the likelihood of us all dying if we go marching into the tribe's camp demanding Willowclaw back? I haven't. We can save him without endangering our lives, much," she sniffed.
Icepetal's fur bristled, "I'm not leaving him."
"Goodness me will you just stop and think for a second? Unless I heard incorrectly, you're all prophesised to do something big, right?" When they nodded Apollo continued, "Then you need to stop thinking with your hearts. Others are depending on you doing everything to fulfil your prophecy, don't forget that."
Eaglestrike found himself pinned under the sharp, questioned gazes of the remaining Chosen, waiting for him to make a decision for them. He knew Icepetal would hate him if he chose not to save Willowclaw, but he couldn't risk all their lives, not when they had such an important duty to fulfil. He hated admitting it, but what Apollo said made sense. They all needed to stop thinking with their hearts and use their heads.
"I know what you're going to say," Icepetal sounded exhausted, "and I'm going to follow you, but if Willowclaw dies because of this decision, I'll kill you."
He just nodded mouth suddenly dry. Looking at Apollo he said, "Tell us your plan."
Apollo grinned. "It's simple really. We need Crimson to know that we escaped, but we need to be far enough away that she can't catch up to us. There are five of us, that's enough to pull this off. We'll get her attention by leaving our scents all over the place, then meeting back up in one place to get out of the tribe's territory. Muddling our scents enough should give the impression that all five of the Chosen escaped the tribe, not four."
"What if Crimson goes back to the tribe?" Littleflame asked.
"I doubt Fuhren will be willing to give up Willowclaw whilst the rest of us are under the impression that the tribe will keep him safe," Apollo assumed.
Rainpatch sighed, but he was smiling a little. "Sounds risky."
"It'll be worth it if it works."
"Okay," Eaglestrike rumbled. "Let's do this."
They spread out, with instructions not to venture too far, spreading their scents over everything in their path, interlacing and weaving their scent trails together to create a mess. It would appear to anyone sniffing around that they'd been in a panic, hurrying around with no clear goal, backtracking and losing their way as they struggled to get back into unclaimed territory. It was risky; this plan of Apollo's, but it was also genius. Eaglestrike found himself marvelling the she-cat once more, but he hadn't forgotten her sudden attack.
Partway through their scent-laying, Rainpatch came scurrying towards him with a very worried expression, Littleflame tagging along behind him. She kept looking over her shoulder fearfully, tail twitching uncomfortably.
"What is it?" he kept his voice down, waving his tail to catch Apollo and Icepetal's attention from where they stood on a low hill.
As they made their way towards him Rainpatch answered, "She's here."
"Wait, who?"
"Crimson!" Littleflame spoke in a horrified whisper, "with a really big patrol, just over that hill over there!"
Icepetal skidded to a stop. "She can't have gotten here that quick."
"Do you want to go and have a look? Why would I lie about this?" Rainpatch muttered. "Honestly, she's over there and we need to go. Littleflame and I left scent trails all over that area; she'll catch them in no time."
"Time to see if your plan is going to work," Eaglestrike said to Apollo, his tone dark.
As if in response a yowl rang out through the quiet of the night. The Chosen snapped their heads in that direction, ears and noses twitching. Eaglestrike recognised the familiar scent of Crimson's soldiers and knew it was indeed time to go. "Come on, let's get out of here and hope she doesn't see through our plan."
"Don't forget what I said," Icepetal growled.
"I'm not going to," he replied grimly.
Turning away from Crimson's advancing patrol the Chosen, and Apollo, ventured further away from the tribe's camp, over the river, past the set, drawing further and further from one of their own not knowing if they'd ever see him alive again. Eaglestrike found that he'd learned something dangerous. He could walk away and not care.
an: i like this chapter because sassy apollo. i hate this chapter because i think it's rushed. eeeehhh i don't know how to author.