Kris pressed the heel of his hand against his eye. He had to calm down. Tao had only said those things because he was drunk, very very drunk. He took several deep breaths like his mother had taught him when he was a boy. He pulled on the pair of jeans that were next to his bed and shot a glance in the mirror as he looked for his keys on the dresser. He didn't have time to fix his hair, he had to get to Tao. The clock read three fifteen. From what Tao had been telling him over the last year the manager kept the same schedule and would be in between seven and nine depending on whether they had dance practice.
Kris was a few towns over at his Grandmother's house. It would take him two hours to get to the dorms, which would leave him with at least an hour to see Tao and get out without being caught.
He left a note on the counter for his grandmother that read simply Panda problems, be back soon. Love YiFan.
His Grandmother had know that he loved Tao before he did himself, she had always been good at that sort of thing. Kris loved her very much. He had come to stay with her at times after his Grandfather had passed and after Kris found out he had myocarditis he had grown extremely close with the old woman.
When he first told her about Tao it had been after that first kiss. The alcohol still in his veins as he cried into the phone, sure that he had ruined everything with his best friend. She calmed him and when he finally stopped crying she had laughed.
I had assumed love was not your style.
She was right and it hit Kris all at once, he loved Huang Zitao. If only he had been able to say it out loud.
He jogged to his car and pulled out quickly. He watched the speed limit but not too closely. He could shave a half hour off his trip if he kept it just above legal.
He was worried about Tao, he had been since their contact had been strained by his schedule. He had tried to tell himself that Tao was fine and he shouldn't worry too much, but the call tonight had given him proof that he did need to worry. How often was Tao not sleeping? Was this the first time he had gotten drunk because of it, or just the first time he had called?
The tears filled his eyes again and this time he let them fall. This was his fault. Not just for leaving, it was his fault for ever becoming involved with the boy in the first place. His fault for letting himself fall.
The road stretched on infinitely ahead of his car. Each minute felt like an hour as his panic grew. His chest was hallow and it felt like his heart might fall through to his stomach and dissolve. As he entered town it picked up to thud against his chest. He hadn't been back this way for a while.
He turned his headlights off several streets down from the dorm and parked two blocks away. Sneaking into this building was noting new for Kris. If you sneak out of somewhere you better be able to sneak back in. It had been he who had taught Luhan and Sehun how to steal the managers car.
He climbed up to cracked window, pushing it open just enough to slide his body in.
"Tao." He whispered into the empty room as he got his feet on the carpet. He looked around the room which was much darker than the outside. He pulled his phone out to use as a torch and saw that it was only four thirty. Maybe he had gone a little faster than he intended. He shined the phone on the bed silently hoping that Tao had gone to bed while waiting for him. The blanket was in a pile against the fall on the far side of the twin mattress, no Tao. Shit.
He sneaked as quietly as he could into the hall toward the kitchen. Barely breathing as he went passed Xiumin's room. He was an unbelievably light sleeper. It was fine in the morning when they had to get up early to go places, but when you were trying to be sneaky at night it was the worst. The times he had caught Kris leaving Tao's room was only equal to the number of times he had seen Xiumin go into Chen's room instead of his own.
Kris reached the kitchen and didn't see anything at first. He held his phone out ahead of him, he caught sight of the glass that had shattered on the ground, and then Tao's phone and shirt on the table. Why was his shirt off and where the hell was he?
As he moved closer to the table the smell of booze got stronger. The table was wet and Tao's shirt was soaked. He had evidently knocked the bottle over and tried to use his shirt to wipe it up. He heard a sniff from the table and one of the chairs scratch slightly against the floor.
Kris crouched and the acid stench hit all at once. There on the ground, shirtless, crying, and balled up next a puddle of his own vomit was Kris' little panda. He sat and moved a chair out of the way. Tao looked at him and wiped his mouth.
"I think you had to much Panda." He said and stuck out a hand.
"Don't call me that." he hissed as he batted Kris' hand away.
Kris wrapped his arms around his knees.
"Why are you even here?" Tao bit as he laid his head on chair. He wiped his hand on his pyjama pants and closed his eyes slightly.
"You asked me to come Zitao. I...I was worried about you. I wanted... I needed to make sure you were okay." Kris rested his head on his knee.
"Well I am so can go," a tear falls down the side of Tao's face and he wipes at his face again.
"Tao you are not okay. I'm not leaving until I can talk to you. But first you need to get cleaned up." He stuck his hand again and this time Tao grabbed it, climbing out from under the table. "You go take a shower and I'll get this cleaned up," he said gesturing toward the table with a slight sigh. Tao nodded and made his way toward the bathroom.
Kris grabbed the broom and swept up the broken glass. He dumped it from the dustpan into a trashbag where he also pushed Tao's shirt. There was no washing that combination of smells and stains out, Kris would by him a new one if need be. He mopped up the vomit and washed the tabletop with dish soap. This unfortunately was not his first time cleaning up this sort of mess in the kitchen. Nor was it his second, or his third. As long as Xiumin kept bringing alcohol into the dorm, members would keep drinking it.
Thinking back now, Kris realized he had never had to deal with Xiumin in this situation. He had never even seen Xiumin drink outside of the few after parties he had attended. He had started to think he kept replacing the booze because he enjoyed messing with people while they had excruciating hangovers. Kris' heart went out to Tao, he was in for some hell from that bastard tomorrow.
He went to Tao's room and grabbed him a new set of pyjamas , he was sure those pants should be thrown out like the shirt had. He walked them to the bathroom knowing Tao wouldn't have locked the door drunk or not. Wordlessly he set them on the counter, pausing for a half second. Part of him expected Tao to invite him in like he always had before, but things weren't like they were before. With that sharp pang in his heart he exited the bathroom.
He walked down the hall back to Tao's room and sat on his bed, he needed to get his thoughts together. Tao would be out of the shower soon and Kris had no idea what to say to him. He didn't even really want to talk, he just wanted to hold his panda and let his warmth pull the alcohol from his system and save him the pain he was in for in a few hours.
At times like this he really wished they had those stupid powers. Tao would freeze time and he would fly them somewhere warm in the day and cold at night. It was cliche, he knew it, but that didn't stop it from being a nice thought.