Tao let the water run over him, hoping that the sound didn't wake anyone up. Explaining why the kitchen reeked of barf and bourbon was one thing, explaining why Kris was in the dorm in the middle of the night cleaning it up was a task Tao wasn't sure he was up to. He ran the washcloth quickly over his body, he wasn't in the mood to spend too long in here. Only, he didn't want to get out either. He could only assume that part of the talk Kris wanted to have with him involved being scolded for be so careless. Tonight felt strange, he prayed it was just the alcohol, but part of him thought that this felt like and end. It played out like a sad movie in his head, Kris would lay out a list of all the reasons they couldn't be together, they would have one last kiss, then Kris would crawl out the window and Tao would be left with a hole in his heart and no other proof Kris had ever come.

There was also the part where Tao would cry and the part where He wasn't entirely sure he was done throwing up. In fact he wasn't.

He leaned over placing one hand on the shower wall to steady himself and the other on his stomach. His whole body shivered and heaved as he ejected whatever he had eaten that day mixed with the large quantity of alcohol he had consumed in the last few hours.

After rewashing himself and letting the water pull his bile down the drain he exited the shower.

He wasn't surprised to see the clothes on the counter. Even though he hadn't heard Kris enter, he knew the hyung would not let him put dirty clothes back on.

Tao didn't even bother to dry off before slipping on the fresh clothes. He brushed his teeth to get the acid taste out of his mouth, grabbed the other pants off the ground and trudged down the hall back to his room, occasionally using the fleece garment to wipe stay drops of water off his forehead. He would toss them in with the laundry later.

He hesitated outside his door hoping he was still drunk enough to lessen the hit he was sure he was about to take. He twisted the handle and tossed his pants at the clothes hamper before turning to Kris.

"I threw your shirt away."

"That's cool." Tao almost wanted to laugh, this whole night was ridiculous.

He still didn't move from the doorway, he still had the whole scene playing on repeat and getting a little worse each time through. In this run there was no last kiss, no sugar-coated list, just Kris leaving him.

"Tao, you...I...it's just that I...you see it..." Kris let out a defeated sigh and pressed his hands against his face.

Tao shut the door and walked over to Kris taking a seat next to him, leaving just enough of a gap that they didn't touch.

"I didn't ever want to hurt you. I had to go though, and if I told you you would have stopped me...again."

"You've said all this before YiFan. I'm not mad that you left anymore." Tao's voice got softer as his sentence went on and he stared at his feet instead of at the person speaking to him. It was a nervous habit that had gotten him in trouble when he was younger but that now people found cute. He still hated it, he thought it made him look weak and fragile. He cleared his throat and spoke again still not facing the older boy but this time careful to keep his voice at a steady volume.

"Kris calling you tonight was a mistake. I'm drunk and tired and I just...maybe you should leave...for good.