20. Taking Things Seriously
Darren's POV on chapter 21 of As a White Knight on His Steed
...
Do you know what's better than sleeping on a pillow-top mattress, or a featherbed, or a cloud? Sleeping on Chris.
I would have been perfectly content to stay there forever, but, unfortunately, my comfortable resting place began jostling me none-to-gently.
"Darren. Alarm. Morning. Get up," Chris grunted.
As I groggily rolled off him, Chris grimaced. He dragged himself stiffly out of bed, groaning as he shuffled toward the bathroom. I felt a momentary pang of concern, but soon drifted back to sleep with my head buried in the pillow that smelled so deliciously of Chris's shampoo.
I was reawakened by Chris shaking my shoulder. "Dare, come on," he said. "We're going to be late for the round up."
"Mmpf. Five more minutes."
"Dare, honey, have you looked at yourself? You're going to need those five extra minutes to make yourself decent enough to be seen in public."
I grumbled, but got up. My belly felt itchy, and I stared bemusedly down at myself, scratching at the dried come I found there.
I may have taken a little longer than usual in the bathroom that morning, between needing to get cleaned up and spending awhile just staring in the mirror with what I'm sure must have been a goofily dreamy expression on my face, thinking so this is what I look like after Chris and I have slept together naked.
By the time we made it to the corral, Zach and Robert were already mounted up and waiting for us.
"Rough night?" Zach asked, smirking.
I gave him my biggest smile as I answered, "Fantastic night."
…
All through that day, I had a hard time concentrating on work. Every time I looked at Chris I could picture him naked, and it was all I could do to keep my hands off of him in front of the campers. I could barely wait until we were alone together.
That evening, when we returned to our bunkhouse after dinner, though, before I could even wrap my arms around him, Chris said, "I want to talk to you about something."
"Baby, we can talk any time. But this is the first chance I've had all day to kiss you."
I reached for him, but Chris held up a hand to stop me. "Dare, I'm serious. We need to talk."
At his tone, my mood went from playful to alarmed in a heartbeat. "That doesn't sound good."
"It's nothing bad. I just think we need to re-establish our ground rules about not sleeping together on work nights."
"How can you say it's nothing bad and then say that you don't want me to sleep in your bed anymore?!" I cried. "That's the definition of bad!"
"I didn't say I don't want you to ever sleep in my bed. Saturday nights, when we've got plenty of time, and we don't have to be up at the crack of dawn, we can still sleep together. I just don't want to have a repeat of this morning. I felt really bad about making Robert and Zach wait for us like that."
"We were ten minutes late. Big deal. They didn't mind."
"It was fifteen minutes, Darren. And that's not the point, anyway. The point is, I promised David and Ryan that we wouldn't let our relationship interfere with our work."
"I'm sure they don't even know we were late. It's not like Robert and Zach are going to run and tattle on us."
"Again, Darren, not the point. David and Ryan trust us, and we have a responsibility to them. Do you have any idea how lucky we are to have these jobs? I don't want to screw this up."
"Chris, baby, you're overreacting. Why do you have to take things so seriously all the time? The world's not going to end if you're not perfect. Just relax a little."
"Well maybe you don't take things seriously enough," Chris snapped, the sharpness in his voice slicing right through my heart.
Our eyes met, and I could see his split-second realization that he'd hurt me, followed immediately by regret. He continued much more softly, "Dare, honey, I love that you're so easy-going. It's one of the reasons I think we work so well together. But I'm not like you. If I feel like I'm being irresponsible, I'm going to feel guilty, and I hate that feeling. And if our relationship is interfering with my ability to do the best job I possibly can, then I'm afraid I'm going to end up feeling bad about myself, and feeling resentful of you. And I really don't want that to happen."
"This is because I drooled in your hair last night, isn't it?" I said ruefully.
Chris let out a snort of laughter, and the tension between us instantly evaporated.
"Are we having our first fight?" I asked.
"If I say yes, does that mean we get to kiss and make up?"
"Mmm hmm."
"Well, then, yes, I guess we are."
I took Chris's face in my hands and brought our lips together for a tender kiss. Pulling back slightly, I gazed directly into his eyes. "You know I'll always love you, right?"
"I know. And I'll always love you. Even if you do drool in my hair occasionally."
"So where does this leave us?"
"Well, for the rest of the summer, I really do think it would be best for us to only sleep together on Saturdays."
Before I could open my mouth to protest, Chris added, "But the summer's already half over. And once we're at Michigan, we'll just have to make sure not to enroll in any 6 AM classes."
"They don't offer any 6 AM classes."
"Well, then, we've got nothing to worry about, do we? Now come on, we've still got a little while before we have to leave for the campfire. Let's make the most of it."
"Now that, I won't argue with."
…
Later that night, lying alone on the top bunk, I started thinking back over my "fight" with Chris, and how we seemed to have different styles when it came to dealing with responsibilities.
Like I've said before, I've always been a pretty laid-back kind of a guy. And a lot of the things that Chris tended to worry about just didn't matter that much to me. If I showed up a few minutes late for a round up, why should I sweat it?
But when I thought about it further, I realized that there's one thing that I've always taken very seriously – and that's my relationship with Chris. So if something was a big deal to him, then I figured that made it a big deal to me, too.
Chris and I may not have always been on the same page, but we were always co-authoring the same love story. And I had some definite ideas in my mind about where I'd like the next chapter to go.
End Notes: Reviews make me smile. :)