Every time I hear our music play
Reminds me of the things that we've been through
In my mind I can't believe it's true
But in my heart the reality is you
I am all alone without you
My days are dark without a glimpse of you
But now that you came into my life
I feel complete
The flowers bloom, my morning shines
And I can see
Your love is like the sun
That lights up my whole world
I feel the warmth inside
Your love is like the river
That flows down through my veins
I feel the chill inside
-Your Love, Alamid
Raph went home, a little exhausted because of the fiasco that happened. But he is very, very happy. Donnie helped him "moved on" in a sense.
He sat on his bed and picked his acoustic guitar, a plain black painted with purple swirl design around the hollowed circle.
"I want you to keep it." Donnie shyly said as he handed his precious acoustic guitar. Raph forgot his own guitar and they had an acoustic gig that night.
"Please take care of it." He followed. The ignorant Raph just nodded and turned around.
"Raph…"
"Yeah?" He smugly asked.
"If I die, can you play our song with that guitar?"
He almost broke the guitar because of his wild nature. It was an acoustic gig again. Due to excitement, Raph swung the guitar upward but Leo stopped him as he knew it was Don's. Raph can see how shocked Don is that night. As usual, he remained quiet the whole gig.
When Donnie "died" in the first night, Raphael mourned. He stared at the guitar and remembered what Donnie said. His promise.
He picked the guitar and felt Donnie's presence on it. He remembered he is the only one Don trusted. He cleaned it and replaced the strings. He never trusted anyone on borrowing this guitar but Raph only.
Teardrops fell on the frets of the guitar as he ran his fingers on the strings.
"My Donnie wanted a song from his boyfriend?" He sniffed as he looked at the dark sky in the veranda.
"I'll play it for you every night… So listen, okay?"
Donnie crashed on his bed when his phone blared. He checked it. It seemed to be an attachment. A sound file from Raph. He opened it.
Sweet melody played on his phone. He knew this song. It's one of his favorites. He didn't expect Raph to play it for him.
He got surprised that he heard the guitarist sing. Raph sang!
But Donnie giggled and blushed. It's like Raph is serenading him. He sighed happily.
They say when you're in love, you're blind AND deaf.
As usual, our red lead guitarist woke up in the afternoon again. Today is Don's first gig of his new band. He slowly grabbed his phone and checked it.
Donnie: I really loved it! Thank you.
He smiled. He always wanted to play for him now, like what he had to two years ago. Raph felt dizzy all of a sudden. He went back to his bed and rolled a blanket over him.
"Raph? Raph?" He can hear Leo's voice from downstairs. Crap. He would be in trouble. He didn't show up in their meeting place. He felt heavy for some reason and his eyes are getting droopy.
"Raph?" Leo knocked on his door. He tried to get up but his body is like jelly.
"I'll go in, okay?" Leo said. The lead guitarist is unable to speak, felt like his throat is stuck up.
"Good afternoon… Hey, are you alright?" He asked with concern and walked until he is beside his band mate.
"I'm okay. Give me a couple of minutes." He slurred. He really felt tired for some reason.
A hand was over his forehead.
"Raph, you have a fever." Leo said. "You should rest, I'll cancel the-"
"No! Don't!" Raph wheezed. "I'll be fine. Continue the gig tonight!" He interrupted.
"You don't even have enough energy to get off the bed." The vocalist reasoned out. "You're not in the right condition to perform."
"Just don't cancel it. Don't. I'll be alright." Raph reassured. It made Leo stopped. The vocalist knew he is doing this for Donnie. It's their first gig. He knew the new band will be upset.
Leonardo sighed deeply.
"You had to fully rest until tonight. You have to tell me if you're not feeling well, okay? I'll notify Don-"
"No! Don't!" He interrupted once more. Leo just stared at him.
"Fine." Leo muttered. "I'll cook some soup. No complaints, I know how to cook it. Mikey taught me so no comments that I'll burn the house down." He dryly countered Raph as Leo left the room.
He really felt shit. Why now out of all days?! Donnie and him just got closer, there's no way he'll jeopardize this!
And shit. He forgot to reply to Donnie. He groaned and rolled with his blanket. Grasping the phone, he distanced the screen away from him as it is too bright for him suddenly.
Raph: I'm just glad you liked it. Sorry, late reply.
Donnie: It's no problem. I'm a little nervous tonight.
Raph: Don't be, you'll be fine. Anyway, I'm curious to this fandom of mine. I'm planning to surf the internet right now. Can I have your blog name?
Donnie: Oh, uh, I don't think that's a good idea.
Raph: Why not?
Donnie: Well, you don't really want to know.
It made Raph's curiosity increased. He wondered why Don doesn't want to show it and his blog as well. Only one person entered his mind.
Raph: Hey, Mike. Did you know Don's blog?
Mikey: Yup! Here it is! [link]. Don't tell him though.
Raph: Thanks.
Raph opened the laptop beside him and entered the link.
Raphaelishot
("Wow. Just wow. Heh. He thinks I'm hot.") He pressed Enter.
He stared at it, it's an ordinary blog of science stuff, random dance videos and… Wait.
It's full of Raph's pictures and those moving pictures repeatedly. He saw seemed to be an argument of him and some people.
"He isn't a bad guy! He had emotional problems he needs to get through!"
"He changed and regretted his past actions!"
Donnie is defending him.
"He is a great guy… Just misunderstood."
"I know he loves me! He will never cheat on me!"
"I trust him with my whole heart!"
This nerd is unbelievable. He had unbreakable spirit. With memory or not, he is still defending him.
He will do something about this. He felt annoyed that some people are bashing his love.
Raphie: Anyway, if you didn't want to, let's do an alternate question.
Donnie: Well, okay. I know some information about you because rock star and all. But I'm glad I can ask questions to you.
Raph: Okay then. I'll start. What degree you got in college?
Donnie: Uhm… I took up medic training, chemical engineering and now studying acoustic technology.
Damn this kid. Raph didn't get to know Donnie better because of the bet. But if he knew him better, their course will definitely change.
Donnie: My turn. Do you have any pets?
Raph: Nope. But I wanted one.
Donnie: Oohh! I have one here! I saved him when some dudes are trying to attack him.
Raph: What animal?
Donnie: A turtle.
Raph: Great, a turtle. Like me.
Donnie: Hey, he's nice! I named him Spike, after your drummer, Spike.
Raph: Well, he is my best friend. Alright then. Do you have any other talents?
Donnie: I had one besides playing bass. I dance.
Oh, yeah. He remembered. He was in this hip hop dance crew before going to be a musician. When they first met, he is completely disgusted by what he wore. He felt extremely stupid now.
Raph: That's great.
Donnie: Have you dates someone after that bassist dude?
Raph: … Nope. Don, are we dating?
He slapped himself after he hit send. That is a risky and a stupid question! This is definitely the fever talking. Fuck, he never felt this nervous.
Donnie: Well, we had our first date a few days ago, right?
He can see Donnie giggling cutely.
Donnie: I still can't believe I'm dating… You know my idol.
Raph: You don't have to think that.
Donnie: I know. Why did you date me?
By reading this, Raph, despite his sickish state, wanted to answer acceptable and serious.
Raph: Donnie, I think you are more special than you think. I mean, I felt this peace whenever I'm with you. I hope that is a good answer.
To his mind, it fucking isn't. The thing he texted is really a common sweet sappy thing to get girls!
Donnie: Thank you, Raph. I wanted to say the same to you, too.
They continued to get to know more (while eating the crab soup Leo made, which for the first time isn't taste bad). Their favorites, dislikes, opinions and habits. They spent the whole day texting.
The swing of the door interrupted Raph.
"Raph, I thought you're taking rest. We have the gig in an hour left!" Leo said, exasperated.
"I'm alright, Leo." Raph grunted as he got up. His vision got blurred once again, especially when he stood up.
He still feels weak. But he promised to make Donnie happy.
The Agent Orange band just stared at the venue. The stage is pretty big and there are a lot of people already. They proceeded to the back stage to join the main act.
"I'm a little nervous." Tim said.
"Me too," April followed.
"Guys, we practiced well. We can do this!" Mikey exclaimed, as always being the one with the positive energy.
"Looks like somebody is happy today." Tim teased while the others are giggling.
"Well because he is very happy with his vocalist." Donnie said. It made the orange vocalist blushed.
"The Mikester isn't the only turtle here who is happy. I heard that there is a certain someone that is dating the lead guitarist of Octavarium." Timothy said as Donnie looked away. Mikey laughed after.
They went backstage and saw the main event setting up. They stopped when they noticed the front act approaching them.
"Mikey!" Leo greeted, smiling at the beloved vocalist and helped him carry Mikey's bags.
"Leo! It's alright! I can carry-"
"Your arm is still healing." He said with that "authority" tone.
"You don't need to treat me like a baby, Leo." He cheekily said.
"What? You are my baby, right?" Leo smirked.
The comment made Mikey squeaked, blushing in embarrassment. "Leo!"
The blue partner just chuckled.
Raph walked towards Donnie and just grabbed his bass bag. Donnie knew this is his gesture that he'll carry the things. He can tell the two bands are sneering at what they saw. It's incredibly rare for the lead guitarist to do that. He doesn't care to others much, even before.
The Octavarium helped the new band set up.
"Say, uh… Can I help you set your lead guitar?" Casey offered to the serious April who is eyeing Raph and Don, having a casual talk.
"No, thank you." April said politely. She noticed this guy had been disturbing her ever since they met. Well, technically, they already crossed roads before. April knew he is the other suspect.
"Well, your tuning is wrong."
"Excuse me?"
"Your low E string sounds lower."
"No, it's not."
"Yes, it is."
"No, it's not!"
"Alright, guys." Leo stopped, eyeing the two combatants. "Time to finish this badgering. I'll decide if it's tuned or not."
"If I'm right, you're going to go on a date with me." Casey said with a smug face.
April just glared at the bassist. "Fine. If I'm right, leave me alone!"
"Done." Casey said.
April plucked the low E or the top string.
After Leo's silence. "April…"
The lead guitarist started to smile.
"Your tuning is wrong."
"Hey, guys! We are the band Agent Orange!" Mikey greeted with immense joy. "We hope you like the songs we're going to play! Big thanks to Octavarium for this opportunity!"
The main act is at the back of the stage. The front man of Octavarium is admiring how accommodating Mikey is to the audience.
They started to play. Their first song of the set. Casey is grinning widely when April started to strum the riff. Not long, Tim's beats came in.
Raph never left his eyes off the purple bassist. Donnie had this calm demeanor that he will never comprehend. He can see the crowd is started to appreciate the performance. This song is famous, which is basically on the grunge genre. This is a trademark song sung by one of the most respected bands.
The next song they performed is a lot of heightened lead playing from April. He got to say no wonder Casey is eyeing this lady. But to him, the bassist cutie beside her is the one he is eyeing.
Damn, is this the headache talking? It's definitely the headache talking. Yet, the raw energy of the band playing is completely like adrenaline. His band is definitely impressed to the front act they chose.
The last song is quite a surprise, due to April and Donnie switching guitars. Raph smirked seeing Donnie with a lead guitar, it totally gave a different impression. Donnie started to strum the guitar. He can really rock on.
Just, damn.
"You are not suited for lead. Heck, you are too tightly screwed up. Lead guitarists are mayhem dudes."
Ah, fuck. His headache intensifies.
"Will you teach me?" He sweetly asked.
"Fuck, no!" He scowled. Worst part is, while talking, a girl is on his lap, letting her touch his guitar.
He is amazed by Donnie that he still loved him. He hoped someday that Don will ask the same question again. He'd love to teach him. After all, it's such a turn on for his Donnie doing that windmill technique.
The audience cheered to the great show. The band started to remove their gear and went down the stage. The Agent Orange members are smiling.
"Guys! That was awesome!" Mikey squealed as they made a group hug. Leo smiled, as Mikey got himself into band business again. Also, it reminded him of the times they are still the Shell Shocker. The former drummer beamed a smile at him.
"That's great Mikey!" He said, embracing the small turtle.
"I must've played sloppy in the lead guitar." Donnie shyly said. Raph just stared in disbelief.
"What are you talking about? You're awesome!" Raph said.
"Uhm, thanks." Donnie replied.
All of a sudden, Donnie's face seemed to be distorted. He shook his head and closed his eyes, his vision is alright again.
"Raph, are you alright?" Donnie asked. Raph can see the worry on his face.
"I'm alright… I'm alright…" He said, trying to convince Donnie.
"We better go ahead." Leo commanded as they go to the stage.
"Well, not bad for a girl who doesn't even tune right." Casey mocked.
"At least, I got more girl and boy fans than you." April said, recalling that she gained fans quickly after their first gig.
The Octavarium finished setting up and the previous band watched them in the front part of the stage. The audience cheers got louder when Leo started to speak.
"Welcome to the show!" He shouted. It got insanely louder. The other band cheered as well.
"Big thanks for coming guys! Also, big thanks to the band Agent Orange! This was their first gig! Surely this will not be the last time we'll see them!"
Raph, on the other hand, started to feel that he's floating. He can feel his short breaths. He noticed Donnie is staring at him, sensing something is up.
As the song played, Raph tried to move around and concentrate on his playing. This is his shot to impress Don. Thank goodness he knew the chorus and the riff even blindfolded. When it got to his lead part, the crowd starting to scream loud especially the girls. But he only looked at one person.
The one who is staring at him too.
He's lucky that the others are covering him up. He felt his energy is draining drastically. He did simple guitar tricks and movements. His sight becomes worse each minute.
In the end, the show is successful much to Raph's relief. He really felt shitty now. The excitement of the crowd never simmered down. They went backstage. The new band congratulated Octavarium for a great show by a couple of beers.
"That's great Leo!" Mikey screamed as he hugged his boyfriend.
"Where's Don?" Raph asked, being slurred but not for being drunk. Heck, he never touched any beer.
"I thought he's with us, April." Tim said.
Raph's eyes widened when the people got a little chaotic.
"Raphie… I'm not comfortable to my room. It's very small." Donnie said with embarrassment on his face. "Can I sleep with you?"
"No, go to your own room."
Raph didn't know Don had a mild case of being claustrophobic. He realized that when April took him and slept in her house that night.
He ran then, trying to drag his feet. In the sea of people, he had a hard time finding him, even if he is only on the front area of the stage.
"DON! DON!" He screamed. He pushed the spectators away, trying to make way through. He got faster the time he saw a turtle with a leather jacket. He only stood still there. He can see the man is unable to separate himself. That's Donnie.
Big arms engulfed the scared Donnie. He blushed when he realized the one hugging him is Raph. The lead guitarist is using his last bits of his energy to get out of the screaming and the crazy people. They stopped walking when they are now in the safe zone, the back stage.
Raph still held Don protectively on his chest.
"You okay?" He asked with a hoarse voice. Raph is panting as he released Don from his grasp. The bassist just nodded as an answer but his eyes showed much worry to him instead. Raph lost his balance and luckily Don caught him, his head on his shoulder.
Damn it, he wanted to be the tough guy in front of Donnie, not being a wimp.
"Raph! Raph! Answer me!" Donnie panicked, the rest of his band members, especially Leo, noticed this. The moment Donnie touched Raph, he is burning up!
Raph barely had the strength to open his eyes any longer. He felt he is being lifted up. Before he closed his world, all he sees is his love's face.