He could hear it all the time now. The melody that made shivers run through him, the voice that prickled his senses and made his hair stand on every inch of his body. There were times when it quieted down and in those moments, Cullen was afraid. Afraid of how utterly empty he felt without it. That first night when he'd realized that it wasn't Trev singing to him, he'd been terrified. But the whispering voice calmed him, soothed his fears and it wasn't long before he felt like a lost child without it.
He knew he should tell Trev, but what would he say? He didn't want to upset her, after all they'd been through, he just wanted her to have some peace. He knew he should worry about this more than he did, so he had gone to see Dorian. He was still unconscious, but Cullen hoped to find some insight when he saw his friend anyway. The closer he got to where he was kept, the fainter the singing became, but it was still present. When he entered the room where Dorian was lying in bed, it stopped abruptly. It was unsettling. It had gone away before but it would always fade gently, not just stop like this. It seemed to want to stop him from coming to close to Dorian.
It? Maker, I'm losing my mind here, what am I on about...
He walked closer to Dorian, his steps careful without him knowing why. He stopped before him and just stared at him. He felt so helpless. He stood there for minutes before he gave up. No useful insights had come to him, no moments of clarity about either Dorian's condition or his own problems. He sighed and walked out of the room. As soon as he did, he felt a flood of relief when the whispers returned, the song filling his emptiness again. Suddenly, he didn't want Dorian to wake up. Things were fine, yes, fine as they were, nothing should change. He relaxed and let the singing soothe him.
Later that night, he was making love to Trev. No, making love was not the right choice of words. He was fucking her. It was hard, intense, passionate, crazy. He should have been tired, he'd been up working since before dawn, but the singing in his ears seemed to erase all the fatigue and urge him on. The voice was haunting and deliciously loud in his ears as he drove himself in to Trev. She moaned and met him with almost equal fervor, whispering how amazing it was to feel him again after she'd thought she'd lost him forever. His heart swelled at her words, all his emotions heightened, from the sex or the singing, he didn't know and didn't care. There was only her. Lost in the ecstasy of their coupling, he thought again that she was the one singing to him. Her voice, it's voice, it was the same. And it filled him to the brim, with everything.
The following days passed in a blur. There was so much work to be done, and Cullen did it more efficiently than ever. It hardly even felt like work to him, everything had a faint, blue touch to it that he couldn't describe, it was just there, along with the haunting whispering in his ears.
He was on his way to a meeting with Skyhold's new horsemaster when he saw Trev leaning against the stable wall.
What is she doing here in the middle of the day?
She saw him and giggled. That sound wasn't really familiar to him, much too giddy and nervous for her.
Maybe she's had an early drink?
He shook his head and snorted at the idea as quickly as it had come to him. If anyone could hold their liqour, it was Trev. Besides, why would she be drinking in the middle of the day?
He approached her. Maker, she looked delicious. He wondered for a moment why she was wearing a dress, not even the airy, short kind she preferred but some Orlesian thing, all princess-like. But the singing quickly drowned that thought and before he knew it, she was in his arms and he was kissing her like a starving man. She moaned and pressed herself against him and he cursed the layers of the obnoxious dress that was between them. He squeezed her ass and licked her neck before biting into it, eliciting a whimpering sound from her. He pressed himself against her thigh which had now come out from under her dress, his hand under her knee. She gasped as she felt his erection against her skin and he kissed her again, ravishing her mouth.
He heard another gasp and felt a sharp pain in his face and blinked several times. Trev's hand was swinging down to her side. Had she slapped him? His heart clenched as he saw tears sting her eyes and she looked at him with such anger and disappointment or... heartbreak. It was like being slapped all over again, seeing her look at him like that.
"Wha..." he began but she interrupted him.
"How could you? After everything, I thought you... How could you do this to me?"
She turned on her heel, tears flowing from her eyes now, and stalked away, leaving him dumbfounded. He heard someone cough and he whirled around. A girl was leaning against the wall, no more than eighteen or nineteen years old. Her blonde hair was tousled and her lips were swollen, as if she'd just...
She looks like she's just been kissed, hard.
She gave him a little smile. "Well, that was awkward. I would have thought it was over between you two, considering how... passionately you just claimed me. But I guess you were just out for a little fun, huh? To be honest with you, I don't really care. You're so gorgeous, Commander, I won't judge you. If you want some more, I'm happy to oblige."
She took a step closer to him while she edged a strap from her dress down over her shoulder, showing the bare skin underneath in a seductive manner.
Cullen shook his head, outraged by the realization that he'd just been standing here, kissing some other woman – all the while believing it was Trev. And now Trev thought that he was having an affair, like som dog of a man, nothing like Cullen would ever...
No, I... This is not me...
The whispering grew louder now, the volume kept on increasing and his emotions were pushed deep down until he'd forgotten what he was so upset about just moments before. The haunting tones sang in his blood, he could feel himself relax and erupt in desire at the same time. He couldn't see the girl before him very clearly, she was shrouded in a bright, blue light hovering all around her, like her surroundings was on fire, only the flames were blue. He could only hear a contented sigh and a moan as he claimed her mouth with his own, again and again, no straight thought forming in his mind. There was only the singing, ever haunting, ever controlling.