Moving Forward
It wasn't long after making a commitment to be there as much as he could for Ben and Lisa that Dean realized he needed to be willing not to go out on every hunt. Realizing this truth, he silently struggled with what that decision would mean for Sam. The times when he was looking after Ben and Lisa when they were asleep, he recalled many times what Bobby had said regarding Sam not remembering his life without his soul. So far Sam was still unaware of anything that had gone on before Death put his soul back in place. Dean figured part of it had to do with his brother helping in Sioux Falls, getting the house Lisa had recently purchased ready for a move in.
The one positive was Lisa. Dean still wasn't used to having her supporting him the way she did. The first time she suggested to him that he couldn't take on being a hunter full time, while still be a part of her and Ben's life, he became instantly angry, for some reason. Not able to handle what she had been trying to say, Dean took a long walk around the hospital. On his walk he called Bobby, asking him what he thought. Bobby wasn't afraid of telling Dean his thoughts. "The one thing I never quite got, is why you and Sam have to be the ones saving the world all the damn time. There are other hunters out there. Now most of em don't like working together, but maybe it's time to try things differently. Sam's doing fine so far, so no worry-en there. When you get here, we can figure things out. You just take care of what yah got there. We'll call you if anything big happens."
Bobby's words helped Dean focus on what he could control. When he returned Ben's hospital room, Lisa was awake at their son's bedside. She didn't try and move away, when he sat in the chair next to hers. After his apology, they talked about his concerns, and the things she suggested, Dean was willing to take into consideration.
"Your move dad." Getting the title of dad still felt strange. Dean was getting used to it, but at times, he still felt like there was another person being referred to instead of him.
Looking at the checker board he realized that his kid had managed to get two more of his chips, leaving only two of his kings left. One move would get one of his king's taken away. The other move wasn't much better. After Dean made what he thought was the better play with his checker king, Ben moved one of his, blocking Dean from a better play. In the next two moves, Ben was the winner once again. "You really are bad at these kinds of games."
"You don't think I was going easy on you?"
Ben looked at him with one of his brows raised. "Uncle Sam says you don't have the patience for this kind of stuff, so no, I don't."
It hadn't taken long for Ben to adjust to Sam. The first time they met was in the new rental house back in Indiana. Ben had been a bit overwhelmed by how tall his new uncle was. Now whenever there was a chance, Ben wanted to call Sam to talk about Chess, along with telling his uncle about his video game collection.
"You got me pegged pal, but give me time. I'll figure this out, and then you better look out."
Ben shook his head. "That will be the day."
Since the game was put away, Dean took the opportunity to tickle torture his kid. He was careful not to get around his ribs, but under his chin, and arms, as well as his feet were prime targets. Ben tried to hold in his laughter, though by the time Dean got to his feet, he failed. Dean stopped before Ben got out of breath. "Alright smarty pants, there's more where that came from," Dean mockingly warned. He glanced at the door as it opened. When Lisa stepped in, he walked over, greeting her with a hug and kiss.
As she pulled away, she was smiling. "It sounds like you two were having fun."
"Mom, he lost again, and tickle tortured me . He just can't face the fact that I trump him in all games."
"Watch it kiddo," Dean teased.
After getting another kiss, Dean watched her walk over to Ben's bed putting a red case down on his lap. "Alright, I think all of your DS games are in here now." While Ben began to fill Lisa in on what she missed while she was gone, Dean walked to the back of the room, taking a seat on the sofa as he got his phone. Since there were no messages on voice mail, Dean leaned his head back against the cushion, letting his eyes fall shut. The year he spent with Lisa, there were plenty of times Dean and Ben were outdoors tossing a football or baseball, or going camping. There was rarely a time when they were stuck inside that they played board games. Ben had always spent that time in his room on the computer, or playing his games.
Hearing Lisa's soft footfall Dean opened his eyes, holding his arms out as she sat down on his lap. "It's nice to come back to a smiling Ben."
"Agreed. How was the meeting with the Humphry's attorney?"
"Longer than I would have liked. They want a lighter sentence for Ryan, but the judge isn't willing to do that." Lisa sighed. "I'm just ready for this to be behind us."
Before responding, Dean moved her dark hair to the left of her neck. He kissed the exposed right side, moving up to nibble on her lobe. Feeling her body press into him, Dean wanted to do more than just to kiss her. "I am too. One more day until that's behind us."
She nodded as he wrapped his arms around her. "Did you and Sam get a chance to talk about Samuel?"
"He agrees that things could go south pretty quickly. Samuel has his own agenda, one that we don't want to deal with."
Lisa told him that she finally found a moving company reasonably priced for transporting their things to Sioux Falls. It was hard to believe that in four days, they would be out of the hospital and on the way there. It was also a relief.
Just after breakfast the morning of Ben's discharge, Sam arrived to help get all the things that had accumulated over the past few weeks down to the car. As excited as Ben was about leaving, he was still a little sore. His joints were still stiff from the length of time he had spent in bed, and even with the exercises the physical therapist had him doing, things like being able to dress on his own didn't come easy.
In the bathroom, Dean finished taming his hair, noting that Ben would need a haircut soon.
"Dad, did you ever have an injury where someone had to help you with dressing and stuff?"
"Arms up." When Ben complied, Dean gently pulled the long sleeved red shirt down over his son's outstretched arms and over his head. "I think some when I was a little older than you, but not recently."
"Does it make me a baby for needing help?"
Carefully Dean turned Ben around to face him. "No Ben. You've been incredibly brave about all of this. When you're hurt, sometimes it's good to have help. It doesn't make you a baby."
He nodded, letting Dean pull him into a gentle hug. "I'm glad you're my dad."
"I'm glad you're my kid." After another moment, Dean let go, helping Ben with his shoes before they went out into the room. "Is Sam loading things in the car?"
Lisa nodded as she gave Ben a hug. "He's got your car packed to the brim. He also gave me these." What she held up were two amulets on a leather necklace. The amulets would protect them from Demon possession. When Ben asked about it, Dean told him a little of the truth, that it was to protect him along with Lisa from some Supernatural beings.
Before Ben could inquire more, Sam came back. "Well, that's everything except what you guys are taking in Lisa's car."
"Thanks Sammy. Listen, if you want to go on and take off you can. We still have to sign him out."
"Where do you want to stop for the night, or do you just want to go straight through?"
"We're going to try to make it straight through."
Ben moved past him heading for Sam. "Can I ride with you?"
"I'd like that, but you would be a lot more comfortable in your mom's car. I bet once we get there, we can take a spin."
Ben was slowly getting used to the idea that for a while there would still be limits on the things he would be able to do without getting too sore.
Dean grinned when Sam reminded Ben of the Chess App that was now on his son's phone. "You can use the time to gain some skills."
"I guess so." Ben replied sullenly
Lisa went over to him, reminding Ben that he was getting better every day. As she tended to him, Dean took one last chance to make sure they had everything. Once they were all ready, they took their leave of the room, heading to the nurses station to be sure they had everything signed before leaving for their new home and new life.
With only a few stops along the way, Dean pulled into Bobby's Salvage Yard right at midnight. As he shut off the engine Lisa woke up, stretching her arms over her head. "Are we here?"
"We are." When she leaned toward him, Dean accepted the kiss she offered, noticing the front door to the house opening. When the kiss came to an end Dean glanced behind him, not surprised that Ben was still asleep. For most of the trip he'd wanted to know what their new home was like. Dean got Ben's door open without waking him, something he had perfected back when he lived with them in Indiana.
Inside, Bobby was waiting to shut the door behind them, grinning. "I tried doing that with both you boys, never worked. Yah always woke up before I could even get yah into the house."
"He was awake until about an hour ago, and he still has some healing to do," Dean whispered before heading upstairs to see where everyone was going to sleep. Sam met him at the top of the stairs. "You guys have the old master bedroom. Bobby set up a cot for Ben."
"Thanks Sammy."
When he laid his son down, Ben shifted around for a few seconds while, Lisa was taking his socks off. Once he was tucked in, he went right back to sleep.
"I hope he'll get a full night's sleep," Lisa murmured, walking over to Dean.
"I'm sure he will, now that he won't have his sleep interrupted. I thought maybe we could go raid the fridge."
Dean stayed where he was as Lisa walked to him. When her arms slipped around his neck, Dean knew that she had a hunger of another sort, one that they hadn't had time to take care of. She pressed her lips hard against his. When her teeth came into play, Dean slid his hands lower, just as she broke the kiss.
When he lifted her, Lisa wrapped her legs around his waist, holding her secure while turned the overhead off. Once the lamp by the bed was off, Dean made quick work of removing the clothes that were in his way for both of them.
As he trailed kisses down her neck, he leaned down depositing the woman he loved on the bed, mindful of Ben sleeping just across the room. The only reason he continued was that it was too dark for Ben to see, and based on the way that Lisa was grasping at him, trying to pull him closer, Dean deduced that she wasn't worried either.
"Mom? Dad?" Ben's frightened voice woke both of them. Knowing the room better than Lisa, Dean hurried over to the side of the cot, kneeling down. "Shh, we're at Bobby's."
"It's too dark in here."
The light from the bedside lamp gave the room enough of a glow to see by, but not harsh light. "How's that?"
"Better. This bed is hurting my ribs."
He and Lisa hadn't realized that it was too firm. Once he was standing, Dean helped his son off of the cot, leading him over to the king bed. After Ben snuggled in the middle, Dean slid in bed next to him. "We'll figure something out for tomorrow night. Do you want the light on?"
Their kid mumbled something, already falling back to sleep. Glancing over Ben's shoulder, Dean found Lisa smiling at him. "Maybe we need a king for the new house."
"And how many times do you think he'll be willing to crawl in bed with us. Besides, there's too much room," Dean whispered.
"Tryen sleep," Ben mumbled. Once the light was off, Dean rested on his back trying to remember a time when he felt so at peace. Even the year living with Lisa, there hadn't been true peace. As much as he loved her, and Ben, having lost Sam made finding that an impossibility. Hopefully the movers would be around with the furniture around lunch, and maybe they could stay in their new home. There was still work to be done with a panic room and protective symbols, but for the most part, the house needed very little repair.
Glancing at the clock, Dean sighed, deciding to go on and get up since it was almost six O'clock in the morning. After pulling on more than just his boxers, Dean yawned while quietly opening the door, getting it shut just as quiet. As he made his way down the hall, the smell of Bobby's strong brewed coffee had Dean walking a little faster.
Bobby and Sam were at the table, both nursing their cups of coffee. After getting his own cup, Dean joined them.
"How did you guys sleep last night?" Bobby asked.
"Better than we have. Ben woke up about twenty minutes ago. He said the cot was too hard on his sides."
"I'll get some padding for it," Bobby assured.
They sat quietly all drinking up their coffee. "So, any news on what's going on?" Dean noticed Sam look away. "Spill it."
"Samuel called. He wanted to know if I would help him on a hunt. Look, before you get all overly protective, I already told him that we've got other things that need taking care of."
It was a relief that Sam hadn't taken up with their maternal grandfather. Dean didn't trust him, nor for that matter did Bobby. "So, did he say what they're going after?"
This time Bobby answered, putting down a map of the US. There were circles going down I-80. He explained about each circle being massive infestations of ghouls, wraiths and other creatures of the like. "All of them leading to here," Bobby said pointed to the larger circle covering most of the area in and around Sandusky OH.
"What is that?" Dean asked.
"A man murdered his whole family, with a hammer, after getting home from working at a cannery."
"Dean whistled softly. "Any more details?"
"I think it's the mother of All, Eve," Bobby answered.
"You think Samuel can handle it without making this a bigger deal than it is already?" Dean asked, suddenly wishing he was upstairs in bed with Ben and Lisa. He had his doubts.
"Rufus called telling us he's already run into him and that family of his. Look, I was thinking maybe they could use my help up there. It will also give us eyes on what's going on."
"Maybe I should go." Sam was glancing over the map.
There was no way Dean was letting Sam anywhere near Samuel, not after what had gone on the last time. "Sam, Bobby can handle things on his own." Maybe he was being overprotective. Be that as it may, Dean wasn't going to risk the wall in Sam's mind coming down. Samuel could definitely screw that all up.
His little brother shrugged before getting up with his cup, heading for the sink.
Not long after finishing lunch Dean drove his family, Sam included, over to the new house, which was about a twenty minute drive from Bobby's place. It was on the outskirts of town and sat on ten acres of land.
Ben, who had been quiet up until that point, was clawing at the door before Dean put the Impala in park. Without putting his coat on against the cooler weather, Ben bound out of the car, taking off towards the back of the house. He didn't make it too far before he stopped grasping at his sides.
Dean took off, getting to Ben, as the kid gasped for breath. Cas had a few more visits before Ben would be completely healed, though seeing his kid in so much pain, Dean almost prayed to him.
With Ben now resting against his chest, Dean got him to calm down enough to take in slow breaths.
"It's hurting," Ben gasped.
Sam and Lisa arrived with a water bottle and prescription strength Ibuprofen. Once Ben had taken that, they headed for the house. There was a sofa in the front room where Dean put his son.
"I hate this. Felt fine, and now it's all back to hurting." Ben sniffed, rubbing the tears from his face.
Lisa sat at his side. "It won't be long before you can run and not worry about any of this."
Sam had disappeared, but when he returned carrying Ben's chess set, Ben smiled. Dean helped him sit up.
As they two of them began setting up for a game, Lisa took Dean's hand, leading him upstairs. At the top of the stair case, they began to look around, having only seen some pictures Sam had sent them. In total, there were three rooms upstairs, one being a master suite, their room. It was on the opposite end of where the stairs began. The room was several more feet in diameter than the room at the old house had been.
Dean let Lisa lead him around, happy to listen to her talk excitedly about things like the huge walk in closet they now had. In the closet, Dean noticed a smaller door. It opened to a small attic space, a perfect spot for putting his lockbox with the weapons that he didn't keep in the trunk of the Impala.
The bathroom had an antique style tub with clawed feet that was much larger than any modern tub. While Lisa looked around at the other things in the bathroom, Dean reached out, running his hand alongside the porcelain tub. He could easily imagine nights when they could spend time in there."
"What is going through your mind?" Lisa said catching him unaware, something that didn't happen very much.
"Hmm, just liking what I see." When he looked at her, she had her hands on her hips.
As he grasped her body, pulling her into her arms, she gasped, putting her arms around his shoulders and neck just as he tilted her backward while nuzzling her collar bone. "I thought about what it will be like once we can put the tub too good use," Dean whispered before he nibbled her collar, bringing her up from the tilt.
Lisa had her eyes shut, trying not to make too much noise while he kissed his way up her neck until his lips were on hers.
"That's so gross," Ben groaned.
As Dean broke the kiss, he saw the back of Ben's head as the kid hurried out.
"Looks like he's feeling better," Lisa said.
"Or worse now that he caught us kissing."
Lisa leaned in pressing her lips to his. "Could have been worse."
"Mmm, we need a lock for the door in here." It was tempting to see how comfortable the floor was, but Sam called up to them, letting them know that the moving trucks were pulling in the driveway.
With all the moving going on inside, Ben slipped his coat on, letting his uncle know he was going to look around. Sam told him to stay within sight of the house, but once Ben started exploring, trying to keep the house in sight, especially when he saw a wooded area further in back of the house, wasn't easy. At the edge of the woods Ben could still see the upper level of the house. In front of him was a path. When he got to it, he turned seeing the roof of the house. Making sure he had his cell in his pocket, Ben decided that if they were worried, they could just call him.
Taking it slow because of his sides, Ben followed the path as it led to the right of a bunch of trees. The wind blowing through the trees made a cool sort of sound. Up ahead he found a good sized stick, big enough that he could use it as a walking stick. It would be cool if he could smooth it all out somehow. Distracted by his thoughts, Ben didn't notice how far he was going. Back in Indiana they had woods too, but the trees didn't make the same sound with the wind blowing through it. Looking up, Ben couldn't even see the sky. The path wound further away from the house without him noticing.
Being here reminded Ben of his favorite show, The Zombie Invasion. He knew his mom didn't want him watching the show, but he was the master of sneaking around, though only if Dean wasn't there. Somehow his dad knew when he was up to something. With his dad in mind Ben pulled out his phone finding that he didn't have a signal. He glanced around, realizing that the path wasn't as easy to follow. Using his stick, Ben swung at some of the weeds, gasping as his right side began to hurt. He walked the way he thought he had come from, but ended up in a lot more weeds and thicker tree coverage. Turning again, Ben went back another way walking for what felt like forever before hearing a stream up ahead.
When he got to it, he took his phone out, but it still didn't have a signal. "These pay by month things suck," Ben mumbled as he began to follow the stream.
It began to widen the longer he walked. It was also getting colder. There was a feeling of desperation where he just wanted to sit down and cry. Didn't his dad tell him there was no shame in that? As he sat down on a rock, Ben tossed his walking stick into the stream watching as it flowed away. He hoped that his uncle and parents were looking for him. Looking down at his feet Ben found some rocks, and began picking up the bigger ones, tossing them into the water.
When he threw the last stone, Ben heard his name being called. It sounded pretty far away.
"I'm here." He yelled as loud as he could. "HEY," He yelled even louder.
Again he heard his name being called but it was still far off. "MOM, DAD."
"Ben, keep talking." That was his uncle
"THERE'S A STREAM."
He felt a lump in his throat because it was getting darker, and he was getting colder. He kept calling out until he began to cough.
"Ben?"
"Uncle Sam, I'm down here, the streams wider." When he heard branches snapping from where he had walked from, Ben got up and headed that way. He wrapped his arms around his sides feeling his legs getting all wobbly.
Up ahead he saw light, from a flashlight. "I'm right here."
When he saw the tall form coming at him, Ben felt his eyes watering. A second later he was being hugged by his uncle. "I…I just…I…" Ben didn't care when the crying started. All he wanted to do was to go home, even if he did get in trouble.
Sam had put a warm blanket around him, and as they walked, Ben felt his hands tingle a little. He drifted to sleep until hearing his uncle yelling something, and a distant response.
Someone else taking him roused Ben once again, but not enough to completely wake up. His father's whispered voice was assurance enough that he had been found. Fleetingly, Ben wondered if he was going to get his butt smacked, but the exhaustion he felt didn't have him worrying too much.
"Hey pal, arms up." His dad whispered, and Ben complied keeping his eyes shut. Another hand was on his back holding him in a sitting position as Ben felt his pajama top going over his head, then his arms. After he had his bottoms on, Ben felt someone helping him lay down. He hugged his pillow before sleep found him, along with the safety of being in his own home.
When he opened his eyes, Ben smiled as he saw his ceiling covered in glow in the dark stars. Some of them were just randomly placed, where others were put in the forms of some of his favorite constellations. Rolling over, Ben saw that it was a little past midnight. He vaguely remembered being put to bed, along with the whispered voices of his parents and even his uncle, though what they said, he had no idea. His stomach grumbled. As he rolled to his left, his side began to throb. For a few minutes, Ben tried finding a comfortable way to sleep, but when his right side began hurting also, he knew that he needed his Ibuprofen.
The room sort of spun when he sat up, making his stomach feel like it was going to come up his throat. When he stood up, his legs felt a little like jelly and they hurt too. Ben sat back down. "MOM?"
When the room spun again, Ben leaned back against his pillows shutting his eyes. "MOM?"
Hearing the knob to his door turning was a relief to him. Hearing her voice was even better. "I feel sick, and everything hurts now."
The bed shifted before he felt her hand against his head.
"You're warm. Dean, his thermometer should be in that bag you brought up right before we went out to find him."
Ben remained as still as he could, opening his mouth when his mom told him too. When it beeped, he tried rolling over, but it made his left side hurt worse. "It's hurting," Ben whispered feeling tears in his eyes again.
A hand slid in behind his head, and Ben was able to sit up enough to take his medicine, including the liquid stuff, which made him gag. That was followed by a few sips of Ginger ale before his head was back on his pillow.
"Mom?"
"I'm right here honey."
"I need another sip," Ben whispered. She helped him sit up holding the glass as Ben took a few draws from his straw. After another few sips, his stomach began to settle. When he rolled to his left, the pain was nearly gone. Ben heard his mom whispering something, and his dad, but sleep was pulling him under fast.
A warmth filled his body, and some of the pain he felt earlier was starting to go away. When the warmth went away, Ben turned on his back, drifting deeper into sleep. The next thing he felt was a kiss on his forehead. His eyes opened to his dad looking down at him.
"Hey."
There was sunlight coming through the window. "What time is it?"
"A little after one."
Even though it was hard to believe, Ben still felt tired. "Am I in trouble?"
"We'll talk about that once you're doing better." That was a yes. "Do you feel like eating some soup, or Jell-O?"
Ben nodded, not feeling embarrassed when his dad kissed him again before helping him sit up propped against some pillows. As he looked over at the small table beside his bed, Ben noticed his phone wasn't there. "Dad, did I drop my phone?"
"No, it's put away for the time being."
Alone, Ben tried to remember how long he'd been gone from the house. It was still sunny when he started that trip. There was a knock at the door before it opened. "Hey Uncle Sammy."
"Hey squirt."
He sat down on the other side of the bed after propping up some pillows behind him. Ben glanced down at his uncle's feet. They were huge, just like the rest of him. "Am I in a lot of trouble? Dad said we would talk after I feel better."
"It took as two and a half hours to find you," Sam answered. He didn't look mad, just sad in a way.
"I wasn't going to go far. You can see the house from the path, just a little of it."
His uncle took hold of his right hand. "I think you know what keeping the house in sight means. The rest is for your dad and mom to discuss with you. I did get you something to do while you're spending time in here."
Sam reached beside him and picked up a book. It was Algebra.
"Homework?"
"Yeah, you're mom got you registered today, and you have a few things to catch up on."
"When do I have to go?"
"Monday." Sam went over some of what his new school was teaching before his mom came in with a tray and his uncle left. She put it over his lap and kissed him as she sat on the edge of the bed while he took a bite of the soup.
"Wow, this isn't like the stuff you buy mom."
"Bobby brought some over this morning." She felt his head as Ben took another bite. It was chicken noodle, the best he'd ever tasted. Ben ate all of the soup, two of the crackers and drank most of the ginger ale before needing to go take care of things.
"When you're done Ben, you come straight back here."
Once she was heading downstairs, Ben walked down the hall finding his bathroom. It was a lot bigger than the one he had at the other house. There were two sinks, and a lot of counter space. The toilet was against the far wall across from the bathtub. Ben noticed that it wasn't as hard getting his pants down on his own. After business was dealt with, he went back to his room finding his dad sitting in his desk chair.
Suddenly the carpeting on his floor looked way more interesting than anything else. Without being told, Ben walked towards his dad, stopping when he saw his father's work boots. A finger under his chin pulled his gaze upward until his eyes found those of his Dad's. Ben felt a lump in his throat and wanted to look down.
"Ben, when Sam told you to keep the house in sight, what did that mean to you?" His voice was lower. When his dad was mad, he didn't yell. He just lowered his voice, and that was worse in Ben's eyes.
"Um, not to go so far away that I couldn't see it, but at the path you can still see it."
"Is that what your uncle meant?"
A part of him wanted to argue that as long as he could see it, even if it was just part of the roof, it was good enough. Ben knew from the way his dad was sitting stiffly in the chair that he wasn't going to take anything from him.
"He meant for me to be able to see the whole house, not just part of it. Dad, I wasn't doing it to be mean or to get anyone mad at me. I thought if I had my phone that if something happened that I could call you. It felt good to be out there. I mean, I've been in the hospital so much, and in the car and at Bobby's. I just wanted to look around is all."
"If you would have waited for us, you're mom and I were going to go have a look around too. You also know that if you have ideas like that, to come talk to us."
More than anything, Ben just wanted to go back to yesterday and not take off as he had. "I'm just stupid I guess. All I wanted was to just take a walk. Then I couldn't figure out how to get home and it got dark and I was cold." Ben looked down again feeling like crap. "I don't want you to be mad at me and you are mad at me."
In a second his dad was holding him. "You are not stupid, far from it. One of the reasons we wanted you to stay close is due to the fact that you didn't know your way around yet. The amount of time you've had to stay inside would make me stir crazy. Ben, you know right from wrong, and you know the consequences when you don't listen."
Ben hugged his dad as tight as he could not wanting what was coming next.
Lying with his face buried against his pillow, Ben tried to stop crying. His butt was hurting worse than his sides. His dad said he wasn't stupid, but what smart kid would go hiking in place he had never been. All of it was such a big joke. Ben was relieved that his dad wasn't going to leave them for good. He knew that sometimes he would have to go help his uncle and other hunters, but Ben was aware that this time it wasn't going to be forever. The big joke was all of the changes going on. He had wanted to tell his dad that, but at the time, Ben couldn't figure out how.
The whole spanking thing had never happened until Dean came to live with them. Granted, Ben only got them when he did stuff, like disobeying a rule, or sassing his mom, but when he did get one, the hurt was more than just the swats he got on his butt. He knew how much his dad loved him. The times he'd gotten spanked, and after they talked, dad would leave him to think about why he had been punished. Those times Ben hadn't felt so bad. Now it felt like his life was inside out.
He heard his door being opened, but stayed the way he was, still feeling the stupid lump in his throat. Ben felt someone lay down on the free side of his bed, before fingers moved through his hair. "Ben?"
Mom wasn't the one he needed. "I…is dad sta…still here?"
"He went over to Bobby's. Are you hungry?"
Not wanting to talk to his mom, Ben just shook his head. "Wa…will you…ta…ta…tell him." Ben took in a shaky breath. "I need him."
She rubbed his back. "I'll let him know."
When the door shut, Ben didn't try and hold off the crying. This time he didn't think the spanking he got was the right thing. He just needed to try and get his father to see that.
The call from Rufus telling Bobby that Samuel and the rest of the Campbells were gone, along with the news that they were facing a much bigger problem, warranted a discussion on if Dean and Sam needed to go to Ohio. Before Ben's accident, Dean wouldn't have thought twice about going. They wouldn't be discussing and would be on their way.
"Eventually Eve will need to be stopped," Bobby was saying as he looked directly at Dean. "Having said that, you look like you have other things going on in that head of yours."
Sam glanced up from his computer.
"It hasn't been a whole day since we got to the new house. Ben's still not feeling a hundred percent. I'm just trying to figure out the things I need to help take care of, and what things someone else can deal with."
"You talking about going part time?" Bobby asked.
Dean got up heading for the fridge. Once he had his beer, he took a long draw. "I can't hunt full time." Dean looked at his younger brother. "I don't want you hunting on your own. Look, Sammy, I know you're capable. You're a damn good hunter, but there are things you need to know." When his phone buzzed, Dean bit back the urge to swear. It was Lisa's cell. Walking to the office/front room, he answered. "Hey Lis, can I…"
"Ben's still really upset. He wouldn't talk to me, and told me he needed you."
"I won't be long." After putting his phone in his back pocket, Dean went back to the kitchen. "Sam, you mind riding with me?"
His brother nodded, gathering up his laptop before following Dean outside.
"You drive." Sam barely managed to catch the keys as Dean slid into the passenger seat. Bobby was right, Dean had always done his best to protect Sam even if it meant withholding information. Once they were on their way, Dean looked at him. "Sammy, you weren't in Hell for a year and half."
Sam glanced at him. "What? I only remember waking up downstairs at Bobby's, before that I was falling into the Pit with Adam beside me."
"You were pulled out two days after you went in. When I told you I spent a year with Lisa and Ben that was the truth. The reason I wasn't with them, was because you came back for me after that year". Dean told Sam the parts of that year that he felt were most important, finishing with the deal he made with Death to gain Sam's soul back.
The rest of the drive was made in silence. Sam drove like he was on autopilot, and Dean didn't try and get him to talk. As they continued down the road, Dean remembered Ben saying that he was stupid, something Dean made sure his son knew wasn't the truth.
"Why didn't you say anything, just tell the truth?"
Dean took a look at his brother, seeing only pain etched on Sammy's face. "Because we had you back. Without your Soul, everything you did was done without thought or care on what happened or who you hurt. When you came upstairs, not remembering that part of your life, it was a relief for me. It's not about me though. It's really hard for me to see you capable of so much more than what I give you credit for.
They came to a stop at the house. Dean was surprised when his brother followed him inside.
When Lisa saw them, she kept her eyes on Sam for a moment before turning them in Dean's direction. "He's still in bed. Does Sam need anything?"
Dean was glad when Lisa wrapped her arms around him. "Just time." After giving her a kiss, he took the stairs two at a time.
Dean eased the door to his son's room open, finding Ben with his face buried in his pillow, his body shaking as he cried. All in all Dean was doing a shitty job at being a good dad and a good big brother. He kicked off his boots, as he walked around to the free side of the double bed. Once he was leaning back against the pillow, Dean reached over and gently pulled Ben against him. "Shhh, I've got you kiddo."
As he comforted Ben, Dean rubbed his back in a circular motion. He kept doing that until Ben finally caught his breath. "What do you need me to hear hmm?" When he left, Dean had a feeling Ben wanted to say more. At this rate, his kid was going to be in therapy well into adulthood.
"Can you give me a different punishment than spanking me?" Ben's voice was barely above a whisper, and there was fear behind the words.
When Dean was a kid, and got spanked, it made him more angry than sad at his actions. He would think about how to try and do better for his dad. Sammy had dealt with getting spanked by crying as Ben did. It had always taken Sam longer to calm down after being spanked. Maybe fear kept Sam from telling Dean and their dad what Ben was willing to share now.
"Does it hurt your feelings?"
Ben gave a nod.
Dean kissed the top of his head. "Ben, when you do something dangerous, like going off to a place none of us knows, or when you lie about something that we really should know about, or disrespect another adult, even after you've been told not to do those things, do you think getting grounded will remind you when those situations rise again, not to do them.
Ben clutched at the sides of his shirt, sniffing. "Not ra…really."
"If you know every time you do any one of those things, that you'll be over my lap like you were today, how likely would you be to repeat something like that?"
Again he sniffed. "N…not lot."
"When I spank you, and you aren't ready for me to leave you alone, will you let me know next time?"
He nodded. "It ju…just makes it hurt inside, so much."
Dean drew his kid closer. "I know kiddo, I hated when your grandpa gave me one. Sammy hated them even more. Sam learned really quick not to do the things that would get him spanked, because he felt the same way you do."
"I forget sometimes, and don't mean too."
"Did you forget yesterday?"
Ben didn't say anything for a few minutes. "I knew. I was just bored."
"Ask one of us to help you find a way not to be bored. I know moving around all the furniture was a lot of chaos. Not all of us needed to help out yesterday. Ben, I know you feel like you don't need us to have fun, or to figure things out. At the same time, you should know that none of us, not Sam, your mom, me or uncle Bobby would ever think less of you for asking if we can help you, whether it's something fun, or something that you're having a hard time figuring out on your own. None of us will tell your friends either."
Ben giggled a little, which was better than having him so upset.
"You think mom's mad that I didn't want to talk to her about this?"
"I can guarantee she's not mad. She knows that you need time with me. It's been really hard on you since I left. I'm guilty for thinking that you like your mom would be able to move on. My mistake was not really asking you how you felt, not listening when I should have. There was a lot of that when I was growing up."
Ben lifted his head, looking at him. "Because you were the kid and your dad was the adult? Some of my friends' dads are that way. Does this mean I get a say in things?"
Dean grinned at him. "Sometimes you will. Even if we tell you that you don't get a say, I need you to talk to me or your mom if you feel bad."
Ben sighed, before resting his cheek back on Dean's chest. "When you go hunting will I be able to talk to you?"
"Sometimes. Other times, I might be out of range. Those times, you need to talk to mom, and let her help you work things out."
"Yeah, trying to do the harder stuff alone really stinks."
There was a knock at the door, before Sam walked in. "I called Bobby to come get me."
What Dean wanted was to talk to Sam, but Ben still had a vise grip on the shirt he was wearing. "Sam, if you don't want to talk to me talk to Bobby. He wanted you to know right up front."
"Yeah, I will." Sam smiled at him, before heading out the door.
"Alright kiddo, let's go downstairs and see if there's anything that sounds good to you."
"I thought I had to stay here."
Dean hugged him. "I think being alone up here isn't helping you. You're still grounded, but we'll make it less isolating for you."
When he sat up Ben let go, staying on the bed. Once Dean was standing, he turned back towards him. "Are you too old for a ride on my shoulders?"
Ben's face lit up, and Dean grinned at him. "Alright pal, let's go get something to eat." Once Ben was secure, Dean headed to the kitchen, making sure Ben didn't get his head bumped on the way there.
AN: Alright, here you go. So this story takes place or in place of the events of Mannequin 3. I know Rufus died in the show, but I liked him too much to have him go. I'm using the outline of the show for this story. Some of it might be different, like Dean trying to figure out how much he needs to hunt.
Ben is eleven in this story. I'm basing some of his reactions to things on what my eleven year old nephew would do. Ben is still his dad in every way, but he's been through a lot so some of his reactions to things are different. The Zombie thing is this worlds version of Walking Dead, I just thought a name change would be good.
Alright, thank you all for keeping up with me. Thanks for the favorites adds and alert adds, and thank you for the reviews, please keep them coming.