Secrets Revealed
AN: Well, here is a new chapter to my story. Tensions are rising and secrets are soon going to be revealed. I do hope that you like it.
Toph woke up feeling tired; drained of all her energy. She'd tried to drift to sleep while being held in Zuko's arms, but his scent reminded her of their son. His warmth constantly evoked a feeling of helplessness within her. She tried several times to sleep, but Katara and Haru's hushed conversation also kept her up. She was glad when they left the abandoned house and disappeared into the cold night. Aang soon followed, and that's all she knew.
"Where's Zuko?" Suki yawned from the other side of the room.
"They left early," Katara answered. She was folding her cot and organizing her belongings into her bag.
"Where did they go?" Suki asked, her eyes falling on a quiet Toph. Katara and her exchanged glances. They wondered why Toph was up so early. She was usually the last one to wake up.
"They went to buy ostrich-horses," Sokka explained as he entered the living room. He held a few dead badger-rabbits in his hands that he'd hunted earlier that morning. "Well," he said proudly, raising his hand so the girls could see his catch. "I brought food."
"Yuck," the Kyoshi warrior said, scrunching her nose, "they're bleeding into the floor."
She rushed to the water tribe warrior and placed a dirty rag on the floor to clean the blood that was pooling on the floor.
"Sorry," Sokka shrugged with a sheepish smile.
"It's okay. Why don't we get breakfast ready and Katara can help Toph pack?"
"Great idea, Suki," he said, following after his girlfriend.
Katara watched as the two exited their room and she concentrated her attention to Toph. "You didn't sleep well, did you?"
Toph shook her head and got on her feet. She began to messily fold her blankets and cot. Katara helped her. In silence, the girls finished organizing and packing their things. Katara watched Toph carefully. Her heart broke at seeing the earthbender move, as if she was in a catatonic stage.
"We are going to find him," Katara reassured her friend.
Toph offered her a weak smile and nodded. "I know,"
An hour later, Haru, Aang and Zuko returned with five ostrich-horses. After breakfast, they divided their loads onto the animals and headed on their way.
Rae was still not with her. It had been only a few days, or maybe a week. Toph wasn't sure, she couldn't remember; better yet, she didn't want to remember. Not having her son beside her felt like decades. The pain wasn't numbing down; it tenfold with every second and multiplied with every sunrise and every sunset.
She was restless. Imagining a life without Rae was inconceivable. Death was the only outlet to mitigate the pain. She tried hard to push the bitter thoughts to the back of her mind – she had other things to think about - but it seemed useless. Every time she closed her eyes, she heard Rae's voice calling out to her from the darkness. In the meantime, all she could do was pray and plead to any of the heavenly entities to keep her son safe.
"We should stop, Zuko," Sokka complained, as he steered his ostrich-horse next to the one that carried Zuko and Toph. They'd been on the road most of the day, the animals, and the group were getting restless.
"We will, Sokka, but not now. We can still cover more ground." Zuko sighed.
"When will we stop, then?" Sokka said brooding. "I'm tired and hungry. The rain is seeping through my poncho."
"Soon, Sokka," the Fire Lord said curtly, "we are getting closer to our destination."
"Where are we going? We've been travelling for too long." Aang asked from ahead of the ostrich-horse caravan. "We've been riding aimlessly, Zuko! Every lead those soldiers we encountered along the way have led us to a dead-end. I-"
"Aang, for the love of mother Terra, can you..." Haru interrupted and then trailed off irritated, "we know where we are heading," Haru said tiredly, pinching the bridge of his nose tightly. "Just follow us and don't ask so many questions, guys." He rolled his eyes, as he guided the animal into a gallop.
"Who made you boss?" Aang muttered, as he followed after Haru's ostrich-horse.
Every one was tired and exhausted. Toph was drained, too. She'd barely slept in the last couple of days. You could see it on her face. The dark bags and circles under her eyes grew darker daily. She didn't mind it. After she recovers her son, she would have plenty of time to sleep.
"I'm tired. I just want to stop and rest for a bit. If we continue at this rate, we are going to be too exhausted to fight anyone."
"Just keep on moving," Suki said. "We'll find shelter soon."
Sokka narrowed his eyes and exhaled loudly. "Fine," the young warrior pouted, before turning to Zuko. "I'm leaving now. I hope you don't lead us to our death." He grumbled.
Zuko didn't speak; he watched as Sokka hurried next to Haru and didn't bother to look back at him.
"I'm sorry about my brother," Katara apologized, as she steered her animal beside Zuko and Toph's ostrich-horse. "He can be irritating when he's hungry."
"We are all hungry and tired," Zuko said in a detached voice.
Katara's blue eyes opened widely. "Yes, that's true. I just wanted to apologize... for... um..."
"It's all right," Toph said, smiling wearily.
It was true. Toph was famished, but for now, she would manage on little food and sleep. She needed to be strong for Zuko and for Rae's sake.
"How much longer until we reach our destination, Zuko?"
"A few more miles down the dirt road," he said, looking up at the sky. "We should be there by nightfall."
"Oh," she said in a low voice, her light eyes focused on Toph. "Are you okay, Toph? You've barely spoken and you didn't eat lunch today. I'm worried about you. Do you want a bite of my pear-melon? It should keep you satiated until we make dinner."
"She's right. You haven't eaten at all today. You should eat," Zuko looked over his shoulder, but Toph looked away, making it impossible for him to see the sorrowful expression on her face.
She didn't want Zuko or anyone to worry about her. "No, I'm fine. I can wait until dinner time."
She could sense Zuko's uneasiness. "I need you to be strong, Toph."
"I am strong,"
"Please, eat something... anything. I'm worried about you... I'm already..."
She knew that he felt responsible for their son's disappearance and was trying hard to care for her and their group. She'd tried to calm him, but it seemed futile. The least she could do was act strong and let him believe that she could handle any situation.
"I'm fine," she muttered.
"Are you sure?" Zuko said, his voice filled with concern. "We are almost there... A few more miles, Toph. We can rest then. I'll make sure that you eat and rest."
"I'll be fine, Zuko. Don't worry so much. You already have enough on your plate," she said, trying hard to sound upbeat.
Zuko and Katara exchange worried glances. Zuko shifted uncomfortably on the saddle. Toph could sense the rapid change of his heart beats.
"Toph, Zuko," Katara spoke softly, "I have a feeling that we are getting close to finding your son. I'm going to get ahead the caravan. I'll talk to you guys later," Katara finished and moved passed them. "Bye!"
"Bye," Zuko and Toph said simultaneously.
Something about Katara's words stirred within the Fire Lord's heart. It hammered faster, as new hope settle in. Her positive tone made Zuko thankful to have such great friends. He knew that he was riding their hides raw. They'd been travelling since early morning and only stopped for a quick lunch and then they were back on their way. Zuko was grateful for them, but he just wanted to find his son.
Katara's words were like soothing salve to his wounded heart. He wanted to believe her. He - needed - desperately needed to believe her. Any sign of hope that his son was alive was always welcomed.
"Thank you, Katara," Toph whispered as she listened to the distant footsteps of her friend's ostrich-horse.
"Her words gave me hope," Zuko said. "I know that we'll find our child!"
"I desperately want to believe her."
"Me too," he said absentmindedly, and continued looking forward.
"Zuko," Toph exhaled very slowly. She'd barely spoken to him in the last two days. He wasn't any better. He'd practically barricaded himself from her and rarely spoke to her.
"Yes, Toph?" he asked. She didn't reply t first at first. "Toph, are you tired?"
She nodded. "A little bit."
She was so tired. Toph's body ached, but she was determined to endure it if it brought her closer to finding her son.
"Are you hungry?" Zuko asked again without glancing back.
"Ahem," she cleared her throat. "No, I'm fine. You?"
"I'm fine, too." he lied.
He wasn't fine. He was bushed. Hunger, exhaustion, and guilt burdened him. Zuko's feeling were brewing inside him; festering within him over the last few days. He couldn't help blaming himself for the many mistakes he'd made. Mistakes he made in the past, for all the lives he'd damaged and for the loss of so many members of his family. He felt responsible for many things, but the one that hurt the most was failing his promise to keep his son safe.
"Are you really all right, Zuko?" Toph asked. "And I don't mean if you are physically all right? I'm asking how you are feeling."
If only he could express to her the guilt that was weighing him down. He gulped loudly. His chest burned and ached because of his past errors.
"I-I," he stuttered. I blame myself for my mother's disappearance. I'm responsible for Mai's death and for Rae's disappearance, he thought bitterly.
"What is it?" Toph's voice brought him back from his reverie.
"Huh, nothing,"
Toph could tell that he was lying. There were certain ways to know. She opened her mouth to reprimand him, but she was too tired to confront him. They continued riding.
"Let's camp for the night." She said.
"But we are so closed to..."
"Probably, Zuko," she interjected. "What good are we to Rae if we are tired, hungry, and grouchy?" she sighed.
He nodded and quickly ordered Haru to stop and set camp for the night.