Thanks so much for the comments and the conjectures! Boy, you all have no faith! Really, you are no better than Darcy!

I am not completely finished with Chapter 9, but some of you made me worry with your comments that you felt it was too angsty. Not my intention :) Part 2 is from his POV and I am struggling with it. I hope to post that over the weekend - MAYBE :)

The Doll Chapter 9 Part 1 Day 31-33

"Lizzy, Lizzy, Lizzy!" Elizabeth felt her doldrums lift at the sound of her dear friend's voice. "And, just where have you been hiding the last few weeks?"

"You wouldn't believe it, if I told you." She held out the brown paper bag she carried as a peace offering. "I know I should've called before just showing up like this, but I do come bearing gifts. Of the liquor variety."

"You've got my interest." Charlotte peered inside the bag. The lime, triple sec and tequila were dead giveaways. "It must be bad if you're wearing a sombrero before we even get drunk. Let me get the salt. You get to work on the ice."

Elizabeth opened the freezer and pulled out the ice trays. She settled at the kitchen table feeling comforted immediately while Charlotte started the blender. It had been a very good day when in kindergarten she had chosen the desk next to the shy be-speckled girl. At the time, it had been all about geography. Charlotte had been sitting in the much coveted seat next to the room's little playhouse. From that first meeting, over twenty years ago, nothing separated the best friends.

Elizabeth's phone rang again. She checked the caller ID. Him, again. She rolled her eyes. Fifteen messages. Thirty missed calls. When she played back the messages, she was sure one would tell her precisely where she could pick up her belongings. Disgusted, she turned her phone off. It made her feel better. If only he had tried this hard BEFORE she discovered his little blonde haired secret. Hell, one tenth of this effort would have made her deliriously happy just a few hours ago.

At Charlotte's interested look, she told her, "William Darcy can go straight to hell and play hopscotch with the Devil as far as I'm concerned!"

"Hopscotch with the Devil?" Charlotte said salting the rims of their martini glasses. "Poor William Darcy. What has he gone and done now? Called you tolerable again?"

Sticking out her tongue, Elizabeth reconsidered getting drunk. As bad as she felt, she did not want to be hung over. The adoption shower was tomorrow night and she was determined to make it special for her friends. Darcy would probably not let her have her party at his penthouse and she should be giving more thought to where she would move the party than consuming alcoholic beverages! What a disaster! He'd probably have her belongings packed up and ready to move when she finally went home. Well, he could just go sit on an egg right now!

"Will Darcy? Hm." Her friend turned her attention to filling their glasses. "I seem to recall I heard a rumor somewhere about him. Oh, yes. That's right. From my own mother, who heard it from your mother. Fanny seems to think that you're seeing that luscious man!" Talk about understatements. And, her mother never 'under' stated anything. She sighed loudly. Charlotte gave her an appraising look as she sat a margarita in front of Elizabeth. "I know that can't be true, because my bestie would never keep something like that to herself."

She sipped her drink. "Darcy and I have been seeing quite a bit of each other lately."

"And, please tell me that by 'seeing quite a bit of each other' you mean you are shagging that fine man until he can't walk straight."

Elizabeth knew that Charlotte expected an emphatic denial. Because she could not deny the best and worst weeks of her life, she finished her drink in one chug, put her head on the counter holding her glass up high. Screw saying sober! "I need more alcohol."

"Oh, no! No more margaritas until you give me details, young lady. I can't believe you haven't told me about this!" Her friend took her glass and went to the blender. "Spill! I can live vicariously through you so don't scrimp on my account. I'm serious, Lizzy! I want details. How was it?"

"It was actually indescribable." She felt the blush clear to her toes.

Elizabeth knew Charlotte would be naturally curious. They always discussed their relationships with one another. The good, bad and ugly. This was the only time in twenty years she'd kept a secret from her friend. "When did you start seeing him?"

"He came by my place after the reception." Elizabeth felt almost shy talking about Darcy.

"Oh my God! Lizzy that was weeks ago. Oh, you suck for keeping this from me." Charlotte emptied the contents of the blender. "I've been telling you for months he had to be interested in you. Why else would he stare at you so? Then, the wedding. The rest of us might as well not have even been there."

Elizabeth took her refilled glass, determined to drink this one slower than her first. "You don't know what you are talking about."

"Don't I? You can see for yourself. Jeremy gave me the files to edit. Darcy's in quite a bit of the video." That didn't surprise Elizabeth. Charlotte's brother was a wiz with all things photographic. He also had a weakness for tall, dark and delectable men.

Really, who didn't?

While Charlotte retrieved her I-Pad, Elizabeth could not deny she was curious. Fast forwarding through a lot of the pre-wedding items for both the groom and the bride, Charlotte stopped on the wedding processional. Coming down the aisle with Darcy, she looked as if she had bitten into a lemon. She remembered then. He had told her she was 'lovely' when he had met her at the back of the church. It struck her now that he had more than likely meant it. She had, of course at the time, thought he was being sarcastic. Every step to the front of the church she had turned the word 'lovely' over in her mind trying to figure out his secret insult. There'd been no secret insult. He meant what he said.

The nuptials were every bit as beautiful as she remembered. Jane and Charles had opted to write their own vows. Jane's were sweet causing her to smile. There was a moment of panic when Charles could not find his notes. Darcy averted disaster by pulling a spare copy from his suit pocket. Elizabeth couldn't help thinking that if it were Darcy's wedding day he would have memorized such an important speech. She shook her head. It was counterproductive to think of his superiority to other men when she was trying to hold onto her anger.

As Charles said something to make those congregated laugh, she realized Darcy was not attending the groom at all. He was staring. At her. In the serious way he had. Video Elizabeth caught him at it and rolled her eyes.

"Turn it off, Char." She didn't want to watch any more.

"No, wait. You have to see your dance with him." Charlotte queued the video to their dance. While she was busy people watching over his shoulder, he wore a look of pure contentment. The dance ended. She made to move away, he stopped her. He'd told her the dance with her was the highlight of his evening and how had she repaid him? She told him off. As she left him alone on the dance floor, Darcy stood watching her go with a pained look on his face.

"He looks like a kid who is watching his favorite balloon float away." Charlotte whispered, caught up in the drama unfolding as if were a Lifetime movie instead of real life. Darcy did.

Elizabeth whispered, "I told him that we didn't need to continue with the Monday night dinners since the wedding was over."

"So, basically, you'd never see him again?" Elizabeth went to deny it, but realized actually that was exactly what she had said. Charlotte laughed. "I guess that explains this." She fast forwarded to the garter toss. Video Elizabeth was in the foreground looking bored, awaiting the outcome. From her vantage she had been unable to see it, but Darcy did grapple with Vince. Even though her mother told her he had, she still couldn't believe it. Vince's brother, Vance, had to help his twin win the battle with the more aggressive Darcy. The camera panned back to her as her mother drug her to the middle of the dance floor, Leggs played loudly in the ballroom. She curled a finger of invitation to Vince. Jeremy swept the room for their reaction, landing on Darcy who was watching the whole scene unfold. He looked like he had at his Uncle's benefit, like he wanted to break something. Charlotte whispered, "No wonder he went to your place. He couldn't bear the thought of losing you."

Elizabeth began to weep. Charlotte abandoned her I-Pad and moved to her side concerned. "Oh, Lizzy, it can't be so bad can it? What happened tonight?"

Skirting details about the contract and Xy, she told her friend what happened at Darcy Electronics. Concluding with, "They dated each other for two years. She works with him. He sees her every day. He never thought I should know that? That, it wasn't a big deal to tell me? I looked like a complete fool."

"Maybe it isn't a big deal to him that he works with her." Charlotte suggested. At Elizabeth's snort, her friend continued, "Really, Lizzy. I mean he is such a serious man that I can't imagine him not being honest with you." Her friend took her hand in hers. "Is your problem you think he's still seeing her behind your back or that you were embarrassed to be seen in that sombrero?"

Elizabeth laughed through her tears. "I don't know."

The contract worked both ways. They both could do whatever they wanted along as they didn't have sex with someone else. He'd probably not think anything about fooling around with another woman. Kiss another woman! Why would he? It wasn't a violation. He wouldn't know how it would hurt her. It shouldn't hurt her. If she had remained unattached without any romantic notions toward him, it wouldn't have.

The thought of him and Madame Curie being close together all day, probably sharing the same microscopes, talking about erotic things like processors and circuitry and sharing long looks over motherboards made her want to vomit. How could she compete with someone who could solve electrical anomalies? It was so unfair. She was already in competition for his attention with Xy. At least with his doll, she felt she had an upper hand because she had a pulse. How could she complete with someone like Dr. Palmer?

Could the relationship with Cheryl really be platonic? Had she gone psycho for no real reason other than her own insecurity? Darcy had tried to stop her from leaving. Heck, he'd even offered to leave his precious team and to take her home so they could discuss it. He'd said they could sort it out. Maybe they could still?

"I don't know, Char! Something is bothering him. He has been acting odd. Even odder than usual. He hasn't been much company at breakfast and we haven't been spending a lot of time together. I mean he's barely touched me all week. And, he's been coming home later and later every night."

"Home?" Charlotte took their empty glasses and refilled them. "Are you living with him too?"

"I - I - " Elizabeth blushed under her friend's scrutiny, then shrugged. "It just sort of happened. I wanted to be with him as much as possible." It struck her. She had really wanted that. She still did want that. As mad as he had made her, as cruelly as she had taken him to task tonight, the truth was that she had not stopped wanting to be with him. It was her insecurity, her fear that she wasn't enough that had made her so upset. The week of his strange avoidance and then finding Dr. Palmer at Darcy Electronics had allowed her overactive imagination to simply filled in the blanks. She hadn't even listened when he tried to explain. She'd reacted very much the same insufferable way he had when he found her with Vince at his Uncle's benefit.

"Why can't I be smart, Char? Why didn't I pay more attention in science class? She has like eight bazillion PhDs. What do I have that he might want over that?"

Charlotte wrapped a comforting arm around her. "I don't know, Lizzy. But the way he was looking at you at the wedding and the way he has looked at you every single time I have been in that man's presence, you have something he wants pretty bad. And, I think, dear friend, you need what he has too. You've been kinda flighty the last year or so. He's the type of man who will ground you." Charlotte pulled away, with real concern on her face. "Oh my God, I just thought of something."

"What?" Elizabeth started, looking up from her drink.

"The world has truly come to an end." Charlotte said with mock seriousness. "Both your mother and I agree about something!"

Elizabeth laughed. Grateful that Charlotte was always, and would always, be there for her.

*(*

Waking with a wicked hangover, Elizabeth childishly waited until she knew Darcy would have already left for work before she went to his place. If he didn't want her to use his penthouse for the adoption party, her mom had grudgingly informed her that she could use theirs. But she'd be seriously displeased if it came to that. It would be a nightmare to move venues, even more so because she would have to face her mother's inquisition about why she couldn't have it at the penthouse. But, she would do what she had to so that the party went on without a hitch.

And, after the party?

He wouldn't want her there anymore. She'd be reasonable, mature as she packed up her belongings. She actually felt embarrassed for putting on such a display where he worked. Her only consolation was that no one witnessed her little performance in the parking garage and that she had held it together until she made it there.

Elizabeth was surprised that her card still worked in the elevator. Opening the door to the penthouse, she reminded herself that she just had to get through with the party. If she could do that, she could just hide out in her apartment for a few weeks until she recovered enough to find humor in this latest debacle. She wondered how many women had ever met their rival in a sombrero? She'd probably looked like a kid playing dress up for Halloween! Not a sophisticated equal for a man like Darcy. She rubbed her temples. Humiliation with a hangover required too much effort.

Sighing, she glanced at her watch grateful she had a distraction. She had to decorate, warm up the appetizers and put the finishing touches on the adoption cake she had chilling in the refrigerator. She took off her sunglasses, ignored the throb in her cranium and made her way to the kitchen. She'd texted Darcy after she parked in the garage and asked if it was alright to still have the party there. If he didn't text her back in the next hour, she'd just assume she should move the party. She laid her sombrero on the island.

She should gather the stuff in anticipation of his anger. After all, why should he text her back when she'd ignored his calls all night long? She still hadn't listened to his messages not wanting to hear his vitriol or his wild assumptions of where she had gone. Of course, he would assume she went running into another man's arms. He probably thought she was wanting in fidelity every bit as much as she was lacking in intellect and self-control.

Then, she noticed the carriers that she had used to transport her Mexican dinner were on the counter. Freshly washed. His breakfast dishes were rinsed and sitting in the strainer waiting to be put away. Everything was orderly, clean. Exactly how she liked to keep her kitchen. Another reminder he could look after himself just fine without her. She was unnecessary. She stood in the middle of the kitchen at a loss of what to do, struggling to find a place to begin.

"So, you finally came home." For a moment, she thought she had conjured up his voice. She turned, not expecting to actually see him. He was in the same suit from the previous night. It was severely wrinkled. Working on DARPA must have gone late. She hoped she had not been such a big distraction. His tired eyes and unshaven cheeks added to his wild air. "Where did you go last night, Elizabeth? And, don't try telling me you went to your place. I know you didn't go there. And, I know you didn't go to your parents."

Had he gone looking for her? Had he truly worried? This surprised her.

"I went to a friend's." She was curious how he would do without all the facts. With omissions.

His mouth formed an angry twist. "And, did you have fun with your friend?"

"Yes, I did. Thanks for asking." She was not going to be more graphic. He deserved no particulars. She was irritated at the superior tone in his voice. She'd done nothing wrong. He needed a reminder. "How about you? Did you and Cheryl enjoy the dinner I made you?"

"Enough!" He roared, slamming both hands down on the island between them. The vibration was such that he knocked over her sombrero. He stepped forward and actual fear pumped blood through her veins. The mask he wore every day was completely gone. He looked thunderous. His eyes the color of pitch. He stopped suddenly, his breathing uneven. "You don't know what things I've been imagining all night. How worried, I've been! That you were somewhere dead in a ditch? That you went to him! Were you too busy with your friend to simply answer your phone! Have you no compassion?"

"Too busy? You mean did I sleep with my friend?"

His breath caught. "Did you, Elizabeth? Tell me honestly."

Did he really have such little faith in her?

"I did sleep with my friend." A stupefied look claimed his face. She remembered the wedding video. A man and his balloon. He deserved to be taken to task for the week he'd put her through and for making his assumptions about Vince, but she could not be this cruel to him. She turned from him, absently put up his dishes. "I had no choice. Charlotte doesn't have a guest bedroom at her apartment. Her couch is way too lumpy for a comfortable night sleep."

It took a moment, but she heard him whisper, "You went to Charlotte's?"

"Yes, where did you think I went?" Elizabeth turned back to face him, well aware of the answer.

Bloodshot eyes searched hers. "You know what I thought."

"For your information, I've never been the one to cheat." She felt sad he didn't have any faith in her. It hurt. "I wouldn't start with a man I'm contractually obligated to."

"I should have known you would honor your commitments."

His words stung, but she worked through it. "I'm surprised to see you here this morning." She picked up her sombrero. "I thought you would have gone in to work by now. Isn't the final DARPA submission due today?"

"It is. In a few hours." She was the recipient of a long examination. Finally, he shut his eyes. "And, you probably want to get ready for your party tonight. I guess I'll shower and get out of your way." He stopped in the doorway, running a finger along the molding but not looking at her. "You'll have the party here as planned tonight? You'll be here when I get home."

Nodding, she poured a cup of coffee. She did not round up his belongings for him. She did not pack his lunch or prepare his thermos for him. He was a grown up and could look after himself just fine. When she heard him leave, she took her cell out of her purse, turned it back on. Sixty missed calls. Thirty-seven messages. They had stopped only fifteen minutes before she walked through the door after she sent the text asking him about the party. Without listening to his messages, she deleted each and every one. It would do her no good to hear his allegations about where she had spent the night, such ugly things would only reignite her anger.

*(*

The great room was decorated with boughs of blue flowers and balloons. There were going to be twenty or so guests so she had thought this would be the best room for the gathering with its panoramic view of the city. Everything looked ready. The cake was decorated. A giant stork carrying a bundle of blue blankets. The appetizer trays were strategically organized. The couple and their guests should be arriving soon. She backed up eyeing the room, checking the composition. Did it look alright? She hoped it did not come off as cheesy. It was such a serious occasion. A family becoming one. She did not want to disappoint Paul or Steve on such an important day.

"It looks very festive, Elizabeth." Her heart hammered at the sound of his voice. She had hoped he would come, but she was still surprised by his presence. She imagined he would have something way more important to do that did not involve her or her silly party. That he would have gotten into something in the lab and forgotten.

In his hand was a bundle of daisies and wild flowers. He'd never bought her flowers before. "I know they aren't your favorite. Forgive me, but I couldn't bring myself to buy you the same thing another man had already given you." He looked at the gathered blooms. "When I saw them, they reminded me of you."

She took them without comment, inhaling the scent of the unique mixture. She knew he picked them out for her. This was not an arrangement made by a florist for someone anonymous. It touched her. Though, she wasn't done clinging to her anger.

"You look very pretty." She was dressed in a plain, rose colored sheath dress and cork heels. Nothing special. Her hair in a messy ponytail. "Is there anything you would like help with?"

"No. I've got it all under control."

"Of course you do." Darcy said softly. He sighed, then consulted his watch, "Why don't I shower and change then? Our guests should be arriving soon, right?"

Elizabeth nodded. He had anticipated them by just a half an hour. She imagined that the night would be uncomfortable with matters unresolved between her and Darcy, but she found his presence next to her reassured instead of distracted. Instead of choosing a crisp suit that would have stuck out at such a gathering, he'd changed into jeans and a wine colored dress shirt that complimented her dress. She'd never seen him in such casual wear. Or, in such warm colors. As their guests arrived, it became clear that it was not just his attire that he changed. Tonight, he made every effort. He spoke to every one of the guests as he lingered by her side the entire evening. Ready to give her any assistance she needed. Her Silent Knight.

The food was well received. Her cake she'd spent so much time on was admired. It brought her joy to nourish others, to be part of their celebrations. It was an honor. The star of the show, Aiden Michael, a healthy six-month old baby with cherub cheeks was an absolute delight. She'd spent a half an hour in awe of the child holding him close to her bosom as the baby's new fathers ate themselves. Counting toes. Inhaling sweet baby breath. Blowing raspberries into his bare belly earning a giggle. Baby giggles. Was there ever a happier sound? It was impossible not to feel hopeful when holding a new life in your arms.

Presents were opened. The new parents received quite a few nice things. Even though Elizabeth catered the event, she felt as she watched from the sidelines that she should have gotten something for the couple. The oversight made her feel uncomfortable. She could have bought a few outfits or a blanket. Something. Instead, she felt awkward as the present table emptied. Names were recorded for thank you cards later.

The last item on the gift table was a card. A card she was surprised to learn was from her and Will. It contained a sizeable check because as the card indicated, there would be things they needed that they did not get today. Things the baby would need as he matured. Naturally, the men seemed to think it was her doing. She accepted their gratitude when it became apparent that Darcy would be more comfortable with her having the credit.

Finally, the evening ended. She drug out the cleaning of the dishes, the breakdown of the party. She willed Darcy to go to his lab but she knew it was a vain wish. She knew instinctively she was on borrowed time. He wanted to talk. Such a frightening concept. A man of few words wishing to speak. Suddenly, she was so very exhausted. She didn't want to post mortem the events of last night. She'd give anything to strike such a horrible day from the calendar, to make it disappear. It had been such a waste of one of their precious days.

Oh, how she wished she could turn back time. To Saturday morning when she had woken to find his letter. Or, Sunday when she had woken in his arms. Or, Monday even when they had last laid in his bed laughing together. Or, perhaps, she could turn back time back all the way to the wedding. Yes, back to their dance. Instead of implying she never wanted to see him again, she would have invited him out for coffee. What a moron that Elizabeth had been! How different things would be now if she had only opened her eyes then before it had been too late. Wiping at the tears on her cheek, she really wished she could turn back time. Just this once. She'd give anything for the power. Just this one time.

"You've been in here a while, do you need help with anything?"

Caught crying, she turned quickly away. "No. I don't need anything."

Darcy crossed the kitchen, stopped behind her. She could feel him behind her. Quietly unyielding. Knowing his persistence, she turned to face him. His face remained passive, but she saw the muscle of his jaw work. Slowly, as if he was unsure of his reception, he raised his hand to her cheek. With his thumb, he brushed at one tear only for another to take its place. She wished she was one of those pretty criers. Like Jane. But, she went all Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Splotchy skin and red rimmed eyes. Just one more thing she was not good at.

Gently, Darcy folded her against his chest. She felt him inhale then exhale as he tightened his hold on her. She could hear his heartbeat. It was a loud, strong drumbeat. Firm. Reliable.

"I can't stand seeing you cry, Elizabeth. You were made for laughter, light."

He kissed her temple as he had so many times since she'd moved in with him. He bent down, arm under her knees, swung her up easily. Carrying her past her bedroom, he took her to his.

Darcy deposited her gently on his bed, knelt in front of her and slowly removed her shoes. She was numb. Fatigued. He stood her up, parted her from her dress, unhooked her bra. He carefully pulled her ponytail loose. She did not stop him but she had never in her life felt less like having sex. He kissed her lips lightly. He said her name. Wiped her tears with both hands. Then, he did the most remarkable thing. He fished out a well worn MIT t-shirt from a drawer she had never seen him wear, and pulled it down over her. It smelled of him, fell long around her thighs. He turned down the sheets of his bed, stripped himself down to his boxers. He got in, settled against his pillows and held out a hand to her.

Confused, she looked down at him.

"Come to bed with me, Elizabeth." He patted the spot next to him, before looking at her in such a vulnerable way. "Please."

She took the spot next to him. Immediately, he wrapped a strong arm around her middle as his other hand sought hers and weaved their fingers together. Her back against his chest. Spooning.

Once settled, he kissed her neck, right below her ear. The spot he had marked her the night they had made love for the first time.

"Tonight, I want nothing more than to hold you close, to feel you next to me. We both need rest. Tomorrow. Tomorrow will be soon enough for our talk."

She tried to fight it. She tried to relish the feeling of his arms wrapped around her, but she was too wiped out. Sleep came over her like a warm blanket.