Chapter 36: Chapter 36
Crossroads
AN: Got my laptop back and I am so ready to continue this story. Sorry for keeping you waiting.
Heartbreak
After a long and tedious day, Toph found Zuko's company inviting. Sitting next to the warmth of a crackling fire was the best feeling on a cold winter night, Toph thought contently. She sat up, leaned forward and gently kissed the scarred eye of the Fire Lord. It didn't take the Blind Bandit too long to hear Zuko's pulse accelerate. She often had that effect on him – and oh how she liked it!
"What was that for?" he chuckled like a shy teenager.
Toph shrugged; a secretive smile displayed on her lips. "I don't know. I just felt like it. My way of saying thank you," she whispered, and nuzzled his neck lovingly.
"If that's how you say 'thank you'…" he trailed off, capturing her lips with his, and kissed her firmly, "…you can thank me anytime, sweetheart," She heard Zuko replied with a low mumble, as his lips lingered on hers.
With a light laughter, Toph gave his lips one last kiss before returning to her spot, next to him. She rested her opened palms on the cool grass, as she let the seismic waves from objects around her paint a peaceful picture of the night. Everything was quiet and serene; everyone in the mansion had gone to sleep hours ago, all except, a few guards that walked around the perimeter, doing their nightly rounds – but they were far away from them. She caught Rae's heartbeats, and the anxiousness she felt whenever he was more than a few yards away from her, ceased. The child was asleep, and next to him was a great warrior that she trusted with her life – the Dragon of the West, the old General Iroh.
"Talk to me, Toph," Zuko said, in his usual raspy voice. "Why are you so quiet? What's going through that pretty head of yours? What are you keeping from me?"
"Me? Keeping something from you? I am an open book." She shrugged carelessly. "You should be the one doing the talking. You've barely said a word about what happened last week," she said to Zuko.
"I already told you," he said, pausing for a brief moment, "I am fine with everything."
"I know you aren't worried now that you know that Ozai actually being your biological father," she began, but Zuko interjected. "You don't have to worry anymore if you actually have the right to the crown, because you do. So, what's bothering you?"
"You don't miss a beat, do you? I was just thinking that how different it would've been if Lu Ten had been my father…?" he sighed.
"It sure would have been different,"
"Yes, it would have been better if he'd been the one that raised me, instead of Ozai. Lu Ten, he was a great man with morals that rival Ozai…"
"In a way, I'm selfish because," she paused, "life would've been very sad for me."
"Why do you say that?"
"Imagine if your Lu Ten had raised you…" she trailed off, "you and I… Rae… We would've never met, right?'
"I don't know," he said, shifting uncomfortably.
"But that aside," she began, as she listened to Zuko's heart beats slowing down. "Why did Haru leave us again?"
"Ah?"
"Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. I know that you are keeping something from me." She said coolly.
"What?"
"I know that you got a message hawk three mornings ago…" she trailed off, when she sensed Zuko shift uncomfortably on the blanket, and his heartbeats began to accelerate.
"I-I, um, you weren't supposed to know," he gulped.
"I wasn't supposed to know, but I do, Zuko." She said nonchalantly. "Rae was playing on the gardens. I used the seismic vibrations… I had to make sure that my son was safe."
"I understand,"
"When I was doing that, I saw a clear picture of you, holding one of those birds… Haru left as soon as you got the message that the hawk brought. What did it say? What's happening, Zuko? Is it that you don't trust me anymore?"
"Are you still cold?" Zuko asked uneasily, quickly changing the topic. "You feel like you need a bit of warmth," he sighed, taking off his robes and draped it over Toph's slender shoulders. He kept his distance, afraid of how the earthbender would react to his abrupt change of topic.
"I'm not cold, but thank you," she said, frowning at Zuko. "But don't try to change the subject, Fire Lord," she said sharply. "Everyone knows that you are troubled by something. But, you know what irritates me the most," she said, inhaling deeply. The ground began to shake softly, causing the Fire Lord to reach for her shoulders. "You're hiding something from me. Don't make me force you to tell me," she snapped.
He gulped remorsefully, quickly releasing her, when she became tensed. "And... thank you." She said, pointing at the robe over her shoulders and then crossed her arms over her chest. The heat from the fire and Zuko's robe over her shoulders felt great, but she wasn't going to let him know.
"You're welcome," he replied in a low voice, scooting next to her. "Are you warm enough? If not, I can make the flame grow hotter."
"I'm fine. Thank you," she said with a headshake, and got on her back over the picnic blanket Zuko had brought with them. "So," she paused, "aren't you going to start talking about what's going on? Why are you being so secretive?"
"I don't… Toph," he shrugged. "Would you believe me if I said that I am doing this to protect you? To protect your heart, sweetie."
"Protect me? I can protect myself," she scoffed.
"I know you can," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose, "I know you can, Toph. But I can also protect you. I have to protect you… and our son."
"From what?" she asked, throwing her hands in the air in frustration.
"I can't," he said exasperated. "Can we talk about something else? I don't want to tell you why I sent Haru away… In fact, it's official Fire Nation business, Toph." He said, raising his voice.
"Liar," she said, reaching out to place her palm over his heart. "This has nothing to do with the Fire Nation," she deduced.
"Please," he begged in a fretful voice, "don't make me tell you, Toph. It'll kill you, princess. It'll devastate you."
"I'm stronger than that," she said irritated. "I can take anything. Just… just spit it out! Does this have something to do with Rae's kidnapping?"
"Can we talk about it another time? I just want to spend some time with you…" Zuko said aggravated.
"Why not tell me now?" she asked.
"Because," he said, his nostrils flaring with frustration. "Let's just… for today, please, humor me. Please, Toph. I will tell you everything, but not now. Not until I know everything has been taken cared off, princess. Please, let's just enjoy this night."
"No,"
"Toph," he pleaded quietly. "We leave in two days. I just want one night with you. Can you please…?"
"Just tell me,"
"Let it go for tonight. I just want to spend some quality time with you, before I get back to being the Fire Lord of the Fire Nation. Before I return to the daily planning, and grueling meetings with advisors and diplomats. Please, please." He begged tiredly.
She sighed heavily. "Fine… " she said angrily. "Fine. Hide things from me… I thought you loved me!" she hissed at him, hoping that her tantrum would cause him to tell her his secret.
"You're joking, right?" he asked. "You really think that I don't love you, Toph?" he asked desperately.
She nodded. "Yes," she said, testing the Fire Lord's patience.
"You think that I don't love you? I love you so much. I'm keeping this poisonous secret inside," he said through gritted teeth, "because I don't ever want you to know or experience another ounce of pain. Because I rather carry the hurt and the pain it'll cause you once you know. I rather that my heart break and not yours." He said vexed.
"You're being so selfish," she yelled.
The bonfire increased in size and heat as the Fire Lord stood up and looked down at her. "I can't believe you would say that," he said hurt.
"I'm sorry," she said regretfully." I didn't mean it like that…" she said apologetically.
"Enough," Zuko said, doing an about face and began pacing. "I'm going back inside,"
"Wait," she said, causing the young firebender to halt on his tracks. "Where did Haru go?" she asked curiously.
"Gaoling," he said rudely, and looked over his shoulder.
"Why?"
"Do you really want to know? You won't like the truth,"
The scent of burning wood, and ashes, filled with the saltiness of tears filled the air. Her heart broke, when she heard Zuko hide a sob with a dry cough. She gingerly removed the robe he'd placed over her shoulders to keep her warm, and tossed it next to her. She brought her knees to her chest, and wrapped her arms around them. She swallowed hard and braced herself.
"Gaoling, eh?"
"Y-yes," he stuttered.
"Why there?" she asked defeated.
"To apprehend your parents for the kidnapping of the Crown Prince of the Fire Nation." Zuko said in a diplomatic voice, and left her sitting in front of the dying fire