Su woke face down in a pillow, something warm and wet lapping at her hand as she cracked an eyelid and regretted it instantly. She felt like she had been hit upside the head with a brick. A particularly vengeful brick. One with tiny brick hands and feet, and tiny brick steel-toed boots. A hiccup roiled her stomach, and the sour tang in the back of her throat revised her stance. That horrible brick seemed to have a nice lemon twist to it. The lapping continued, a soft whine accompanying it as a wet nose made its way into her face, Laika's tongue following to lick the remaining taco sauce off of her cheek.

"Ugh, piss off mutt." Su pushed the dog away, rolling onto her back and right off the bed as her stomach revolted, emptying its contents onto the floor of what appeared to be, upon closer inspection, her bunk. She managed to scramble to the head before the second bout caught her, leaving her retching until she thought there was nothing left, her head falling to rest on the blessedly cool metal of the toilet bowl. She had either had a very good birthday, or a truly horrible one. The jury was still out.

With the ease of long practice, her throbbing brain traced through as much time as it could. She remembered Kowloon. So far so shiny. Remembered her first drink and the plate of egg rolls that accompanied it. Still on the up and up. She remembered Mari and some guy. Houston? Austin? It didn't matter, since the Cap had stolen him out from under her. Definitely not shiny. But then someone had bought her a drink. Better. And another. Still rising. And after that it all became a blur of lemon twists, manic grins, and possibly inappropriate touching?

Su leaned out the door to the washroom, looking over her bed, still made, albeit a bit rumpled from her sleeping on it. Clearly no inappropriate touching had happened. She found a queasy sulk coming on when she heard a whistle trill down the corridor of the ship, followed by a laugh of delight as Laika went bounding out of the room.

"Well hello, girl. What's that, you say? Ah, awake is she? Lovely." the familiar voice crooned, his footsteps growing closer as Su puller herself to her feet, striking a facsimile of a dignified pose against the door of the washroom just as Ford's head appeared in the doorway to her bunk. "Good morning to you, late riser."

"Just a power nap." Su raked her hand through her hair. "Now where were we?" She strode toward him, hoping with equal measure that he would both ignore the puddle of sick on her floor, and also kindly tell her what they had actually been doing, because she had no damn idea what had happened post-Kowloon.

"Oh no." he grinned at her, a manic, toothy thing that made her stomach turn a bit. "You were out of commission for a bit. Never seen anyone toss back a Gargle Blaster like that before. Let alone three! Though seeing as you left one and change outside the ship before we took off, I suppose you're within safe limits." His casual yammering made her head spin, and she leaned against the wall, trying to parse everything he had said when the last bit caught up to her.

"Took... took off?" She didn't know how she had missed it. The vibrations under her boots, the soft hum, the stars quietly passing them by in the window over her bunk. "Oh fuck! Fuck! Mari is going to kill me!"

"Is she really?! How fun!" Ford grinned at her before turning from the room and strolled toward the hall. "Wash up, why don't you? Meet us in the mess." He coughed, eyeing the pile of gargle-blasted remnants on the floor and rethinking his previous statement. "The dining hall, I mean." She called out after him, weak voice just breaking through his atonal whistling.

"Us?"

"Yes! Us!"

"Oh... Oh, gods..."

'Us' turned out to be his whole damn crew - a dreadful assembly of humanoids and aliens, all arguing loudly while rifling through the cabinets.

"You think they'd have some tea... or at least some crackers. Not just mustard. Though it is the good kind, with the seeds in it..." At least they hadn't found Mari's garden. It would be adding insult to injury if she caught up to them only to find her precious tomatoes gone.

"No booze to be found." A voice from behind caused Su, and in turn her head, to spin, brain objecting to the sight of the two-headed man emerging from the back of the ship. "Just a room filled with a plethora of the most repulsive organics I've ever seen."

"Orga- Zaphod do you mean a garden?!" A woman popped out unexpectedly from behind a counter, her sudden appearance felling an already unstable Su. She sighed at the cool of the metal against her cheek, admiring the boots just in front of her nose. 'Twas a good pair.

"I wouldn't call it that, per se..." The humans hurried past him, the clanking of their shoes on the metal floors vibrating into Su's brain, bringing up the final Gargle Blaster from the previous night as she sniffled pathetically, crawling beneath the table. Perhaps if she laid very still and very quiet, the gods would forget all about her existence and she could die. Ford patted her back sympathetically.

"There, there. I never can seem to keep them down either."

Mari never had liked sitting in the co-pilot's chair, even if it was next to Korben. In fact, perhaps less than usual next to Korben. Who would have thought the retired major would share a piloting style that rivaled Su's inimitable way with ships? She shook the last of her buzz off as he dropped out of hyper drive with a lurch, eyes falling to focus on the small beacon in her lap.

"Okay, up and to the left a bit."

"How far is a bit, exactly?"

"Dammit, I'm a pilot, not a navigator, Korben!"

"Hey, I'm more than happy to drop your pretty little ass over on that asteroid."

"Yes, sir. Sorry, sir."

"... Sir?" He slanted a look at her from the corner of his eyes, lips curling to the side. "I thought you wanted to find your ship, not play 'Major Hazes the Cadet'." He paused for a moment, eyes narrowing at her in thought. "You know, you do strike me kinda familiar..."

"THERE!" Mari thanked whatever celestial being chose to watch over this backwater galaxy as she spotted the rust-bucket so dear to her heart, just floating on the edge of an Oort cloud. "Quick, Dallas, let's go..."

"Keep your pants on." he grinned, reaching up to flip a switch here, a switch there, lights in the cabin of his small cruiser dimming as he eased the ship out from the shadow of the planet, edging slowly across the space between them and the Genrou. "Let's try it my way..." Something in the command of his voice brought her right back to her school days, and she felt a blush tint her cheeks.

"Yes, sir."

"Careful, Mari. I could get used to that." Somehow, he brought the ship up close enough to dock on the Genrou, the rusted hull not giving away any of its secrets as Korben opened the comm links. "Hawk hailing Genrou, Hawk hailing Genrou, over." He dropped the connection, the two listening to the static that crackled back at them. "Hawk hailing Genrou, Hawk hailing Genrou, come in, Genrou." He turned to her as the static crackled. "What's Genrou mean, anyway?"

"'Phantom wolf.'" she answered absently, her brow furrowed as she scanned her ship. Genrou's lights were all on, but there was nothing and no one to be seen.

"Who names their ship phantom wolf?"

"A dumb first mate, that's who." That was it. Su. This had to be part of her plan. Take the ship for a joy ride, revenge for snapping up Korben. It certainly wouldn't be the first time. Silly bint was probably hiding under the mess hall table, giggling herself silly right now. "What do you say we board?"

"Do I look like I have a death wish?"

"Not particularly, but I didn't paint you for a coward, neither. Now, c'mon." With a laugh, she aimed her best smirk at him, letting her eyelids fall to half mast. "Don't tell me the major ain't as brave as his best cadet?"

Su was most decidedly not laughing under the mess hall table. Still feeling the effects of last night's binge, she let a low, creaky groan escaped her chest, cutting through the argument between Zaphod's heads as he rifled through a cabinet, still searching for booze. If she didn't get this situation sorted right quick, Mae was never doing anything for her birthday ever again. Ford! What had that goddamn Betelgeusian put in her drinks last night? She never got bowled over this easy, not three drinks in. She was gonna get him for this. Show him what for, and what have you. All of that. Plus a little what not, for good measure.

Gorramit, pep talks were much too hard when she was this hung over!

First things first, she had to get rid of the gorram taste in her mouth. She'd been staring at the bottom of the table for the better part of five minutes, eyes tracing over the "Starwind wuz Here" scribbling over and over. Reaching up, she wrenched the newest half-chewed clump of bubblegum from the corner of the table, shoving the glob of sugary sweetness into her mouth as she slowly inched out from her hiding spot.

Next, upright, and then she'd see about moving.

"Pots, pans, condiments, organics... Where's the goddamn gin?" Zaphod huffed, knocking carefully stored utensils out of the cabinet before him. His other head was just beginning to reflect on the state of the ship's crew and their lack of priorities when a distinctly feminine voice cut through his thoughts.

"Oi." He turned to lambaste the girl with his new-found theories, but instead found himself collapsing sideways, both faces having just made none-too-gentle acquaintances with the bottom of Mari's cast-iron fry pan. The last thought in his head was, oddly enough, "Who is Jayne? And when was she here?" Su dropped the pan, hand clutching at her swirling stomach, as her boot found his ribs for good measure. A woozy smirk crossed her features as one of the two heads emitted a sharp grunt.

"No one drinks my gin, knee-biter."

Mari slid quietly through the airlock, Korben hot on her heels. He had pressed a small pistol to her hand moments before, any questions of her ability dying on his lips as she quickly and efficiently checked it over, her eyes peering down the sight before tucking it nearly in her waistband.

"What?" Mari's left eyebrow twitched in annoyance as Korben's throaty chuckle reached her ears.

"Nothing."

"You can wait on the Hawk, Major. " she hissed under her breath, scowling as she turned back down the hallway.

"And miss this?" the chuckle sounded again, earning him a growl as she held her hand up to silence him.

"Look, Dallas, you might have been hot shit back in your Alliance days. But this is my ship, and we fly by my rules. Shiny?" Korben blinked at her, something unreadable clicking into place behind his eyes as he nodded quietly, falling into step behind her. The two made their way down the hall, silent as shadows. Quick pointed gazes, the tilt of a chin, the gesture of two fingers led them in a tactical leapfrog along the hall until the sound of voices touched their ears, Mari's hand raising sharply to halt their progress. "The cockpit." Mari mouthed, pulling her pistol quietly from her waistband as she snuck closer, her back to the wall as she peered over her shoulder. An outrageously blonde woman sat in her chair - HER chair - manicured fingers touching every damn thing on the nav panel.

"Oooh, what does this button do?" the enthused female crooned, followed by the sound of wild beeping as she pressed a button at random. "Not good! Not good!" She mashed it again, silencing the alarm.

"Trillian, I don't think you should be touching anything. Ford said-"

"Oh, Ford can stuff it. I'm bored." She sat back, casting a dramatic pout at the mousy fellow who was trying to wring the last inch of life out of a rather threadbare towel. Mari swallowed the urge to march in and throttle them both as the woman resumed fidgeting with the control panel. Turning her attention back to Korben, she held up two fingers, pointing to the cockpit.

"Two in there. At least one more further in." She pointed down the hallway deeper into the ship. "We need to find Su."

"Sure you don't want me to shoot them?" He raised an eyebrow at her as she snuck past the open door.

"My ship, Dallas! My. Ship. Now come on." she hissed, slinking further down the hallway.

"Aye, aye, Captain."

Su stumbled from the mess, feeling a bit more like herself now that she had a wad of gum in her mouth and had caused a bit of violence. Though she still wasn't sure if she had imagined two heads on the man she had just laid end to end in the mess. Things were still a touch fuzzy. Thankfully she didn't need a clear head to find her way to the engine room, her feet leading her down the hallways she could have traveled blind if necessary. The way was blessedly clear, the collection of ship-jackers off to other parts of the ship.

"Messing with lord knows what, bunch of bastards." Su mumbled to herself, sliding through the hatch and into the engine rooms. "Not on my watch!" The engines purred softly, blithely unaware of the change in ownership that had occurred as the ship hovered quietly in space. Su traced her fingers lovingly over the engine casings in silent apology before she cracked open the console, ignoring the scratched "Kaylee + Su" as she buried her arms elbow deep in the jumble of gears and wires. She just had to stall them long enough for Mari to catch up. "Ok, boy, time to play."

Mari and Korben had made it as far as Su's bunk, looking for the woman and finding nothing more than a rumpled bed and a recently deposited pile of sick-up on one of Su's beloved threadbare Turkish throw rugs.

"Well, at least she's on the ship." Mari wrinkled her nose, tossing a towel over the mess and checking the washroom just in case her first mate had seen fit to pass out in it. "Hopefully she's alive, cause if someone else killed her before I-" Korben's hand suddenly slammed down over her mouth, silencing her as he forced her bodily against the wall while his free hand switched the lights off. Mari squealed in protest as his body pushed against her, earning a sharp hiss in her ear as Korben hushed her.

"What's that, girl?" the voice drifted down the hall toward them, growing louder as an eager yip sounded along side it. "Your mum, you say? Couldn't be. Just us here, see?" Mari could feel her heart pounding in her ears as the voice stilled beside Su's half open door. "Probably just her dirty socks you're smelling, my dear." Laika yipped again, her nose appearing in the doorway as she sniffed after Mari. "What say we fetch you a treat from the kitchens, yeah?" Another yip, and Laika's nose disappeared, her master forgotten in lieu of the promise of a treat as the two resumed their trek down the hallway. Mari and Korben both held their breath, waiting as the sound of feet faded in the distance. The scent of his aftershave tickled at her nose as she met his eyes in the dark, finding herself leaning into him. Korben's hand fell away from Mari's mouth, the feel of his fingers tracing down her arm breaking the momentary lapse of priorities.

"Gorram traitor of a dog." Mari cursed, squirming out from under Korben and peering out into the hallway. She slipped across the hall, motioning him to follow as she ushered him into her bunk, slipping the door closed with a careful hand.

"This isn't what I expected when you offered me a tour." Korben grumbles as he watched Mari rifling through her storage, pulling cases from hidden compartments scattered about the room and dropping them on top of the mattress. "What do you got in there?"

"Guns." Mari grunted as she heaved the last case from beneath her bed, neatly flipping the latch and tossing the lid open. "While I find being outnumbered with only a pistol exhilarating, I've always been one for tipping the odds in my favor." Korben's eyes widened as he took one of the weapons from its foam nest, turning it over in his hands.

"These are Alliance weapons. How did you get these?" Mari didn't miss a beat, pulling weapons from the cases and shouldering them with a neat efficiency as she spoke.

"By joining the Alliance." She sighed, too impatient for explanations. " Doesn't matter, you wouldn't -"

"Mari Peretti. No, Hermann, right?" That stopped her cold in her tracks, the long unused name bringing a pained look to her face. "I remember you. Damn girl, what happened to you? You were shooting up like a rocket, then you just... disappeared."

"Now is not the time, Dallas. We find Su, then we can swap sob stories, yeah?" He nodded quietly at her, shouldering his weapon and pulling another from the case when a great shudder shook the ship, the lights going dark.

"The fuck was that?" The emergency lights clicked on as a small alarm began to sound, a calm voice announcing an engine malfunction over the comms.

"That, Major Dallas, was Su." Mari's face split with a wide grin as she took off for the door, leaving Korben to stare after her before he collected himself enough to grab the unopened case on the bed and run along after her.