Danni let the last of the dream slip away as the sky became light. She couldn't remember a time in her life when she woke early enough to the see the sunrise. She was usually just getting to bed at dawn. Now she saw the sky light the morning almost every day. She opened her aqua blue vintage 60's train case. She kept her clothes and toiletries in a duffel bag when she was on tour, but this thrift store score was where she put her treasures. She rummaged for her tarot cards. The ones Nana Brigid left her when she passed. If the dreams were returning, she needed more tools. In her search for the tarot cards, she found a bar of honey jasmine soap, a scrapbook of band press clippings and photos and a bottle of pink glitter nail polish. Sophia would love that. Then she saw the knife. What was that doing in here?
It was Hayes' trench knife. He never let that thing, out of his sight. He loved it and knew she had always coveted it He collected knives and this was his rarest find. It was a working replica of a WWI trench knife. The blade was six inches of sharp steel attached to an oversized knuckleduster grip handle. What was it doing in her train case? He must have put it there before he'd left to explore the highway. A week ago? Seemed like ten years. He must have sensed danger and wanted her to have his knife in case he didn't come back. She realized it was the perfect Walker weapon. Great for skull crushing. I'll never leave home without it.
Finally, she found the cards. She unwrapped them from their black silk cloth and shuffled. She decided on a 3 card spread which revealed one's past, present and future. She sat cross-legged on her sleeping bag, held them against her chest and breathed in and out deeply. She shuffled again. She cut the deck into 3 piles to the left. Then pulled the top card from each. First card Death, second 10 of Swords, third 7 of Wands reversed.
The Death card can mean physical death but also a significant life change. 10 of swords indicated an ending of a situation. 7 of Wands reversed was losing a battle or fight through indecision. How did that relate to Daryl and the relationship growing between them? She wrote the spread down in her journal. I'll think about it later.
She heard noises as the camp woke. Sophia and Carl laughed and shouted as they started the first game of the day. Probably tag or something. Danni needed a bath in the lake. She hadn't done more than sponge herself off swith baby wipes since Merle interrupted her at the lake.
Even at this early hour the air was hot and the humidity rising. She took the worn jeans from yesterday and cut them, breaking her rule about never wearing shorts. She'd always felt like an awkward looking camp counselor in shorts, but the weather was too damn much out here. She put them on top of the pile to take to the lake that included clean bra and panties, black Motorhead t-shirt, belt, the honey jasmine soap, towel and Hayes' trench knife.
Breakfast noises and smells drifted her way. Coffee. She debated washing up in the lake or coffee first. Coffee. She'd grab her pile on the way back. She remembered the nail polish for Sophia.
She didn't bother to change out of what she'd slept in, men's plaid boxers and a white tank top. She just pulled on her engineer boots and headed over to the group, unconsciously keeping an eye out for Daryl. She knew she'd feel awkward seeing him so soon after her dream.
"Welcome back young lady." Dale welcomed her. "Feeling better today I hope?"
"Danni nodded pouring herself some coffee. She sat across from him, next to Glenn on an empty lawn chair.
"I feel like myself again."
"Good night's sleep will do that for you."
She nodded, almost laughing, remembering her dream.
Carol leaned down and handed Danni the items she'd washed for her. The clean clothes were neatly folded. She also gave her a bowl of oatmeal, with some blackberries freshly picked from the surrounding bushes. "Here eat this. You probably haven't had anything in days." Danni let Carol continue to mother her.
"Carol, is Sophia old enough?" Danni held up the bottle of pink nail polish.
"Of course. She'll love it."
The breakfast conversation indicated that Rick and Shane were still at their impasse about which direction to move the group. What they were both sure of was that the group was moving out the following morning. Rick was standing, Shane sat in a camp chair each saying their piece.
"We've been lucky so far. No Walkers have been inside the camp, but Shane and I saw signs that some are getting close."
"Like stealing my deer? " Daryl approached, from behind the RV. "I tracked that thing for a day and half and those pieces of shit started in on it soon as it fell. Filthy, disease-bearing, motherless poxy bastards, sons of-"
"Yes, animals have turned up half eaten." Rick cut him off.
Danni heard Daryl's voice and jumped up quickly. She dropped her coffee and the folded clothing.
"Hey, you okay?" Glenn asked.
"My head is starting to bother me again." She headed off without picking up her laundry.
"So, the threat is getting closer..." She heard Rick's voice grow fainter.
... ... ... .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .
Danni was about to grab her clothes and soap and head to the lake when she heard Daryl behind her.
"Can't get away from me fast enough, huh." He was carrying the laundry she had dropped earlier. She took it from him wordlessly.
"This about last night?" He asked
"Last night?"
"What I did to you last night?"
"What?" It came out louder than she meant. "What you did to me last night?"
Daryl felt that it wasn't like her to be so jumpy, so distant. "Yeah, last night I cussed you out about Merle. Just don't like talking about him."
She didn't answer.
"What's got you so spooked girl? I don't see snakes on the ground or lightning in the sky."
"I have stuff to do. You need to go."
He grunted. "Just came to bring you your clothes. Carol wanted me to." Women. She's as high and mighty as the rest. Ain't gonna give me the time a day no more. Whatever. He thought as he trudged away.
She hated feeling like she had to hide from anybody, but she couldn't shake the sense that if she looked at him he'd see her dream, frame by frame like a film playing through her mind. What would be so bad about that? He'd laugh. I know he'd laugh. Or worse.
She picked up her pile of clean clothes and soap and headed for the lake. Finally time for that bath.
"Hey Danni, my mom said you had a present for me." Sophia had followed Danni back to her van. The girl waited until Daryl had walked away, then approached
"Aw yeah, munchkin." She pulled the bottle of nail polish from inside her boot.
"Pink, it's pretty." Sophia remarked less excited than Danni expected. She'd been through so much and she was just a little girl.
"Yes, it is. We can't forget pretty things. Right? Not ever?"
"Not ever." Sophia smiled.
"It sparkles too. How about we do a manicure after I get cleaned up?"
Sophia nodded, smiling. "Can I come with you?"
"Sure thing little bug. Just you though. No boys allowed, right?"
"Right."
Amy was already in the water when Danni and Sophia reached the lake. She had on a bikini and was lathering herself with a soapy washcloth.
"Oh, it's you two." She remarked when she saw Danni and Sophie.
"Don't worry," Sophia called to her. "No boys allowed."
Amy laughed. "Too bad.'
"Why did she say that?" Sophia asked Danni.
"Beats me, honey."
... ... .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . .
Daryl tread lightly, and listened for any rustling in the underbrush. He was still pissed about the wasted deer; squirrel or rabbit would have to do. He sensed movement to his left and heard the scrape of claws on tree bark before he saw the squirrel. It stopped, halfway up the tree. He raised his crossbow and lined the rodent up in his sight He pulled his bow back and...Missed.. What is with me. That goddamned girl.
He couldn't stop thinking about Danni's coldness toward him that morning. She shut him down; told him to leave. He usually did that to her, not the other way around. It was bothering him. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, Daryl was reluctantly developing a friendship with her. After her injury in Atlanta, he realized it would be boring as hell without her around. He liked their run- ins; liked saving her ass and giving her shit. She gave it right back. She didn't whine and bitch like everybody else in camp. She didn't give a rat's ass what anyone else thought of her.
What did I do now? Figures I messed it up. Maybe she's expecting me to make a move on her. Nah, she never flirts or nothin'. Not really. That was one of the things that made him comfortable around her. He didn't know how to react when a woman came on to him, flirted or tried to get close to him. Danni just acted normal, like he was a person, not a guy or some kind of challenge. Just a person. She wasn't always trying to get in his head or his pants, like every other girl he'd known. He remembered the time she gave him a hard on. It wasn't on purpose. He was holding her up to get that damn ladder in Atlanta during the search for Merle. Still, although it embarrassed him, it got him a little excited. If there was anybody I could be interested in... He rid himself of the thought. Nothing like that would ever happen. It never did. He certainly wasn't going to push her up against a tree and...
He sat on a boulder, chewing on a stalk of grass. He hated remembering shit. When he turned 16, Merle took him to see Rosie, the local working girl in town. It was between her and Merle's favorite Cherry. Merle figured Rosie would be better for a first time. Daryl could do it on a bed, not in the truck. Her house was at the edge of their town, by the interstate. Trucks roared by all day and night.
"Bout time you became a man." Merle announced to Daryl as he paid the woman in advance. "Go easy on him baby." He winked at her. She smiled and kissed Merle, right there, as if Daryl wasn't even in the room. He wished he wasn't. "Enough of that sugar, save it for my little brother."
Rosie led the teenager into her bedroom while Merle sat on the couch drinking a beer and watching television. Ten minutes later Daryl exited the room and fled straight out the front door.
"Produced the juice before you put it in the caboose." Merle said when came outside. He laughed. "It happens. Not to me mind ya, but..." he kept smiling. "We'll wait a couple of hours then you'll go on back in there."
Daryl refused so Merle wouldn't let him in the truck. Daryl walked the three and half miles home. On his birthday. The next day his nickname was Speedy Gonzales. Merle and his buddies got a lot of mileage for ridicule out of that one.
Thanks, big brother.
Since that first experience. Daryl hadn't known how to build any confidence around women. He never had a high school girlfriend or any real friends for that matter. He was loner who quit at 17, a month before before graduation. His grades had been good enough for a diploma, but no one in his family had graduated high school. He knew it would be dangerous to be the first. Merle and his dad would think he was trying to be better than them. The shit he'd get would be worse than ever.
Daryl didn't understand what the hell women wanted, or how to talk to them. He only had Merle, but deep down, he knew he wasn't like his older brother. Merle treated women like shit and they ate it up. He pushed them around, insulted them and still they were all over him. Daryl guessed that's what a real man did so he felt less than a man. Merle took what he wanted. Women were just things, trash. It confused Daryl. Why did they stay around? He grew up listening to Merle's crude sex advice. He could hear Merle, now, in his head:
"My favorite way to do a bitch is the bronco. Listen and learn little brother. You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab her tits as tight as possible and yell another girls name. Makes her mad as a hornet. This gives you the feeling of riding a wild bronco as she tries to buck you off."
Daryl couldn't understand why a woman would stand for it, but he'd never have told Merle that.
Their small north Georgia mountain town's population numbered less than 300. Everybody knew everybody else's business. They may have been the "no good Dixons" but women outnumbered men by at least 40. Ladies weren't so choosy. Most of them liked that bad boy image Merle cultivated. Being Merle Dixon's younger, quieter and some said, more attractive brother, provided Daryl plenty of opportunity for sex. However, any attempt had ended in his getting too drunk to finish. He hated thinking about this shit. He wished he was getting drunk now.
The girls back home were all the same. Bottle blondes, who bought their tans and fingernails. They hung in packs, talking loud, smoking Marlboro Lites, drinking wine coolers. They'd ask to play him at pool and end up hanging all over him, messing with his shots. Laughing and flirting. Touching his arms and chest. It unnerved him. He would always feel 16 again.
"Dammit boy! They ain't interested in playing pool, they want to play something else. You stupid or what?" Merle taunted. Everyone would be laughing at him, Merle loudest of all. Daryl would push the girl off of himself and stalk over to the bar for another shot and a beer. If the she didn't end up leaving with Merle and Daryl didn't end up in a brawl, she'd sit with him until he got drunk enough to go home with her. After that, his memory got fuzzy. He'd wake up feeling like shit, the woman from the night before giving him a look that was either hateful or just filled with pity. He'd leave, unable to say a word. It was the same thing every time. After a while, his reputation stopped most women from bothering with him. So yeah, he had a secret. He was still a virgin.
He spent most of his time in the woods alone. It didn't matter there. He'd stay out hunting for days. That made sense to him. Females made no sense and he didn't want to deal with the bullshit.
His mind returned to Danni. She was unlike any woman he'd come across before. She did everything she could to look as unlike the girls from back home as possible. He liked her black hair against the palest skin he'd ever seen. Her tattoos looked like real paintings, not the tramp stamps and shitty butterflies on shoulders or ankles back home. Her clothing was tight and showed off her shape, but it wasn't overly revealing. He liked that he had to imagine what she looked like underneath her jeans and t-shirts. He wanted to touch the tattoos on her hip bones. Those swallows always peeked out. He could tell she was a girl who'd never wear shoes she couldn't run in. Above all, she'd never let Merle treat her like trash. She didn't take shit. He liked that too.
He shook his head. Back to reality, boy. No way in hell would a punk rock, city girl like her be interested in a stupid, backwoods hick like me. So why did she talk to him? His defenses nagged him with questions and put downs. Women never thought he was worth talking to and after the way she'd acted that morning, he guessed she realized it now. She saw him for what he was. I shouldn't have gotten so riled last night when she mentioned Merle.
He heard Sophia first. The girl screamed in terror. He jumped up as her voice pierced the silence. It was coming from the woods between the lake and camp. Then Danni started swearing and yelling. It was Walkers. He couldn't see where she was, but he followed the sound of her fight voice.