I am brought back to the present by Haymitch's words.

"So, it is decided. I will try to keep you all updated as much as I can. Plutarch will make sure they have the wire you need, Beetee."

I shake my head in confusion. "What does a wire have to do with anything, Haymitch. How can we get out of the arena with a wire?"

Mags laughs, but Haymitch glares at me," Weren't you listening to anything that I just said?"

I shake my head.

"Nope."

Haymitch roles his eyes, and Johanna brings me up to speed.

"Plutarch has given us some information about the arena. There will be some source of electricity that we will need to channel, and reflect into a chink in the force field. The wire is necessary for us to be able to do that."

I nod. I don't really understand the whole plan, but if we have a head gamemaker on our side, I am sure it will work.

"Ok."

"Listen up from now on," Haymitch exclaims," We don't have time to go repeating everything."

I roll my eyes. Only in this group can I be myself without worrying about getting hurt. "Haymitch, wasn't there some issue at this year's reaping where you missed an entire speech? And then embarrassed the District when you did show up?" I wink at him, and he scowls. The other victors laugh.

Except Mags. She doesn't exactly approve of making fun at another's expense, no matter the circumstance. She gives me a disapproving glance, but I ignore it. She isn't my mother, after all.

Haymitch clears his throat, and we all quiet down. If we didn't have such limited time, we would have ignored him too, but our time here is coming quickly to an end.

"So, you all understand the plan then? Just remember, no one else knows. We can not trust anyone else."

Mags cuts in then," What about your tributes? Are Katniss and Peeta going to be let in on the plan?"

Haymitch shakes his head,"No. They still have to large a part to play, and I do not want to give anything away by telling them. Katniss is not the best actor, and she needs to act naturally to pull this off. And telling Peeta but not Katniss would be foolish."

Johanna immediately picks up on the problem with this," But how are we going to get her to ally with us? She doesn't seem like the most trusting type. She'd probably shoot us in the back from fear that we would do the same to her."

Haymitch nods. "I know. We have struggled with that problem ourselves. Beetee and Wiress she will want as allies. That is how she is. Johanna, she would probably kill you on sight, unless she had reason not to. Same with you, Finnick. But she will want Mags as an ally. Peeta will go along with whoever she wants. Forcing both Finnick and Johanna on her at once could very well be disastrous. We need to play this right. So we came up with what we think could be a solution. She will learn quickly that Finnick and Mags are a team. Neither of you will leave the other behind. So, if we can find a way, and I don't know how yet, but if we can, to get her to accept Finnick, knowing that she gets Mags as well, then we can give them a few days to trust each other, and then bring Johanna into it. Johanna will stay with Beetee and Wiress, until we send her a sign that it is time to meet up with the others. Once Katniss has decided to trust Finnick, she will have to trust Johanna, especially if she shows up with Beetee and Wiress in tow. And like I said, Peeta will follow whatever Katniss wants. Or so I presume."

His plan is a little difficult to follow, but I get the main idea. Basically, I have to play nice and get Katniss to like me, however I decide to do that. Then I find some way to get her to ally with me, without killing me. And I am not allowed to kill her, no matter what.

"Seems like I get the worst end of that plan, Haymitch. She makes one snap decision and I'm dead," I comment.

"Well, then, Finnick, you will have to do what the President wants. Play nice. Be someone she will like. It's what you are supposed to do, anyway."

Haymitch's words sting. I know he didn't mean for them to injure me, but they have, and deeply. Play nice. Be someone she will like. So, I am not nice, and not likable, unless I am acting? Is that it. I feel a gentle squeeze on my shoulder, and find that Mags has come up behind me. She understands.

"Fine, Haymitch. I'll do what you want. But I can't promise that I won't disable her in some way if she tries to kill me. I'll keep her alive, though."

I can tell Haymitch isn't pleased with my response, but he knows he can't ask me for more than that. Besides, his careless comment didn't place him in my book of favorites at the moment.

"Is that it?" Johanna questions.

Haymitch nods, not taking his eyes off of me. "Ya, you can go. I want to talk to Finnick here, for a moment."

I want to lower my eyes from his, but I don't. I stare into them. I feel Mags lift her hand from my shoulder, and I want to ask her to stay, but I can't. I'm not a boy anymore.

When everyone has left, Haymitch finally releases my gaze for a moment. Then cuts to the heart of the issue.

"How's Annie?"

I realize immediately what he is saying. What he is trying to do.

"She's fine."

Haymitch nods," And do you want her to stay that way?"

My hands clench into fists. "What do you think?"

"I think she is in a heap of danger if you keep up this attitude, Finnick. Snow's not one to play nice. What do you think would happen if you, say, disabled Katniss and then let her live? That would not be playing the Games properly. Snow would suspect something. We would lose what may be our only chance. If you suddenly act all friendly towards Katniss, we would lose our chance, because Snow would notice the difference in you. If you kill Katniss, we lose our chance for obvious reasons. And if we lose our chance, we lose what may be the only opportunity we will ever have to free Panem. Are you so selfish that you can't see this? Mags has volunteered to take Annie's place, or the place of whoever's name is called. Do you think she has a large chance of surviving to see the end of the Games. No. You do, Finnick. If you play your part correctly. But don't let your desire to preserve your own life ruin the chance to save the lives of thousands."

He stops then, and stares at me, waiting for a response.

It is not fair. His accusation. I have been through far more in my life than he has. And where will he be? Not in the arena, but watching safely from afar. He has no right to talk to me like this. And yet, something within me tells me that he has every right. That I have been selfish in my thoughts. That my desire for a life with Annie has clouded my courage. That I have slowly begun to become who Snow wants me to be, rather than just playing the part.

"You're right, Haymitch. I'm sorry. I've been under a lot of stress lately. This isn't the real me. I hope you know that."

Haymitch nods. He does know.

"I just wanted to help you find yourself again," he tells me,"You are a complex piece in this game, Finnick. But you are truly good at heart, and I know that you would give you life for Annie or for Panem in an instant. I ask you now to give your life, if need be, not for an assured ending, or a certain defeat. But I ask you to give your life for hope."

I smile softly,"For hope, Haymitch? It has been long since we have had any hope. But if even a sliver has shown itself, then I will do whatever it takes to bring it to pass."

Haymitch nods," I knew you would." Then he stands up.

"The ceremony for the victors is tomorrow, and then there are interviews and other appearances to complete. Katniss must play her role perfectly. The difficulty is that she does not know what her role is."

I nod. "I am staying a few days longer, as well."

"Snow?" Haymitch questions.

I nod. My stomach regains the sick feeling that I carry with me most days. "Perhaps it would be better if I died. Annie would not be stuck with Snow's sex symbol as a husband," I say bitterly. I am close to tears again.

Haymitch shakes his head,"You are so much more than that, Finnick."

I meet his eyes again. "No, Haymitch. I'm not. I don't even know who I am anymore. It is so difficult to play a role that I am hated for. Sometimes I wish I had died in that arena. The concept of a victor is just a sick twist of the Capitol, because we are anything but victorious. Sometimes I wish I was dead, and the rest of us too. It would be better. There is no hope for us."

Haymitch places both his hands on my shoulders, and I slowly raise my head to meet his eyes.

"There is always hope."