{Scene 1}
One of Jonathan's mansions
Enter Jonathan and Franklin
JONATHAN Make sure he finds this money so as to not believe it is I who furnishes him, Franklin.
FRANKLIN Have no fear. Money is easily lost in Philadelphia.
JONATHAN You would gain my favour if you were to inquire of his behavior and actions while you are there.
FRANKLIN Great minds do indeed think alike, as I had intended already to do so.
JONATHAN Very well said. While you are there inquire also of the girls' houses, and make note if they know him or not, and if so whom and at what price. If they catch on, you will merely tell them you are a family friend. Mark you this?
FRANKLIN Yes, very well.
JONATHAN If he partake of such wild sport be sure to discredit him, mark, not enough to dishonour him, just enough to scare him away from it.
FRANKLIN A fun game, my lord.
JONATHAN If it comes to it say you caught him drinking, fencing, or quarrelling.
FRANKLIN I thought you had ordered not to dishonour him?
JONATHAN In faith. Do not make a royal scandal out of a girl, but he does not scare easily either. Now, what was I about to say?
FRANKLIN Something along adaptive slander, I do surmise.
JONATHAN Indeed, but slander be such an ugly word. Tell the conjugate of what he does, but tell it in a way that scares without slandering. You understand, do you not?
FRANKLIN Indeed, I do.
JONATHAN God be with you, and long live the king.
FRANKLIN May God be with you as well.
Exit Franklin, Enter Eve
JONATHAN How goes it, Eve?
EVE Oh father! I am so afraid I know not what t' do!
JONATHAN By what dear one?
EVE Whilst I practiced my embroidery, he, he hath approached me in good faith, but was of a horrendous appearance, his wig askew, his shoes unbuckled, he made a marvelous racket, and his shirt with stains down the front-
JONATHAN And what then?
EVE He grabbed me by the limb, and forcefully did he stare at me, just stood there, and offered up a deep and hideous sigh as if he meant to cause a quake!
JONATHAN Come. There is one person who can overrule this young rascal. Let us go before Edward, who can, if nothing else, cut off his allowance thereby restricting his time to you. We shall see this matter resolved soon, fret not. Have you spoken I'll towards him of late? I am sorry this has happened, darling.
EVE No! But I did as you demanded and did deny all his letters and access to me of late!
JONATHAN And that hath made the Gugalanna angry. I am sorry I had not used better judgment and allowed him to see the current treasure of his eye, as I feared he only trifled with you, and would discard as soon as another came along. Let us go to see the authority on the matter, and beseech intervention.
{Scene 2)
Inside the trade center
Enter Edward, Elizabeth, John and Jéan
EDWARD Welcome both John and Jéan! Know that while we have longed to see you recent accounts have forced our summons. You may have heard a tad about Thamle's behaviour, and being such close friends of his we had hoped you might entreat yourselves to his company and discover the source of denial, as it isn't just a river, is it, gentlemen? We wish to know if we can tame the water that would engulf him, and you being his friends of young age but whom have drifted apart could see nobody better for the task a' hand.
ELIZABETH Yes good gentlemen, nary an ugly word has he said of you, and I know that he would adhere to you like a soldier to his gun! If you can serve as would fit a king, a king's remembrance shall you be granted, I might add.
JOHN& JEAN We will both obey, and give ourselves up in full to be a tool of your desires.
EDWARD We thank you, John and Jean.
ELIZABETH Indeed, thank you, and I would ask of you to pay visit to my too changed already son. Someone, take him to wherever Thamle sulketh.
JOHN We shall make ourselves useful to both you and him!
ELIZABETH I would hope so!
Exit John, Jean, and attendants
Enter Jonathan
JONATHAN The Ambassadors have returned for the West, my good sovereign.
EDWARD You prove yourself again to be the bearer of good news.
JONATHAN I have? I would first assure you that I treat my duties as I would mine own soul, and treat my sovereign as my God: Being said, I do believe I have found the source of Thamle's disturbance.
EDWARD Do tell, of that I long to hear.
JONATHAN First allow admittance to the ambassadors, my news shall be the crown of the feast.
Exit Jonathan
He does claim to know the source of Thamle's lunacy.
ELIZABETH I doubt it be anything other than the main cause, his father's death and our perhaps too hasty marriage.
EDWARD Well, we shall put his fears to rest.
Re-enter Jonathan, with David and James
Welcome good friends! What news from our french friends?
JAMES They send their most fair greetings and tides of their desires. Upon hearing of our message, he sent out to suppress his nephew's levies, which he was told was an expeditionary force 'gainst the savages; but, better looked into, he found it was truly against us, at which point he cursed his foolishness and bode his nephew come, at which point he was refuted and told to come to him. So being, he sent out an arrest and was then promptly obeyed, and Louis received a harsh rebuke and promised not to attack your majesty again, at which point old Claude, so overjoyed, offered 2 million francs in annual fee as commission to employ these men against the savages to the west, and enclosed another treaty requesting your permission to travel through our domain for this operation.
EDWARD Why, this likes us well, and we shall discuss and read further on't later. We humbly thank you both for your service in this regard,now, go to your rest and tonight we shall hold a massive feast!
Exit James and David
JONATHAN A good end to an uncertain business, and now we arrive at my purpose. Think on this, I have a daughter who, in her obedience, has delivered to me this letter:
"To the apple of my eye, the most beautiful Eve" That's a horrid phrase, vile indeed to use the term "beautiful" in such a context, but you shall hear further. "In her excellent white bosom-"
ELIZABETH This was given to her by Thamle?
JONATHAN Worry not madam, I shall finish, "You may doubt that the sun is bright, You may doubt truth and call it lies, you may even doubt that the bodies in the sky move, but never doubt that I love you. I love you and only you, the thought of losing you makes me faint at heart. Adieu. Yours only and forever yours, Thamle." This, in her obedience, is what she has delivered to me. I hear and see all that occurs between them.
EDWARD How has she felt towards his advances?
JONATHAN What do you think of me?
EDWARD A man of faith and honour.
JONATHAN I would that I would prove it. But what would you do, if you had seen this hot, mad, and wildly misplaced love as I had perceived it? Would you have stood by as events against your being unfolded before you? I naturally told my one and only daughter, the pride of my patrimony, that "Thamle is out of your league and should not be pursued." Then I bade her cut off her contact with him and receive no letters or gifts from her. After she had done so, he fell into depression, then wouldn't eat, which led to weakness, which led to a lightening of the mind, and therefore into the madness where he is now confined, and whom we now all are concerned for.
EDWARD Do you think it is so?
ELIZABETH It is possible.
JONATHAN Has there been a time in which I have said tis so when it is not?
EDWARD Not of which I am knowing. How may we inquire about this?
JONATHAN He ambles for hours in the courtyards, you know.
ELIZABETH Indeed.
JONATHAN When he is in such a state again I will let loose my daughter unto him and meanwhile we shall be hiding in wait behind and shall mark the encounter, if he doesn't love her and she is not the reason for his falling into madness, do not strip my rank and position of me.
EDWARD We shall try.
ELIZABETH Look, here he comes, but at least he is reading.
JONATHAN Away, quickly I do beseech, I will confront him.
Exit Edward and Elizabeth, enter Thamle, reading.
How are you, my good Thamle?
THAMLE Well, who goes there?
JONATHAN Do you not recognize me?
THAMLE Indeed, you are the peasant stable attendant.
JONATHAN Not I.
THAMLE I wish only that you were an honest man.
JONATHAN Honest! Think you not before you speak?
THAMLE Aye peasant, they say to be honest is to be one in ten thousand.
JONATHAN Aye, that tis true.
THAMLE But now that you have stated as such, can I be one to believe it? But wait, if the maggots breed by the sun in the dead carrion, but the sun is a god- Do you have a daughter, peasant?
JONATHAN I have.
THAMLE Do not let her socialize. Conception is a blessing: but not if it be her who conceives. Look to it, Sirrah.
JONATHAN (Aside) What can one say to that? He still recognizes my daughter through me, yet he could not recognize me if his life depended on it. He said I was a stable boy, and he is gone, far gone, but truly in my youth did I suffer from such pangs of love, very near driving me to the very same as he hath reached.
What are you reading, good Thamle?
THAMLE Words, words. Words! My good stableman, the likes of which are beyond your ability to understand.
JONATHAN What is the matter?
THAMLE The matter between whom?
JONATHAN I mean, of what do you read?
THAMLE I read of slanderous accounts of an old man who bumped his head and could not get up in the morning, with his face all wrinkled and eyes dark and soft, the pouches dark and filled with age with a mouth-full of teeth made up entirely of gums, all of which while being true of your typical old man, though I hold it not to heart, as you are older than I and yet you see in the vision of vultures while I fly backwards.
JONATHAN (Aside) While it is clearly madness, there is some shred of logic embedded within.
Will you walk out of the air?
THAMLE Into my own grave.
JONATHAN Indeed, that is out of the air. (Aside) How thoughtful his whims seem to be! There is present a happiness which fuels the madness, which unfortunately the reason and sanity are not receiving. I will leave him, and plan the meeting between he and my daughter. -I will take my leave of you, and leave you to ponder your words.
THAMLE You cannot take from me anything else that I would rather part with, except my life.
JONATHAN Fare you well, Thamle.
Exit Jonathan
THAMLE What a tedious old fool! He cannot see the truth when spoken straight to him.
Enter John and Jean
JONATHAN There is Thamle, go speak to him.
JEAN May God save you, sir!
Exit Jonathan
JOHN My most honored friend!
JEAN My best of friends in all the world!
THAMLE Ah, John et Jean! Good boys, how hast thou fared?
JOHN&JEAN The same as ever, happy, but not too happy mind you, and have ur share from the cup of fortune.
THAMLE Ah! Tell me, is she for you a sweet wine or a darkened ale?
JOHN Aye, more alike an ale than a wine.
THAMLE What's the news?
JOHN None new to you, but that the world has grown honest since last we spoke.
THAMLE Then doomsday truly is near: but fortunately your news is not true. Let me ask you, why have you travelled to the rim of the cup of fortune to visit this horrid place?
JEAN Horrid? Why say you that?
THAMLE Ohio itself is one massive prison. The colonials to the East, the French to the West, the savages clawing at the sides, and my family all about me.
JOHN Well then, the entire world is a prison for you, isn't it?
THAMLE Some parts better than others, but Ohio being one of the worst.
JEAN We think not so.
THAMLE Good for you. It must seem a blessing to be a warden, but to me it is a prison.
JOHN It is only so if you believe it to be so!
THAMLE Shall we advance?
JEAN We'll wait upon you.
THAMLE I will not mix you in with the other servants, even though I am dreadfully pursed to do so. In other matters, tell me as a friend, what brings you to Ohio?
JOHN To visit you, no other such occasion would bring us forth to a "prison", as you say.
THAMLE Poor as I am I am even poor in thanks, but tell me now the reasoning. Were you not sent for? Is it truly of your own inclination that you wished to visit? Come, do not try to fool me, speak up.
JEAN What do you wish to hear us say?
THAMLE Why, anything, so long as you would admit being sent for, as there is a look of guilt lingering on you even now, as you have not enough craft to colour your feelings: I know my parents sent for you.
JOHN To what end?
THAMLE Sometimes must the student be the teacher. Tell me now as our friendship relies on it, were you sent for, or not?
JEAN (to John) What say you?
THAMLE (aside) If ever they did like me, they are required to speak the truth.
JEAN We were sent for.
THAMLE I shall tell you now the reason for my "disease' to prevent your discovery and subsequent allocation to my parents. I have of late -but why, I know not- lost all my joy, stopped exercising, and indeed the entire Earth seems like a prison to me. What a piece of work is man! how noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world! the paragon of animals! And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? man delights not me: no, nor woman neither, though by your smiling you seem to say so.
JOHN We had no such thoughts.
THAMLE Why then did you laugh upon hearing 'man delights not me'?
JEAN We laughed in irony, at ourselves. We have brought forth actors, my friend, whom we had hoped could entertain you and you them.
THAMLE Which actors?
JOHN Even those whom you currently delight in, the tragedians of the city.
THAMLE How are they? Have they grown rusty?
JEAN No, their constant practice on other audiences can assure of that.
Flourish of trumpets
Those would be the actors.
THAMLE Gentlemen, gentlemen! You are welcome here to the company, come now, it is only polite of me to give you garments for you trials; and you are welcome, but my fathcle and aunther are deceived.
JOHN In what?
THAMLE I am only mad when the wind blows from the north-north-west, when the wind is from elsewhere my mind is as sharp as a hacksaw.
Enter Jonathan
JONATHAN Hi Ho and Welcome merry gentlemen!
THAMLE Listen gentlemen, that man is naught more than a baby, and is yet to grow out of his diapers.
JEAN They do say an old man is twice a child.
THAMLE I do prophecize that he is arrived to tell me of the arrival of the actors.
JONATHAN Thamle do I have news for you!
THAMLE But my stable man! I have news for you a'swell! Rome did fall long ago!
JONATHAN The actors have come forward.
THAMLE Oh, pish pish!
JONATHAN By my word-
THAMLE And so came each actor being dragged upon his rear-
JONATHAN They are the best actors in the world, whether for tragedy, comedy, history, pastoral, pastoral-comical, historical-pastoral, tragic-historical, tragic-comic-historical-pastoral, or even Tragic-Historic-Parodic-Comedic-Pastoral. Hamlet is not too heavy nor The Shrew too light, if you want credible actors, these are the only ones.
THAMLE What a brilliant treasure you have!
JONATHAN What treasure are you referring to?
THAMLE Why, you have a daughter.
JONATHAN (Aside) And still he talks on my daughter.
THAMLE Well, am I right?
JONATHAN I do have a daughter whom I love well.
Enter players
THAMLE Ah. Sirrah, take these fine men to their rooms. I wish to speak with the troup leader.
Exit all but Thamle and First Actor
THAMLE Tell me, have you enacted the play of Hamlet, the one old Jon mentioned earlier?
FIRST ACTOR Aye.
THAMLE We will be enacting it on the morrow. You could, if need be, memorize a few more lines were I to insert them into the play?
FIRST ACTOR Aye.
THAMLE Very well. Now, follow the buffoon but mock him not.
Exit Troup leader
My good friends, I bid thee goodnight.
JOHN and JEAN We shall see you shortly!
Exit John and Jean
Now I am alone at last. Oh, what a rascal am I! When the actors enact the play, it could enforce upon him to force his soul into confession. Once he makes his conscience known, and my father's intent along with it, I will be given no excuse to avoid the command. The spirit which I have seen may be the devil, but once these actors perform the play I shall look upon my uncle and tell for certain. The play's the thing wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king.
Exit