Disclaimer: I do not own KNB or the picture or the song.
Days past, and my mom remained at my side. She spoke with my school, and they agreed to keep this a secret. As far as they're concerned, I was on a break. They sent their regards, but I didn't care about it.
As the days past, I grew weaker and thinner. The heartache from Kise was still there, I could feel it everyday. But it was mixed with the chest pain from the disease. My body was getting thinner and thinner, and even though my mom tried to feed me, I had no appetite. I was always tired and at night, I could not sleep. Fevers come and go at random times, but no matter what I did, I was always so cold. Coupled with the empty feeling that Kise left me, it was so damn fucking painful. But the worse were the coughs that plagued me. They never went away, and sometimes it got so worse that I coughed up blood.
Even as I went through this, my mother remained faithfully at my side. Although I told her that it was alright, that she could leave because the sight of me suffering caused her so much pain. She always said what kind of a mother is she if she couldn't help me with my disease. I'm so thankful that she was with me during the painful days.
On the table next to my bed, was many many paper cranes. My mother heard of the rumor that if you fold 1000 paper cranes, then you will get one wish. No matter how ridiculous it sounded to me, my mother fiercely believed in it, folding them whenever she had the chance. I think we had about 500 by now. And I… I didn't believe in them. But Mother was so hopeful, and she believed in it, I didn't have the heart to tell her otherwise. I just watched her fold the cranes hour after hour, day after day. I couldn't help, my hands so weak and thin to fold them properly, but Mother always helped me. The ones that I made were so ugly and beautiful compared to the ones that she made, but she always cried in happiness every time I made one. For her sake, I would do anything. So that it would help with her pain.
On this day, I was reading on my bed, flipping the pages slowly as my eyes scanned the words. I sighed and closed the book. I looked out the window and sighed enviously at the people was a knock on my door, and I said, "Come in." Thinking it was a nurse. Imagine my surprise when it was Kise. My book dropped on my lap, as I stared wide eyed at him.
"Mae-cchi…" he said, looking at me. I winced and looked the other way. I knew how horrible I looked. "You look...different."
I smiled weakly, "Kise-kun. What brings you here?"
He walked closer to me and sat down on the chair, "My mother wanted to know if you were okay and sent me here. Are you alright? You look…" he trailed off. But his eyes didn't leave my body.
I laughed weakly, "Yeah, I collapsed because of lack of sleep. Exams are coming up, and I guess I focused too much on studying and forgot about everything else."
"Oh," was all he said.
"I'm sorry," Kise apologized after a while.
I looked at him in surprise, "Why are you apologizing?" That and why do people keep on apologizing to me?
"I haven't been...the best friend to you. I ignored you for the longest time. I'm really sorry for that," Kise looked at me, "Will you forgive me?" he grasped my hand and looked straight at me.
My cheeks turned red as I tried to retract my hand back. Keyword, tried. "I forgive Kise-kun, now can I have my hand back?" I asked softly.
"Promise you're not mad?" he insisted, still not giving me my hand back. He had on the most serious face I've ever seen him outside the court.
"I promise, I swear on Ki-chan's life," I said, half joking, half serious. His expression relaxed, and Kise's face once again had a bright smile on his face
"You still have it with you?" he asked me cheerfully, letting go of my hand.
I pointed to the huge stuffed animal at the bottom of my head. "He's a he, not an it," I pouted hugging it close to me. As creepy as if sounds, it had the faint smell of Kise, a strong cologne with the natural scent of lemons.
I looked at him closely, "Kise-kun, have you gotten enough sleep?" His normally perfect model skin was slightly pale and he had bags under his eyes. Not to mention he looked as if he hasn't been eating much.
He winced, "You can tell huh? We lost against Too. I guess I took it a little bit hard."
A little bit doesn't even begin to describe it. "Too huh. That's the team where Ahomine went right?" I smiled nostalgically.
His eyes looked annoyed for a second before it was cheerful again. "Yeah, Momo-cchi goes there too."
"Oh really? I guess since she's Ahomine's childhood friend. She has to take care of him after all," I said distractedly. Blinking, I looked at Kise. "Why don't you take a nap?"
"What?" he asked, his golden eyes looking at me bewilderedly.
"You're tired right? Why don't you take a nap?" I offered, "I promise I will be on the lookout for fangirls so that they won't ambush you."
"I don't know. I don't want to bother you…" Kise muttered unsurely but I knew that he was just saying that to be polite.
I smiled softly at him, "It's not a bother." He smiled at me and layed his head on his arms. His body was bent as his upper body was lenaed on the bed as he sat on the chair.
"Can you sing me to sleep. Like you did when we were younger?" he asked me sleepily.
I sighed but complied. I could never say no to him. Kise knew that as well, and used it against me a lot. But never for cruel things, just accompanying him to go buy ice cream or helping him study for tests. Once in a while it was for a prank or two.
"Alright," I smiled softly at him. "If I die young, bury me in satin. Lay me down on a bed of roses, sink me in a river at dawn. Send me away with the words of a love song." I sang softly, looking at his peacefully slumbering body, I felt the pain of the heartbreak all over again. But I forced myself to continue. "Lord make me a rainbow, I'll shine down on my mother. She'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors. And life ain't always what you think it ought to be, no. Ain't even grey, but she buries her baby. The sharp knife of a short life, oh well. I've had just enough time...If I die young…" My voice cracked as I choked down a sob.
"You're so cruel Kise-kun," I whispered, "It would have been better if you had stayed away. Everything you do, every smile you smile, every laugh you laugh, you make me fall in love with you more and more. It hurts so much, you know that? That I love you so much, even though I know you will never love me. Why? Why can't you leave my thoughts? Why can't you just hate me? It'll make the pain a whole lot less. I love you so much, Ryouta, so fucking much. I can't even look at you without my heart screaming in pain. Why do you keep on doing this to me?"
Even as I said this, the tears wouldn't fall. And I was glad that they didn't. That's all I've been doing, crying. I probably would start crying pretty soon anyways, after he leaves. But that didn't mean it didn't hurt. Almost if not more, than the pain that I went through every day due to my tuberculosis. I wished that I could just forget about my-
"Mae-cchi?" Kise yawned, waking up. My body froze before I forced it to relax.
"Did you rest well?" I asked him.
"Yeah but I had the strangest dream," Kise said to me, rubbing his eye with his hands.
"Oh really? What was it about?" I couldn't help the curious tone that entered my voice.
"I dreamt that someone was confessing to me, but I couldn't recognize the voice. Do you know who it was?" Kise asked me. I stared at him wide eyed, too shocked to say anything. After a couple of seconds, I forced myself to smile.
"How should I know? I wasn't in your dream baka," I laughed, but it sounded fake even to my ears.
The room was silent with an awkward silence. I stared at my fingers awkwardly. "So...how's it going with Kashiwagi-san?"
"We broke up," Kise said. My eyes grew wide and my neck snapped up to look at him.
"What? But didn't she say she loved you? Why did she break up-" I asked confused.
"She didn't break up with me, I broke up with her," Kise murmured softly, his eyes never leaving me, even after I looked away.
"Why did you do that?" I mumbled, refusing to look him in the eye, "Did you fall in love with someone else?"
"Yeah, I did," Kise admitted, "And I couldn't lead Yuriko on. It would have been too cruel to do that to her."
I could feel the heartbreak all over again as I heard those words. He loved someone else. I would never have my chance would I? Not that it would matter, I am going to die soon anyways. "Really? What is she like?" I cursed at myself. I really was a masochist aren't I? That's why I keep on torturing myself.
"She is the kindest person I know. She always smiles no matter, even if she is in pain. She's selfless and always there to help someone. She is so patient, and loyal. Standing by my side throughout everything, even though I haven't been the best to her. Her eyes are the brightest viridian green, and she has beautiful chestnut brown hair. The woman I love has loved me for so long, and I have been so blind to not have seen her feelings for me." He held a strand of my hair in his hands as he said that, looking straight into my green eyes.
"Is this some kind of a joke?" I choked out. There was no way that after all this time, my feelings would be reciprocated. There was no way. Was this a dream? Was he just messing with me?
"It's not a joke," Kise said softly, "I love you, not Yuriko, not some other girl, but you."
I ducked my head as I cried softly, "But you loved Yuriko so much."
"I did like her, but I did not love her. At one point I thought I did, but after I got back with her, you would never leave my mind. Everything I did reminded me of you, and I realized how much of a fool I was. The one who I loved all along was you. I love you, Hisako."
My hand covered my mouth as I tried to stop crying. After all this time, the person who I love, loved me back.
"Hisako," Kise brushed my bangs away from my hair. "You haven't told me your reply yet."
I wiped away my tears and smiled weakly, "Baka. You should know this by now. I love you, Kise-kun."
"Ryouta," Kise told me suddenly. I looked at him in confusion. "Call me Ryouta, like you did when I was sleeping, Hisako."
I blushed but smiled lightly, "I love you Ryouta." A quiet yelp escaped my lips as he pulled me into a hug.
"You're so cute Hisako when you blush," he whispered playfully into my ear.
I could feel myself blush harder at that, "S-stop it Ryouta! It tickles!"
A smirk graced his face, "Really? Would this be better?" Before I could say something, he captured my lips with his. Instantly, my eyes closed in bliss. It wasn't a heated passionate kiss, just a gentle one. But I could still receive the feelings that he were trying to give me through the kiss. Opening my eyes, I couldn't help but to giggle at the sight of Ki- no Ryouta blushing.
"Why are you blushing? You've kissed girls before."
"You make me sound like a player Hisako," Ryouta pouted, "Besides how could I not? You looked so cute~!"
My face erupted into flames as I ducked my face into Ki-chan. "Stop saying embarrassing things."
"Hisako~!" Ryouta whined.
I looked up to see his pouty face. Shoot, how in the world can you say no to that face? Simple. You can't. "Y-yes?" I answered hesitantly. There was a mischievous sparkle in his eyes that made me wary. Nothing ever turns out good whenever he has that look in his eyes.
"Can I cuddle with you?"
"W-what?" I spluttered. I could already feel myself blushing bright red. Everytime I'm around him, I couldn't stop blushing! This guy was going to be the death of me.
"Please?" Ryouta asked me, his golden eyes staring into my green ones. How could he keep a straight face asking me that?!
"S-sure," I mumbled, embarrassment seeping out of me.
"Yay," he cheered, like a little boy on Christmas Day. Smiling softly, I scooted over so that Ryouta could lay next to me.
He quickly clambered onto the bed, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me to his chest. Closing my eyes, I snuggle closer to him. Smiling, his grip around me tightened protectively. I let out a sigh, why couldn't moments like this forever? Why did God have to be so cruel, to give me this happiness, when I know it will be ripped away from me?
"Hisako?" Ryouta asked, brushing away my hair away so he could see my face clearly, "Are you okay?"
I didn't trust my voice and nodded to reply.
"Then why are you crying?" he asked me, his voice gentle, but I could hear the concern.
I was crying? Before I could wipe them away, he leaned in and kissed away my tears.
"I guess, I'm really happy," I lied.
Kissing my forehead, he said in the most heart warming voice ever, "I love you Hisako." Tears poured out of my eyes, but this time they were happy. The dream that I had wished for so many years, the dream that I thought would never come true, became a reality.
"Hisako," Ryouta murmured into my hair, "Promise me you won't leave? Everyone else, my dad, my friends, even the other Generation of Miracles, left me. Promise you won't leave?"
"I promise," I said, looking straight at him as I said that.
"Thank you," He hugged me tighter against him. Placing my head against his chest, I could hear his steady heartbeat.
We stayed like that until visiting hours were over. In each others arms, laughing, catching up on each other's lives.
"Hisako, let's go on a date tomorrow~!" Ryouta said, sitting on the chair again. The nurse already warned us about the time.
"Tomorrow? Sure," I smiled, already excited for tomorrow.
"Good night~!" He cheered, leaning over to kiss me really quick. Though it was a little bit longer than I thought it would be.
"Night," I mumbled, pulling away from the kiss.
Kissing me on the forehead, he waved goodbye and ran out the room to avoid the nurse yelling at him for staying longer.
I stared at where he was, before sighing, and falling back on my back. Covering my eyes with my arm, I felt my stomach twist and turn uncomfortably. "I guess it's time," I smiled bitterly. The energy that I had, suddenly vanished. With the little I had left, I got up and reached for the paper and pen. Closing my eyes, I took in a sharp intake of breath as a wave of pain suddenly hit me. Gathering the little strength in me, I begin to write two letters. One for my mother, and the other for Ryouta.
Once I finished, I put them on the table next to me, where the paper cranes sat. Laying back down on the bed, I stared at the ceiling until sleep took it's toll on me.
One paper crane, two paper cranes, three paper cranes, four paper cranes, five paper cranes, six pape-
Gasping for breath, I woke with a sudden start. Choking on my own spit, I grabbed my chest in a pathetic attempt to breathe. A scream tore from my throat as I hacked violently into my hands, blood dribbling down my chin. Wildly panicking, I could hear the beeps of the heart monitor beside me grow louder and louder. HELP! I tried to scream but nothing came out. I could barely register the nurses and doctors rushing in and trying to hold me down as I wildly tried to escape from them. I could feel them inject me with something.
The effect was almost immediate. My wild movement became slower until it finally stopped. My chest didn't hurt so much anymore. My eyes started to close, as a breathing mask was placed on me. I could feel them pushing my bed to the ER, but I couldn't care about it. As my eyes started to close for the final time, a small smile played on my lips. I wish it wasn't the very last time I would closer them. I wanted to love Ryouta more, wanted to see more, wanted to live more. I love you Ryouta. Gomen, I couldn't keep my promise. The heart monitor let out a high pitched beep, before it flatlined.