I wont say anything before this one - but if you're still with me...thank you. :)
Naomi:
We were walking through the resort before I even realised that we had stepped foot outside the Villa. The only thing I could think about was what I had learned about Emily. She was at least bi-curious and at some point today she had fucked herself thinking of me. With that last admission I had almost melted, but it should have scared me, shouldn't it? The fact that another girl had thought about me in that way. In all honesty though, I was more intrigued by it than anything else and I found myself overwhelmed with the urge to ask her what exactly it is that lesbians do.
I'd spent most of the day and a good percentage of the evening telling myself that Emily wasn't interested in me, that she was just being friendly. When the whole glass incident had happened, it surprised me how being that close to her could feel that amazing, could feel so right, and I found myself just wanting to run my hands all over her. I would have kissed her, wouldn't I? To be honest I didn't have a fucking clue what I would have done and I guess the uncertainty frightened me enough to run as soon as Cook interrupted us.
"Oi Blondie...you with us!?" Cook had dragged me most of the way to the 'adults only' part of the resort, my mind was too busy running around in circles trying to figure out what the fuck had just happened to notice that he was standing about twenty meters in front of me and Emily was nowhere to be seen.
I didn't say anything when I caught up with him, but as I got closer I could see the red neon lights of what I assumed to be some semblance of night life. The copious amount of vodka running riot in my system made everything just a little fuzzy round the edges, but I was in the mood to get completely shit faced, so the sooner I got another shot down me the better. Even though the club was on site Cook had assured me that it was one of those 18-30 scenes so the atmosphere wouldn't completely suck.
"Where's Emily?" I asked without even realising that the words escaped my mouth.
"She's gone on ahead to get a booth, this club is bloody brilliant babes, hope you're ready to get completely wankered!" He took my hand and bounced off in the direction of the neon gorgeousness and the promise of a killer party. He played the perfect gentleman and paid for our entry, found Emily at a booth in the corner of the club and then disappeared to get us both another drink.
The silence was killing me, I mean if you ignored the thumping music, screaming people and the general melee of the nightclub, Emily hadn't said a word since the Villa. All that was going through my head were cheesy chat up lines and fun facts that no one gave a damn about, so in the end the silence was probably the best option. I'd never been nervous just sat with someone before, usually after a couple of drinks I was just a babbling mess.
Instead of making myself look like even more of a tit I focused on my surroundings. We were underground, partly to drown out the noise and partly because trying to grind up against other people in thirty degree heat would lead to completely unwanted chaffing. I was quite pleased to note that the average age must have been mid twenties and there were at least a hundred people or so jumping to a pretty sick beat. If I had this place to run off to every night maybe the holiday wasn't going to be as completely fucking lame as I thought.
"So...you come here often." I cringed inwardly, it was supposed to be a completely innocent question, but of course was entirely misconstrued to sound like flirtatious garbage. I wasn't the best at flirting when I was sober, let alone in my current state but Emily raised an eyebrow at me and laughed. At least I had sort of broken the tension.
"Usually girls offer to buy me a drink before starting with the shit chat up lines…" Emily winked at me and all the apprehension suddenly disappeared, we laughed together and it just felt perfect.
"Happen often does it? Girls buying you drinks…" I hadn't meant for it to sound as jealous as it had, honestly, I guess I'm just great at putting my big fucking foot in my even bigger mouth. Her brilliant smile vanished and I was left searching for a knife to cut through the tension.
"Alright girlies...lets get fucking mental!" Cook and a tray full of multi-coloured shots, Emily grabbed one and threw it down her throat without a word and I quickly followed suit. Sours, fucking horrible but easy enough to drink and it didn't take the three of us long before we'd made a pyramid of empty shot glasses. I won't lie, it was pretty damn impressive.
"Fuck, you girls can put it away! Emily, the next round's on you Red." Emily rolled her eyes and asked me what I wanted to drink, I mouthed over the music for her to surprise me...something fruity and extremely alcoholic. She smiled at me and walked away, sliding her hands into her back pockets giving me the perfect reason to watch her arse sway as she wandered over towards the bar, not that I needed an excuse. She looked fucking amazing in those little black shorts.
Cook was talking complete shit, something about his mates, beer pong and a stripper. I nodded at all the right places but my attention never left Emily, I watched her play with her hair as she placed our order, as she smoothed out the front of her top before turning back around to check we were still there, I ran my eyes over every inch of her frame at least twice and back again.
"...and then the fucking cops battered the door down." Cook finished some witty anecdote that I'd completely missed, but I looked over at him and laughed as if I had been listening intently at every word. The music had turned a lot more electric, a thick beat like the Bristol shit holes I was used to. I graced him with a few moments of my attention just to make sure it didn't look too fucking obvious that the only thing I appeared to care about was the curve of her thighs and the arch of her back. And the brunette that had her hand round her waist...what the actual fuck?
If looks could kill she would have dropped dead the instant I saw her squeezing herself as close to Emily as she could get. They were talking and even from here I could tell that Emily wasn't comfortable, she was doing everything other than physically shove the girl away, but the brunette just wasn't getting the hint.
"Oh shit...fucking stalker alert!" Cook was looking over at them too now.
"What?" I asked whilst swallowing as much emotion as possible, I didn't want him to know that the green eyed monster was about to burst out of me and turn me into the incredible fucking hulk or something.
"Mandy...Emily fucked her like once and now she just won't get the hint that it was a one time deal. Bit weird to be fair." Cook downed the remainder of his pint but didn't seem the slightest bit interested in going to Emily's rescue.
Before I knew what I was doing, I was halfway across the dancefloor ready to punch this girls lights out. The look of relief on Emily's face when she saw me coming was insane, she was practically waving a white flag in surrender. I tapped the brunette on the shoulder and waited until she turned around.
"Excuse me, but that's my girlfriend you have your hands all over… Unless you want to leave one arm short I highly recommend you remove it. Now." I told her and fought the urge to go full on bitch mode on her, but perhaps that would have been too much.
"Girlfriend?" Mandy smirked and quirked a drawn on eyebrow in my direction without removing her hand that was still rested on Emily's waist. Big fucking mistake.
"Yes, girlfriend. Do you want me to draw you a fucking diagram,?" I asked her as if she was completely brain dead, which wouldn't really surprise me. I took a threatening step forward and looked her right in the eye, "Now, remove your fucking hand or I'll do it for you."
I silently begged her not to, just so I'd have an excuse to punch her in the face and when she stupidly chose not to remove it, I almost thanked her for her complete stupidity. Unfortunately, before I had a chance to unleash the Tyson in me, Emily stepped in.
"Really, baby, she's not worth it." She said to me as she removed Mandy's hand herself and laid a reassuring hand on my chest, "Let's just get our drinks and get back to Cook, yeah?"
It seemed that I'd taken the role of the jealous girlfriend a bit too seriously when I felt myself genuinely relax a little from the calming voice and touch from my fake girlfriend. I don't know what it was about that Mandy girl, but she seriously pissed me off.
"If you say so, hun." I said and put my arm possessively around Emily without breaking eye contact with Mandy. Hell if I was gonna be the one to back down.
"I thought you said you didn't do relationships." Mandy said as she broke the eye contact to look at Emily.
I felt Emily tense up slightly again and without fully intending to, I started stroking her arm reassuringly.
"No, Mandy, I told you I didn't want a relationship with you." Emily said, pronouncing every word carefully, "There's a difference."
"Ha! And what the hell does she have that I don't?" Mandy asked, humiliating herself further. I was about to come up with a fucking brilliant comeback that she had clearly asked for when Emily beat me to it.
"Sweetie, you really don't want me to answer that, and even if I did we'd be standing here all night."
I looked down at Emily then and noticed her cheeks flush bright red as if she'd said too much. For some reason the possibility of her thinking that I was that much better than a girl like Mandy, that I'd actually be relationship material for her, had a warm feeling rush through my body and the fluttering start up again.
"I really fucking doubt that, Ems. You wait and see, you'll come running soon enough when you realise you won't be satisfied with a bitchy fake blonde." She almost spluttered and started to storm off.
"I wouldn't count on that if I were you, I satisfy her just fine every night thank you very much!" I yelled after the intolerable brunette, "Bitch."
I felt Emily's attention turn to me then and looked down to find two highly amused chocolate brown eyes and a smirk waiting for me.
"Every night, eh?"
"Oh fuck off, Fitch, will you?" I laughed, but still didn't remove my hand from her waist despite Mandy being long gone, "How about those drinks, yeah?"
I didn't remove my hand when we were ordering our drinks at the bar nor when I lead her back to the table where Cook was sitting. If I didn't know any better I'd say that Cook was insanely jealous of it too, but I didn't care as I slid in to the booth with Emily very closely behind.
After our little act at the bar it seemed like we were suddenly a lot more comfortable with each other for whatever reason. We tried letting Cook into the conversation, we really did, or I did, but it was pointless. It was like we only had ears and eyes for each other.
"Oh my God, I fucking love this song… Dance with me?" Emily exclaimed suddenly and grabbed my hand and before I had chance to inform her that I had the coordination of a baby giraffe she'd pulled me onto the dance floor. It was a slower beat than before and I recognised the melodic voice that poured out from the speakers.
I know that we are upside down, so hold your tongue and hear me out...
Emily mouthed every word and as a snare drum kicked in she started to move to the music, she had her hands above her head and it looked fucking effortless. I just stood there, gazing at her, too scared to move a muscle just in case I ended up falling arse over tit. Those deep brown eyes flashed up and met my own and she smiled, then shot me a quizzical look before taking my hand in her own and pulling me that little bit closer.
Are you gonna stay the night?
"Just let yourself go, seriously, what's the worst that could happen?" Emily shout whispered in my ear and continued to wind her body around to the lyrics as though she could physically reach out and touch the words. The tempo quickened and I felt the tension that I was holding in my entire body just disappear as I started to jump to the bass, my hand still entwined with Emily's, sharing one electronic pulse. It felt fucking incredible.
I am a fire, you're gasoline, come pour yourself all over me...
As the slow melody returned I was so close to her I could smell a mixture of her perfume and shampoo. Her hands were on my back and a fire started to rage inside me. If ever I needed proof that I was indeed into girls it was right here in this moment, Emily moving my body in time with her own, I knew that I wanted her. I ran my hand down her spine and she arched backwards, draping herself elegantly towards the floor. I caught my breath as I realised that her knee was between my legs and pushing up against me every so gently.
You kill the lights I'll draw the blinds, don't dull the sparkle in your eyes...
Emily was proper singing as we continued to move as one. I had never been much of a dancer but just feeling Emily's body twist and turn so close to mine made me react. A crescendo built, the beat dropped again and this time instead of jumping aimlessly, we danced as though our bodies had melted together. Before I knew what was happening Emily had turned herself around so her back was now pressing against my torso and had her arm draped around my neck. Without thinking I wrapped my arms around her hips as we continued to grind our bodies as close together as was physically possible.
I know that we were made to break. So what? I don't mind...
My pulse was racing, I was so wrapped up in everything about Emily Fitch that the entire world that surrounded us blurred, all I could see was red. All I could feel was her. I pressed my hand flat to her stomach and caught the tip of my finger against her bare skin. She threw her head back, still singing and my nose ended up in the nape of her neck. I gulped down the scent of her skin, I was lost completely.
The rhythm slowed again and Emily turned back to face me, our foreheads resting against each other's. Emily's eyes were fixedly shut and I was fighting to keep my heart from flying right out of my chest.
Are you gonna stay the night? Doesn't mean we're bound for life...
I felt her smile and as she lifted her head slightly I found myself to be soaring in her eyes all over again. I'd felt more alive in the past three minutes than I had in my entire fucking life. Her attention was flittering between my own gaze and my lips, her breathing as heavy as mine. I saw her move then, slowly as she brought her lips to brush against my own, soft, chaste, fucking world realigning. The kiss deepened quickly as her hand ran across the band of my shorts, stars exploded throughout my vision as her mouth passionately explored my own.
Every single emotion bolted through my head, fear, happiness, longing, trepidation, confusion, you name it I fucking felt it and as I started to go dizzy I finally remembered to breathe. I pulled away from her and instantly felt cold and alone, no one had ever made me feel anywhere close to how Emily had just by dancing with me.
Realisation hit quickly as I stood there, we would know each other for a few weeks and then go back to our own lives. In that instant I knew that I couldn't do this. It wasn't the fact that she was a girl, it was the fact that I needed her completely and utterly, but the clock was ticking for us before we had even begun. There was no way I could let her in and then have to leave her, it would almost certainly destroy me.
"Sorry… I… I can't..." I stammered and turned around and almost ran away from her.
Leaving her just standing there was painful enough...
Finding myself with a lot of time on my hands, I won't bore you with the details but if I get myself back into this story then updates may well be as regular as they used to be. By all means leave me a review if you feel like it!
Much love as always. xx