Chapter one

Disclaimer: All rights goes to Ai Yazawa, the best mangaka I've ever heard of.

Sorry for ANY mistakes, but my native language is polish, so my english isn't on high level. Anyway I'll try to make it as good as I can. But sorry for long waiting for updates. It takes me so much time to translate it from polish and I have soo much to learn for school T_T

p.s. I you read this, leave review, just to let me know that someone's reading it.

Hachi's POV

When she fell asleep on Nobu's knees not long time after she hit his cheek hard, she seemed like an angel. It healed all my heart's wounds for a while and I was staring at her as at painting. From our first meeting I thought that her beauty is unique, she's so beautiful. Especially in full light, doesn't matter if it was natural or not. Still there was depressing fact that I wanted leave her with all of this alone back then, believing that Takumi is waiting for me at home like a loving husband. Fool.

Today it transpired that my pregnancy is in danger, that's why Nana – who didn't listen to my protest – took me to our old apartment, where everything was on its place as before. But before that, she has to beg her manager, beg for allowing her to appear in room 707. He was afraid that papparazzi are still out there, which were so excited about BLAST's debut, especially for their vocalist.

Right now I'm laying down on Nana's bed and staring at the ceiling. She said that it's better if she look after me for few days, she didn't want me to do anything stupid. Birth deadline is about two weeks from now. All that stress, Nana's attacks, Takumi's irritiaton, Nobu's sadness... It has all influence on my condition and my child's life. As I said, at the apartment everything is as it was. It's so quiet, I could only hear Nana's doing something in the kitchen. She said something about making dinner, because I have to eat regular. I feel bad, because she's sacrificing for me, but I couldn't leave everything for her back then, when she needed it. I've hidden my face in the pillow for that thought. I wanted to cry for infinity, but I am too tired and I don't want Nana to see it. And I don't know what to do with Nobu. I am with Takumi, but he doesn't have time for me, he's in England "settling things". I know that I have hurt Nobu, but I can't take time back and I don't wanna play games with him. I'm not sure if I really love him or it's next illusion, love from first sight. It's like that with everyone so far. From my thoughts woke me sound of opening doors and hoarse voice of Nana.

"Maybe it's not some genius meal, but I got something for you, Hachi." Nana had tray in her hands with sandwitches and orange juice. She putted it on cabinet and sat down on bed. "Everything's okay?"

I slowly rised my head from pillow and I sat resting my head on bed's back.

"Yes, thank you Nana." I said smiling. She softly smiled back, even if she didn't feel like it. After Ren's death she drastically lose weight, she didn't even eat anything, her skin is more pale than ever and her eyes are tired. She was almost to the point of ill-health.

When I ate everything, Nana took dirty dish to the kitchen and said, that she's going to take a bath. I know she's worrying about me, so I lay down on my left side and closed my eyes. But I can't loose thoughts about Nobu and Takumi. So I'll wait till Nana lies with me.

Nana's POV

Since Ren left this world it was hard to communicate with me in every way. I'll always love him, but our relationship wasn't so good from a long time, and it caused that I'll miss him even more. I didn't have chance to talk with him honestly. My pride still didn't allow me to do many things, that's why I didn't talk to anyone till now. I feel guilty for Hachiko's pregnancy danger, partly it's because of my situation, she was stressed because of my stupid behaviour. I was aware that she was Takumi's wife and HE is on the first place, not me. But I just wanted her only for me, ONLY. Now I lost Ren and I can't lose Hachi, so I have to respect her decisions before she considers me as a lunatic and she turns away from me.

I was feeling pleasant touch of water mixed with cold edges of tub. As always I reached for my cigarettes and I heard a couple clicking of my lighter before I lit one of them. I took a long drag and I looked out the window. I guess Hachi is sleeping now in my room, I hope she's resting. Until Takumi isn't in Tokyo, I will take care of her as good as she took care of me after Ren's death. Only she unterstood, that during my last hyperventilation attack, paper bag was useless. Touch of her lips was nothing like Ren's, but even if it was different, it doesn't mean it was bad. It was soothing like ocean's waves touching the skin. Then I only remember my conversation with Nobu, the moment when I hit him and crying Hachi pulling me into her arms with all her strenght. Probably she's feeling bad with all this situation, she chose safety and money because of the baby, because Takumi took responsibility for the baby without thinking, while Nobu couldn't offer anything but his love. Hachiko is type of a person that doesn't know what she wants, but back then she knew. She was directed by good of her own child, not her love at first sight. Nobu still don't understand it. Hachi's thinking, that she loves Takumi means nothing. She always choose more comfortable love, love that is more obvious. She hurts herself and her lovers that way.

I was sitting like that for half an hour, so I finally washed myself and dressed underwear and white singlet. I got out from bathroom as quiet as I could, thinking that my roommate was asleep. In my room is dark now, I lay down on the bed and as I didn't want to wake up Hachi, I didn't cover myself up. I was laying back to her.

"Nana", I heard quiet whisper from the other side of bed "it's cold, cover yourself up, please." Her voice sounded so caring, that I rolled to face her, and as I did, I looked at her. She was swallowing back her tears, I can say that even if there's so frickin' dark in this room, she had red eyes. I felt like she slowly and gently covers me up and puts her arm on my body.

"Is everything alright, Hachi?" I asked quiet.

"Yes, as long as I'm here with you." I smiled a little. Now I needed only to try to get some sleep, good that they gave me couple free days from any interviews and meetings, so I have excuse to stay here with her and take care of her. For Satsuki's sake, because that's how she wanted call her baby.

When I woke up next morning, I felt that someone's embracing me. Of course it was Hachiko. She snuggled her head in my arm, she looked so sweet. But I guessed that she had a nightmare, that explains why she embrased me so hard. I kissed softly her forehead and carefully escaped from her arms, not waking her up. Being in kitchen I sat at the table, which I made. I reached for my cigarettes and I lit first today. The sun's rays were caressing my skin nicely, giving pleasant warm, its brilliancy illuminating the whole kitchen. I took long drag and slowly let out the poison form my lungs. Hachi is sleeping in my room, so I think it won't harm her if I smoke here. I brought out cell phone from my pocket to see if I had any new message. I had one. It was Shin, who asked about Hachiko and how's she feeling. I smiled softly and I decided to answer him after I finish smoking. Shin was acting like adult, although his young age. That's why I don't regret letting him play in our band. Even if he tried to lie about his age tho. You can't hide some things from anyone. After few minutes I stubbed out cigarette and I answered Shin, I didn't want him to worry. I'll tell him to come here in the evening, so he can see by himself, that Hachi will be allright. I will take care of that.