Operation: Pigeon Droppings

by GeezerWench

Edward was warned to stay away from Bella. When he didn't, Jacob and Embry decided to do something about it. Twilight AU. Crackfic, humor. Language (for you delicate flowers). Written for the Tricky Raven's April Fools' Advanced Drabble-Writing Challenge Week of 03/29 – 04/04/2015 (Week 13). Jacob, Embry, Quil, Bella, Charlie Swan, Edward.

5. Chapter 5: Rude Awakening

Date: 04/05/2015

Title: Rude Awakening

Pairing / Characters (for fanfiction): Charlie Swan, Bella Swan

Rating: T (language)

Genre: family

Word Count: (MUST BE 100)

Prompt: rather strange painting of a startled, jolted man in a lazy-boy recliner in front of a little TV. The weirdest part is his head is an alligator head and it's been popped off.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

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~O~ Rude Awakening ~O~

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"What the hell?" Charlie shouted as he jolted awake from his little half-snooze, flinging his Vitamin R across the room.

"Nothing, Dad!" Bella answered from upstairs. "I … I just dropped my, uh, backpack and, um, stubbed my toe."

"Dammit! Spilled my beer," Charlie grumbled. More loudly he called, "Thought I heard a bang and a scream. You okay, Bells?"

"Fine, Dad. Never better!"

"Okay, honey." He hoisted himself out of his beloved recliner to grab the empty beer can. On his way to the kitchen, he was shocked by the sight before him.

"The Mariners are down ten runs!"

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~O~ ~O~ ~O~