Chapter 4 10/11/11

Narrator's POV

Silver light emanated from the moon casting a faint shimmer over the acres of a lawn the Cullen's owned. Towards the back of the house several steps further to the right of the gazebo stood a bench swing. The shine of the moon set a glare off the blonde headed women who sat upon this bench. She sat straight up stroking the onyx colored head of her husband who rested on her lap. Emmet stared into the face of Rosalie who had not dropped her gaze in about half an hour. Concern was growing inside Emmet. As strong as he was he always felt hopeless when Rosalie shut him out. The expression was dark and although he knew his wife had minor anger issues, whatever thoughts were plaguing her now were tearing her up.

Rosalie's POV

I don't know how any of them are standing inside there, warm and fuzzy all filled with relief. Does nobody see that this is merely an extension on how long the Volturi decide that we live? We had the opportunity to destroy them and we "reached reason." I felt my teeth bare and a snarl erupt from my throat. I didn't dare look at Emmet, I needed better self-control, I shouldn't have let my emotion manifest; now Emmet will start to ask questions.
As if on cue-

"Rosie, please tell me what is wrong. We made it out of this alive today. We have our family still together and I still have you. Sure we didn't get to fight but you know that this isn't over."

He finally caught my attention; I decided to look my love in the eye. This man is my Teddy Bear…My biggest protector. He may not be as tactical or quick-witted as the other men in this house but by no means does that make him unintelligent. He would have been a wonderful father.

"Emmet I'm aware that this is far from over my love…I'm just adjusting to the information we had to take in with stride over the past few months. It's finally safe enough to think of it all."

He waited for me to continue but I wasn't quite ready to divulge to my husband why my long dead heart was aching. Emmet was not the one that I needed to talk to right now. I had heard her leave the cottage hours ago and I hadn't heard anybody follow her since. I just didn't know exactly if I wanted to speak with Bella right now. I have obviously never been more jealous of any living creature in my life. Jealousy must be stifled once again because I'm never going to feel better until I tell her the truth. I rose from the bench with Emmet quickly following me.

"Stay here."
I commanded, but he grabbed my arm and turned me on spot, I bared my teeth instinctively.

"You can put those pretty little fangs away Rose. I'm tired of almost losing you, and honestly I'm not so sure all the Volturi members started making their way back to Italy. You can go wherever you're going but I'm coming too."
He finished with that devious sexy smile. Momentarily I envisioned ripping the clothes from his body and mounting him in the back yard. Remembering my original plan I conceded to allow him to escort me, with of course the plans to punish him for this later. I grinned and walked closer toward him resting my torso against his chest. Instantaneously his lower half reassured me that my seduction needed to go no further.

"Fine, you can come with me, but I'm going to speak with Bella about some things and I'd rather you wait a few feet away to at least give the illusion that we are alone."

And with that I headed off toward my destination leaving Emmet running awkwardly behind me.


Bella's POV

I'm not sure exactly sure how long I've been standing here but I know that it only felt like minutes. Soon my children will be waking up and their father will be tending to them with adoration. I will be there and he will look at me with the same adoration and devotion, and if I'm lucky enough my children will not have grown much in their sleep.

Masen and Renesmee...Simply thinking their names is enough to swell my dried tear ducts. The love of my existence helped me create two more reasons to breathe (metaphorically speaking of course). I have everything I never knew I wanted yet somehow I can't shake this feeling of desolation. I relish in the fact that Edward cannot hear my thoughts.

I fear he would find me ungrateful if he knew how often I questioned my worthiness of this family. I had to end my grace of self-pity to react to the sound of twigs breaking and branches moving. Somebody was approaching me and fast. Reactively I crouched down and rotated toward the direction of the sound. Two scents wafted towards me, one of evergreen and cinnamon, the other water Lilly and cherries.

A figure emerged whom possessed the latter of the fragrances; Rosalie. Emmet must be standing a few yards back, for whatever reason.

"I didn't mean to startle you Bella; I hope I'm not intruding."

"No Rosalie you're not intruding, I just came out here to ….absorb."

"I can understand that…I've been absorbing myself." She ended with a chuckle.

I couldn't bring myself to reciprocate, her smile faltered. I wasn't intending to be rude but company wasn't what I had been anticipating when I ventured out here. "Is there something you needed Rosalie?" I asked plainly.

Rosalie's POV

Well am I bothering her? Bella certainly wasn't going to make it easy, and if she didn't want to then neither would I.

"What exactly is your problem Bella? Your miracle children are yards away awaiting your return with your husband, and your sitting here getting some "me time"? What the fuck is wrong with you?" she wasted no time in answering

"Rosalie you have no idea what you're talking about ok?" Bella roared my direction. "I love my family; including you, I have never stopped you from being a bitch and storming out of the room so I would suggest you stop antagonizing me unless you want to see the strength of a pissed off newborn mother."

She had me seething, how dare her. She has everything she wants and she's moping out here.
"I am not intending to piss you off newborn; I just want to know why you are out here all alone while you have so much waiting for you at home." I ended near hysterics.


Bella's POV


Finally she had hit a nerve, but she also made a point. Why was I out here by myself?

Well if I was going to be honest.

"I'm afraid that if I return to them, I put them in danger. Rosalie it's disgusting, the safest I have felt since I met Edward is right now. Knowing that all my family is safely tucked away in their homes while I am safely away from them emanating my shield around the town…..it's given me the most peace of mind in many many months. I don't know what to do…" I ended with a shriek.

I let my shield snap back and the force of it sent me to the ground Rosalie ran over to me as I started screaming. I wasn't in any pain….at least not any physical pain. I was screaming out of frustration. Emmet had emerged from the bushes and scooped me up into his arms and held me tightly.

Emmett's POV

I rushed over to my sister and my wife as quickly as I could I knew why Bella was screaming. I had seen Rosalie throw this temper tantrum many times. Lucky for Bella Rose pushed this out of her now rather than building this inside her. She needed to let it out; that was always for the best. Rosalie wrapped herself around Bella and me. She rubbed her back while I held her head to my shoulder.

"It's okay little sis let it out, let it out."
Edward should be the one consoling her but I knew it wasn't his fault. Bella didn't fill him and that's the reason she feels so alone, just like Rose…these women need to start letting us in.

"Bella when are you due?"
She finally stopped her howling and looked at me inquisitively. I laughed and answered her before she went off again.

"I'm only asking because it feels that the last time you had the chance to process anything for yourself was before the conception of the twins. You should not be made to feel bad for feeling so isolated right now."

I cast a reproachful look toward Rosie and she nodded.

"I'm sorry Bella; you have every right to take time to be alone to think about everything you have been through. I can understand feeling like the things that were out to get you are still out to get you."

I cut Rose off so that I could continue my point; now that Bella has calmed down I set her on the ground standing.

"You do have to start talking to Edward about what's on your mind though. Maybe drop your shield and let him hear it if you don't feel brave enough voice it to him sometimes."