Chapter Twelve

There was so much blood on Bella's hands that she almost dropped her phone while dialing Carlisle. He was a smart man, though; he knew that something was up when someone in the family called him instead of came to him.

"What is happening?" he asked when he picked up the phone.

Her voice was bleak. "I think I may have killed my husband," she told him.

Carlisle, along with the rest of the family, was at the cottage in a matter of seconds. When Edward was brought inside, Renesmee stayed outside. She was sick to her stomach. Bella was, too, but it would be villainous for her to nearly kill him by accident and not try to help out with his revival.

Bella stood next to Carlisle as he quickly started the blood transfusions. "Is he turning?" she asked.

"No, no," Carlisle replied. "He's lost too much blood. If we don't get enough blood into him quickly, then he'll die."

"What can I do to help?"

"Go outside with Renesmee. You've done enough."

Bella and Renesmee stood in the backyard with yards between them. Renesmee could hardly see her in the slight moonlight.

"Is he gonna be like you when he's good again?" Renesmee asked.

Bella shook her head. "No. He's not turning - he's dying."

"Did you try to kill him on purpose?" The execution of the question was very blunt.

Bella furrowed her brow. "Ness, no. I slipped up. It was a complete accident. Do you really think I'm that evil?"

"No, I just…" Renesmee crossed her arms. "I just know things have been hard for you, and I know you still don't like Dad's decision. I feel like…"

"Like what?" Bella demanded.

Renesmee's brown eyes widened. "Like it was only a matter of time before he got seriously hurt, whether it was an accident or not."

"What are you trying to say, Renesmee?"

"Mom, do you remember that one night last July, when we were talking, and I said you weren't a monster?"

"Of course I remember."

"I think you are a monster."

Carlisle didn't leave the cottage until two thirty in the morning, and he took an unconscious Edward with him. "He's going to be fine," he told Bella, "but he'll need to rest for two to three days. The stitches in his mouth are going to take some healing."

Relief swept over Bella. She closed her eyes. "Thank you so much, Carlisle."

"Of course, Bella."

And then Bella was alone in the cottage. After deep cleaning it so there were no traces of Edward's blood anywhere, she asked Renesmee, Alice, Esme, and Jasper to stay with her, but they all refused. Bella didn't even bothered asking Jacob to give her company - he was still on suicide watch.

She was just a dragon left alone in her tower; everybody wanted to avoid the flames.

I didn't do it on purpose. It was an accident. I'm not a monster.

She wished she was human just for tonight so she could sleep it all off. It was so easy to avoid reality's harshness for eight, nine, ten hours, but not awake.

It was an accident. I didn't do it on purpose. It was an accident.

Being left alone with her thoughts would drive her crazy. It was like nobody could see that, or nobody cared.

I'm not a monster.

She didn't deserve to be treated like a prisoner.

I'm not a fucking monster.

She was a monster, but she didn't deserve to be treated like one.

I'm a fucking monster.

The next two months carried on quietly for Renesmee. Every moment was dissociating; it was really difficult to tell what was real and what wasn't real, so she didn't try to think about it.

All she knew was that her parents weren't talking with or touching or seeing each other, and that her father lived in the main house. Her mother had been unofficially exiled to the cottage. Rosalie and Emmett knew of her father's last accident, and they had to be grateful that they were no longer in Forks. It wasn't human enough for them, and it was far too reckless.

Renesmee also knew that she did, in fact, want to be with Jacob, as well as try to accept his depression. The act that they'd had going on since September was too fake for her, but she still wanted to do her best. But even then, she still didn't belong anywhere. Jacob's caretaker was not her job. She didn't truly belong with a werewolf, she couldn't coexist with her human family members, and she still felt excluded from the vampires. What was she supposed to want? What was she supposed to choose?

With the weight of the world on her shoulders, she decided to take a day for herself and away from her mess of a family in December. She told her fully-recovered father that she was going to visit Rosalie and Emmett as a surprise, and then she was off to Port Townsend. Two hours wasn't far enough, but it would do.

Upon ringing the doorbell, Renesmee knew that she had made the right decision. Every time she entered her own house in Forks, it was silent. Scary silent. When she rang the doorbell at Rosalie and Emmett's house in Port Townsend, she heard the television and sounds of excitement and "Oh, who could that be?"

Emmett answered the door, and his face lit up when he saw Renesmee. He looked brand-new. (Renesmee had forgotten that he had to wear glasses since his human eyesight was so bad.)

"Rose," he called behind him. "We've got company."

Rosalie wrapped a robe around herself as she walked to the front door, and her face lit up, too. She gave Renesmee a soft, warm hug and pulled her inside. The house was pristine. Vacuum cleaner lines were in the pearly white carpet, and there wasn't a hint of dust anywhere. Rosalie was living out her housewife fantasy.

Renesmee and Rosalie sat on the sofa, and Emmett sat on the loveseat across from them. Rosalie held her niece's hands; she missed her so much.

"How are you?" Rosalie asked, her blue eyes focused on Renesmee's brown ones. "How are things back in Forks?"

"They're fine, I guess," Renesmee replied.

"How's Edward?" Emmett asked. "Did he have a speedy recovery?"

Renesmee nodded, looking at Emmett. "Yeah, he recovered really fast."

"I still feel so bad about what happened," Rosalie said.

"Don't," Renesmee said. "It's not your fault, anyway. But enough about that. How are you?"

Rosalie proudly put a hand on her fourteen weeks baby bump. "Pregnant," she said with an enormous smile on her face.

"The baby's healthy as hell," Emmett said, and Rosalie nodded.

"Do you guys have any names in mind?" Renesmee wondered.

"Evelyn if it's a girl," Rosalie said, "and Walter if it's a boy."

Two of the most popular names of the 1920s, Renesmee thought. Of course. "Do you hope it's gonna be a girl or a boy?"

"It's gonna be a boy," Emmett asserted.

"Shut up," Rosalie said playfully. "It it's a girl, you'll love her just the same."

Rosalie was so much happier now that she was human, and so was Emmett. To Renesmee, it was incredible.

The three of them ate lunch and watched two movies on television. When the credits rolled during the second film, Renesmee stood up and went to the front door to put her shoes on.

"Leaving already?" Rosalie asked.

"Yeah, I think so," Renesmee replied. "Gotta get back to the crazy parts of the family. This was nice, though. I really needed that."

"You know," Emmett said, "you can always stay with us if you need to figure some things out, or just wanna get away from everyone else."

"Thank you so much."

"I do hope you visit again before the baby is born," Rosalie told Renesmee.

"Me, too. Promise you'll visit Forks at Christmas?"

Rosalie smiled genuinely. "I promise."

Renesmee loved them - she truly did. And she wanted to get away from her Forks family more often, too, but Port Townsend just wasn't far enough. Two hours was nothing.

The second she got back into her car, she knew where she needed to go. Two hours away just didn't beat two days away.

In the cold December night, Renesmee drove hard and fast. She was off to Denali, and she couldn't see herself turning back any time soon. It was the best decision she could make.

End of Act I

A/N: We're now halfway through the story. I think I wanna finish this sometime in April. Let's roll. Also, thank you SO much for the follows, favorites, and reviews. They fuel me.

Until next time,

HS.