Rating: T

Summary: Balthazar hates himself for feeling like this, but he can't help it. Castiel loves Dean more than him.

Balthazar shouldn't be surprised by this, but it still stings.

He knows Castiel loves Dean more than him.

He could see it in those "stares" they give each other. Hell, Castiel died twice for Dean and would do anything for Dean. Castiel won't do that for him.

He decided to bury those feelings, so they won't bother Castiel and Dean. But it kept festering until it became noticeable and Castiel asked him what the matter was.

He then exploded.

He yelled at Castiel, saying he couldn't help but feel second-best to a hairless ape. That Dean wouldn't have to worry about Castiel stabbing him in the back.

He then saw Castiel step back as though he has been struck and then saw Dean, who just walked into the room, staring at him with wide eyes. He looked at Castiels face again and was horrified to see tears forming in his blue eyes. He then flew off, wanting to get away from everything.

He didn't know how long he was gone, time was relative to an angel, but he knows he was gone for at least two weeks. When he came back, dean was cooking dinner and wouldn't even look at him. The cold attitude made Balthazar cringe.

"Hello Dean." He said, watching as Dean flipped over a burger.

"Where the hell were you?" Dean growled.

"Around." Balthazar said, making Dean scoff.

"You hurt Cas." He said, "I should be mad at you, but I said some pretty shitty things to him, so I can't be all pissed at you."

Balthazar nodded and then Dean sighed.

"He loves you too, Bal." he said.

"He loves you more." Balthazar said with a curt tone. "Don't deny it. He will do anything for you. He could live without me, he can't live without you."

Deans shoulder slumped as he took a deep breath.

"I know and I can't without him." Dean said, then looking at Balthazar, "You know why you're so important to him? Because you're the only angel that gave a damn about him. Sure you betrayed him, but you did it so he won't hurt himself. None of those dicks with wings would do that for him."

Balthazar stood there as he digested the information, suddenly feeling guilty.

"Look, you need to see him. He tired himself out from looking for you." Dean said, "He's in our room."

Balthazar nodded as he walked towards their shared bedroom and walked in. he saw Castiel, still dressed, asleep on the bed. The fact he was asleep meant he was exhausted. Balthazar felt his heart break.

He reached over and sat next to Castiel, stroking his hair. Castiel moaned in his sleep and opened his eyes, widening when he saw it was Balthazar.

"I-I…Balthazar…I'm sorry." Castiel stuttered.

"Cassie, no, no."

"I…We didn't mean to leave you out."

"Oh, Castiel. The one thing you and Dean don't do is leave me out."

"B-But you said…"

"No, love, I didn't mean it. I was just…upset."

"But it's true. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Balthazar moved over and lay next to him, holding him in his arms.

"I do love you, Balthazar. I do. I also love Dean, but…"

"You love him more."

Castiel looked down in shame while Balthazar kissed his forehead.

"You know, I saw it the minute I saw the two of you together. It couldn't be more obvious." Balthazar said.

"Dean was the one who taught you to crave, to rebell. He was the whole reason you rebelled in the first place, Cassie. I won't deny the attraction."

Castiel chuckled as he stroked Balthazar's knuckles.

"You deserve more."

"No, love, I just want you and our lovely human."

Castiel gave a small smile and then snuggled into Balthazar's chest.

"Don't go, I need you." He whispered, making the older angel hold him tighter.

"I'm not going anywhere, Castiel. You'll always have little old me."

AN: Phew, this is finally done.

This is the problem with three way relationships, jealousy.

I do feel thought that Cas loves Dean more than anything, hell, dean was the whole reason Cas rebelled in the first place. Also let's admit, Balthazar only betrayed Cas because he doesn't want Cas to kill himself. So, I tried to get that angsty bit here.

Enjoy and comments are loved! I don't own SPN!