Alexandria had always been the ambitious one. Whatever she was after she would soon obtain. She was an unstoppable force. Confidence as her weapon. I being the complete opposite. Broody.
What she had told me that day, in the comfort her arms I never doubted. I only wondered how she would accomplish the task.
Jonathan's eye had already been set on me, along with the set arrangements, he never second glanced her. Funny, we were TWINS. It was really weird and that was something I could never understand. Maybe he was interested in taking a silent obedient wife. Alexandria would without a doubt not be. But still...
It hadn't occurred to me why Alexandria was so interested in him. She seemed interested in every man that would come here for the same purpose.
"He will be mine"
Yes that's what she had said, but was it a promise?
I'd have to wait and see.
The next day began like the last, I was just a little more compliant than yesterday. Alexandria stayed with me that night, but when I woke she was gone. Hardly any sleep was had that night as we stayed talking till dawn about this and that. Unimportant things. We enjoyed that time and I knew we wouldn't have time like that again. It almost made me sad.
"My lady are you feeling better today?" Emma had asked dressing me, a look of concern was plastered on her face or maybe that was just her normal face, she always looked that way. Weary.
"I'm fine" I replied, my eyes followed the patterns on the ceiling. It wasn't a lie, after the news I did feel or rather make myself sick. I was awfully upset, wait I still am. Although Alexandria had provided me little comfort and hope.
I didn't want to face them although I knew I had too since they'd probably arranged the whole day for me to spend with him. My face twisted with disgust at the thought and I threw myself back on the bed with a grunt of discontent.
"My Lady your dress will get wrinkled!" Emma called out in a panic waving her hands in front of herself. I just ignored her as usual do. I thought.
Unless Alexandria can pull through and actually do something about this mess. It's nice to believe she could part of me believes in her, the other part thinks Jonathan will reject her enough times and she will take it so hard she'll give up. She is confident, but even she has a limited tolerance. How disappointing it will be. Me someones bride. I don't even know myself sometimes. Who I am, what I want to be, what I want out of life. My life is just to be thrown away before it begins. I guess if I was a male I would have more options. Women never do. Men can't see our strengths or care about our feelings, they are only blinded by their own selfishness. Regarding their needs more important. We are only objects in the background.
With discontent I sat up, bracing myself back on my hands. My eyes trailed left to right with a look apathy. Until my eyes found Emma's. Staring at her I didn't incline to speak I just stared and thought to myself.
A maid's life, how nice that would be. At least as a second option. The first being a bird. Free to fly across every sky to hearts content. Across the endless sea, the sea would be nice.
My thoughts had trailed a little off course, I should be thinking of an excuse to stay in locked in my room all day.
BAM!
It hit me.
I sat up so fast, Emma had not expected me to sit up she almost fell back and hit the floor. That's it!
"Emma!"
"Yes my lady!?" She had just caught her balance and stared me attentively waiting for what had cause the sudden exertion.
My eyes narrowed in and my mouth formed a frown, I let myself fall back again bringing my knees to my chest closing my eyes rolling side to side every so slightly.
"I lied" I whined in the most distressing voice I could muster. "I'm actually feeling very ill" I opened one eye to look at her. I admit it did look a bit dramatic and pathetic but she was naive so she wouldn't know I was acting. It was too easy to fool her.
Her face froze...And it stayed that way. She appeared as stone, her breath ceasing. It surprised me and I was about to speak
"Liar~"
A voice echoed in my mind. The suddenness alarming, My heart skipped and my breath caught. Still, suspended. Skittering lines over my vision, light, and ripples of endless rolling. The glare from the light reflected onto... glasses?
Who is there?
Eyes of green, eyes of death.
"Help" a quivering breath was all I heard out of the silence. Is that my voice? I questioned. It seemed to me it could be, an imitation perhaps, but it was. I just didn't want to believe it was. I couldn't bare the...
What is happening?
I felt within and without myself, there I was on my bed still and there somewhere else, but grasped inside myself as these visions flooded my mind and yet I was somewhere else in those visions. The feeling soon came back to my body, but it wasn't the softness on my bed I felt.
Under me was wet, thick, warm blood along with the hard solid wood floor of somewhere. My body rested on it uncomfortably, but by far the most uncomfortable feeling was a piercing feeling in my chest right above my breast. A needle possibly, but to harsh. A knife I guessed. The pain was there yes, but not as present as it should be when a knife would be piercing your skin. I assumed, since I was not familiar with the feeling. Although it was familiar in the sense I knew it would be felt...one day. That day. My day.
Huh?
Voices, whispering amid the air as if they dangled above. It came as a flash and left as a candles fire blown out. Subtle and quickly. But I remember the moment. For I was living it. Now or then
"STOP!" I shouted in a broken gasp as I swung myself forth.
Crack.
As a crack forms onto glass, cracks filmed over my vision and for that brief moment I saw them. Two figures, shadows for they weren't sharply detailed to my eyes. There. The shadow with eyes of green death was found by my eyes first, beside me and the other...a flaring shadow as if it could of been black fire. It's glowing eyes of another world that said to me without speaking a word "Come" It was the darkness directly in front of me calling to me... silently. Our eyes connected and it made me quiver when the figure met my strained gaze. I tried to call out, but nothing. I tried to speak again, yell, demand to be heard.
"How?" a whisper came subtlety. It was a question wanting to be answered but not in that same moment.
"It seems death was denied"
My arms extended, reaching out toward the flaring shadow. I was desperate for it, but I couldn't bring myself to understand why other than the utmost fact I believed it could save me. Free me.
"Me~?" chimed the shadow.
Yes
Crack.
"My lady"
"Sophia"
"Miss"
"Sophia Volcain"
"Sis"
"You"
"Me"
"Him"
Formations and color spread across into my vision. Orange from the faded glow of a candles from the candelabra I held in my right hand as my feet carried me forward. The dimmed painting on the walls. The faded color of blue and white from the walls. The candles orange light against my white night gown could be matched by the paleness of my skin. It seemed as if I awoke walking, but I was back. Back into my moment, a moment. My home, in the halls headed toward somewhere I told myself trying to remember. But I didn't know how I hadn't know. The present moment from what I could remember.
It was a noise that caught my ear, a voice. Foreign with a familiar voice. I was at Alexandria's door. Whispers amid the night from behind her door echoed in my ears.
"Don't be shy, come closer" a male voice purred.
"Noooo" A giggle. I knew. It was her and it was him.
"Alright then" There was heard contact and rustling of the sheets more giggling and a chuckle. My ears could not lie, the fact was unutterable. They were in there together...alone.
I knelt down onto the floor and placed the candelabra down next to me. I had to see. Placing my hands softly against the door and peering one eye into the key hole I could see them. There on the Alexandria's bed. Her sitting onto him and him lying underneath her, him running his hands through her hair slowly sliding it down to her the strap of her nightgown. With a snap of the strap she giggled once more and he smiled back at her, his teeth showed. His smile was...nice, maybe even genuine. Ch what am I thinking! How could any aspect of what I was witnessing be nice, how could I even think so.
It was wrong. It couldn't be possible, how could it? I didn't need to say it let alone think it.
Alexandria what are you doing?
"He will be mine" She said. Was this what she meant. To take a man into her bed. Our parents under the same roof! Home! Here! Argh! My thoughts shouted, for I couldn't. This was mad. I, furious. But what could I do, I could not stop this. I felt I had no power let alone no reason, this is what should happen right? She promised me this to me. Shouldn't I rejoice in the thought of this weight being off my shoulders. It could be counted as wrong or right, I mean if this goes through. They will marry, no will know of this night but me. I wouldn't go telling either. It will be as though it never happened.
I smiled to myself with assurance, that I had the right to be happy. I should be happy.
Making sure there was no one around I rose, picked up the light and leaned my back against the door. In silence for I had nothing left to feel, but the lingering stab of guilt for what I was to keep forever a secret. Still waiting to feel some positive way. This was going to drive me mad. Everything was heavy on the mind.
I shook my head back and forth, In a quick and aggressive fashion. My vision blurred, but as my head swung left I caught the sight of the moonlight shinning in from a window, the outline of a figure was there. They were there again staring back at me. Those eyes.
I had stopped my head shaking, now I was still. In a trance of wonder. It brought me back to that moment I faintly recalled before this one. The remembrance of those two shadows which lingered over me. My hand had found movement and I involuntary waved at them as if I had done so many times before. My body approached the window, again a involuntary action.
Now I was before them and when I found stillness they finally stirred from there stone state.
Everything seems to be unreal and I can't grasp what is happening. The shadows were all that seemed real to me, there was one before me now. I could feel their presence, the rest was just a repetitive obvious moment I had lived day in and day out.
Crack.
A single crack formed over my right eye. I felt I was to loose this time quickly and I slammed my hand on the window in a wordless plea. Their hand had found itself over where mine hand landed. They stared into my eyes. My eyes starred back into theirs with the question on my mind.
Why won't you save me?
But I realized it wasn't them that could save me, it was the darkness.
It all came back to me at once, what was happening what I had been doing what this was. I was fighting.
I was dying and this was my life fleeting from my body. My soul recounting memories that had been in my final days. Redone so I wouldn't have ever met him. The reaper that stood in the frame of the window.