Complement

by Michele D

This is the first fanfiction I wrote. I began it in 2000 & completed it in 2002. I will mark it complete once all chapters are up. I'll be posting a few chapters at a time. Just a heads up, it is long. Starts in the future that only lives in my head (Prologue). Takes place right before & during Judgment (Part I).

33. XXXI - Promises - Part 2

Author's Notes: Any mythic beings in this story are strictly the product of my imagination and not to be taken literally. There was no intent to defame or disparage any of your beliefs. They were strictly used in this way for fun and to help move the story along. The poem Promises © Michele 12/00. Both songs used in this Chapter are by Lifehouse. This chapter is in 2 parts.

XXXI - Promises

Part 2

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Dawn clung tightly to Buffy, she sobbed from the depths of her soul as it all crashed down around her ears. The guilt, the anger and the shame she felt at what she had done today made her stomach twist into knots and her soul screech at her in horror. She started to cry even harder when she thought of the betrayed, pain-filled, hurt look in Faith's eyes, then even harder when she realized that today she might have destroyed the precious, special bond that she had always shared with Faith.

The memories the monks had given her of Faith were all good, fun, loving ones. None of her memories of Faith were of the bad, the wrong, the evil she had done. She had only learned of those things by eavesdropping and then from her Mom when she had questioned her about them only a few months before she had died. There had to be a reason for that and though she wanted to deny it, she knew the Monks did it because even they knew that Faith, no matter how over to the dark side she may have gone, would never have hurt her. She wondered if maybe the Monks also had done it to give the Dark Slayer at least some good, loving memories of her own as well.

She started to tremble when she realized that she had done to Faith what almost every other person in Faith's life had done to her. She had taken out her rage, her anger, her hate, her guilt, her fears, her pain with words and fists on Faith. And Faith had let her and had taken all of Dawn's sins upon her own world-weary, already overburdened shoulders. Dawn could only wonder if this time Faith could carry the weight of them and she didn't think Faith deserved this nor did she want Faith to. As the enormity of what she did finally crashed into her, she twisted out of Buffy's arms and ran for the bathroom to get sick.

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Buffy watched as her sister raced for the bathroom. Less than a second later, she heard Dawn get sick. Buffy's own stomach twisted into knots and she felt the bile rise up in the back of her throat. Her mind was a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. She was ashamed of her own part in all of this; she felt compassion for her sister who both she and Faith had left alone to deal with all of this on her own. On the other hand, she wanted to beat the living shit out of Dawn for what she had done to Faith, her mate, today. But her rage, her overwhelming need to physically hurt someone for all that had happened to both her and Faith and was still happening, was directed at two, no three people, a half demon, half human man, a deranged evil goddess and a sadistic human-mother, who were forever out of her reach. It was a rage, a fire, that could never be put out or quenched and Buffy was at a loss as to how to control it or rid herself of it.

How the hell had things gotten so fucked up again? What happened? How had this happened? How could she ever fix this? As she waited for her sister to come out of the bathroom she let her thoughts drift back to the time between when they had returned from LA and Faith had left to go find out what happened to the LA crew when they seemingly vanished off the face of the earth. Her relationship with Faith had gradually been growing stronger, they had been slowly healing and forgiving each other for the multitude of sins they had both committed against each other. Not only she and Faith, but Dawn, Willow, Tara, Anya, Giles, and even Xander and Spike had spent time together getting to know who the real people were under the facades they all wore.

She had spent more time with her sister during that period than she had their whole lives and it was all due to Faith, who wanted to and had encouraged her to include her younger sister in what they did. They, she and Faith, had become more than just Dawn's sisters, or substitute parents, they had all become friends. The three of them had become each other's true family and the rest of the Scooby Gang had been drawn slowly but surely into that family circle. They all had been happy then, it was one of the few times in her life that Buffy could say she had been truly deep down inside happy. The world then had been filled with such wonder, beauty, awe and joy. She had learned to see it again with the eyes of a child. That gift had been taught, given to her by not only her young sister, who had lost so much the past year and had learned so much about the real evils in the world, both mundane and supernatural. But by the woman who owned her heart and soul as well, Faith, for whom life had never given anything but pain, betrayal, and hurt to. Each of them had an innocence within them that even the evils of the world had been unable to corrupt.

When they had escaped from the hell they had been held captive in for seven months everything, including them, had changed. She had been determined to shield her young sister from all that had happened to both she and Faith. She didn't want Dawn to know the extent of what had been truly done to her, but mostly what had been done to Faith. She had known that Dawn blamed herself for what had happened to them and she hadn't wanted to add to that guilt. It had been up to her when they returned to look to Dawn's needs, both physical and emotional. Faith certainly hadn't been in any condition to do it, she had been barely surviving herself. She had been thinking to spare her sister the knowledge, the pain that came along with knowing all that had happened, confident in her ability to dissuade her sister of her guilt without telling the total truth and she had failed miserably, and once again, Faith had taken the brunt, the pain from her mistake.

As she sat and waited for Dawn to come out of the bathroom, Buffy finally realized that all her actions, her silence had done was to isolate her sister and add to her guilt. Instead of growing stronger, closer as a family during a time of crisis as she and Faith had during their captivity, she had succeeded in just distancing not only herself, but Faith as well, from Dawn. Slowly over time, it had torn them all apart until both she and Faith became nothing more than polite strangers to Dawn. And her young sister could only have assumed, as Buffy now knew she had, that she and Faith both placed the blame for what had happened to them on Dawn's young shoulders. They, she had left Dawn alone and frightened, left her to hear without explanation, Faith and herself in those first few weeks crying out in anguish and terror as the nightmares tore both of them apart as they slept. She knew the nightmare that Faith had the day of the BBQ had been the catalyst that had brought about what happened today.

She looked up as she heard her sister exit the bathroom. She returned the tentative, weak smile Dawn gave her. Dawn's face was blotched from crying, eyes red-rimmed and full of regret, guilt and sorrow and Buffy could see with her Slayer sight that Dawn was trying to control the trembling of her limbs. She got up from the bed and slowly approached Dawn. She made it halfway across the room before she just opened her arms up to her younger sister, who in turn hurdled herself into them with the impact of eighteen-wheeler. A soft 'oof' forced its way out of Buffy's mouth.

"I'm sorry... so sorry Buffy... for everything... I'm sorry." Dawn gasped out between the tears that started to fall again.

"I know you are Dawnie. I'm sorry too." Buffy carefully extracted herself from her sister; she held her gently by her arms and waited for the tears to stop. "We need to talk about this. Are you ready to talk about it?"

Dawn looked into her sister's eyes expecting the worst, but all she saw was sorrow, guilt, compassion and love. She silently nodded yes to Buffy. They made their way together into the kitchen, Buffy motioned for Dawn to sit down, she grabbed a can of soda out of the fridge for Dawn and then set about making a pot of coffee. Neither said a word as they waited for the coffee to brew. After what felt like an eternity to both of them, Buffy finally sat down opposite Dawn, cupping the steaming cup of coffee, she stared into it as if it held all the answers she was seeking. She finally raised her head and her eyes back up to Dawn.

"I'm not really sure where to start or even how to start. I know some of this is my fault and I know this goes back even to before... to when Mom died..." Buffy hesitated not sure where or how to go from there.

"Do you hate me?" Dawn could barely get the words out; they were just slightly above a whisper. The thought that her sister could hate her, or that Faith hated her now, after what she had done, terrified her. She would do anything to take back what she said.

"No Dawn. I could never hate you no matter what. You're my sister. I love you. Not just because you're my sister but because you're my friend as well and I guess lately I haven't been doing too well in either department at least not where you're concerned. Do you hate me? Do you hate Faith?" She held her breath waiting for Dawn to answer her. Just like Dawn, the thought that her sister hated her or even Faith for that matter, terrified her.

"No!" Dawn barely whispered out, then more forcefully she said it again, "NO! I could never hate you, hate Faith, not after what you did, what she did for me. Never..."

"Then why? Can you tell me what happened today?"

Dawn sat completely still trying to put some kind of order to her thoughts, order to all that she was feeling and she wasn't sure if she could, she opened and closed her mouth but nothing wanted to come out.

Buffy watched as Dawn struggled, she knew how she felt, when nothing seemed to make sense. Not what you were feeling, not your actions, when your mouth took on a life of its own and spouted out things your heart and soul knew were wrong. When the world seemed to be spinning around you in fast forward and you were standing still.

"I know how you feel Dawnie. Just start wherever you feel comfortable. Okay?"

"Okay," Dawn smiled at her sister, feeling for the first time since Buffy and Faith had gotten back from Glory's hell that her sister was actually here with her. At first, she was hesitant to tell her all that she felt, starting way back when their Mom had first gotten sick, then the words just started pouring out of her and she couldn't have stopped them even had she wanted to.

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Buffy didn't say anything for long minutes after Dawn finished. She wanted to kick the shit out of herself for being so blind to what her sister had been and still was feeling. She shook her head slightly, beating herself up over the past wasn't going to help anything, the goal was to take steps to change what was happening now and to make sure that it didn't happen again. And the first step she needed to take was to be honest with her sister. To stop treating her like a two-year-old and start treating her like the young adult, sister and friend that she actually was. She focused her eyes on Dawn again and gave her a small smile.

"I didn't know Dawn. I'm ashamed to say that I didn't know that you were feeling this way. I was too caught up in what I was feeling to notice what you were going through. I wish I could change it, but I know I can't. I can only hope that you can forgive me. This isn't all your fault and it isn't all mine. We both made mistakes and I can only hope that we will learn from it and not make the same mistakes again. I wasn't trying to push you away, not really. I was trying to protect you and if I am honest I was trying to protect myself as well..."

Buffy stopped for a few seconds. Dawn smiled at her, nodded her head encouraging Buffy to continue. Buffy couldn't help wonder when her sister had grown up. She started to talk again, slowly at first and just like Dawn, the words started to pour out and she couldn't have stopped them even if she wanted to. She started even further back than Dawn did, trying as best as she could to explain, but not excuse what she did. Letting Dawn know that what she had done was out of love and determination to make sure that Dawn had the growing up experiences that she never could have after she had been called and became the Slayer.

She wanted for Dawn that which she never had after she had been called and she didn't want the fact that she, that she and Faith were Slayers to interfere with that. She wanted her sister to have a normal life, something until now Buffy had always thought she couldn't even come close to for herself. As she spoke, she weaved in not only her own feelings but Faith's too. She explained to her sister the bond they shared, the ability they had to feel the other's thoughts and emotions. So not only did she explain what she had wanted for Dawn, but what Faith both felt for and wanted for Dawn as well.

Two things became very clear to Dawn while Buffy talked. Buffy had not sacrificed herself out of some twisted sense of honor, or noble duty as the Slayer. She had sacrificed herself because it was inconceivable to her to sacrifice her sister, for any reason, especially not when she could do something about it. Both she and Faith, all of them had done everything possible to make sure that no one had to die that night on the tower. When push came to shove and there wasn't any choice, Buffy did the only thing she could do, the only thing her heart would let her do, she gave her life for her sister's and Dawn knew that Faith would have made the very same sacrifice for her. It was who Buffy was, who both she and Faith were, they could no more change that then they could change their fingerprints.

The Monks may have created her. She might not be really real, or born in the sense that Buffy and everyone else in Dawn's life had been. Except for that one time when Buffy had thought that someone or something had cast a spell on their Mom to make her ill, not once, not ever had Buffy ever thought of her as other than real, as other than her sister and even more than a sister. To Buffy, and Dawn knew in her heart this held true for Faith as well, Dawn had always been real, always been her sister and this time when the tears fell, they were tears of joy. For the first time in her life, Dawn felt truly, wholly real.

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Buffy finally stopped talking when she came to what happened to both she and Faith after they went through the portal. It wasn't that she didn't want to tell Dawn about what happened. Well, in part it was. With all she was, she wanted to protect her sister from ever having to know what had happened to her and Faith in Glory's Hell. Neither Slayer had ever actually told anyone all or even a little of what had happened to them there. They had talked to each other about it and while the others could put some of it together on their own, they never had gone into any detail beyond what was necessary when they did have to talk about it.

She wasn't sure if she was strong enough to tell this alone, without Faith's support. Nor did she feel comfortable with the idea of telling what had happened to Faith there without Faith's consent. She knew she had to tell Dawn some of it. She couldn't just brush it off, the aftereffects and what had happened to both she and Faith there had affected Dawn as well. She needed to talk to Faith first before she went into this with Dawn and her instinct was telling her that this was something she should do with Faith present. She had to say something though; she didn't want Dawn to think that she was holding back, or distancing herself again. But those weren't the only reasons, no matter how hard she tried Buffy couldn't stop the words Dawn had yelled at her this afternoon from running riot through her mind.

"Dawn? Are you okay?" Buffy asked her, her voice full of concern.

"Yes and no. Thank you for telling me all this. This is the first time in a really long time that I feel like you are really here. You know what I mean?" Dawn spoke almost shyly, hesitantly.

She had expected her sister to rail at her, rant, yell. But Buffy had done none of those things. Instead, she had opened up to Dawn and told her everything, treating her as an adult and had shared her own insecurities and fears with her as well as Faith's. For the first time Dawn had a true appreciation of what it was like to be a Slayer, the pressure, the guilt, the weight of the responsibilities that lay on both her sister and Faith's shoulders. Their Mom dying had added new responsibilities, insecurities and pressures to Buffy's already overburdened shoulders. And Faith, when Buffy had finally come to her senses and realized what it was that she felt for the Dark Slayer, had done everything within her power to help Buffy shoulder that extra weight.

Dawn knew that Faith was the one responsible for bringing Buffy back into the game so to speak, she was the one that had made Buffy realize what she was doing by distancing herself from not only Dawn, but their family of friends and the world in general. Over the months, Faith had become the glue that held the three of them together as a family. Never having a real one herself, Faith had in essence taught not only Buffy, but Dawn as well, what a family should be, could be. And, before that night on the tower, they all had been making great strides towards becoming just that.

She took a deep breath when she saw Buffy was getting ready to start talking again. There was only one thing left to talk about now. Glory's Hell and the aftereffects of what had happened there, the source of almost all of Dawn's guilt, anger and fears.

"Dawn... I guess there is only one thing left to talk about now." Buffy paused and looked at her sister. She could see the emotions flashing across her face and knew Dawn understood what she meant. She smiled again at her in reassurance. Not sure if the reassuring smile was more for herself or more for Dawn, most likely it was for both of them. She was fighting against the need to shelter Dawn from this, but she knew she couldn't any longer, but she had no real intention of telling her anything until Faith was beside her and Dawn would just have to understand that for now.

"Dawn..." she began again, "I'm not going to tell you what happened to Faith and I after we went through the portal. At least not right now. It's not a pretty story and there were things that happened there that only happened to Faith and I... Well, I think it should be her decision to tell you about it if she wants. And I would like her, no... actually, I need her here with me when we start to talk about this. I think the three of us all need to be together at least at first.

"...We, Faith and I are still learning to deal with all that happened. Still healing from it and probably will be for a long time. And until today when Faith pointed it out to me, I don't think I realized that this had affected you too, differently than us, but no less than us. We, neither of us meant to push you aside, we only sought to shield you, protect you from what happened. Or, rather I did, because Faith, at least up until a few weeks ago, here within this domain, wasn't capable of talking about any of it. Not even with me.

"...I want, need you to understand, neither of us blame you in any way for what happened to us there. Remember that and believe it. It took both of us a while to stop blaming ourselves for what happened there, and I'll be honest, every once in a while it sneaks back up on both of us, the guilt that is, and I imagine that it will for a long time to come. But I know, and Faith knows that neither one of us is to blame for what happened there, nor did either of us ever, not while we were there and not now, ever, once blame you for what happened. You need to stop blaming yourself in order to start healing, in order for all of us to heal from what happened. If you want to blame someone than blame the ones that were responsible for what happened there. Blame Glory and Johnny. The blame falls totally and squarely on their depraved shoulders and no one else's."

Buffy paused for a second trying to compose herself. All the emotions those two names caused in her rose up inside of her threatening to overwhelm her. Two emotions more profound, more powerful than all the others battled with each other, absolute blinding white-hot rage and mind-numbing fear. They were holding her within their grasping hands then she felt an almost shadow-like touch of a hand running soothingly down from the top of her head to run phantom-like down the side of her face to rest gently on her cheek. The ghost of a thumb brushing along her cheekbone, comforting and calming her and she leaned into that elusive imaginary touch; and knew that it was Faith projecting the image, the emotions to her through their bond. Knew that Faith had felt what was happening solely through the Soul-Thread that bound them together for all eternity. The connection that even death couldn't sever.

She silently thanked Faith and felt an answer that was just simply love from her mate. Then the ghost touch was gone and silence reined again, as it had since she and Dawn had returned to cottage. Faith had blocked Buffy from her own internal turmoil over what happened. And Buffy had respected that block and had not tried to force her way through it or plead through their bond from her side for Faith to drop the blocks. She knew Faith was doing it so that she wouldn't be distracted from working through this with Dawn and because both she and Faith were trying to work through their own conflicting emotions over what had happened today.

Once more feeling under control Buffy locked her gaze with her sister. There was a few things she did want to say before the three of them sat down together to talk and she knew that Faith would stop her from saying them so she was going to say them now.

Dawn watched as Buffy's eyes grew hard and she felt a little bit of fear creep through her. She knew who she was looking at now, it wasn't her sister, it wasn't the Slayer and it wasn't Buffy. It was Faith's soul-mate and she braced herself for whatever was to come, because she knew she deserved it.

"Dawn..." Buffy kept her eye's locked with Dawn's, she wanted to make sure she had Dawn's complete attention before she continued. "I almost seriously hurt you today. I... Faith and I... both of us, we've become... While we were in that Hell, became almost feral about protecting each other. If it wasn't for Faith today I would have hurt you physically, Dawn. I wasn't seeing you, my sister that I love. All I was seeing was that Faith was being hurt, it didn't matter that it wasn't physical hurt. All I knew was that Faith was being hurt and that you were the one hurting her. And I wanted to make you hurt in return. I'd like to think I could have stopped myself before that happened but I'm not sure I could have and I know I would have never been able to forgive or live with myself if I had hurt you today. I know, had you done something like this a few weeks ago, I probably would have ripped you limb from limb and not even Faith could have stopped me. I'm not saying this to frighten you, I think I'm telling you more to frighten myself." Buffy paused to let what she said sink in. After a minute, Dawn nodded to her to continue, she knew Buffy wasn't finished.

"I know you didn't mean what you said today. But what you said hurt Faith, hurt her a lot. Your words hurt me too and they reminded me of my own failure. My failure at being unable to protect Faith when we were being held captive, they reminded me that no one has ever protected her ever, not even when she was li..." Buffy trailed off, it wasn't for her to tell Dawn about that part of Faith's life, that was for Faith to decide. She continued in an even softer voice almost as if she were talking to herself and not Dawn.

"...I was unable to protect her at all when we were there, while she practically... No, not practically, she did. She sacrificed herself to protect me. It's a debt I can never repay. Ever. Faith figured out the second day that we were there what it was that Glory fed on, thrived on. She fed on our fears, she could read what your greatest fears were just by touching you and then she made them a reality. And Faith, she knew that and after that first day Faith's greatest fear changed, and her greatest fear became that Glory, that he would do to me what had until our second day there been Faith's greatest fear for herself...

"...And somehow... I... I don't know how, she managed to keep that from Glory. And through sheer strength of will, managed to manipulate both Glory and him to divert almost all of their attention onto her. Dawn, if it wasn't for Faith, what happened to me there would have been a thousand times worse. And I don't know if I could have survived it. I owe her my life Dawn. I don't know what she is going to tell you and what she isn't but don't push her. No matter what she does or doesn't tell you I want you to know this. She did everything, in every sense of the word, including literally, within her power to protect me and beyond. I would have given my life to protect her Dawnie and she would have given hers for me as well. Dying would have been easy compared to what she did give in order to protect me. We both have scars from this, the type of scars that you can't see, the kind of scars that you carry with you for the rest of your life. But the scars I carry aren't nearly as deep as they would have been if it wasn't for Faith. I... I..."

There was nothing left that she could say, some of this she had never even said to Faith and the bitter taste of her failure to protect Faith rose up strong in the back of her throat. This was something she knew would haunt her for the rest of her days. Tears slipped unknowingly from her eyes as she thought of the sacrifices that Faith had made for her and she let herself cry for Faith and for herself. Feeling with each tear that fell the weight of this ghost that haunted her begin to lighten its hold on her soul. She felt Dawn's arms come around her, holding her tightly and she sobbed into her younger sister's shirt and then she felt the touch of her soul-mate within her again.

And she found that with the touch of the two people that meant the most to her in the world, one whose arms were holding her now and the other who could touch her very soul through the thread that bound their souls, Buffy felt the familiar, welcomed warmth that was simply home.

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They had been sitting across from each other at the kitchen table for about half an hour in comfortable silence when they heard the front door open and softly close. They both knew it was Faith, together they rose from the table. Buffy looked up at the clock over the sink and was surprised to see that they had talked into the wee hours of the morning. She looked back at Dawn and motioned for her to sit back down.

The sisters locked eyes; they both knew that this wasn't going to be easy. Dawn knew without being told how much she had hurt Faith, knew that Faith was not only hurt, but angry as well. Neither sister knew how Faith was going to react when she came face to face with the youngest of them again. Dawn sat back down and nodded at Buffy even though she wanted to just run out there and beg Faith to forgive her. Buffy gave Dawn a small smile, rolled her shoulders then walked out of the kitchen through the swinging door.

She walked up quietly to Faith who was standing by the dresser, peering into the open drawer. She circled her arms around Faith's waist from behind and went up onto her tippy-toes to plant a light kiss on the side of her neck.

"Hey..." She whispered softly into Faith's ear. She felt Faith's hands lay gently over the tops of her own.

"Hey..." Faith's voice was low and scratchy from the suppressed hurt she was holding in and all the battle yells she had shouted while she was sparring with the Immortals.

"Are you okay, baby?" Buffy moved to the side, her arms still around Faith's waist so she could see her face.

"Yeah," Faith answered Buffy without looking at her. She kept on rummaging around in the drawer. She pulled out a couple of pairs of sweats and a few t-shirts.

One word answers Buffy knew, wasn't good and by the look on Faith's face she knew that she was far from okay. She dropped her hands from around Faith's waist and leaned against the dresser silently watching as Faith pulled clothes from the drawers and piled them on top of it.

"Looking for something in particular?"

Faith stopped scrounging through the drawers and turned to face Buffy. Her face was impassive; her eyes were shuttered and showed nothing of her inner turmoil. She opened and closed her mouth a few times but nothing came out, she shrugged her shoulders then looked back down into the drawer.

"I ah... I'm gonna..." She started mumbling into the drawer, then found some inner strength and turned her face back up to Buffy's. "I'm gonna go stay with Mars."

"Why?" Buffy asked quietly and calmly not betraying the fear and panic that streaked through her at Faith's words.

"I think its best." Faith's eyes dropped to the floor when she answered Buffy.

"Why?" Buffy asked quietly again, her heart was racing a million miles an hour and she felt her skin turning cold and clammy.

"Because, I do." Faith looked quickly at Buffy and then started pulling clothes out of the drawers again.

"What the hell kind of answer is that, Faith?" Buffy's voice rose a little in volume and anger, mixed with panic, seeped into her tone.

Faith stilled her hands, looked at Buffy again and just shrugged her shoulders, then dropped her head, eyes back to the floor again, which only made Buffy's panic and fear escalate, she could feel tears gathering in her eyes. She felt like she was looking at a stranger wearing her mate's face and that scared her even more.

"Faith... are you... Are you leaving me?" Buffy choked out the words, they were laced with fear, she was twisting her hands, her body trembling at just the thought of Faith leaving her, of not being here with her. Here where she belonged, with her.

Faith's head shot up, she stared at Buffy wide-eyed, her mouth dropped open in shock. Where the hell did Buffy get that idea? She grasped both of Buffy's frantically twisting hands with hers, unconsciously dropping the blocks she put up to stop her own turmoil over what had happened today from seeping to Buffy through their bond.

"B... I woul..." Faith never got to finish as Dawn came tearing out of the kitchen.

Dawn had been unable to just sit at the kitchen table and wait. She had gotten up, walked over to the door, and slightly opened it so she could hear what her sister and Faith were saying. She knew she shouldn't be eavesdropping on them but she did it anyway. She was terrified that Faith would tell Buffy that she hated her, not once though did she ever think that Faith would leave Buffy because of today. They couldn't survive without each other, even she knew that. When she heard Buffy ask Faith if she was leaving her, she thought her heart was going to explode in her chest. She waited, holding her breath for Faith to answer, when she didn't immediately say no, she burst through the door in full blown panic mode.

"I'msorryI'msorrypleasedon'tleave!PleaseFaith!"

Neither Slayer had a chance to react as Dawn rushed through the door. Tears were streaming down her face, her words frantic, begging and slurred together. She practically threw herself at them both, wrapping her arms tightly around both of their waists.

"Please!Ididn'tmeananyofit!I'msorry!I'msorry!Pleasedon'tleaveFaith!" Somehow, Dawn would never know how, she managed to compose herself. She released her sister, and Faith who was her sister too, if not by blood, then by reasons of the heart. She calmed herself and stepped back away from them. She looked up at Buffy first, then at Faith, she couldn't read either of their expressions and neither of them made a move to say anything to her.

"Please don't leave. Buffy needs you, she couldn't handle it if you left. You're her whole world. Please don't do this to her because of me, because I'm... 'Cause I took everything out on you. I know none of it was your fault. I didn't mean any of it. I don't even understand why I said those hurtful things. It was like... like I couldn't stop them, like it wasn't even me. And I... I know that's no excuse and I know you can't forgive me. But don't leave Buffy because of what I did. It would destroy her. I'm sorry. I really am. I would do anything to take it all back. Anything... I'll leave. I'll go wherever you want me to. I'll do whatever you want... I just hope someday that you won't... won't h..a..te me..." Dawn stumbled over the last few words and waited for what seemed like eternity for one of them to say something, anything, yell, scream. Waited, even if it was only for Faith to tell her she hated her. Anything was better than the silence that was hollow and empty, just like her life would be without Buffy and Faith in it. They were her world; she just wished she had realized it sooner.

Buffy had untangled her hands from Faith's when Dawn let them go. She stepped back a little and listened as her sister rushed out her plea for Faith not to leave. Once Faith had dropped all her blocks Buffy had known in an instant that Faith wasn't leaving her, leaving them, not for good, she just needed a little time to distance herself and to calm the war raging in her head. She was leaving because she was afraid. Afraid that she wouldn't be able to control her dark side, which had regained a foothold inside of her again, thanks to their forced stay in Slayer Hell. So, Buffy made the conscious choice to step aside, this was something that Faith needed to decide on her own.

While Faith might not trust herself to control her dark side from lashing out at Dawn, or anyone for that matter in blind rage, either physically or verbally, possibly both, Buffy had absolute, well, faith, that the Dark Slayer did indeed have total control of her dark side. Buffy would bet her life on it. She trusted Faith implicitly. The funny thing was, while she believed Faith could control the rage that had created her dark side, Buffy was uncertain that she could contain her own rage that had created a dark side within herself.

It wasn't Faith that she didn't trust, it was herself. Her first reaction to what had happened today was just another indication that what Buffy had suspected about herself since their return was true. The rage, the fury, even the fear and the pain from what had happened to not just her, but Faith as well while they were held captive had given life to her own dark side. She had a very real understanding now of what had driven Faith all those years. And after feeling and seeing the images that came from Faith of what her life had been like, she could understand how Faith could have succumb to the Mayor and her dark side. Buffy felt that same pull herself now, to just give in to her baser urges and fuck the consequences and anyone who might get hurt in the process.

The need to lash out and hurt someone, anyone, to release the rage, to protect not just herself, but Faith as well, almost overwhelmed her at times. She suspected that Mars was aware of it, as well as Faith, Lilith and Clotho, and that was why when the training got to a certain intensity level, she and Faith did not train with the Immortals together in the same room. She knew she needed to learn how to control it now before it controlled her, before she crossed that line. And now as this became clear to her, as she felt Faith struggling mentally, she understood that they, Faith and the Immortals had been waiting for her to take the first step and ask for their help in learning how to control her dark side's rage. With that knowledge a certain calm came over her and it only helped to reinforce her trust in Faith.

So, she watched her sister and her mate, understanding in seconds as her own thoughts flashed through her mind, that this was a war that Faith needed to win herself. The decision to stay or go was one that Faith needed to make on her own without any outside influence or coercion from her, for better or worse. She hoped, prayed, that Faith would make the right decision, which was to stay. She hoped that Faith would trust in herself, because she was afraid that if Faith did walk away, even for just a few days, she would never learn to trust in herself, in her ability to control the dark side of her personality again. And if that happened, Buffy's instinct told her, the doubting of her own self and her control of her dark side would stay with Faith for the rest of her life.

Faith hadn't moved a millimeter since Dawn had crashed through the kitchen door. She was frozen like she had been earlier today. Afraid if she moved she would lose control of her dark side. It was why she wanted to stay at Mars', not here at the cottage with Dawn. If something like this had happened before they had been held captive in hell, she wouldn't have felt the need to get away. Before Glory and Johnny, she had been confident that she controlled those dark impulses. Now though, there was all this new rage inside of her and she was terrified that she couldn't control the impulse to lash out, either with her fists or words. What Dawn had said to her and to Buffy today had hurt her in a way that she had thought, until now, only Buffy, of any of the people she loved, had the power to hurt her.

On one level, she understood where it had come from, understood why Dawn had done what she did, it had been like looking at a reflection of herself. She knew the creed very well; hurt them, before they can hurt you. But that little tiny dark voice in her head whispered to her to fuck understanding why and just hurt Dawn back like Dawn had hurt her. And no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get it to shut the hell up.

So, she didn't move, not when Dawn had wrapped her arms around both her and Buffy. Not when Dawn had released them and backed away. Not when Buffy had let go of her hands and moved away as well. Not a muscle did she move, her jaw was clenched tightly to keep any words from slipping out unbidden from her mouth. Her eyes locked with Dawn's as Dawn pleaded with her not to leave. She watched almost impassively as Dawn backed away even further. Watched as Dawn's whole body slumped in defeat, saw the pain that was so clear in Dawn's eyes when neither she or Buffy said anything as she walked towards the door.

Dawn walked slowly towards the door, peeking back over her shoulder as she walked, to look at the Slayers. She could barely lift her feet, she forced herself not to collapse right there. Talking to herself in her head, trying to convince herself that in a few days' things would calm down and they could all work it out. Things would be all right between all of them. She felt more alone right now than when she thought both Buffy and Faith were dead. She finally reached the door after a few eternities. With her hand on the knob, she paused, turned one last time and locked her eyes with Faith's.

"I... I really am sorry Faith. I... I wish..." She couldn't finish, she turned back towards the door, her head dropping down to her chest and started to turn the knob.

The loneliness Faith saw in Dawn's eyes when she turned around at the door, broke Faith's heart. She knew that look too; she had seen it staring back at her from her own reflection in the mirror for nineteen years. She had a moment of clarity then. This would be the moment to lash out, this was the moment that Dawn was the most vulnerable, this was the moment that she could cause Dawn the most pain, this would be the moment her dark side would strike to cause the most damage. Yes, this would be the moment to strike if her dark side was in control, but it wasn't.

It was still there yes, would always be there, but it no longer owned her and at no point today had it ever controlled her. Her actions today had been a knee jerk reaction; she had made an assumption about herself. She had doubted herself, she had not trusted herself and it slowly dawned on her that Buffy, standing so quietly and not interfering at all, trusted her completely. She turned her head to look at Buffy and saw the ghost of a smile on her face and knew she was right.

She had been, was being tested today. It would have, could be so easy after all that had happened to both she and Buffy over the past few months, to just give up, give in and let the darkness, her insecurities and fears take control of her again. If she let Dawn walk out the door right now, she would fail that test, her silence spoke just as loudly as any hurtful words ever could. But she wasn't about to fail this test, it was too important. Dawn was too important, she was her family after all.

"Dawn... wait." Faith's voice trembled a little. She was scared now that she might have waited too long to do something.

Dawn turned back around, her eyes firmly focused on the floor, she pushed down the leap of joy at Faith's voice. She didn't look up to see which of the Slayer's were approaching her as she heard the soft footsteps coming towards her. She saw a pair of black Docs and knew it was Faith that was standing in front of her. As she gazed at Faith's Docs she realized they were the same pair that Faith had three years ago. She knew she was right because of the puncture marks on the toe of the left shoe; some idiot vampire had made them when he tried to bite her foot. A hysterical little giggle almost escaped her at how inane her train of thought was given the circumstances.

"You were wrong, you know," Faith told Dawn softly. She waited for Dawn to look up at her, when she didn't she gently placed her fingers under Dawn's chin and raised her head.

Dawn still kept her eyes lowered after Faith raised her head up. She was afraid to look into Faith's eyes, afraid of what she might see in them. Afraid that Faith hated her.

"Dawn, please look at me." She waited patiently again for Dawn to raise her eyes up to hers. She saw surprise and a little bit of confusion in them when she finally did. Faith smiled softly, "You were wrong about me being Buffy's whole world Dawn..."

"No I'm not. You are Faith. You have to know by now just how much Buffy loves you. How could you not? I know you aren't stupid. You're her whole world." Dawn blurted out before she could stop herself, cutting Faith off. She couldn't believe after what happened today that she had the audacity to actually argue with Faith. She snapped her mouth shut, pulling her lower lip in between her teeth and biting down on it. Her eyes grew wide when she saw the twinkle of amusement flash in Faith's eyes at her actions.

"No I'm not wrong and in a way you aren't either. It's not just me, who is Buffy's whole world, Dawn. You are too. Just like you and Buffy are my whole world. You and Buffy, you're my family. The only real family I've ever had, I guess I forgot that. I'm kinda new to all of this family stuff. Kinda new at talking about things and not running away from them. It's the only thing I knew how to do. And I wasn't leaving Buffy. I was just gonna stay with Mars for a few days. I was... I was afraid if I stayed here right now, I might hurt you. It's what I would have done before. If you had done what you did today the first time I was in Sunnydale I would have hurt you an..."

Dawn felt her bottom lip slip out from between her teeth and she knew that she was going to open her big mouth and argue with Faith again. Only this time she knew what was going to come out of her mouth was something Faith needed to hear and in her heart, she knew it was the right thing to do, so she cut Faith off again.

"No you wouldn't have. You can tell yourself all you want that you would have hurt me but you wouldn't have. I know that. You've never hurt me, ever, not once and you could have plenty of times. We both know that. How many times did I run into after you went to work for the Mayor? And even though in reality I really wasn't there then, how come the memories the Monks gave me and you, gave everyone, didn't have you hurting or coming after me to hurt Buffy? Did you ever think about that Faith?" Dawn paused, she had rushed it all out in one long breath, she was definitely spending too much time with Willow. She took a huge breath and opened her mouth again before Faith or Buffy could interrupt her.

"I could have come after you with a sword today and even if I had managed to cut you, you still wouldn't have hurt me back. I know that and nothing you could ever say or believe about yourself - or do - will ever make me believe that you could. The Monks knew that and that's why all of the memories I have of you are all good. Even my Mom knew that, it's why even after all you did and were in jail she kept in touch with Kate. Why she had Angel come get you in the courtroom that day. She saw who you really were and not who you tried to pretend to be, just like I always saw who you were. If anyone hurt anyone, it was me. The things I said today, there is no excuse for them. I don't believe any of them are true, none of them and I just hope that someday you can forgive me. You're my family too, you've... in my heart you've always been my other big sister and I'm sorry and I know that's lame but I don't know how else to tell you how ashamed I am of what I did today I am... I..." She took in huge gulps of air; her heart was hammering against her chest. She lowered her eyes and then raised them back up to Faith.

"Faith do you? Do... do you hate me?" She held her breath as she waited for Faith to answer her.

"I... I could never hate you... You're my little sister Dawn. You always have been. I love you Gamin, you're my family." Faith opened her arms up wide in invitation to Dawn.

Dawn almost knocked them both over she threw herself into Faith arms so forcefully. They both laughed a little at the sound that Faith made upon impact and the little squeak that came out of her from Dawn hugging her so tightly. Faith managed to squeeze her own little squeak out of Dawn as well from her tightly wrapped arms.

"I love you too Faith. I really am sorry..." The last word came out with a hiccup as Dawn started to cry again.

"I love you too... I won't lie I am hurt by what you said. Not to mention a little pissed off." Faith told Dawn gently.

"Me to..o... I me..an p..issed of..f at me t..oo." Dawn whispered back between hiccups.

"Me three..." Buffy said as she walked up to them.

Dawn and Faith unwrapped an arm from around each other and pulled Buffy into their hug.

After a few minutes of their group hug, Buffy told them, "I love you guys so much..."

"I love you all so much too..." Faith said next.

"I love you both even more..." Dawn put in her two-cents-worth.

"Well I love you all twice as much as even more..." Buffy said then they all groaned at how corny they were being.

"This is so bad for my image..." Faith giggled, ruining her image just a little more.

"What image is that Faith? The one you have when you're wearing your feety pajamas with Snoopy on them? Or the one where you cried all the way through..."

"B! You promised you'd never tell!" Faith yelled, squeezing both Summers' girls harder.

"Through what? Cried through what Buffy?" Dawn squirmed out of the group hug; breathing had started to become an issue.

"I'mhungryanybodyelsehungryI'llcook!"

"You're always hungry Faith! But you can cook and while you're cooking, Buffy can tell me what it was that you cried all the way through."

"Ah fuck!" Faith stamped her foot and headed towards the kitchen. She smiled when her family shouted out her name for cursing as they trailed behind her. She knew they all still needed to talk about what happened together. She knew from the bond she shared with Buffy that Buffy hadn't told Dawn everything. But it was late or rather very early in the morning, she was hungry, they were hungry, they all needed a little break, a few giggles, a few smiles and a lot of sleep.

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Buffy had cancelled all of their plans for the day. She and Faith had decided that they all should spend the day together concentrating on themselves as a family and trying to work through what had happened the day before. Both Slayers were nervous about telling Dawn of their experiences in Glory's Slayer Hell. They had decided together that Faith would be the one to tell Dawn about what happened, with Buffy only interjecting if she felt the need. They shared a silent understanding that it was entirely up to Faith to decide how much or how little to tell Dawn about what had happened to her at both Glory and Johnny's hands.

They spent the morning hedging around the issue, neither Dawn nor Buffy tried to push Faith into talking. Faith had barely uttered a word to either of them all morning. This was a conversation she had hoped to never have with anyone, let alone Dawn. She had done what she needed to survive, not just in Glory's Hell but her whole life and she was afraid of what she would see in Dawn's eyes once she knew all of it. Faith had no intention of telling her the gory details, but she had to tell Dawn enough of it for her to understand, she was going to keep it as PG as possible. Even so, Dawn was far from stupid, she would be able to read what was between the lines and Faith was afraid that once Dawn did, she would lose her.

Finally, as it neared afternoon, Faith suggested that they have a picnic down at the lake. She wanted to do this outside, in the wide-open space by the lake instead of in the cottage, which seemed to be growing smaller as the day grew long. She wanted to be in the fresh air, hear the birds chirping and feel the warmth of the sun upon her skin as she told her dark tale.

After they finished their lunch, they all made themselves comfortable on the large blanket Buffy had brought. Faith sat with her back up against a massive ancient oak tree, Buffy sat right next to her. Dawn sprawled out on her side facing them. Dawn watched as Faith leaned her head back against the tree, she lifted a visibly shaking hand, ran it through her hair, then lowered it and blindly reached out and found Buffy's hand with her own.

"When we first woke up there..." Faith paused, not sure if this was where she wanted to start. She felt Buffy squeeze her hand reassuringly. She stared at Dawn for long seconds then slid her eyes away. "When we woke after falling through the portal we didn't know that Glory had us. Buffy didn't know who had us but I did. The place we were at was familiar to me, I had been there before. I thought, when I first realized where I was, that I was dead and in hell. Thought that I had somehow pulled Buffy into hell with me and not just because of where we were but because of the things I had done. I have no doubt, if I had died that night after falling into the portal that hell is where I would have ended up. I knew he was dead and that if there were such a thing as heaven and hell, that hell was where Johnny would be. And when he came through the front door of the cabin I knew we were in hell." She paused again and took a few deep breaths.

"This wasn't a new hell to me. I had lived in this hell before with him. It was my personal hell, him, there, was, had been for a very long time, my greatest fear. When I was six my father left my mother..." She saw the look of surprise on Buffy's face out of the corner of her eye, but it didn't even come close to the surprise she felt within herself at the words that had just came out of her mouth. She hadn't, until they came out any intention of telling Dawn about her childhood, but something inside of her needed Dawn to know all of it. She needed to know if Dawn could still love her after she heard it all, heard all her secrets. She gathered her courage around her like a coat and unconsciously slid a little closer to Buffy, leaning a little on her soul-mate's strength.

"My Mother, she started drinking a lot..."

Dawn kept her eyes glued on Faith as she talked, while Faith stared out sightlessly over the lake as she spoke, her gaze internal, her voice monotone. It was almost as if she were talking about someone else, or retelling a story that someone had told to her once; a horror story, the kind that made you sleep with your lights on at night. The kind of story you wished the most creative of writers could never, even in their wildest imaginings ever come up with, the kind of story you wished could never, ever, be true. Dawn couldn't keep the silent tears from falling down her face, she cried for the Dark Slayer, somehow knowing that Faith very rarely, if ever, cried for herself.

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"...and that was why we came here. We didn't mean to make you feel like we deserted you. I was having a hard time dealing with all of this. I had asked Buffy earlier in the day if we could come spend some time here, we were going to tell you about it. But then that happened at Mars afterwards and well... I was too caught up in my own problems and Buffy... well, I... If it wasn't for her, I would have never survived there. I would never have survived after we got back. I'm sorry for leaving you alone, making you feel that you had no one. I know how that feels. I just... I..." Faith trailed off, her voice was raw, hoarse from talking for so long.

She shivered a little as a gentle breeze dried the cold clammy sweat on her body. Her hand felt stiff and she could only imagine how Buffy's felt after being gripped so tightly within her own for so long. She tried to release Buffy's hand, only Buffy wouldn't let her. She kept her eyes on the lake afraid to look at Dawn, afraid she might see pity, disgust for her in Dawn's eyes. Afraid she might see in Dawn's eyes all those things she had felt about herself for so long. Her heart tried to tell her mind that she wouldn't, but it wasn't listening, too many years of seeing those things in other's eyes had left permanent scars upon her.

Dawn waited for Faith to look at her. She knew Faith had told her a very, very watered-down version of her life and what had happened to both she and Buffy when they had been held captive. But despite her age, she knew exactly what Faith hadn't told her and realized that it was probably ten times worse than what she even imagined. Last night she hadn't understood what Buffy had been talking about when she said that Faith had sacrificed herself for her, how she had hidden her greatest fear from Glory, but now she did; and Dawn couldn't even begin to imagine what that had done to the Dark Slayer on the inside. She had asked no questions, had remained silent throughout, respecting what her sister had asked of her the night before and giving that same respect to Faith as well. She didn't know what to say anyway. What do you say to someone that had been through the things Faith had? What do you say to someone who had willingly endured all that Faith had to spare someone else, and not just anyone but Buffy, her sister, the horrors she had experienced.

She had loved Faith before, but, by the time Faith had finished, the love she felt before paled compared to the love she had now for the Dark Slayer. The respect she had for the Dark Slayer for turning her life around grew a million times more. She was awed, humbled and honored to have Faith in her life as her sister. More than once since her return to Sunnydale Faith had set aside her own wants, needs, desires, for others. She had risked everything, including her life, her sanity, had been willing to throw everything away that she worked so hard for to make sure that not just Buffy, but Dawn, the Scoobs, all of them survived Glory. For that, she would have Dawn's unconditional love and support forever.

She watched as Faith licked her parched lips, she reached over and grabbed a bottle of water out of the cooler. She stood up and slowly inched her way over to Faith. She knelt down in front of her and handed her the water.

Faith saw Dawn approach her with the water out of the corner of her eye but still she couldn't bring herself to look at her. She held her hand out for the bottle and mumbled a thank you, still refusing to turn her eyes towards Dawn. She chugged down the whole bottle without pause. She dropped the bottle to the ground and closed her eyes. She couldn't deal, she couldn't bear the thought that Dawn would reject her, or feel any of those things she had felt about herself for so long.

Dawn had been the one good, one shiny bright light in her life for so long. The only good, real, true memories in the darkness she had lived in for so long. The memories she had of Dawn had sustained her, had made her see what life could have been like had she done things differently, how her life could be if she turned it around. And she had turned her life around, had gotten more than she had ever dreamed was possible. Had gotten all those secret wishes, had gotten what she had never told anyone she wanted, had gotten what she had only wished for late at night in her secret heart of hearts and now she was afraid of losing one of the people that had always been a part of those dreams.

It took her a second or two to realize she was being hugged. Another second to realize that it wasn't Buffy but Dawn who was hugging her and another second to open her eyes, a little afraid that when she did she would wake up and it would have only been a dream. She returned the hug fiercely, squeezing all the air and a very loud squeak out of Dawn. She heard a muffled, 'Thank you,' and, an 'I love you,' followed by a squeaked out, 'Can't breath,' come from Dawn whose head was buried against her shoulder.

She released Dawn, who sat back on her calves. Faith finally found her courage and looked into Dawn's eyes. What she saw there shouldn't have surprised her but it did anyway. She saw the same things in Dawn's eyes that she had seen in Buffy's all those months ago when Buffy had found out all her secrets. Compassion, sympathy, empathy, anger at the perpetrators of the abuse, but not a hint of accusation, pity or disgust was in Dawn's eyes. And above all else, even stronger was unwavering, unconditional love.

"No. Thank you, Gamin," Faith whispered to Dawn.

"You're welcome." Dawn told her just as softly, then even softer, "I really am sorry about yesterday. I was wrong."

"I know you are, we know you are. Been there, done that a few times myself." Faith let out a little self-depreciating chuckle.

"You still mad at me?" Dawn asked her, but she already knew the answer.

"A little yeah..."

"You still mad too Buffy?" Dawn asked, already knowing Buffy's answer too.

"A little yeah..."

Then Dawn saw the evil twinkle show up in both Slayers' eyes and knew she was in deep shit. Not bad deep shit, but deep shit nonetheless. Little did she realize how literal that thought would turn out to be.

"But you know..." Buffy started.

"...you did say..." Faith cut in.

"...that you would..." Buffy continued.

"I hate when you guys do this..." Dawn interjected.

"...would do anything to make up for this..." Faith continued as if Dawn hadn't spoken.

"...so you can start by..." Buffy smiled at the image she got from Faith through their bond at what Faith was going to tell Dawn to do. Their bond certainly made things like this much easier.

"...cleaning the stalls in the stable..." Faith finished with a smirk.

"No way! I'm so not doin' that!" Dawn crossed her arms and glared at them. She knew she would end up doing it, but she wasn't going to give in that easily.

"And you might..." Faith started this time.

"...want to change your clothes first..." Buffy continued.

"...because it's kinda a dirty job..." Faith finished and then outright laughed at the look on Dawn's face.

"This is so not fair... Two against one... Not fair..." Dawn grumbled and groaned mumbling to herself as she stalked off towards the cottage. She turned around and shouted at the laughing Slayers, "I LOVE YOU GUYS!"

"WE LOVE YOU TOO DAWNIE!" They shouted back together.

"We are so startin' to get way too corny, B..."

"I'd have to agree Sweetums, honeypie, darling, light o' my life, my little love muffin!"

Faith looked at Buffy with wide-eyed horror as she started spouting out her over-sweet endearments. She put her fingers in her ears so she didn't have to listen to anymore and Buffy grabbed the opportunity to start tickling her. Two seconds later, she found herself being tickled without mercy by both Dawn and Buffy.

"U... Sum...m...mers'... do...n't... p...lay... fai...r!" She got out between bouts of laughter and started laughing harder when both Buffy and Dawn just nodded their heads in agreement.

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She watched them as they walked down the path that led between all of the cottages privacy-protection barriers towards the portal that would take her back to Sunnydale, Obsidian trailing behind them. They had asked her to stay with them a while longer. Since she had arrived here on what was a late Friday afternoon earth time she could stay longer than the week originally planned before she had to return on earth's Sunday in time to get a good night's sleep for school the next day. So she had ended up staying an additional two weeks. Dawn couldn't help but think that they were probably the best two weeks of her life.

The first few days after the day she had lost it on Faith while they were training had been awkward, despite the laughter and the ease with which she and Faith had fallen back into their relationship. The hurtful words Dawn had spoken still hung in the air between them, as well as between her and Buffy. She had apologized so many times that both Slayers had asked her to stop and Dawn finally realized that after saying 'I'm sorry' over and over the two words started to lose their meaning. Instead, she decided to let her actions speak for her and she had subtly begun a campaign of showing both Slayers how much they meant to her.

She reminded them of the fun they had together, thanked them for the things they had done for her. She told them stories, most of them were about the times she had spent with Faith the first time the Dark Slayer had come to Sunnydale. She told them all about the things Joyce had said about the Dark Slayer. She gave both Slayers, but most importantly Faith, a glimpse through her eyes of exactly how she saw Faith. As the days passed they all grew closer together as sisters, as friends, as a family and Dawn finally understood exactly what the phrase, 'Home is where the heart is,' meant.

She saw a side to Buffy and Faith that she never thought she would ever see over the last two weeks. Sure, they had fun those weeks when Buffy had gone after and brought Faith back from LA, but being here was different. In Sunnydale even when they were out having fun there was always a part of the Slayers that was always on alert, they couldn't, ever, not really, completely let themselves relax. None of them could really, they were all too aware of what hid in the darkness.

It made her a little sad though to know that once the Slayers returned to Sunnydale, the totally carefree young women she had come to know and had spent the last three weeks with would be gone. She grew to have a true appreciation for who and what they were, for what they had tried and were still trying to give, do for her. They wanted for her all the things they wanted for themselves but could not have, not completely; they wanted to give her the gift of normal happy life. A life that didn't include demons, vampires, apocalypses and death on a daily basis.

It was funny too, considering she was a few years younger than them, to realize just how young they both really were. She guessed her perception of them was skewed because they were Slayers. The things they had both seen, had both had to do, gave them an air, a sense of maturity that exceeded their real age. The responsibilities, the weight they both carried upon their shoulders had taken away their time, their opportunity to be truly young, Faith even more so than Buffy. Now not only did they carry the burden of being Slayers, but they had been thrust into the roles of provider and parent as well.

As much as they wanted her to have a normal happy life, she wanted even more than they did for themselves, for them to have a happy long life together. So, she wished and prayed for the things she knew they didn't allow themselves to wish and pray for. She wanted them to have the chance to be young, go to college, take vacations, have laughter be a daily part of their lives. She wanted them to have the chance to have children if they wanted, to celebrate their twenty-fifth, fiftieth anniversary together. She had not a doubt that they would stay together for the rest of their lives, the bond between them, the love, was stronger than even the strongest metal known in any universe and it made her dance with joy inside every time she saw them together. She would consider herself the luckiest girl in the world if she could find someone who loved her half as much as Buffy and Faith loved each other.

She made a silent vow to herself as they walked those last few feet to the portal. She would do nothing to add to their already overburden shoulders; instead she would do everything within her power to help them have the happy long life together they so richly deserved. She would cajole, plead, push and force them to take care of themselves, be careful, live life, make time for themselves, everything and anything she could do to help them have a full life outside of being Slayers. She had every intention when she got back to Sunnydale of recruiting all the rest of her extended family, witches, mortals, vampires, and Immortals alike in helping her achieve this goal.

As Dawn stood in front of the portal with her sisters-friends-mentors-ala-parents, hugging them goodbye with tears in her eyes, there was a dream that Dawn carried in her heart. A dream that Dawn was determined would someday come true.

One day she wanted to walk into the garden of the mansion, fifty, sixty, many, many years from now, just as the sun was beginning to rise and see two little old gray-haired retired Slayers cuddled up on the lounge chair, giggling and kissing as they waited for the sun to rise and listened for the promises the new day brought forth.

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They stood quietly and watched Dawn as she walked into the portal. They had only three more days here until they had to return to Sunnydale themselves. Atropos had told them, if they stayed any longer, it could seriously change what was 'Fated' within the Tapestry of Life. They served a purpose within their own domain and not just as Slayers. Dawn, as well as their extended family were part of that purpose. Their destinies lay within their own domain and not here within the domain of the Immortals. They were assured however, that they would be able to return here and that they would see all of the Immortals quite frequently. The Living Scroll had ensured that. According to it, the Immortals' destinies were entwined with those of the Slayers and the others. Regardless of what the Living Scroll had said or not said, Atropos informed them the other day, in a voice that brooked no argument, they were family and they were stuck with them whether they liked it or not.

"I think I'm actually gonna miss her..." Buffy sighed as she leaned back against Faith and watched the portal as it started slowly to close. She tipped her head back onto Faith's shoulder, turned it slightly and peered up at Faith.

"I am too Giz..." Faith tightened her arms around Buffy's waist; she leaned her cheek next to Buffy's and smiled as she felt Buffy lay her hands lightly on top of hers.

Buffy smiled as she heard the purring rumbling out of Faith's chest. Her answering purr grew as she felt Faith's thumbs tenderly stroking her stomach. The tender stroking was sending little darts of pleasure through her. She let out a soft moan and her thoughts hazily drifted away, her own hands started to caress the back of Faith's. One of Faith's hands slid down and under her midriff t-shirt to softly stroke her bare skin which elicited another soft moan from her. Her thoughts took a decidedly wicked turn when it suddenly sunk in that she and Faith were alone, no Dawn, no Immortals, for the first time in three weeks. She twisted quickly around in Faith's arms and captured Faith's mouth with her own in one fell swoop.

Faith felt her knees grow weak as Buffy kissed her like there was no tomorrow. She loved kissing Buffy. She could kiss her forever. She loved Buffy's soft lips, the velvety texture of her tongue as it danced with her own. The way Buffy kissed her as if she could never get enough, as if there was no one and nothing else in the world. A kiss from Buffy always made her feel that way, whether it was a soft peck on the lips or an outright kiss of passion that made her toes curl. They put all the pent up need and passion from suppressing their desire to make love with each other for the last three weeks into the kiss.

Somehow, Buffy's hands ended up around Faith's neck. She ran them up into Faith's hair, she softly alternated between massaging and raking her nails along Faith's scalp. She moaned into the kiss when she felt Faith's nipples harden and press insistently against her own breasts.

Faith felt a trail of goose-bumps make their way down her spine at Buffy's caressing hands, she squirmed a little as the crotch of her pants seemed to become oppressively tight. Her hands drifted down Buffy's back to the top of her buttocks and she pulled Buffy into her hard. She growled low in her throat when she felt Buffy press in to her harder and start grinding her pelvis into hers.

They were both breathing hard when they ended the kiss, Buffy's eyes gold, Faith's emerald. Buffy's breathing went into hyper-drive as Faith slid a leg in-between her own and pressed her thigh up into her. The whoosh of air as the portal closed completely brought back to them the reality of where they were. The last thing either wanted after waiting three long weeks to be together was someone stumbling upon them again!

"Cottage... Now..." Faith growled out, a wolfish smile appeared when she saw the shudder of desire go through Buffy.

She had plans for Buffy, especially since Buffy had spent the last three weeks whispering to her at every opportunity exactly what she wanted them to do once they were alone. She let all those images Buffy had conjured up in her mind over the last few weeks flow to Buffy through their bond. Her smile grew more wolfish as she watched Buffy's eyes grow wide then heavy with desire and the little gasp Buffy gave as she was hit with the feelings the images created made Faith laugh low and throatily. She picked Buffy up and hoisted her onto Obsidian's back then climbed up behind her.

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Faith scooted up as close as possible behind Buffy on Obsidian. The fact that they were riding bareback made it much easier, she wrapped her arms around Buffy, her hands going up and under Buffy's shirt to lay unmoving right under Buffy's breasts. She felt Buffy's skin grow warmer under her hands, using her chin, she moved Buffy's hair aside, then rested it upon Buffy's shoulder.

Little tremors started running through Buffy from the warmth of Faith's breath caressing her neck and the outright heat of Faith's hands on her bare skin. She pushed back into Faith a little more and shuddered as she felt Faith's thumbs start to skim lazily along the underside of her breasts.

"You feel so good..." Faith started in a low, throaty voice, "Your skin is so soft, so warm, so creamy... I can't wait until we get back to the cottage so I can see, taste, what I'm feeling..."

Buffy let out a little frustrated moan at both Faith's words and her thumbs that were still only just running a delicate line across the underside of her breasts.

"It feels like forever since I've had the taste of you in my mouth," Faith continued her own voice growing huskier as her desire grew. "Heard those little low throaty moans, sighs, growls you make when I touch you. When I run my fingers over your nipples or my tongue along the side of your neck..."

"You're a big tease Fai... And I'm as quiet as a church mouse, I have no idea what you are talking about..." Buffy mumbled her senses on overload from the images that continued to play havoc with her mind and the sound of Faith's voice in her ear. She could listen to that low, husky rasp of Faith's for eternity and Buffy was quite sure that if Faith tried she could make her come just by talking to her.

"Really? Guess I'll just have to remind you..." Faith chuckled low in Buffy's ear, then caught her lobe between her teeth and sucked on it gently before releasing it. She started to place soft teasing kisses along the side of Buffy's neck, her teeth nibbling, her tongue sneaking out for quick tastes; she smiled when Buffy let out a soft moan. "And... that would be... What? A non-noise, Miss Quiet-as-a-Church-Mouse..." She whispered against Buffy's skin.

Buffy let her head fall back onto Faith's shoulder giving her further access to her neck. It felt like forever since Faith had touched her, held her, kissed her, forever since she had touched, kissed and held Faith in return. She looked around quickly wondering how long it would be before they got back to the cottage, she didn't think she could wait. She saw that Obsidian had wandered into the woods that surrounded the outskirts of the property that belonged to their cottage, then her eyes slid closed as Faith's hands slid up to cover her breasts. A ragged moan came from deep within her and Buffy felt a pulse start to pound inside of her.

Faith let out her own moan as her fingertips ran over Buffy's breasts. She captured one begging nipple between her fingers, pinching it lightly, then rolling it with her callused fingertips. She felt Buffy's desire surge through her from their bond and an answering wetness pooled between her legs. Right now, she wished she had worn anything but her skintight black jeans. The seam in the crotch was pushing hard, roughly against her clit and the gentle motion of Obsidian as he slowly walked through the forest wasn't helping her at all. She began blazing a trail of kisses, nipping, sucking, tracing with her tongue along every piece of Buffy's bare skin her mouth could reach. She growled a little when she felt Buffy's hands grab hold of her thighs and start to run along them.

"Maybe..." Buffy started then stopped as one of Faith's hands left her breast and started a slow trek downward.

"Maybe what, B?" Faith murmured around Buffy's neck. Her fingertips were tingling as she ran them down Buffy's bare skin to her hip. She slid Buffy a little bit forward away from her then ran her fingertips teasingly along the waistband of Buffy's sweatpants, dipping below them to run one finger along the line of soft curls that hid Buffy's sex. "You were saying..."

Buffy just whimpered, raising herself up a little, trying to bring that teasing finger to where she wanted it. She clutched at Faith's thighs, her fingers digging in hard as Faith began to rub the palm of her hand back and forth across her nipple. She turned her head to run her tongue along Faith's jaw line and couldn't suppress her own smile when she felt Faith jump just a little.

"I want..." Buffy whispered against Faith's jaw, once again getting distracted, this time by the feel of Faith's breasts, the hard nipples pressing into her back as Faith bent them both forward so she could run the hand that had been teasing her curls down along the length of one thigh.

Faith wasn't sure who she was torturing more, herself or Buffy. She rubbed herself like a cat up against Buffy's back, growling low with need against the softness of Buffy's skin. She ran her fingertips down as far as she could along one of Buffy's thighs then backtracked up along the inside of her firm thigh. Stopping when she felt the wetness that had dripped down, swirling her fingers in it, painting it along Buffy's inner thigh.

"What was it you wanted B? I know what I want..." Faith ran her hand further up the inside of Buffy's thigh, then slid into the wetness that was waiting for her. She ran her fingertips down into Buffy's center, gathering up her mate's essence, her heart pounded furiously against her chest. Her breathing hitched and her own center throbbed in need.

"W... what...?" Buffy barely could speak let alone hold onto a thought with Faith's teasing fingers running along her heat. She growled in frustration as she felt those same teasing fingers move away and trail for a second up along her stomach then lift away.

"I want to taste you and I can't wait 'til we get back to the cottage. I want to taste you now..." Faith brought her hand up to her mouth, she ran her slick fingers along her bottom lip before slowly sliding them into her mouth and gently sucking on them.

Buffy's eyes grew wide as Faith brought her fingers to her mouth. Her tongue came out to trace along her own lips in longing, she twisted around, praying that she didn't fall off Obsidian. She arched herself up and brought her mouth to Faith's, kissing Faith around her fingers. She nipped at Faith's bottom lip, her tongue coming out to play, running along that pouty bottom lip and tasting herself there.

Faith moved her fingers away and brought her mouth down hard onto Buffy's. Her tongue demanded entrance, she dominated the kiss taking what she wanted, drawing out a moaned response from Buffy. She grabbed Buffy behind the neck and pressed her head into her even tighter, not sure how they hadn't fallen off the horse yet. She felt like she was going to come just from kissing Buffy, she started kissing her harder, ravishing Buffy's mouth as she felt in an echo that Buffy was feeling the same way. Her hand upon Buffy's breast became relentless, rolling the nipple, teasing it with light, then hard touches, then no touch. She dragged her mouth away from Buffy's and moved Buffy until she was leaning back against her again. She looked quickly around and had no idea where the hell they were, she didn't care at this point, she had to touch that wet heat again.

Faith trailed her hand down the creamy expanse of Buffy's overheated stomach. She slipped it under the waistband of her sweats and ran a lone finger once again along the edge of the soft, moist curls, then to the side delicately stroking the soft skin between Buffy's center and her inner thigh. She ran a path across Buffy's sex to the other side and stroked the soft skin there just as delicately. She then gently cupped Buffy's mound, her hand just resting unmoving, as Buffy's pelvis rolled up into her hand, following the motion of Obsidian as he carried the two of them. She started to explore finally after a few seconds the wet folds beneath her fingertips.

"God B... do you know what you do to me?" Faith continued lightly running her fingertips over the outside of Buffy's wet heat, her own body reacting fiercely to Buffy's. "So hot... so wet... so damn beautiful..."

Buffy was incapable of speech. She was ablaze, she tried to raise her hips up harder into Faith's hands but found the task impossible while riding bareback on Obsidian, there was nothing to use as leverage. She was already perched precariously at the edge of release and Faith had yet to touch her really. Her growl of frustration turned into one of pure desire as Faith finally increased the pressure of her fingers against her. She hissed as those fingers still moved slowly upon her, following the motion of the horse that was carrying them.

"Easy Giz... Not so fast..." Faith whispered to her, knowing exactly how frustrating, how torturous this felt to Buffy. She let out a harsh breath as she slipped her fingers into Buffy's molten heat and felt the silky texture of Buffy surround her intimately. She kicked her heels against Obsidian's flanks and he changed from a slow walk to a trot. She moved her fingers within Buffy using the natural rhythm of the horse to guide her.

"F...fa...st... is good..." Buffy gasped out, her hands once again clutching at Faith's thighs, knowing she would leave marks this time. She felt the tension coil deep within her and knew her climax was approaching fast.

"Hold it off..." Faith mumbled to Buffy as if she had read her mind. She was feeling everything Buffy was feeling through their bond, her own center pulsing in time with the heat waves running through Buffy. She wanted to bring Buffy higher before she found her release.

"Can't Fai..." Buffy felt a mini-shockwave of release go through her and she moaned low and loud.

"Please... for me... Wait..." She lightened her touch upon Buffy slowing down the motion of her hand. Her thumb circling around Buffy's swollen clit, barely skimming it, pulling back when she felt Buffy reach the crest. Her other hand went back to teasingly touching Buffy's breasts, her stomach, any part of her skin she could reach. Loving the taste of Buffy's sweat and desire on her tongue, her mouth never strayed far from Buffy's neck. "Like silk, B. You feel like silk..."

Faith closed her eyes and fell into what Buffy was feeling. She kept up her slow tortuous thrusting into Buffy; she felt a shadow-like stroke of the same touch inside of her. Weeks ago, when she had first acknowledged this new sensation from their bond it hadn't been nearly as intense. Little by little both she and Buffy, with Lilly's help, had learned how to control it, how to block it. For some reason Faith, like before, adapted and opened to this new connection faster than Buffy. Right now Faith opened the connection up wide, wanting to experience everything that Buffy was feeling with her. She teased Buffy up to the edge again and slowly backed her down again.

"Tease... missed you... missed..." She couldn't finish. She just let herself sink back into Faith. Sink into what she was feeling, what Faith was making her feel. She opened their connection letting all she was feeling, the love, the passion, the lust flow between them. She was surprised, though she shouldn't have been that Faith was already right there, already sunk deeply into the bond that was now such a part of them.

Faith kicked her heels into Obsidian's sides again, urging him into a full out gallop. She slid further into Buffy, drowning in the intimacy of Buffy pulsating around her fingers. Her thumb drifted up to circle and swirl around the heart of Buffy's desire as her fingers kept moving inside of Buffy with the natural rolling motion of the fast galloping horse. Her heart slammed against her chest at the low sensuous moan that came from Buffy. At the sound of Buffy calling her name again and again, as Buffy made her, her whole world. It still amazed her that she could make Buffy feel this way and though she never said it aloud, not even to Buffy, every time she touched, kissed Buffy and every time Buffy touched, kissed her it felt like the first time. Every touch, every kiss, was new, exciting, amazing and it humbled and awed her.

Buffy fell further into Faith, further into the sensations that seemed to be all the stronger since she could not really move with Faith's warm fingers within her. Stronger because she could only lean back into her mate and just allow herself to enjoy the sensations Faith was creating within her. Then the first wave of her release crashed over her in a blinding, earth-shattering wave, and the only thing she knew was Faith and that Faith was sharing this with her through their bond.

Faith moaned with Buffy as the first wave of her release crashed over her, then moaned again as what Buffy was feeling washed over her in an echo. She pulled Buffy's trembling body tighter to her and kicked Obsidian into a faster gallop. Her hands moving upon Buffy still, to extend her pleasure, draw it out, higher, then the second wave of Buffy's peak washed over her and Faith started to tremble with Buffy, teetering on the edge of release with her. When the third wave of Buffy's climax washed over her in an echo, Faith yelped in surprise, then yelped again when she started cumming with Buffy and cumming hard.

Buffy's insides contracted again when Faith started to moan her name hot and heavy into her ear. Desire, heat, lust, rose up fiercely in her again, as Faith's fingers started to move even faster within her, Faith's thumb once again circling relentlessly upon her clit. It was too much and Buffy felt another climax claim her almost as strong as the first one and this time she couldn't contain her yell of Faith's name as she was dragged down into a whirlpool of desire, lust, passion, love and simply Faith. They fed off each other's release, prolonging it, their world once again narrowing down to just the two of them.

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It took them a minute or two to realize that Obsidian had stopped moving and that they were at the field by the stable, where Sol was grazing lazily behind the fence. Buffy was slumped boneless in Faith's arms, sated, but not sated at the same time. Her body was sated, but her heart wasn't, her need to touch, kiss Faith was pounding hot and heavy through her veins. As the haze started to clear from her intense climaxes, she belatedly realized that Faith had climaxed too, without even being touched.

"Wow... Did what I just think happen, happen..." Buffy asked Faith, the answer she received was an unintelligible mumble against her shoulder. "Faith did you just..."

"Yeah..." Faith said in a clearer mumble cutting off Buffy. "That's never happened to me before," she mumbled and with a little shock felt herself blush.

Buffy's whole insides clenched at the thought that Faith had climaxed from just touching her. It blew her away, and it humbled her in a way she had never been humbled before to know she had that effect on Faith. She realized that their bond might have something to do with it, but still, the bond had been a part of them for a while now and this had never happened to either of them before.

Faith jumped down off Obsidian and her knees almost buckled out from under her. She was embarrassed and she knew that it was a ridiculous reaction. She looked up at Buffy and saw the evil twinkle in her eyes and the cocky smile that was gracing her face.

"Little shaky there S.O.?" Buffy wiggled her eyebrows at Faith, loving the fact that she was blushing. "Well, S.O.?" Buffy asked her when Faith just looked back at her mutely.

"So what?"

"Not so what. . It's my new nickname for you." She smiled at the quizzical look on Faith's face. "Ya know, S.O." Buffy said as if saying it again would explain what she meant. She opened her eyes wide her grin growing larger. Faith just shrugged her shoulders, even more confused. "Significant Other... S.O. but in your case, Sexy Other, Sensuous Other, Sumptuous Other, Seductive Other all apply too."

Faith flashed her own grin back up at Buffy, 'Significant Other' she liked it. "I think I like being your , Giz. Does that mean you're mine too?"

"Wouldn't have it any other way Faith..." She smiled again when Faith reached up to help her down from Obsidian.

Faith set Buffy down gently on her feet and it was a good thing she keep her hands on Buffy's hips because Buffy's legs gave right out from under her. "Guess I ain't the only one that's a little shaky there Giz..." Faith chuckled.

Buffy steadied her legs and stood up straight, she looked Faith in the eyes before she spoke. "True enough. Still your legs are shaky and you came and I haven't even touched you yet!" Buffy couldn't resist smiling at Faith, when Faith's face get a little redder, "Imagine what's going to happen when I do touch you. When I run my nails down your back, along the insides of your arms. When I nibble along your neck and scrap my teeth along that little spot behind your ear, then trail my tongue down to my mark on your pulse point, to bite and suck upon it... Can you imagine Faith?" Buffy asked her in a smooth, low sultry voice.

They stared at each other and the fire that they had only just put out flared into life again. Higher, hot enough to start a forest fire, even Obsidian backed away from them as the heat of their gaze blazed between them.

Faith swallowed hard, her mouth, throat, dry just at the thought. She reached out blindly to open the gate and let Obsidian join his mate in the field. He brayed loudly for his mate, taking off towards her at breakneck speed as Faith pulled Buffy to her with the same speed. She brought her mouth down to Buffy's in an out and out delicate, carnal, slow, sensuous kiss that left them both breathless and with shaky legs again.

They began kissing again, feverishly, carnality pouring off both of them. Now was not the time for slow, their need for each other was still too strong, too hot. There was so much time to make up for, not just the last three weeks, but all the weeks before, the months before. They kept kissing as they stumbled towards the cottage, which was a little less than a hundred feet away.

"Want you... need to touch you now..." Buffy moaned into their kiss. She reached down and pulled Faith's t-shirt out from her pants, her hand up and under it, laying claim to one of Faith's firm breasts before she even finished speaking.

Buffy's hand burned her breast and Faith pulled away from their kiss to bury her head into Buffy's neck. Her teeth capturing the sweet skin of Buffy's neck and biting down delicately. Her hands ran random patterns over Buffy's back, her nails scraping along the skin. She kept stumbling backwards towards the cottage pulling Buffy along with her.

They were halfway there when Faith felt Buffy fumbling with the buttons on her jeans. Patient she wasn't and Faith groaned when Buffy gave up and just ripped them open and pushed them down a little. She groaned again, as Buffy slid her hand inside and tortured her like she had tortured Buffy, by just cupping her aching center. Since patience wasn't a virtue that Faith possessed either, she wrapped her arms around Buffy, grabbing a buttock in each hand and lifted her up. She turned as Buffy wrapped her legs around her waist and reclaimed her mouth as she started running for the cottage, her pants starting to make their way towards her ankles.

Faith almost fell once or twice as her pants got tangled around her ankles, she let go of one sweet round buttock to open the door. She stumbled through the threshold and Buffy reached over her shoulder to slam it shut behind them.

Buffy wiggled in Faith's arms and dropped her legs from around her waist. She slid down the length of Faith's body as Faith let her go. She spun Faith around and began pushing her towards the bed.

"B, let me get my boots and pants off..." Faith rasped as she stumbled, trying not to fall as Buffy propelled her towards the bed backwards.

"Can't wait that long to touch you..." Buffy said as she pushed Faith down on the bed. "Want to taste you now... waited long enough..."

Faith fell backwards onto the bed her eyes opening wide in amazement at both Buffy's words and Buffy ripping her g-string right off of her. She didn't even try and protest when Buffy reached up and just ripped her t-shirt in half.

"Oh gods, Giz..." She arched her back, thrusting her breasts up into Buffy's warm, wet mouth and hand that had latched themselves onto her nipples. Each pinch, each bite, each flick of Buffy's tongue, each brush of a finger against her nipples sent a quicksilver pulse of raw heat straight to her throbbing, overheated, center.

The rest of her body arched in the wake of Buffy's other hand which roamed wherever it felt like. She tried to open her legs wider so Buffy could lay fully between them, but was unable because of her pants tangled around her ankles. She grunted as Buffy slid one firm thigh up between hers and she helplessly began to rub, grind against it wishing that it was Buffy's warm skin and not her sweatpants she felt.

Buffy groaned around Faith's nipple when she felt Faith's desire for her soak almost instantly through her sweatpants. She lightly scraped her nails up the inside of one of Faith's thighs then moaned at the wetness she found on her way up. She moaned loudly again, when she felt Faith's nails digging into her back then rake along the length of it. She rose up from Faith, supporting herself on her elbows so she could look down at her beautiful face.

Faith seized the opportunity when Buffy lifted from her, she quickly brought her hands around and grabbed the neck of Buffy's shirt and ripped it open. Then she pulled Buffy back down to her by the ripped halves of the shirt. They both purred out their pleasure as their bare skin made contact.

Buffy wasn't satisfied with that for long, she wanted the taste of Faith's flesh in her mouth again. She lifted herself back up, then dipped her head down and captured Faith's mouth. This time, it was she who dominated the kiss, exploring those luscious lips, running her tongue along the little dent on the bottom one.

Faith threw herself into the kiss, totally forgetting that only three weeks ago she feared having anyone, even Buffy pressing down on top of her. She tried to roll them over, but Buffy resisted her. She tried to pull Buffy back down onto her, but again Buffy resisted, so she just gave up and let Buffy have her way, it wasn't like she really minded after all. She whimpered a little as Buffy moved her mouth away and blazed a trail down her neck to the valley between her breast, to veer off finally seeking and then recapturing a nipple. She gripped the back of Buffy's head and pulled it down harder into her breast.

Buffy's hand was once again running teasingly along the inside of one of her thighs and Faith arched up into the touch. It annoyed her that she was unable to raise her legs up and bend her knees because they were trapped by her pants. She started to pull her legs apart, her thighs straining, her ankles yelling at her, she grunted with her effort and then finally she heard them rip apart at the crotch.

Buffy started to giggle around her nipple and Faith couldn't help it, she started to giggle herself.

"You didn't just do that, did you?" Buffy lifted her head and looked down at Faith's amused, desired filled face.

"It was annoying me B..." Faith pouted then started to giggle again. Her giggle turned into a full-blown moan, when Buffy's hand was suddenly sliding through her folds. "CHRIST B!"

Not caring how ridiculous she might look with her boots still on and half a ripped pant leg hanging around each ankle, she raised her knees and arched her hips up into Buffy's hand. She had more important things on her mind then how she looked. Like those delicately tracing fingers that were exploring all of her wet center and Buffy's breasts as they slid down across her own, over her stomach. To the nipple that teasingly replaced Buffy's fingers in her wetness for a few seconds. To Buffy's hot mouth and tongue which left a wet warm trail down the length of her body.

Buffy slid off the bed to kneel on the floor; her hands grasping Faith's hips and sliding her to the edge of the bed. She lifted first one leg and placed it on her shoulder, then lifted the other and placed it on her other shoulder.

Faith lifted herself up, leaning back on her elbows and looked down the length of her body to the smiling, mischievous face of her mate.

"Guess I should reward you for making this easier for me..." Buffy looked at Faith her eyes twinkling impishly, "So should I reward you Faith?"

Faith swallowed hard, her hips involuntarily bucked at just the thought. She opened her mouth and said yes, only nothing came out. Her mouth, throat, had become suddenly dry, she couldn't remember the last time she had felt Buffy's mouth on her. She swallowed again, hard.

"Well?" Buffy couldn't resisted teasing her again. Her own desire rose up fiercely in her, from both the look Faith was giving her and thought that she had rendered Faith speechless. She ran her fingertips, her nails up the inside of both of Faith's thighs. She lightly began to tease along Faith's swollen nether lips, her eyes never leaving Faith's.

Faith growled, then moaned as Buffy started to touch her again, her breathing labored, her eyelids growing heavy.

"Oh god... Yes..." She tried to pull Buffy closer to where she wanted her by pushing the heels of her booted feet against Buffy's back, but again Buffy resisted her. "Tease..."

"Yup... and I learned from the best." Buffy turned her head and nipped at the inside of Faith's thigh. Then her tongue came out to greedily lap at the wetness that was Faith's desire.

She ran her tongue up the inside of Faith's thigh then softly stroked the sensitive skin where it met the wiry curls that covered Faith's sex. The smell of Faith's arousal assaulted her senses, musky, heady and uniquely Faith. She flicked her tongue suddenly, quickly across Faith's clit and heard Faith yelp then did it again just so she could hear Faith yelp again. And Faith didn't disappoint her. She lifted her head to stare up at the Dark Slayer, a smile gracing her face.

That smile held a promise that made Faith tremble; she hadn't seen that look in such a long time. She held her breath in anticipation as Buffy kept her eyes locked with hers as she slowly licked her lips and then lowered her mouth towards her.

"B... god... B..." quickly became her new mantra as Buffy lavishly explored her with her tongue. She fell back to the bed unable to hold herself up anymore.

Buffy feasted. She was greedy for more of the ambrosia that was simply Faith. She closed her eyes and relearned, remembered, rediscovered Faith intimately. She brought her hand up to rediscover with her the joy, the pleasure that came with bringing, giving pleasure to the woman that was her heart and soul. The ecstasy that came with the knowledge that Faith would allow her this after all she had been through. She ran her fingers, her tongue over Faith's entire center, not entering her, Buffy's instinct, their bond still telling her that Faith wasn't ready for that yet. It didn't matter to Buffy, this was more than enough, this trust Faith was giving her.

She slid her free hand up Faith's side, she blindly reached for Faith's hand which was clenching the sheet tightly. She gently opened Faith's hand, interlacing their fingers, connecting them in yet another way as she rested their interwoven hands on Faith's stomach.

Faith was lost the second she felt Buffy's mouth on her. She was floating in a haze of love and desire that only Buffy had ever been able to bring her to. The fire that had been flowing so hotly through her veins just kept getting hotter. Buffy was touching her with such delicacy, such tenderness, such gentleness and it created in her a flame of desire that was higher than anything before it and the only thing she was capable of saying was the soft whisper of Buffy's name over and over again. The steady flow of love that came to her from Buffy through their bond brought her even higher. Bringing her closer to the peak at the top of the long climb and when she reached the zenith and fell over the sheer edge, she felt Buffy there with her, holding her hand, keeping her safe, then raising her up once more to the top and taking her over the edge again and then yet again.

Buffy crawled back up on the bed and pulled Faith still trembling with her into the center of the bed. She held Faith until the trembling ceased and her body relaxed, she scooted down a little and gently pulled off Faith's boots and torn jeans. She scooted back up and pulled Faith back within the circle of her arms, they curled up into each other and Faith placed tender, light kisses all over her face, murmuring in-between them her love and Buffy returned Faith's kisses and the love until they both drifted off to sleep.

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"Make it stop... please baby..." came Buffy's muffled plea from somewhere under the blankets.

Faith who was still half-asleep, despite the nonstop shrieking of the alarm clock for the last ten minutes, reached her hand out from under the blankets. She blindly searched for something to throw at the clock, finally she seized upon a pillow. She started to fling the pillow out to the side then remembered at the last second that they were laying the wrong way in the bed, their heads where their feet should be, their feet where their heads should be. She changed her angle and threw the pillow in the general direction of the clock with every ounce of Slayer strength she could muster after last night and a little over an hour's sleep. It was only because of blind luck that she managed to nail the clock dead on. She smiled widely and purred in satisfaction as the alarm blared one last time before the clock crashed to the floor.

"I slayed the evil clock-dragon for you princess..." Faith boasted in a soft voice.

"My hero..." Buffy mumbled, her breath softly caressing Faith's wiry curls that at this moment were tickling her nose.

She was lying on her stomach between Faith's legs, her head resting right above Faith's sex. One arm wrapped around Faith's thigh, the other arm lay across Faith's torso, her hand gently cupping one of Faith's breasts. She idly, gently started stroking Faith's nipple as it woke beneath her hand. She blew warm air lightly over Faith's curls again and then it was Buffy's turn to smile in satisfaction as Faith's hips twitched a little from the caress of her breath and the sound of Faith's soft purring changed to a tune of another kind.

"Hmmm... Do I get a morning kiss for being your hero, Giz?" Her eyes still closed, parts of her body half-asleep, other parts wide-awake. She stroked Buffy's hair with one hand and laid the other over the top of the hand Buffy was lazily teasing her nipple with.

"Always..." Buffy murmured back, she dipped her head down slowly and placed a gentle kiss on Faith's sleeping nub and then started to crawl up Faith's body.

She lifted herself up using her elbows, making a tent over them with the blankets and looked into Faith's sleepy eyes. She leaned down towards her and whispered a Morning S.O., before she gave Faith one of those light as air morning kisses that always devastated them both.

Neither could ever imagine not waking up and sharing one or a hundred of these kisses with the other in the morning. They were special to both of the Slayers for all the same reasons. Buffy had been the first and only person to ever bestow a morning kiss on Faith and it wasn't until later that Faith had told her that one of her secret wishes had always been that she would share this type of kiss with Buffy. It gave Buffy that totally clichéd warm fuzzy feeling to know that she had given to Faith a gift, made a wish come true that all the money in the world could never buy and though Faith would never admit it out loud to anyone, she got that same warm fuzzy feeling herself.

Buffy let Faith pull her down to her after they finished kissing good morning. She rested her head on Faith's shoulder and buried her nose into Faith's hair and neck, a spot that was one of her favorite places to be. She planted little just-because kisses all over the side of Faith's neck. Her left hand softly scratched along Faith's shoulder, down her arm, loving the sound of Faith purring like a contented cat. Buffy started purring contently herself as she felt Faith returning the light scratching down the expanse of her back.

"I don't wanna get up..." Buffy pouted out to Faith between kisses, "Can't we pretend to be sick?"

"Okay with me Giz." Faith wasn't about to argue with Buffy, she didn't want to get up either.

"What should we tell them is wrong with us, Fai? Gotta be something good since Slayers' don't normally get sick."

Faith didn't have to see Buffy's face to know that her brows were furrowed and her bottom lip was jutting out as she contemplated what story to make up to tell the Immortals.

"I can't think of anything that they'll believe," Buffy pouted as she rolled back on top of Faith, supporting herself once again on her elbows. She stared down into Faith's amused eyes and gave Faith her best puppy dog eyes. "You think of something baby. Pleeeeaaasssseeee..."

"Well... I suppose we could always tell them we're in Slayer Heat!" Faith wiggled her eyebrows at Buffy, while leering at her through half closed lids.

"You're so bad..."

"That's not what you kept telling me all last night. Let's see... oh yeah... So good, so good, baby you're so good! Gods! Don't stop!... The best..."

"Really? I don't remember me saying that. I remember you saying that to me though. That is when you weren't just outright screaming, praising my name in ecstasy like it was the only word you knew." Buffy couldn't help but to tease Faith back.

"I was just practicing my pronunciation of the letter B, B!"

"Liar..."

"Am not..."

"Are too!"

"Not!" Faith couldn't resist smirking up into Buffy's impish face.

Buffy sat up straddling Faith's waist, the blankets falling off her, "Aren't... Holy shit!" Her eyes opened wide when she got a good look at the room.

"What?" Faith sat up, the first thing she saw was the bent brass headboard and her mouth dropped open in amazement.

"What?" Buffy asked when she saw the look on Faith's face.

"You.. you ah... You killed it. You killed the headboard B!" Amusement clearly evident in Faith's tone and her eyes were sparkling wickedly when she remember what they were doing when the headboard got bent out of shape.

Buffy turned around, her face turning beat red when she saw the mangled headboard. She looked back at Faith and turned even redder at the sensual look Faith was giving her.

"Well... ah... I couldn't help myself... It's all your fault Faith." She fumbled out, "'Sides if I remember correctly..." Buffy turned to look across the room at the recliner by the fireplace. "I'm not the only one who killed the furniture. You not only ripped the arm of the recliner off, but you managed to break the footrest too..."

"If you hadn't teased me mercilessly for days I would have never... um..."

"Never what Fai?" Buffy asked her seductively, knowing exactly what had happened.

"I would never have lost all my control when youfinallyafteraneternityletmecome..." Faith mumbled out below a whisper in a heated rush, trailing off as she started blushing so hard she thought her head was going to pop. She looked up shyly at Buffy, ridiculous as it was to be feeling shy and received a glowing beautiful smile from her. And she gave Buffy a beautiful, shy smile in return.

They both quickly scanned the room, which looked like it had been hit with a series of natural disasters one right after the other, from a tornado to a hurricane to a meteor crash. There were books scattered all over the floor and if the bookshelves hadn't been part of the wall they probably would have fallen over too. Both reading chairs were tipped over, the freestanding lamps were on their sides on the floor, one of them was snapped in half. All of the oriental throw rugs where in completely different spots on the floor. The curtains on one of the windows hung haphazardly off its broken rod. The recliner was wrecked, the arm snapped off and on the floor, holes in the leather where Faith's fingers ripped through it and the footrest was hanging half drunkenly off the bottom of the chair by one bracket. The chaise lounge seemed to be in one piece even if it was in the middle of the room upside down.

They looked back at each other, both blushing now and started giggling like three-year-olds. They were almost afraid to get up and go see what they had done to the bathroom and the kitchen.

"We're gonna end up spending our last two days here fixin' everything." Faith grumbled as they got up out of the bed.

"Who cares it was worth it... Way worth it..." Buffy leaned in and gave Faith what started out as a gentle tender kiss and ended up almost making both of them crumble into ash.

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Two days later, Buffy spent most of their last full day within the Immortals domain watching Faith covertly. Faith was up to something, Buffy just knew it and she had pulled Lilith, Mars, Clotho and Buffy suspected even Lily into her little conspiracy. Had Buffy been another kind of person she would have been sneaking around in the bond they shared trying to find what it was that Faith was hiding from her. But she wasn't that kind of person, it would be an invasion of privacy or rather a virtual rape of Faith's mind and there was no way in hell that Buffy would ever do something like that to Faith.

It was kind of cute, even if it was frustrating. Since they had gotten up this morning Faith had stumbled, fumbled and stuttered over almost every word she had spoken. Buffy caught Faith sneaking peeks at her constantly and she was being extremely shy. Nor did Buffy miss that each time Faith exchanged a secretive look with one of the Immortals during the course of the day she blushed. Buffy had butterflies in her stomach all day just imagining what it was that Faith had planned for them. With each blush, each look, each flustered word, each whispered conversation Faith had and each touch, each kiss Faith bestowed upon her, Buffy fell just that little bit more in love with Faith. And each time she looked at Faith during the course of the day the only thing she could think, to steal Faith's standard retort, 'Yeah B, fucking adorable, that's me,' was that she couldn't agree more; Faith was absolutely fucking adorable!

She sighed a little, pouted a little, but deep down inside she was just plain old jumping up and down in anticipation. Joy and a whole myriad of other feelings streaking through her and she almost felt like a teenager who had fallen in love for the first time. That was the thing though, wasn't it? She had done the whole falling in love, dating, relationship thing before, but Faith never had. So it was all new to Faith and because of their bond, but mostly because it was Faith, she was experiencing it all as if it were truly the first time for her as well. She felt like a part of her innocence, her youth, had been given back to her. She relished the feelings, coveted them and wrapped them around her like a warm woolen coat. For the most part in the last few weeks, they had both discovered together what it was to be young, carefree, spontaneous, almost innocent and Buffy's only wish was that they would not lose it all, more for Faith's sake then her own when they returned to Sunnydale on the morrow.

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Faith was a nervous wreck; she wanted everything to be perfect. She mentally shook her head; she needed to get a grip, hell she needed to be able to get a word out without stuttering! The most complete sentence she had managed to say since getting up this morning was; 'Good morning, Giz.' What was it about Buffy that made her feel so shy, so nervous, so damn young, so out of control? She wanted in the most desperate way for their last night here to be special for Buffy. Wanted Buffy to keep this memory, their time here, despite all the anguish, the pain they had dealt with here, close to her heart. She was further determined that they would lose nothing of what they had found here with each other when they returned to Sunnydale and their lives as Slayers.

She had spent most of the last four hours during their training session with the Immortals, on her ass. She was knocked down, disarmed and thrown across the room more times today then she had the whole time they had been here. Mars' found it hilarious and spent the day mercilessly teasing her every chance he got when Buffy was out of earshot and he was taking every opportunity to knock her on her butt because of how distracted she was. You would think he would take it easy on her, considering he was part of the conspiracy and knew what was going on! She silently swore to herself as she picked herself off the floor once again, that she was going to kick his ass from here to his namesake in Earth's solar system as soon as she got her shit together again.

She turned around to face him once she was standing. He was giving her one of his little smirks, his eyebrow raised and his eyes sparkling with amusement. She gave him her best glare in return and he outright laughed at her then the amusement faded from his eyes and they grew serious.

"Come take a walk with me Slayer." Mars' commanded, in full-scale Incarnate of War mode.

"Hey what's going on?" Buffy yelled across the room as she saw Faith and Mars' making their way out of the training center.

"Faith and I are going for a little walk to have a chat about her performance today. It is not for you to worry about, we'll be back shortly." Mars' tone left no room for argument and Buffy knew the little walk he was taking Faith on had nothing whatsoever to do with whatever it was Faith and the Immortals were planning.

She felt a little sympathy for Faith, she knew how much Faith, how much both of them looked up to the Incarnate of War. They both had a little bit of hero worship going on where he was concerned and though Faith had never said anything, Buffy had the feeling that Faith looked to him as more like the father she never had and Buffy had a sneaky suspicion that Mars' looked at Faith as the daughter, child he never had. Buffy waved goodbye to Faith, flashed an understanding smile and got a small smile in return.

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They strolled down to the lake, Faith waited patiently for Mars' to begin talking. He stood with his back to her, staring out over the blue landscape of the lake, his hands clasped behind his back, his stance almost regal. He radiated a dangerous air, a commanding presence and Faith knew that right now the man standing in front of her wasn't her friend, her family, her mentor, but the Incarnate of War. This was a man who was used to his orders, commands, being followed without question, a man of power, a man whose justice was swift, but fair. Yet, there was still an air of compassion about him, an air that spoke of doing the right thing. A man who valued life above all else and would only take one as a last resort. He had on what he laughing referred to as his Command, his Incarnate of War mask.

If she was honest with herself, she felt a little intimidated by him right now. Unconsciously she mimicked his pose and unknowingly her face was impassive, her eyes hard, but compassionate, like his and she radiated the same air as he did.

"Did Buffy tell you that she and I spoke privately the day after the Little One blew up?" Mars' asked Faith, still with his back turned.

"Yes," Faith told him, wondering what this had to do with her performance or lack of it today.

"Did she tell you what we spoke of?" Still he did not turn around.

"Yes. But what does this hav..." Faith trailed off when he raised his hand for her to stop. She noticed that his speech was very formal and his tone even, unemotional, calm.

Buffy had come to him with her fears over her reaction to what had happened that day with Dawn. Her fear of the darkness inside of her, the rage she now carried with her from what had happened to both she and Faith and her inability to let it go, or control it. She was afraid of hurting someone, terrified because she knew that a few short weeks ago, she would have struck out regardless of the consequences. She had done it once before, even before she carried this rage inside of her, when the darkness, the power inside of her had allowed her to put a knife into the woman who was her soul-mate.

He had been waiting for Buffy to come to him, he knew this type of rage, darkness, intimately himself. What she didn't realize was that the dark side of her personality had always been with her, envy, hate, jealousy were all attributes of that darkness. That every person whether mortal or Immortal carried within both dark and light sides to their souls. That their life experiences, the core of who they were was what tipped the scales, gave life to one side or the other. More so for her and Faith then others because they were Slayers, the potential to just do whatever they felt like was always there, the temptation to put themselves above others, to think themselves better, superior and arbitrarily ignore what was right and wrong. The saying, absolute power corrupts absolutely, was one of the truest ever spoken and the Slayers had that power.

"Tell me, since you have your own experiences with the darkness, the rage to draw upon, what happens when you fight in that kind of rage?" Mars' asked her, forcing her to remember her own dark side, her own rage. He hated asking her but this was important to both the Slayers and to him as well.

"There is only the kill. Only the need to inflict pain. There is no control, no reason. It is powerful, addictive, and can be all-consuming. It can destroy you and those around you. There is just the haze and the only thing you know is what is in front of you." Faith paused, her thoughts jumbled and she searched for a way to express what it was like in that dark-haze. "There is no thought of consequences or others. It can get you killed; it makes you unaware of anything that is going on around you once the darkness controls you."

"So tell me what would have happened if you and Buffy were out Slaying today and you performed the way you did, got hurt and Buffy went into a rage?"

She already knew the answer she had seen Buffy in that type of rage before, the night she had gotten hurt in the cemetery. Had she fallen unconscious both she and Buffy would be dead, only her warning had let Buffy know another vampire was sneaking up behind her. The only thing Buffy had seen, had known that night was the vampire she was pummeling, beating viciously because he had hurt her, Faith. Giles had known it and Faith had known it for what it was. She because she had let the darkness, the rage control her for a good long while and Giles' from his days as Ripper when the darkness, the rage had almost consumed him.

"Had we been Slaying there would have been a good chance that both of us would have ended up dead." Faith understood what he was getting at now. Now more than ever she needed to focus, needed to be when she was Slaying, just the Slayer. Distractions were not an option and in reality when she, they were Slaying they never could be. She had learned that self-discipline from Angel and was being re-taught it again by the Immortals. "I understand now."

"Do you?" Mars asked finally turning around; he leveled his gaze at her and waited for her answer.

"Yes. Now more than ever I can't afford to be distracted. Can't afford to have Buffy give into the darkness. Especially now when it has the chance to own her, like it did me once. Neither of us can afford to be distracted by what is going on in our lives while we are Slaying. And not just now. We can't afford it ever. We are over protective of each other and it more than anything can get us killed. It doesn't mean to ignore the other, or be unaware of them. It just means our best option for surviving, staying alive, is if we do what we were born to do without the outside interference of our daily lives. We need to trust each other to take care of ourselves when we are Slaying."

"And did you do that today?" Mars asked her, quirking an eyebrow.

"No and had all of you not taken it easy on me today and had actually hurt me, Buffy would have lost it on you. That's why, you've been training us separately when there is the possibility that one of us may become injured during training. Isn't it?"

"Faith..." Mars' tone softened, as did the expression on his face. "It is not an easy task to put aside the feelings you have for those you are fighting with and just be 'The Slayer'. Not easy to put out of your mind all the distractions, because they are not really distractions at all, they are your life with your mate. They are a part of you, of her. And right now Buffy needs you to be at your best. She has taken the first step in gaining control of the rage, the darkness by coming to us with this. But that control only extends to her personal life and your friends or rather family. I doubt that she will be able to control it while you two are slaying. You can help her with this, just as Angel helped you, in fact I am relying on you to be the one to guide her through this. She will listen to you more than she will listen to anyone else. I know with absolute certainty that you will guide her safely through this."

Faith watched his face, she knew now that this talk was about more than just her performance today. He was worried about both of them, once they left here, they would be risking their lives on a daily basis again. They all knew that the time was coming that led to the End of Days and that things on the supernatural front would be getting increasingly worse, instead of better.

"I won't fail you or Buffy." Faith solemnly promised him, then murmured low, "Or myself."

"I know you won't Faith." He moved closer to her, he grabbed both of her hands and clasped them within his own.

As she looked up at him, she saw once again the man who was her friend, the man who she thought of as a father, looking back at her.

"You and Buffy, in my heart, are my family. There is much about me you do not know, but you and I are a lot alike. How we think, react, love, who we are on the inside. I too struggled like you with the darkness and like you won against it. While both you and Buffy hold a place in my heart, you, Faith are special to me. In my heart you are the daughter I never had and I couldn't be more proud of you if you were of my own flesh and blood." He stopped for the barest of seconds; he was not a man of many words, nor one to allow this side of himself out around people. He was as he said much like Faith in this way. They both hid the sensitive, big-hearted, gentle, loyal, loving people they were behind the gruff, sarcastic mask they presented to the rest of the world. He cleared his throat then continued, "It has been my privilege and honor to be your and Buffy's trainer and it will continue to be my privilege and honor to continue both your training when you leave here tomorrow. You have both made me extremely proud."

His Incarnate of War mask came back up and he turned to go back to the training center. He stopped at Faith's gentle touch upon his arm. He turned back to face her and try as he might he could not hide the love he felt for this woman standing in front of him that he would forever think of as his daughter.

"Thank you," Faith told him softly.

She didn't know how it had happened, but over the course of her time here she had forged a bond with him. Beginning when she realized how protective he was of both she and Buffy. It had solidified and grown when she had seen the tears he had shed when Lilith and Clotho had told him all that had happened to her and Buffy when they were held captive. He did not know that she had seen him and she would never tell him that she did. The magnitude of the anger and grief he had displayed after the two Immortals had told him the tale boggled her mind. Since that time, he had done everything in his power to draw them both out and her especially. In his own way helping her to deal with what had happened not just in Slayer Hell but when she was a child as well. She had found in him what she had been looking for in the Mayor, she had found in him the father she never had.

"The honor is mine. You have done more for me and Buffy than I can ever hope to thank you or show you my gratitude for. I'm not good at this stuff but... In my heart you are the Father I've never had. It is my privilege, my honor, that you think of me as your daughter. And you are the only man I've ever known who has deserved, who I would be proud to call my Father."

They stared at each other than Mars' pulled her into a tight hug which Faith returned with everything she was. He stroked her hair then placed a gentle kiss upon her forehead. They separated and he once again had his Incarnate of War face on, though his eyes sparkled with mischief and love. She put on her best Slayer face and stared back at him, a tiny smirk playing around her mouth.

Mars' threw his arm around her shoulder, "What say you then Infant, shall we rejoin the others?"

"Whatever you say old man!"

"Old man, I'll show you just how old I am when we get back. Hell Grasshopper, you haven't even begun to see what I can do..." He laughed a deep rumbling laugh that came from his belly.

"Whatever Candyman..." And Faith laughed with him as they made their way back to the others.

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They had been at their cottage for less than five minutes, Lilith and Clotho having joined them, when Clotho made some lame excuse about needing to go get some new thread for the Tapestry of Life and asked Buffy to go with her to help pick out the colors. That was when Buffy knew with absolute certainty that something was up and that Faith had definitely enlisted the Immortals help with whatever she had planned. She had almost said no to Clotho and then she caught the panicked look on Faith's face out of the corner of her eye and heard the soft moan of defeat come from her. Obviously, they needed her out of the way to finish or accomplish whatever it was Faith had planned and Faith seemed to think that Clotho had just blown it for her. Buffy didn't have the heart to even teasingly say no to Clotho. This, whatever this was, clearly meant a great deal to Faith and Buffy didn't want to ruin it for her.

"Sure why not. You don't mind if I go with Clotho, do you baby?" Buffy walked over to Faith and placed her hands lightly on her waist.

She watched as the relief and the joy washed over the Dark Slayer's face. It made her fall that much more in love with her.

"Nah B... Go ahead... I'll miss you though." Faith almost sighed out loud in relief when she actually managed to get the words out without stuttering. She almost had a heart attack when Clotho had uttered the lamest excuse ever to have been said since man first spoke to get someone out of the house! Especially since, if Buffy had thought about it, she would have remembered that Clotho actually spun the Threads of Life from raw silk, so there wasn't a need to go get any! Then again, had Faith not been so nervous, she would have realized that Buffy was playing along because she loved her and didn't want to ruin anything.

"I'll miss you too." Buffy leaned into Faith and gave her a sweet, tender kiss. When she pulled back, she was stunned once again by that wide-eyed awed look that Faith sometimes got. And Buffy fell just a little bit more in love with Faith.

"Ready?" Clotho asked Buffy, who just nodded and then with a wave of her hand they faded from the cottage.

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As everything started to come into to focus, though still flickering a little, Buffy realized Clotho had faded her into the bathroom of the cottage she shared with Faith. After a second, she realized that the flickering was from the numerous scented candles that were lit throughout the bathroom, casting it in a low, shadowy sensuous light. The tub was already full, the jets on and the smell of jasmine scented the air as it rose with the steam from the bath water. She smiled softly and looked quickly around to see where Faith was hiding.

"Faith?" She called out. "Faith!" She called again a little louder. Still no response, she turned around intending to go in search of Faith and saw the note hanging on the door.

'Giz,

I hope you like the first part of my plans for you, for us, tonight. So take your time and just enjoy the bath. Your clothes for tonight are on the bed. When you're ready just go outside, Sol will be waiting outside for you, she knows where to go, I'll be there waiting for you.

Love your,
S.O.
(Don't worry about the candles or anything else. Gran and Kiddo got them covered...)'

Another soft smile graced her face; she quickly stripped out of her clothes and climbed into the bath. The temperature of the water was perfect then again, she had no doubts that it would be, Faith would know exactly how she liked the water in her bath, it was one of the little things that made Faith, Faith. No one, not even Angel had paid attention to the things that Buffy liked the way Faith did. It was just one of the things on the ever-growing list of things that made Buffy love Faith even more. She leaned her head back with a grateful sigh. She lingered only a short while in the bath, it wasn't quite as much fun taking one alone. Besides, who did she think she was kidding, she missed Faith and she was eager to see her.

She padded naked out into the main room over to the bed. She looked down at the new clothes Faith had gotten for her. Everything, from the satin g-string, matching bra, to the sleeveless silk shirt with the plunging neckline, to the soft leather pants were blood red. The deepest, darkest blood red that Buffy had ever seen, the red was so dark it bordered on black. She moaned a little with pleasure as she slipped on the satin g-string and bra, another moan escaped her as she pulled the silk shirt over her head, loving the feel of it against her skin. She picked up the leather pants and they felt like butter in her hands they were so soft and they felt even softer against her skin, as she slid them on another moan of pleasure escaped her. She buttoned them up quickly, liking how they rode low on her hips. She pulled on the socks Faith had laid out and put on the new pair of black platform boots that were on the floor by the bed.

Everything fit her perfectly, not surprised at all that Faith had been able to pick out clothes that would hug and fit her in all the right places and in all the right ways.

She went back into the outer part of the bathroom to put on her makeup and do her hair. She took her time, applying colors that would bring out the gold in her eyes. She left her hair straight and long, and then sprayed herself liberally with the Armani perfume that Faith loved on her.

She took one last look at herself in the mirror and couldn't help think that the clothes Faith had picked out for her made her feel sexy and beautiful all at once. She walked out the front door and sure enough, Sol was waiting patiently there for her.

She climbed up onto the horse's back and leaned down over the mare's neck and whispered into her ear, "Sol, take me to my heart..."

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Buffy enjoyed the leisurely gait of the horse as Sol strolled lazily to their destination. Her thoughts drifted back to the last time she had been on the back of a horse, Obsidian's to be exact, and her whole body flushed just thinking about what she and Faith had done on him. She swore that Obsidian had been smirking at her for the last two days.

"So, this must be the part that Lily played in Faith's plans." Sol just nickered at Buffy in confusion. "This. Telling you, making you understand where to take me. I wonder what part the rest of them played. Do you know Sol?"

This time Sol just brayed at Buffy, tossed her head and hoped that Buffy understood that this was her equivalent of a human shrugging their shoulders.

"You're not gonna tell me, are you? You wouldn't tell me even if you could. Would you, Sol?" Buffy paused in her babbling when Sol brayed and shook her head at her again. "That's all right I really don't want to know anyway. I want to be surprised, you know. Faith's was so cute today, all shy and blushing. I love her a lot but you probably know that. She's... I don't even know how to describe what she is to me, what she means to me. I don't think there are any words that can, any words that could come close. All I know is that I could sooner stop needing air before I stopped loving or needing her... You know and..."

Buffy stopped babbling when she saw that they were leaving the property that surrounded her and Faith's cottage. Sol walked for a while on the path that ran between all the cottages in the direction that led to Atropos and Luc's cottage. Just when Buffy was beginning to think that was their destination, the mare turned off onto a trail on the left. A trail that Buffy couldn't remember ever seeing in all their time here. A trail, Buffy, in fact, knew wasn't there this morning, when she and Faith walked over to have breakfast with Atropos and Luc.

"Hey this trail wasn't here this morning. Why wasn't it here this morning?" Buffy gently stroked Sol's long neck, not really expecting the mare to answer her.

She wondered where Sol was taking her because it looked like the trail ended only a few feet ahead of them at a very large, grand, old oak tree. All she could see was a solid wall of trees, so close that their main trunks seemed to brush against each other. Where seconds before there had been no path between the trees now there was one and then they were inside the thick forest. The canopy of trees almost obliterated the dark blue sky above. The twin moons, one a soft cobalt blue, the other a soft gold, cast filtered light down and created dark shadows on the trunks of the trees and the lush thick green grass of the forest floor. Buffy looked up in awe as they moved deeper into the thicket of the forest. The trees seemed to touch the sky, as if the branches were reaching up, so the leaves upon them could bathe in the light of the twin moons. They seemed to shimmer and glow, ranging in the deepest, darkest greens, browns, oranges, and yellows Buffy had ever seen.

Thick woody vines grew along the canopy of the trees, some as thick as her body. Flowers grew on the vines, orchids, mosses, and another type that Buffy didn't recognize. The flowers were a brilliant, vibrant rainbow of different colors and some of the most beautiful flowers Buffy had ever seen. They almost made her catch her breath.

They suddenly emerged from the forest and Buffy's breath did catch at the beauty of the clearing in front of her. It was a rather large clearing and the grass here was even thicker, it looked like a sea of deep green velvet. She slid from Sol's back and she could feel the softness of the grass even through her platform boots, she took a few steps forward and it felt like she was walking on clouds.

She heard a roaring in her ears and at first thought it was the pounding of her heart, when she realized what it was she turned her head to the right. Her eyes saw the sheer rock face first then moved to the sparkling waterfall pouring over from its top. It cascaded down the rock face with fury, pounding into the clear blue lake, creating white-capped waves in the crystalline water below. She saw steam rising from the sapphire water a little to the left and realized it was a hot-spring. Only instead of the sulfuric smell that hot-springs usually gave off, this one smelled how the earth smelled after it rained on a hot summer day, musky, deep, erotic. It was exotic, passionate, stimulating. It was alive. No one had to tell Buffy that this place was enchanted.

She looked around quickly. The clearing was completely enclosed on three sides by a thick blanket of trees, the fourth side by the mountain with the beautiful waterfall. She didn't see Faith anywhere, but she could feel her and knew she wasn't far. She walked further into the clearing towards the large blanket on the ground. A picnic basket that was the size of a rather large hope chest, sat on the blanket. There was a low wood table on the blanket and large soft looking pillows were scattered upon it, a fire was off to one side in a natural earthen hearth, casting flickering shadows across the light brown blanket. And Buffy was reminded of the night at the Mansion that she and Faith had made love for the first time.

She took off her boots and socks wanting to feel the grass beneath her bare feet. She rubbed them on the lush grass, squished her toes into the warmth of the ground and sighed with unadulterated pleasure. As she walked the few steps to the blanket in her bare feet she really began to believe that she was walking on clouds.

She stepped onto the blanket and then stopped when she realized she probably should have wiped off her feet first. She stepped back off the blanket, lifted up a foot and was surprised to see that her feet were clean despite the fact that she had dug her toes into the warm moist earth. She laughed, she should have known better. She walked across the blanket and made herself comfortable against the large pillows. They were as soft as they looked. She noticed next to the picnic basket two wine glasses and a bottle of Merlot. Then her eyes grew wide when she saw the black box and envelope with a rather large 'B' written in Faith's handwriting next to the wine bottle.

She scrambled across the blanket and grabbed the envelope and the box. She scooted back and made herself comfortable against the pillows once again. She opened the envelope and pulled out the card. The front of the card had a pastel drawing of the sun rising over a beach. She opened the card and began to read.

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'B,

The first time I wrote this card was at the mansion. You were sleeping in the bed, you looked so innocent, so peaceful, so beautiful that I forgot how to breathe. I sat there for hours watching you sleep, listening to your deep even breathing and tried to convince myself I wasn't dreaming. I can't even remember now how many times I had whispered to you that I loved you that night, wanting more than anything to say those three little words to you while you were awake. I was afraid though and you, god, you understood that and I will be forever grateful that you waited for me to find the courage to tell you that I love you. I spent that night trying so hard to figure out how to even put into words on the piece of paper I sat clutching in my sweating hands what I could not say to you out loud. How to tell you all the things you were to me, all the things I was learning from you, with you. All the things you had given to me. All the things I longed to have with you, give to you. All my dreams, all my secrets. How even then you were making them come true, one by one. How every day you made another wish, another dream come true. I can only hope that someday I can do the same for you. And now, I can't even begin to express what I feel for you, what you've given me. I'm not good with words, with expressing myself, I never was. All I can say is that I am eternally grateful that you always hear what it is that I am trying to say and not just the words. The night I first wrote this I decided to use a poem I had found while I was in prison. The poem spoke to a part of me that I had tried to keep hidden for as long as I could remember and more than anything I wanted to share with someone all of the things that are in the poem. And day by day even only those few short weeks after we were together you started giving them all to me, I only hope that I give them all to you too. So I decided now, like then, to let the poem speak for me.'

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Do you always trust your first initial feeling
Special knowledge holds truth bears believing
I turned around
And the water was closing all around
Like a glove
– Stevie Nicks

Promises

i sit upon the moonlit shore, watching and listening to the earth as she breathes
the gentle beating of her heartbeat lulls me
softly she calls to me whispered promises in the dark
her breath caressing and cradling me
and i lay back upon the beach giving myself over to her embrace
to sleep, to dream
and here now, in this place, she shares with me the secrets she keeps, and reminds me of the knowledge i keep
and she reawakens in me the meaning of intimacy and of love

intimacy
is the wooing, the romance, the first baby steps towards giving someone your trust...
it is the laughter, the fumbling, the knowing what to say, it is the right music without any sound…
it is the whisper of touches, the warmth of another presence, the moment affixed right where it should be…
it is the kiss that carries more than just passion...
it is soft and revealing….
it is rejoicing in the brushing of one's skin with just a glance, which means more to you than anything else just then…
it is communicating without a word..
it is comfortable silences, it is knowing each other's moods without having to ask..
it is the comfort of another's arms...
it is knowing intimacy doesn't guarantee love, but rather carries with it the promise of love...

love
is honest, nurturing, frightening, exhilarating, confusing, enlightening but, most of all beautiful…
it is emerging from the darkness, knowing that you have shielded what you have created for one another...
it is honor, it is passionate, in every sense…
it is natural...
it is the opening of heart, mind, body and soul to another...
it is total vulnerability...
it is fragile, innocent, it is the most precious gift we can give to another...
it is independence...
it is forgiving…
it is perfect, even if those experiencing it are not…
it is both simple and complicated at once…
it is the absence of secrets...
it is the ability to see what lies beneath the surface of another and resides within their soul…
it is the freedom to choose...
it is acceptance, it is supportive in one's own right…
it is ever changing, and knowing with that change comes growth…
it is autumn, it is vision and silent conversations…
it is making love with only a glance and not a touch...
it is those moments when your eyes meet and time seems to stand still, and the rest of the world ceases to exist...
it is unconditional…
it is knowing love doesn't guarantee intimacy, but rather carries with it the promise of intimacy...
it is knowing that they are intertwined and independent...

it is this inner knowledge that i possess that she reminds me of
and as i wake to the rising sun, there is a promise that she makes to me...
if i will simply open myself to the world around me, and to my own inner self...
it is all within my reach...

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The promise B, that she made to me that if I opened myself to the world and to myself, that it would all be within my reach came true. That promise was fulfilled by you. You are all those things to me, I feel all those things when I am with you. Every one of them, every day. Each day I fall further in love with you and I don't ever want to stop falling. I want to fall for eternity with you. I am now, like I was then amazed, awed, humbled and so honored that it is me that you choose to be with, choose to love. The gift is just a small expression of what I feel for you, it is unique, special, just like you.

I love you B, I will past my last breath, past the end of time, and that is my promise to you. You are my heart and my soul.

Faith

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Buffy stared at the card in her trembling hands, her mind a whirlwind, no one had ever said, wrote such beautiful words to her. She didn't even realize she was crying until she saw the teardrops splash silently on the card. Her whole being was humming with the love that she felt for Faith and she could feel the love Faith felt for her flow through their bond to her. It flowed through every part of her, it was a part of her, just like Faith was and she hoped that she never took for granted the bond they shared that allowed her, allowed both of them to actually, almost in a physical way, feel the emotions, the love of the other.

She looked up and then looked around again. She knew that Faith was somewhere out there watching her. She understood Faith's nervousness, the reasons why she had been acting so shy all day. A part of her was still a bit afraid of bearing her soul, of leaving herself so open and vulnerable. She felt traces of it still coming to her in an echo. She knew Faith probably wouldn't come out until after she had opened the box with the gift. She had to admit to herself that she was eager to see what it was that Faith could have gotten for her all that time ago.

She whispered softly into the quiet of the night air, knowing that Faith would hear her, "I love you Faith... Forever..."

She looked down and picked up the long black box, she ran her fingers lightly over it, then lifted off the top.

Her breath caught, her sight grew hazy and her mind spun as images flashed through it...

...Sitting in class with Willow and Xander her senior year in high school getting ready to take a chemistry test. Taking to Willow and Xander about what she and Faith had done the night before, remembering Xander asking her; 'Hey. Whoa, can we resume Buffy's ode to Faith later?' Growing quiet as Will and Xander actually started to take the test, she had been bored. Then she heard it, the soft tapping on the thick classroom window. Looking up seeing Faith there, smiling that lopsided cocky smile of hers, her nose pressed against the windowpane. That smile had made her heart start racing a million miles a minute, just like it did now. Faith opening the window and asking her; 'Hey girlfriend. Bad time?' Faith leaning over to the closed window, blowing her hot breath on the pane, steaming it up. She smiled again then drew a cute little crooked heart with a stake through it on the fogged windowpane. Smiling at her once again with that cocky little smile, arching an eyebrow and her own heart had tried to beat its way out of her chest at the sight. She had gotten up from her desk, moving towards Faith and the window as if being pulled by an invisible thread to her, ignoring Willow and Xander's protests. Taking Faith's hand as she helped her through the window, the little tingle she had felt as Faith's warm hand held hers. She remembered thinking that with her, with Faith, was where she belonged...

...The memory the images from that day faded and others took their place in her mind's eye...

The fair, Faith's first ever. Faith's mission that night, to win every single stuffed animal for her after she had said how cute they all were. How Faith had given all the stuffed animals away to little kids, when she had told her they couldn't all possibly fit in the car. How young, how innocent, carefree, Faith had seemed that day. It was her first real glimpse into who Faith really was deep down inside, who Faith had always been. How she had refused to let Faith give away the black and white stuffed panthers. The tickle fight that had ensued between her, Dawn and Faith when she refused to tell Faith why she wanted to keep the black and white stuffed panthers. Then the night at the Mansion the first time they had made love in front of the fireplace. Faith's glee, her excited voice, when she figured out why she had wanted to keep the panthers. 'They're us! Aren't they? They remind you of us, don't they B? The light and dark slayers, the light and dark panthers! I'm right aren't I? Aren't I B?' The goofy-ass grin Faith had on her face that night. She could see them, the stuffed panthers, sitting on the bed at the Mansion and now here with them at the cottage.

Her vision cleared again as the images the memories faded and she was staring at the gift that she now knew Faith had specially made for her. She ran her fingers delicately over the pendent on a silver chain that was nestled in the black silk that lined the box. Only the pendant was more like a miniature-framed etching. The frame was an antique hand-woven oval Celtic Knot. What was in the frame of the pendant though was what had made her breath catch. It was a miniature, etched on glass and then hand painted in exquisite detail. The painted etching was of two panthers cuddling, sleeping lovingly, trustingly against each other. One panther was golden-haired the other raven-haired and around both their necks was a long black beaded necklace. Hanging on each black necklace was a heart with a stake through it.

She ran her fingers delicately over the beautiful etching. She gently lifted the pendant out of the box. She opened the clasp with shaky fingers and brought it up to put around her neck.

"Here let me do that for you B..." Faith knelt down behind Buffy and captured her hands, tenderly taking the pendant from her. "Lift your hair for me. Please." She waited patiently for Buffy to lift her hair. She placed a soft kiss against the back of Buffy's neck then clasped the pendant around Buffy's neck.

Faith wrapped her arms around Buffy from behind. She rested her head on Buffy's shoulder and her voice trembled a little, she asked her softly, "Do you like it?"

Buffy gently loosened Faith's arms from around her so she could turn around and face her. She rose up to her knees and clasped both of Faith's warm, trembling hands within her own.

"It's... it's beautiful... Beautiful just like you... Beautiful in all the right ways, inside. And that letter, that poem, it was beautiful. Your words... God Faith, no one has ever said such beautiful, powerful, intense, passionate things to me. And all of those things, every last one of them you do for me. I feel all of them for you, all of them. I fall more in love with you every day. I don't ever want to stop falling either. And I want to fall for eternity with you too."

"Really?" Faith asked her hesitantly, shyly and even now after all this time, there were moments when she was afraid that she was going to wake up and it all would have been just a dream. A wonderful, exciting, loving, all consuming dream and if it was a dream she never wanted to wake up.

"Really Faith..." Buffy looked at Faith, who had lowered her eyes shyly. She hadn't missed the hesitant way she had asked her the question or the slight fear that crept into Faith's voice. "Look at me please." She waited until Faith raised those soulful eyes up to her own. She smiled a soft, sweet, loving smile when Faith finally looked at her. "Really. It's not a dream, it's real. What we have is more than I ever dreamed was possible. What I feel for you, the words 'I love you' don't even begin to encompass. I want to spend every second I have left in this life with you and I want to spend all of eternity after that with you. If this is a dream then I want never to wake from it. I want to stay forever in this dream with you."

When she finished, Faith gave her one of those blinding, brilliant, radiant smiles. It shone from inside of the Dark Slayer with the force of the sun and it left Buffy breathless, stunned and basking in its warmth. She returned Faith's smile with a brilliance that was all her own.

It was inevitable that they leaned in towards each other. Their lips whispering across the other's, their breath mingling, their hearts began beating to the same cadence. A small sound of recognition came from them both, as they kissed the other's soul and their arms surrounded each other, where they found shelter, acceptance, love and a place that for both of them would always be home.

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to be continued... (to see the pendant look at the cover art for the story)