Segment 4:
After the "Be My Baby" dance ends, Mr. Matthews, seeing everyone have a good time, and thinking he needs to remind them of the tragedy that is life, unexpectedly asks Disadvantaged Girl Maya to say a few words about 9/11 and the value of family, since she lost hers so, so tragically. Maya is taken aback, her cover story was too good, even her teacher believed it and he sees her tomfoolery on a daily basis! Unflappable, Maya walks to the microphone, center stage, and begins to speak, not nervous at all. She puts on a sad voice and tells the audience some vague details about this and that. Unbeknownst to her, one of the older men who wandered in off the street is Ginzo Pisano (to be played by Artie Lange), a former New York City firefighter. When he hears Maya say she lost her parents in the collapse of Building 7, he obnoxiously calls her out from the audience, saying no one died in the collapse. Farkle corrects him by saying, "Uh, controlled collapse, sir." Mr. Matthews tries to calmly shut the man up, not even considering that Maya is lying. However, Maya, offended, begins arguing with old Ginzo. Suddenly from the back of the room comes a shout. It turns out to be none other than Maya's father who has also wandered in off the street upon seeing the sign outside and was also dancing with one of Maya's classmates. He angrily reminds Maya and everyone listening that he wasn't killed in the collapse of Building 7 and neither was Maya's mother. The father is wearing a cut off flannel shirt, has tattooed arms, facial piercings, dyed hair, etc. Caught in a lie, Maya hangs her head ashamedly. Riley storms the stage and demands the truth from her, she's so hurt because she didn't know people lied and always thought they told the truth. Maya, on-stage into the microphone, confesses to lying about her parents. When she says no one died in Building 7, all of her classmates gasp, as they did not know that and still know nothing of 9/11. When she admits that her parents aren't dead, just losers, her father protests, "No, we're not!" Then tries to get the "digits" from the girl he was dancing with, who says she does not own a phone yet and not allowed to date older men. Maya concludes her confessional speech by saying you should always be honest, even if your parents are really losers. "Tell that to the government!" Farkle grunts with his arms crossed across his chest. Mr. Matthews, Maya, and Riley share a group hug and the audience "awwwwws" as Maya's dad leaves with the girl he was dancing with earlier. As they continue to hug, someone takes a piece of the layer cake on the snack/drink table and it collapses in on itself at free fall speed, Farkle gasps deeply at the sudden epiphany he has. The audience goes to pieces over this one.
Trivia: References include Girl Meets World, 9/11 conspiracy theories, Austin Powers, 9/11: The New Pearl Harbor, Phil Spector explaining Be My Baby, Burzum, Immortal Technique's song "Bin Laden," and an actual lesson a teacher of mine taught on 9/11.
-Some people from my middle school on 9/11 did think 9/11 was done by Russia or China
-On 9/11 I started writing a fan fiction where Russia does 9/11 and the US launches an immediate "Doolittle Raid" like response. The main character gets shot down and captured by Dr. Evil.
-Building 7 DID collapse at free fall speed