Chapter 4C: "Carpe Diem"
When he entered the Sickbay a minute late, Jim saw Spock looking at the door, almost like he knew he was about to come in. Freaky.
"Jim!" Spock sounded excited.
"Hey, Spock!" Jim smiled widely. "Did you manage to fix the Tricorder?"
"I was able to reconnect the correct wires. It seemed like someone cut the circuits in a careless manner."
Jim glared at Bones.
"What?" Bones asked, crossing his arms.
"Nothing," Jim sighed. He wasn't arguing about why his friend had damaged valuable equipment in front of Spock. He noticed Uhura standing near Spock, but at a safe distance, almost like she was afraid of the kid. "Uhura, can I talk to you for a moment?"
"Of course, Captain."
Why was everyone calling him Captain? It felt weird, he shouldn't get too used to it though, Spock would return to normal soon and he would be back to his post. It was bittersweet.
As Uhura walked towards Jim, he noticed that Spock was also getting close, probably thinking that he was invited to the conversation.
"We'll be right back, Spock," Jim said to emphasize that it was a private conversation.
"Are you leaving him here again?" Bones said in dismay.
"This will take only five minutes, Bones," Jim reassured him with a smile.
"That doesn't work with me, kid," Bones grumbled. "I'm not part of your fan club."
"You should be, it's an awesome club."
"Whatever, just don't take long or you know what could happen," warned Bones.
"I know, you can get creative next time I end up in Sickbay," Jim said, oddly resigned.
"That's right."
"Captain?" Uhura interrupted the discussion, knowing this could be endless.
"Right, let's go." Jim winked at Spock to reassure him that everything was fine, but he was surprised to see the tiny frown on Spock's face. He was glaring at him and Uhura; this was probably the first time Jim had seen Spock show an emotion he could label 'anger'.
He decided to analyze why Spock was angry at him later. He let Uhura pass and walked out of Sickbay, still feeling a pair of eyes staring firmly at his back.
Spock watched Jim disappear from the room, and it felt empty again. He had such an amazing presence; he could warm up any place he arrived in. It felt nice having a person like that close to you, although Spock had to take into account that others enjoyed Jim's presence as much as he did. He had a competitive nature, and he had to work twice as hard for everything because Vulcans never acknowledged his accomplishments. Compared to classmates who were fully Vulcan, Spock was always graded below them to avoid conflict, like it was Spock's fault that they were mediocre in a culture that was not tolerant of failure. This situation was piquing Spock's competitive side. He was angry when Jim entered Sickbay and immediately asked for Lieutenant Uhura, an attractive female. He knew it was illogical to feel this possessive of a human whom he had only met three hours and fifteen minutes ago; however, he could not avoid the heat rising to his cheeks and he had to prevent himself from saying something completely out of line. He wanted to make amends in case Jim was upset at him, and saying that the Lieutenant was a poor choice for a mate probably would not help the situation.
He did believe that, though he did not doubt that Lieutenant Uhura was intelligent and it could be said that she was attractive. Not as attractive as his mother, of course, but different to what he was accustomed to seeing. It was appealing; perhaps if he had met her before Jim he could think she was beautiful. Compared to Jim, she was not. He was truly fine-looking; Spock did not feel any shame in admitting that because Vulcans appreciated beauty in all its forms. Logically, the Lieutenant was not a suitable mate for Jim. Although Lieutenant Uhura surely possessed outstanding qualities and seemed like a noble person, Jim was exceptional and should have someone as unique as he was by his side. However, his mother had proved to him that sometimes humans' choices of mates were not exactly logical, but plagued by emotions; Jim's choice would probably be the same. Perhaps he was already involved with the Lieutenant in a romantic relationship.
This bothered Spock deeply, perhaps because he was Jim's friend. A friendship bond, according to his mother, meant that you desired the best for the person you cherished as such. Vulcans chose their mates rationally, which his father told him was the reason why he defied all the teachings of Vulcan culture and chose a human for his mate. Spock had never understood that; how could a human be a better suited mate for his father than a Vulcan? His mother had decided to embrace a different world because she loved his father, she had said this on many occasions; she was human, she was allowed to be weak and let emotions dominate her decisions. His father, however, did not have any reason to defy Vulcan tradition. There was a time when Spock thought his mother had kidnapped his father and demanded that he marry her in return for his release. Humans in love could do incredibly foolish things, he had read several documents that proved this. His mother clarified that she did not kidnap his father and felt hurt that Spock thought she had 'blackmailed his father into loving her', which led to Spock feeling guilty because he had made his mother upset. She did not understood Spock's need to comprehend the situation, she thought that saying that they married out of love was enough. Spock did not know what love meant. At least, not romantically, he loved his mother and perhaps he also had deep feelings for his father (he would not call it 'love'). But to challenge your culture… love must be a powerful feeling.
And if Jim was in love with the Lieutenant… Spock could not intervene even though he did not agree and thought that he deserved better. He should not hypothesize about Jim's romantic life; he had no solid information to verify his thoughts.
"Lieutenant Uhura is Jim's mate?" he asked brusquely, knowing all too well that he was acting irrationally. It did not stop him from voicing his thoughts.
Doctor McCoy turned around so fast that Spock thought he could have broken his neck.
"What?" he said with shock.
"I apologize, I did not mean to intrude," Spock said, trying to calm his voice. "I was wondering if Lieutenant Uhura is romantically involved with Jim."
"You don't mean to intrude but you keep asking, huh?" McCoy smirked. "Why do you care? Are you jealous?"
"I am certainly not jealous!" Spock said with force and realized that he had raised his voice.
"It's okay, kid." McCoy smiled widely. "Lieutenant Uhura is great; if anything, we can say you have fine taste in women. Let's hope you stick to that when you grow up."
As usual, humans came to the wrong conclusions based on common assumptions. Since he was a male, he must be interested in the only female he had met so far, and McCoy could not grasp that his negative feelings may be elicited on behalf of another male. No that he had any negative feelings, McCoy had just misinterpreted Spock's question. Jealousy was illogical.
He did not say anything further, to see if McCoy would decide to answer the question without any other unsolicited input.
The doctor seemed to notice his stare, since he lifted both eyebrows.
"He's not with Uhura, she's all yours," McCoy said finally. "But I think you're a little young for her. Wait a few years."
Spock inclined his head. If he were interested in the Lieutenant, as soon as he returned to his normal age he could pursue her. This was not the case, yet he could not help but wonder if it could be accomplished with Jim. In this situation there were factors like personal preferences for romantic relationships and human feelings to consider.
That was what Spock found both enchanting and frustrating about humans. Being able to display anything you felt must be liberating, but it was also problematic and shameful. He enjoyed it when his mother was emotional, he somehow felt that when she was angry on his behalf it was the closest he could come to being angry himself. It was the only weakness Spock could allow himself at such a young age.
"You're too young to be thinking about love anyway," McCoy added, waving his hand.
Too young to be thinking about love. It was contradictory; if love was a feeling, it should not be a thought, and since feelings exist at any age, then it should not have a certain limit.
"I was not aware that there was an age limit to feeling love," Spock said. He wanted to know more about McCoy's insight on the topic.
"Love is trouble. You're a kid, your main concerns should be eating right and sleeping. You'll have plenty of time to ruin your life with love in the future."
McCoy may be cynical, but he had a somewhat logical point. Love could ruin lives; his mother's love for his father had ruined his own in a way that they could not comprehend. Spock was grateful to have been born, he was intelligent, healthy and capable; he just would have liked his parents to consider his situation. His father, being fully Vulcan, would never feel the solitude and rejection he experienced; his mother, being fully human, would never realize the effort Spock had to make to contain himself and not 'let go' as she wanted him to. They were the ones who defied two cultures, and somehow Spock felt he was the one who was being punished for by having no sense of belonging.
As he listened to McCoy complaining about space shenanigans (he was surprised McCoy even knew the word), Spock wondered if perhaps his place was here, in the middle of nowhere. Perhaps he belonged in space.
When Jim entered Sickbay, he noticed Spock staring intently at Bones while his friend just muttered. He stopped and watched the scene, fascinated. Spock always antagonized Bones because his friend was mouthy and Spock was excessively rational. Maybe opposites attract and Spock was developing a liking for his friend. At that age Jim often got crushes on any adult reliable enough to stick around for a while; teachers, counselors and a neighbor on one occasion. If Spock had a crush on McCoy it would be so funny, he could hassle Bones forever. He subdued his slight discomfort at the thought of Spock crushing on someone who wasn't him because that was nuts.
Spock seemed to notice his stare, since he glanced at him and forgot about Bones entirely. That made Jim happy; this was so messed up.
"Jim!" Spock almost ran to him, looking excited.
"Where's Uhura?" Bones turned around when he heard Spock saying Jim's name.
"She had things to do," Jim said smiling. "So, Spock, are you ready for your big tour?"
"I am," Spock said solemnly.
"So am I," Bones said dryly. "This is a Sickbay, not a nursery. Take your kid and leave."
"He's not…" He noticed the gleam in Spock's eyes when he heard Bones call him Jim's kid and felt his heart clench. "All right, we're leaving."
"Good." Bones looked at Jim. "Don't feed him junk food."
Jim hadn't even thought about what he was feeding Spock; he hadn't thought about what he was doing with Spock at all.
"I won't," he said finally, since Bones was wearing the 'don't fuck it up' glare he was so fond of.
"Can we leave now?" Spock said in an impatient tone. "I am sure Doctor McCoy must be eager to return to his normal activities."
Jim exchanged looks with Bones, who only shrugged. Jim nodded with a smile.
"Let's go, then." Jim waited for Spock to pass in front of him; the kid just stood next to him as if he was waiting for Jim to take his hand or something. At least, that was what Jim used to do when he wanted Sam to hold his hand; he stood next to his big brother and waited until he got the hint.
The Ambassador said hands were off limits, though. Then perhaps Spock just wanted to walk next to him. He had to stop overanalyzing this or he would get a headache.
He settled for giving Spock a small push in front of him to cue him to start walking; Spock looked startled but started walking anyway, without getting too far away from Jim.
"This is the biggest ship in Starfleet, Spock," Jim said proudly. "We have the finest crew and the best technology."
"Doctor McCoy qualifies as a 'fine crewmember'?" Spock asked with incredulity.
"Oh, I know he seems grumpy but he's the best doctor in the whole fleet. He just isn't a people person."
"I see," Spock said with a tiny frown. Jim was fascinated with that. Spock was so transparent at this age. You could see what he was feeling immediately, it made Jim feel somewhat closer to the boy, and made him forget that he would return to normal soon.
Or at least, that was what he was hoping for.
Jim answered every question Spock had about regulations, the Enterprise and Starfleet in general. He seemed informed about what enrolling involved; he even added a few things while Jim explained what serving in Starfleet implied. Jim tried to avoid looking at Spock because the kid kept staring at him like he was the best thing in the entire world. That was new for Jim. He wasn't used to people idolizing him; Chekov always made him a little uncomfortable. He was a screw up, he was used to the 'you're nothing but a burden' look that was so often directed at him. Spock could have chosen a better role model, like Bones. His friend was moody and rude, but he was the best in his field. Jim had just gotten lucky.
Luck was something that Jim always had on his side.
Spock didn't seem to mind, though. Maybe that was because he was a child and didn't remember anything; he didn't know about his father, or the trial for cheating on the Kobayashi Maru, or what happened to Vulcan. He only knew that Jim was his friend, and that was enough for him.
Jim wished it could be enough for the adult version of Spock as well. Spock only confided in Uhura, and he would never think of Jim as a friend. He was too insubordinate, too reckless, too different for Spock to even consider sharing experiences with him. Having this child's devotion and trust and attention and having the Ambassador worrying and wanting the best for him just pained Jim more; it was like getting small glimpses of what having Spock in his life could be like.
"Are you feeling unwell, Jim?" Spock halted, and Jim realized he hadn't said anything in a while.
"I'm fine, Spock. How about we go to the mess hall and get something to eat?"
Spock nodded enthusiastically and Jim smiled widely. He'd been afraid he would do something wrong and mess Spock up, but he was starting to think that this was no different to when he met the Ambassador for the first time. This was a different Spock; he wasn't the Captain Jim knew, and he had to stop thinking of him as an adult. He was a kid, he needed support and trust. Jim knew better than anyone what it was like when adults disappointed you. He wouldn't do that to Spock. He deserved better.
They all deserved better.
"So, Spock, how about you tell me more about Vulcan?" Jim asked after they sat down in the mess hall. Spock had chosen this weird grain thing – apparently Uhura had told him earlier that he enjoyed it as an adult.
"Vulcan is a desert planet with mountain ranges and large areas which are set aside as wilderness preserves. It has a much higher temperature, a stronger surface gravity and a thinner atmosphere than Earth…"
"Whoa, whoa, take a breath, kiddo," Jim interrupted Spock with a smile. It was annoying when adult Spock entered into 'lecture' mode, but from the kid it was amusing.
"I apologize," Spock said. "Did I give the wrong response to your query?"
"No, no… I was just expecting a more…. human approach."
Spock looked taken aback, and Jim wondered what he had said to cause this.
"It's just that you said it like a Vulcan and I can read that in any document," Jim said carefully, in case he angered the kid. According to Bones, even a Vulcan child was stronger than an adult human, and Spock could probably kick his ass even though he could walk under a table without crawling.
"I am Vulcan," Spock huffed indignantly. Okay, being human was a touchy subject even when Spock was a child.
"You're also human," said Jim before he could stop himself; he'd just said that it was a touchy subject and yet he had to put his foot in his mouth again.
"I chose the Vulcan teachings. I am Vulcan," Spock said forcefully, in a snappish tone.
"Well, sure, but that doesn't mean that…" Jim saw how Spock was glaring at him. At least this was familiar.
"Good evening, Captain," Sulu interrupted. "Do you mind if I join you?"
"Not at all," Jim sighed, relieved. Sulu was a lifesaver, honestly. If the conversation had continued, Jim was sure he would have caused a disaster.
"Hello," Sulu said cheerfully. "I'm Hikaru Sulu."
"I am Spock." Spock looked at Sulu with confusion.
"He knows about what happened to you, Spock," Jim said in a low voice in case the Vulcan was still pissed at him.
"I see."
"But that doesn't mean we can't get to know each other better," smiled Sulu.
Jim let Sulu handle the conversation while he just stayed silent, watching Spock. He answered Sulu's questions politely, but Jim noticed that he avoided looking in Jim's direction. Yes, he was definitely pissed. Jim felt some discomfort at this; okay, he didn't like the devotion Spock showed every time he looked at him, but he also didn't like the cold distance he was putting between them just because Jim reminded him of his human side.
To be honest, Spock probably exceeded Vulcan standards thinking that would bury his human heritage. Jim could relate to a point, but it was useless to deny something that was part of you.
Chekov approached their table and Jim was grateful for that. Chekov was very empathic, Spock could connect with him.
"Hello, Captain." Chekov saluted Jim formally. "Can I join you for dinner?"
"Go ahead, Chekov," Jim nodded. "And don't call me that."
He noticed that everyone was calling him 'Captain' now instead of Commander. He was getting used to it pretty quickly.
"But you're the Captain," Chekov said, excited.
"At least for now," added Sulu happily.
"You two only want to punish me with paperwork," Jim complained. He knew how many reports Spock did per day and it was crazy. He had to fill out reports for almost every movement he made on the Enterprise.
"I'm Pavel."
"I am Spock," Spock said in a dry tone. Okay, he didn't like Chekov either, which was weird because in Jim's opinion, Chekov had the best smile aboard the Enterprise.
Chekov apparently noticed Spock's tone as well, since he just smiled and turned his attention to Jim. Sulu kept asking Spock questions, and Jim didn't know if this was better or not.
Spock felt out of place in the mess hall, surrounded by the crew. He was not used to sharing space with so many individuals, given that when he wanted to be in a public place, other Vulcans generally preferred to move to a different location as though Spock had some sort of contagious disease. To some of them, he did indeed have a disease: human emotions. That was why he was working so hard to control them. Being with Jim made this process easier. He felt like Jim would not judge him if he said something 'improper', and the fact that he was willing to share his meal with him made Spock relax.
Starfleet seemed like a finer option with each passing moment.
When Jim asked about Vulcan, Spock thought he wanted to know everything related to the planet. However, when Jim said he expected a 'human approach', Spock felt something twitching in his stomach. He thought that Jim, being his friend, understood that he was trying to suppress his human side because he was first and foremost a Vulcan. He had chosen to embrace that culture; if he wanted to be human, he would have gone to Earth. He had been wrong. Jim was like everyone else in his life. He wanted to force him to be something he didn't want to be. And if that was a 'friend', then Spock could live without one. He had done this for nine years. He could manage to do it until he could talk to his father and request to return to Vulcan, where he needed to be.
Taking a deep breath, Spock tried to calm himself while he answered Mister Sulu's questions. Jim had not said anything to him, and he was analyzing what has just happened. He let his emotions control him again, which made him furious at himself more than he was angry at Jim. In fact, Jim had just asked a question and he had overreacted because it was a reminder he had to face every day: he was also human. Jim had no way of knowing that at this age, that was a difficult topic for him. Jim knew him as an adult, with perfect control of his emotions. Perhaps Jim thought Spock had the same control as his adult friend, he had no way to know that at the moment he was lacking of self-restraint.
This made him feel ashamed of his reaction. He had viciously ignored the only friend he had, and now Jim would probably be mad at him.
Spock saw how Jim smiled when a young man with a yellow shirt approached them. It made him feel uneasy. The young man sat down and Spock noticed that he spoke with a marked accent. Russian, if he recalled correctly from what he had heard in his mother's holovideos. He introduced himself, smiling, and Spock was annoyed. Jim had been watching the young man since he sat down, and as soon as Spock introduced himself, he rudely turned around and started talking to Jim. Mister Sulu kept asking questions that Spock did not want to answer while Jim spoke animatedly with the young man. It made Spock feel angry.
Jim had not say a word to him since Mister Sulu sat down to share his meal with them, and now he was ignoring him for this man whose speech barely made sense.
Spock's mother said that he was a proud boy. He had difficulty admitting when he did something wrong (which it was rare); in this case, he wanted to interrupt Jim's conversation with the young man and have Jim's full attention again. He had to admit that he was the one who had pushed Jim away for something it was not worth it. Having a friend involved admitting when you did something wrong; if Spock wanted Jim's friendship, he had to take the first step.
It was hard, though. Seeing how hesitant he was, he wondered how he and Jim had become friends. It was unlikely that he had made the first approach; Jim must have been the one who came closer to him. How Jim had managed to do that was a mystery to Spock.
"Penny for your thoughts."
Spock tried not to look startled at hearing Jim's voice so unexpectedly. He lifted his eyes and saw Jim smiling kindly at him, and he knew he must be blushing.
"I apologize," Spock said quickly.
Mister Sulu and Mister Chekov exchanged confused looks. He doubted that he was rude as an adult, why would they look so perplexed because Spock apologized? He looked at Jim, who only shook his head.
"Don't worry, Spock; they aren't used to kids being this polite. You're a very correct child, at your age I was using more… colorful language."
Spock tilted his head. How could language be 'colorful'?
"I cursed a lot," Jim explained, probably guessing Spock's confusion.
Jim kept talking about his childhood. Spock listened attentively, grateful that the previous tension was gone. Jim managed to make him feel secure again without approaching the subject that had made him uncomfortable in the first place. He was a valuable friend. Spock envied his adult self for a moment; he would have liked to have a friend like Jim while he was growing up. He was so used to being alone that he was vulnerable when it came to any topic he considered too personal, and he was defensive, thinking that everything anyone said to him was meant as a reproach. If Jim had been there whilst he was developing his social skills, he probably would have dealt better with emotions. Perhaps he could have found someone who truly understood what it was like to be in a room full of people and yet feel completely alone.
That made Spock wonder what would happen once he returned to his normal age. Would he forget what he had experienced at this age? How long that would take? Jim said he was fixing this, but in case he could not do anything, would he be sent home to his parents? It would be the logical choice; Spock was a child, he needed his parents' guidance.
However, Spock would like to stay here, with Jim. He felt like Jim was the missing piece in some aspects of his life, and he could be content staying on the Enterprise. He would miss his mother greatly, but he could always call her and visit her from time to time. And perhaps he would also miss his father (not as much as he would miss his mother), but it could work for both of them. His father was often criticized because he had a 'flawed son', this way he should receive fewer complaints about Spock.
If Spock decided to stay, would Jim support his decision? He glanced at the blond, watching him having a discussion with Mister Chekov about alcoholic beverages. He was a child, he would probably be a burden to Jim if he chose to stay. Still, he would like to have the courage to ask for what he wanted for once in his life, instead of doing what he must because he was a Vulcan.
Jim noticed how Spock was lost in his thoughts, probably bitching about something, though he hadn't any idea of what it could be. The kid got angry, yet he didn't throw tantrums, yell or show anger in a normal way. He just kept silent and ignored Jim, and to be honest Jim wasn't used to this kind of reaction. When people were pissed at him they usually yelled at him or punched him. Deciding to let Spock to just cool off, he continued his talk with Chekov while Sulu tried to cheer the kid up and failed miserably.
Then Jim felt something in his mind. It was strange… like a tug or something. He glanced at Spock, and the kid was chewing his bottom lip, like he was afraid of something. What the hell was happening here? Honestly, Spock looked adorable like that, if Jim could take a picture he would (and Sulu would probably call Bones to examine his head), but Jim felt like Spock needed him to intervene, almost like he wanted Jim to speak to him. Jim decided to do it and see what happened – the kid changed entirely and was all gleaming again; it was odd. It was like Jim knew that Spock needed to hear he wasn't mad at him, but how could have Jim have known that? He couldn't read minds, and he doubted this could be a side-effect for the mind-meld, the Ambassador would have mentioned it if it was.
Even when he didn't seem to like Chekov at first, Jim noticed that now Spock was watching them conversing about drinks with contemplation. It made Jim feel uneasy because he didn't know what the kid was thinking.
"How about you show Spock your daughter?" Sulu said eagerly, distracting Jim from his thoughts.
Spock looked at Jim with an eyebrow raised.
"Are you married, Jim?" Spock asked. If Jim didn't know better he would have thought that tone sounded like disappointment.
"No, I'm not. Sulu is talking about…"
"Watch it, remember what I told you," warned Sulu, like the mother hen he always was with the plant.
"Oh, you have to let the Captain off the hook this time, Sulu," Chekov chimed in. "How is he going to explain about Lilly if he can't say that she's a plant?"
"She's not a plant." Sulu glared at Chekov.
"A plant?" Spock asked with curiosity, and Jim thought he sounded exactly like the Ambassador.
"We were on this mission, and we adopted a plant," Jim explained quickly. "Sulu is a botanist, so to him every plant has a gender."
"If you do not mind my question, was I on that mission as well?"
"No, you had to stay on the ship because we had an emergency in the laboratories."
"I see."
Spock looked like he was upset again; Jim was becoming an expert in pissing the kid off. He didn't have much time to ponder this before his communicator buzzed.
"Kirk."
"Captain, everything is in order, I'll prepare the report for Starfleet," Uhura's voice echoed.
"Excellent, thank you Uhura. And don't call me Captain."
"You are the Captain," she goaded.
"That's what we said as well," Sulu added in a cheerful tone.
"Fine, you don't need to ambush me. We'll proceed as I indicated before. Lieutenant, please arrange everything for tomorrow."
"Yes, Captain." Now she just was being annoying. "Uhura out."
Noticing the eyes on him, Jim fidgeted uncomfortably in his seat. Being Captain when someone else was 'incapacitated' wasn't as fun as he thought it would be.
"Maybe I can take Spock to see Lilly tomorrow; it's pretty late and he needs to rest," Jim said, smiling.
Sulu and Chekov glanced at each other, surprised. Jim wasn't completely useless with kids; sure, it was hard to imagine him with one, but he knew what he was doing… sort of.
"It has been an exciting day," Chekov said, supporting Jim, which earned a glare from Spock.
"What do you think, Spock?" Jim asked casually.
"I would like to retire for the night."
"It's settled, then." Jim got up. "Come on, Spock, I'll show you your room."
Without saying another word, Spock stood up and walked away from the mess hall in a hurry. Jim sent an apologetic smile to Sulu and Chekov, and followed him. Jim guided him to his room. Thank God Uhura was fast. He had talked to her and asked her to go to Spock's room and take anything that could lead to awkward explanations; she wasn't too thrilled to be digging into her ex-boyfriend's stuff, but she was the only one Spock would ever allow to do this.
"This is your room, Spock," Jim said as he introduced the code. "I'll leave you the code for the security system in case you need anything, but I would prefer if you waited for someone to show you around and keep an eye on you."
"I can manage without adult supervision," Spock said, offended. Of course, nine year olds always though they were already grown ups.
"I know, you'd really be doing me a favor, though. Starfleet doesn't allow children on the ships, and if you wander alone and something happens, my head will be the first one to roll." Jim noticed Spock's eyes widen. "I'm speaking metaphorically, Spock."
"I do not want to cause you trouble, Jim. I shall wait for you if I need something," he said soberly.
"Okay then, let me show you how to operate the replicator and you can get any type of clothes you want. I think we both agree you are too big to get dressed by someone else," Jim smirked.
Spock turned green and gave the most adorable display of shyness when he ducked his head, shaking it.
"All right. If you need something, I'm in the other room. Feel free to enter anytime if you need something, I'm not locking it at the moment. Anything else you need?"
Spock seemed to hesitate when Jim looked at him.
"You can say it Spock, don't worry."
"I…Is there a possibility of sharing the room with you?"
"You want to sleep with me?" Okay, that came out wrong and disturbing. Spock flushed again. "No, wait… you want to be in the same room with me for the night?" A little better. Not by much, but it was less disturbing.
"This is an unusual place for me and I thought I could be with someone with whom I can feel secure. I will not be a bother and I can help with anything you need for your reports."
Spock acted like an adult, but he was just a child in a strange place without his parents. He was freaking out in his own way, and Jim couldn't let him struggle just because he was uncomfortable with the idea of Spock being in his room.
"Well, the reports are classified, only Starfleet personnel can access to them," Jim smiled gently.
"I am part of Starfleet," Spock said.
"Nice try. Change your clothes and then you can join me in my room. We'll have a sleepover."
"What is a sleepover?" Spock tilted his head.
"You've never gone to a sleepover? When friends invite other friends to each others' houses and they play games and make prank calls?"
"I do not have any 'friends' at the moment…" Spock said in a low voice.
"Oh, that's not true. I'm your friend, right? And as such, I can't allow a nine year old kid to go without the 'sleepover' experience. Get your stuff and we'll have a blast."
Spock looked uncertain, but he nodded anyway and Jim went back to his room to get things ready. A sleepover with a Vulcan… what the hell was he supposed to do?
Junk food first… Spock was a vegetarian; maybe sweet things would do the trick. (Bones didn't need to know about this.) Then he put blankets on the floor. He hadn't had a sleepover in almost fifteen years, he had to improvise. This would be a great opportunity to make Spock more comfortable on the ship. Jim hoped that by tomorrow he would find the way to reverse this, but in case it took longer, Spock needed to feel safe and relaxed here. He had to make this a second home for Spock.
Jim wondered if he wanted to do that for Spock or for himself. He heard a small knock.
"Come in, Spock."
When Spock entered the room, he looked exactly the same as he had when Jim left him in his room five minutes ago.
"Spock, wouldn't you rather put on other clothes to sleep?" Jim frowned.
"I am quite comfortable with this attire."
"I guess everyone has different definitions of 'comfortable'." Jim smiled. "Okay, come, sit down."
"On the floor?" Spock lifted an eyebrow.
"Yeah, don't worry, it won't bite."
"I know that," Spock huffed, sitting down indignantly.
"Spock, at every sleep over, there's a tradition… the one who can stay awake the longest is the winner." Jim winked.
"What would be the prize?"
"There isn't really a prize, just the proud feeling of beating others to feed your competitive side."
"I understand," Spock said calmly. "I believe I will win this game."
"How so? You're a child and I'm an adult."
"I am a Vulcan and I do not need as much rest as a human."
"I think you're bluffing." Jim waved his hand. "Okay, let's eat," Jim saw the small frown on Spock's face. "What? You can eat this, right?"
"I have eaten sugar before. My mother said I am not allowed to eat it without her supervision."
Jim smiled. Spock was such an obedient kid, unlike him at that age. For Jim, 'no' meant 'yes' and 'in your dreams' meant 'hell yeah!'.
"Well, I'll be supervising… don't you think it's enough?"
Spock tilted his head and reached for a caramel apple. Jim took that as a 'yes'.
"Spock, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
"I am grown up," Spock said licking the apple with confusion, almost like it was a mystery to unravel.
"Oh, you know what I meant, kid. What would you have liked to do if you weren't in Starfleet?"
"I wanted to be admitted to the Vulcan Science Academy," he said in an odd tone.
"Nerdy as usual." Jim smiled.
"Doctor McCoy said the same thing. In any case, I obviously failed since I am here. I believe that my instructors were right after all, and I do not posses the same capacity as a full Vulcan. Being in Starfleet makes sense since it was probably my only choice"
Jim was familiar with those words, even though Spock pretended it wasn't a big deal. It was the self-pity thing that Jim had had going on since he was born under George Kirk's shadow. Being Spock probably wasn't as easy as Jim had thought it was. If anything, it looked like it was ten times worse.
"If it's any consolation, you were accepted by the Academy, but you told them to piss off and decided to go to Starfleet because we rule and they drool," Jim said to comfort the kid. How in seven hells did Jim know that? Spock hadn't said anything about it… yet he was sure Spock had rejected the Vulcan Academy.
"I did?" Spock didn't seem to believe it either. Jim nodded. "How unusual. No one rejects acceptance to the Academy."
"You were the first one. You are a rebel, Spock."
"I am not," Spock said shyly, but with a small smile.
"Don't sell yourself short. It's good that you're a revolutionary. You get to do what you want."
"It will be very satisfactory if I accomplish that," Spock mused.
"You already did, kid. Don't forget it." Jim smirked. "Now, it's getting late… you know what that means?"
"Are we going to sleep?"
"No, Spock! This party is barely starting. It means prank calls!"
"What are 'prank calls'?"
"When you dial someone and make a joke… unfortunately it doesn't work as well as the old-fashioned way used to because people can see you when you call, but sometimes we got costumes to scare them. Like 'a zombie called to say your brain isn't working'. It was funny."
Spock didn't look like he believed him, and he probably didn't get the joke either. It was fine; Bones didn't get it either when Jim tried to prank him at the Academy.
"Will not people get upset if we do this?"
"That's the point. Annoying others can be amusing."
"I understand. I distress my father often and I find it entertaining."
"Really? What do you do?"
"I meditate for one hour and forty five minutes instead of two hours."
"Wow, you are a rebel," Jim grinned. This kid was so cute. "Let's make some prank calls, then."
"How are we going to accomplish that? I believe everyone will know who makes the call."
"Not if we use the communicator. Bones first because he's grumpy."
Jim reached for his communicator and it wasn't long before they heard a sleepy "What?"
"Doctor McCoy," Jim said, disguising his voice, "you're the sexiest beast on this ship."
"What?" Bones sounded appalled "Who the hell is this?"
"I'm your biggest fan." Jim looked at Spock, who only raised an eyebrow.
"You better stop this immediately or I'm reporting you to the Captain," Bones threatened.
"But why?" Jim whined. "I'm just an innocent girl."
"You are not a girl," Spock corrected. Okay, the kid seriously needed training in what a prank involved.
"Jim?" Bones said angrily. "What the fuck, man?"
"Shh, Bones, I'm with Spock," Jim said in his normal voice. "We're having a sleepover."
"Did you two drink something that turned you into thirteen year old girls?" Bones sneered. "You better not have been giving him junk food!"
"Um… let's say I haven't. Okay, bye-bye Bones."
"I told you not to…"
Jim cut the communication before his friend started ranting about nutrition and how he found the concept of a sleepover idiotic.
"Wasn't that fun?" Jim asked Spock.
"I found it somewhat entertaining." Spock tilted his head in agreement.
"Now… Chekov!"
"I believe Mister Sulu would be a more fascinating call."
"You don't want to call Chekov?" Jim frowned. Spock kept glaring when he heard Chekov's name.
"He is a young male, if we disrupt his rest he could be inefficient in his work and get fired." Spock seemed to reconsider. "On second thought, he would be also a great source of amusement."
"Nah, you're right, Chekov needs his beauty sleep," Jim said. Spock kept up the glaring. "Sulu it is, then."
They kept calling the crew making jokes; Scotty was the funniest of all. After they got bored with the calls (mostly Jim got bored. Spock was only going with the flow) they started naming constellations to see which one of them knew more.
"And Andromeda is also…" Jim blinked, feeling tired.
"Jim, if you need to sleep, please do so," Spock said in a concerned tone.
"Nah, I'm fine. You just want to cheat in the contest. I can manage…" Jim lay down. "Maybe I'll just close my eyes for a second."
The last thing Jim saw before falling into a deep sleep was Spock's eyes filled with fondness.
N/A: Maybe I should have warned about the fluffiness in this chapter. The prompt 'sleepover' requested by Lanie-san has been fulfilled, I hope you all enjoyed it. My partner in crime, your teeth better hurt with this or else I'm bringing the reindeer horns. As always, a big thank you to my awesome beta Anbessette, who is amazing and patient with me.