A Very Bad Idea
Chapter Three
Clarity
Formatting Note: Bold/Italicized portions are Shepard's memories that occur while sparring. They happen simultaneously.
We put our water down, and started circling.[For my eighth birthday, my parents took me to a zoo on earth]I feinted with a right, he readied for a left, [My Dad knew the head veterinarian.], instead I rabbited with my right. I jumped back, and threw a kick at his side. [I had to see the big cats. I loved big cats], He dodged easily.
He came at my left, then my right, [No. My Dad said. We'll see the cats later.] I held my arms up, he kept it up. He was trying to pin me against the rail. I don't think so. [No. I screamed as loud as I could.] As we got close, I dropped straight down, [My Dad tried to calm me. Please, I have a surprise] I rolled left and past his right., he was starting to turn, [It was cruel. So close. A real live cat. And I couldn't see them] I came up behind him, and rabbit punched him.
As he turned to face me, [I kept screaming. My Dad picked me up. Kicking and flailing] using all my weight I pushed him. He hit the rail, [People were staring at us. I didn't care. I hated them] I swung my leg out, and he flipped back over the rail. "Ha!"
I walked over to get my water, [We came to a door. They knocked, and a bespectacled man let us in] and reached down. [It was a med-bay for animals. In the center of the room was a black cat] He pulled both my ankles back, I pitched forward. [A black panther, laying on his side. He was beautiful] I got my hands out in time to break my fall. I rolled, ready to push him off. [Do you want to pet it?]
He just moved to his side of the room, [Sedated and bound for tests. He was awake though] and grabbed his water. He leaned back against the rail, [His eye followed me as I got closer, but he didn't react] and just eyed me. I matched his stance. What was his game today? [I ran a hand down his back. Coat soft and smooth]
We took our positions. [I could feel the muscles underneath. A low rumbling growl. Beautiful] I jabbed, he jabbed. I kicked, he kicked. [I placed my ear on the side of his chest and closed my eyes] I would feint, he would jab. He would feint, I would jab. [Eyes closed, my head on his chest, I felt immersed in his rumbling growl. I scratched his ears with my right hand] It was a great rhythm. A dance, if you will. [My left wandered over his back and side. The softness of his coat, the hardened muscles underneath. Beautiful]
I had just feinted right, [His mouth was partly open. Teeth exposed, designed for one thing. White a contrast with black] then he matched it, and nailed me with a right. [I started to move my hand, then brought it back.] Hard. I stumbled back. He pressed on. Right. Left. Right. Left. [I placed my hand over his paw. It was huge, even without the claws]
Arms up, I was in defense mode, needed a plan quick. [One of the techs pressed on the pad of his paw. His claws extended. I couldn't breathe] Doubting he'd fall for the same thing twice. And he was not letting up. [I slowly moved my hand towards his paw. No reaction]
I kicked his leg, seeing if it would break his rhythm. [I ran my finger down a claw, then felt the tip. Sharp. He flicked his paw, then retracted his claws] No dice. I thought about kicking his spurs, but that was a dick move. [I laid my head back down, petting the top of his head]
I moved to close the distance, getting right up to his chest. [He stopped his rumbling. I didn't move, lost in his breathing. Seconds. Minutes. Relative] Being that close was making it hard to keep his speed. [Then. The most amazing thing … he began to purr] Now my plan was to get in closer, then pop him on both sides his face with my arms. [I was lost in the sound. No words to describe what I felt] Right up against his chest, I was readying my move, in between his breaths, I heard it, a low rumbling growl.
Black. Rumbling. Fur. Muscles. Plates. Two moments at once.
I was tucked into his chest. The hits not as hard, he couldn't get the angle. [Are you dreaming?] I felt and heard rumbling.
He stopped jabbing. He grabbed my upper arms, holding them against me. [What do you dream?] He also, bless him, pulled me up a bit. I could see over his shoulder.
I faked a head-butt. He stepped back, come on, one more step. [Show them to me] I did it again, and another backwards step. OK, Vakarian, I'm trusting you. [I moved my head to his neck, my eyes facing his] He still had my arms pinned. You've never said it, but I know you have a thing for limber.
I grabbed his cowl the best I could, thanked the spirits for narrow Turian waists. [His purring much louder there] I swung my legs up and around his waist, I grinned at the look on his face. Both my feet hit the wall behind him at the same time. [Scratching where his neck met his chest. I just watched his eye] I shrieked, and yanked down on his cowl, and pushed off with my legs. His eyes had never left mine.
He pitched forward, I held on to his cowl. He rewarded my trust. He let go, brought his arms down to break the fall. An audible oomph from both of us as we hit the floor. [Bright yellow against black, he watched everything] He went to roll off, but I still held his cowl stopping him. Watching his eyes. We both tried to catch our breath, he was still rumbling. "What are you searching for?"
I dropped my arms and l started laughing. "What?" He was grinning. I waved my arm with a flourish. "You get to explain, if someone walks..." He jumped off. "Yeah. It would be bad." He'd answered while pivoting to sit up.
He was leaning back on the wall, I crab-walked back to the other. "I knew you would. Not think, knew." I said between gulps of water. A slight tilt of his head, only response. "Break the fall." Slightly muffled as I toweled my face.
"Nice to know I'm predictable." He looked, … annoyed at that?
I laughed at that. "No." No, he may be many things, but not that. "You are many things, Garrus Vakarian. Predictable is not one of them." Smiling as I said it. Truer words...
I rolled my shoulders. Solid, not predictable.
He got up, came over and offered me a hand. I took it, then wondered. He started to pull, I made no effort. No resistance either. He stumbled, never let go. "Well?" A challenge. I quirked an eyebrow.
He positioned himself, bent down, and pulled me up. I dropped my legs beneath me. He had the cockiest smirk on his face. He earned it. I couldn't help but smile. A smile I felt throughout. "Good to know."
"Yeah. I wouldn't get used to it, Shepard."
I toweled my face and hands one more time, tossing the towel, somewhere. He was adjusting his gloves.
We faced off. I started to circle, he went for my right. Easily deflected. He backed up. Dancing right, left. I stayed, pivoting, guard up. From the right, a low swung leg. I jumped back. He jabbed. Missing. What was his game?
He would dance right, left. Throwing swings. I kept my arms up, he'd try low, I'd deflect. "Act." He said after a right jab. "Huh?" He swung a leg, I jumped back. I'd move back. He lowered his stance. Came in fast Right. Right. Left.
He rocked back, his right arm pulling back. My eyes dancing between right and left, had to be a feint. It was, he flew forward, tackling me. We went down. He rolled right, and back up on his feet. He offered me his hand, took it, starting to get up, he pulled. Right into him. "Act. Don't react." Letting me go.
Fuck you, I thought. I tucked down. I went right. Weak deflection. I stayed in a low crouch, moving right. He pivoted, following. I tried a right, he brought his knee up, deflecting. Good to know.
Staying crouched. I went right again. Knee up. I grabbed, and pulled back. He hopped, and down he went. I rolled to my right. Leaping back up. "Like that?" Asshole.
He was up. Ready. We circled. I feinted right, tried a left. He brought his arm down hard, deflecting it. That stung. I focused on that. [I got up and moved to the other side of the table. A better view of his eye] I threw myself past his left side, throwing a punch as I went by. I connected on his side.
I tried to get in a kick, but he had turned already. Back up. Circling. I couldn't stop grinning. He just watched me. [I leaned left. I leaned right. He followed.] I feinted right. I feinted left. Again. And again. And again. I swung a leg. Then the other. I didn't expect it to work. [Raahhhrr, I screamed. Waving my arms above my head] Feint right. Feint left. Again. And again. Go right and left, Vakarian. Go right and left. He did.
Rapidly, I tucked my arms in, elbows forward, and launched. Connecting. He staggered back. [A cacophony of voices. My mom grabbed me. My Dad knew better. My eyes never left his] He held his hand up. Stop. Trying to catch his breath.
He was bent over, hands on knees. His breathing slowly returning. [I elbowed my mom. She dropped me. "She's a handful isn't she" "You don't know the half of it" He never reacted.] "You, OK?" He nodded.
"Take a break?" I asked. Shit, didn't mean to hit him that hard.
"Naw. Just give me a minute." He was taking deep breaths, steadying his breathing. "Fuck. Wasn't ready for that one." He tried to give me a smile, just couldn't yet. I felt a bit better.
"Hey. I'm sorry. I didn't think that.. I didn't think it would turn out this way." I didn't mean to hurt him.
He waved a hand. "We're good. Don't worry about it." He was standing now, gave me a smile. "You do realize that's your only victory for the day? You know that." He rolled his shoulders while talking.
"You sure you're good?" I rolled my shoulders. Then neck.
"Knocked the wind out of me. Nothing more. Wait. You didn't think you actually hurt me, did you?." God, sometimes he was the smuggest son of a bitch.
"There are times when I wish it was back to, Yes, Ma'am. No Ma'am. Where did the good ol' days go?" Oh, come on. He deserved that one.
"Ready? Ma'am?" He brought his arms, he was ready.
With a yell, I barreled straight at him. He stepped back. I'd come in low, I had no hope it'd work. The fact he stepped back told me what I wanted to know. I went for his thigh with my shoulder. He rocked back a little, but that was it.
"That's it?" He asked, as I moved back. I opened my eyes wide, batted my lashes. "Sigh. Yes, that's all I can do. You're much too much for me." His laugh made it to his eyes.
"Glad you finally realize that." Still laughing. "Ma'am."
Keep it up laughing boy. I will win today. Yes. Today belongs to me. As if reading my thoughts, he gave a shake of his head.
I took my stance. I feinted right. Low with a left. Deflected. Right back with a right. Deflected. Left. Deflected. I changed my stance slightly. Another right. Deflected. Feint left, right straight at him. a feeling of triumph as I feel it connect.
He shakes his head, steps back in. Circling. He jabs right, followed by a left, I deflect both. I stay low, height his advantage. Circling, I study him. Circling, I take in the room. [I move back to him. A hand on my shoulder stops me] He jabbed left. Arm up deflecting, ready with my left. He came at with a right, when he grabbed my arm and pulled it down, I staggered. [Shrugging the hand off. I move up] Then drop and roll.
Back up. He's turned to face me. He swings. Fast. I deflect, but it stings. Good. Pain brings clarity.
A crouching stance. Circling He jabs left. Right. I'm too low. He doesn't have much to work with. [I move around the table. I place my head behind his ear. I want to be you] I feel the clarity as it washes over me.
I jab from the right. Deflected. Left. Deflected. I move back, higher stance. He jabs, deflected. Left, deflected. A blur on my left, arm up. It takes the brunt, but pain radiates from my temple. [Are you waiting, I whisper] I move back. Lower stance this time.
I jab at his knee, he pivots it back. I map how his leg moves. Circling right, staying low. He tries a kick straight at me. [He is in our world. Drugged. Restrained. His existence a threat] I push and flip back. Staying back. A higher stance this time. He moves to me.
He circles. I match his movements. I will follow. Learn. Adapt. I will follow. Until it is my time.
He starts to jab. Right .Left. Right. Fast, very fast. I keep pace, deflecting all. [Scratching his head and chest. Purring. Whispering, will you kill us, if I free you] He steps back, shaking his arms. I look in his eyes. They are smiling. That warms me, not sure why. [A hand on my shoulder. Our time is drawing near] Farther apart, we circle.
I lower my stance and move up. I jab, right and left, at his body, easily deflected. [We are many. You are one. We are afraid] I stay at it. Then two quick jabs into his thigh. He moves back. I do the same.
I spare a glance up, his eyes watching me intently. Waiting for something. I move back another step, circling left now. Clarity slowly washing through me. [You have one purpose] A right swing, I'm too far back, he responds anyway. I map his reach. I move in, he tightens his stance. I shift into my normal stance. His eyes never stray.
I swing with a left. He's still deflecting, when I jab right. He deflects down, it's what I wanted. I connect hard at the base of his rib cage. [You are beautiful] With a single thrust of a blade there, you can disable a turian. A single hit will only stagger him. Staggers. We both move back.
I dance on the balls of my feet. I tilt my head at him. He's rolling his left arm. He nods back. We renew the dance. Circling. [And you are death] Watching. He moves in fast alternating jabs. My arms up defending. He tries to hit low. I don't move my arms, I move to go low. [My dad's hand grips my shoulder] It deflects his blow. He wasn't expecting that.
He pauses for a second, his arms still. I reach up grab them, pull my legs up, plant them on his abdomen, and push off. Flipping I land on my feet, and hop back. I look at, into his eyes. They dance with amusement. I stay back. Dancing on my feet. [I whisper thank you] He moves forward. I dance back a step. He steps back.
I know the moment well. When clarity completely envelopes me. An old friend. A warm remembrance. All is focused. A singular purpose. I watch his eyes.
He moves. I dance. He moves right. I dance right. He moves up. I dance up. We circle. Feints Tests. He makes his move, I roll right. We resume. Dancing with barely contained violence.
I move in, rapid alternating jabs. He surprises me. [Best gift ever, my Dad asked. No. My Dad was the best gift ever] He's down a little lower than usual, he moves to deflect. He brings his arm up, it catches my arm, flipping me back. Landing on my back with an audible oomph. He's standing over me. Anger coursing through me. All he has to do is drop and pin me. I lose. I shriek. A flash of clarity. He tilts his head. A grin I've never seen, blue eyes dance, and he walks away.
A/N: Bold/Italicized portions are Shepard's memories that occur during sparring/life. Both are happening at the same time. It's the only way with the formatting restrictions that I could make it work. Hopefully, it works.
Chapters 3 & 4 have taken a life of their own. I have pruned and trimmed repeatedly, revised multiple times.. There are so many revisions, these chapters have their own folder.
I am tempted to pull and trash this thing.
I wish to thank all those that sent nice comments. Very nice of you to take the time. Thank you