Jo confronts Henry revealing to him the secret of her past and who she really is.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. I'm merely borrowing them for my own amusement.
Spoilers: None past the second episode.
Author's Notes: The title of this story was taken from the first line of the song Flares by The Script and was altered from, "Did you lose what won't return?" This story was written when the series was quite new and there was very little information regarding Abigail. With the information now available, it's clear that what happens in this story is impossible due to time line issues, but it's still an interesting concept to think about.
When Henry entered the apartment he stopped short at the sight of Jo and Abe hugging on the couch and felt a small stab of resentment. Of course he had been the one to tell her to find someone to talk to if she couldn't talk to him, but he had meant one of her other friends or perhaps some sort of counselor. It had never occurred to him that she would seek out Abe. Then again she probably saw Abe as a father figure and perhaps that was what she needed right now. Upon a second look he saw that they had both clearly been crying. He wasn't surprised that Jo had been crying as she was obviously going through something difficult right now, but what on earth could it be that would make Abe break down in tears as well? He cleared his throat to alert them to his presence and they pulled away from each other when they realized he was there. "Um I'll just leave you two alone to talk and go fix breakfast. Jo you're welcome to stay and join us," he said and went into the kitchen with the bag of bagels.
Jo sighed. "I hoped I would be gone before he got back. I should go. I'm sorry Abe, but I don't think I can handle having a meal with him right now."
Abe squeezed her hand. "You have to tell him, the longer you wait the harder it's going to be, and not just for you. He'll be respectful enough not to ask me what we talked about, but he'll keep giving me those looks until he gets it out of me."
Jo couldn't help laughing in spite of herself. "I remember those looks well. If he thought you were hiding anything from him he wouldn't say anything, but would just keep looking at you with an expression that was both questioning and disapproving until you'd confessed to whatever it was."
"Yes that's the look. I can only hold out so long against it," said Abe with a chuckle.
Jo gave Abe another quick hug. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have dragged you into this before I was ready to tell both of you. It was selfish of me. There just wasn't anyone else I could talk to."
"It's ok, I understand, but you need to go in there and talk to him," Abe said gently but firmly.
Jo shook her head. "I'm just so confused right now. It's like I'm two people in one. I have all these memories of being Abigail, but I'm still Jo too and I feel so guilty. I fell in love, got married, and mourned when my husband died and I still am really and now I feel as if I've cheated on Henry."
"Oh Mom, there is no way he's going to hold that against you under the circumstances. Go talk to him, you can't begin to heal until you do, and you know he's still hurting even after all this time. You both need this."
Jo smiled sadly knowing he was right. "How did you grow up to be so wise?"
Abe smiled back. "I had some pretty incredible parents." He led her into the kitchen where Henry was toasting bagels. He grabbed himself a bagel, spread cream cheese on it and took it back out to the living room to eat leaving Jo alone with Henry.
Henry nodded at Jo and motioned for her to sit at the kitchen table. He finished preparing a couple more bagels then placed them on the table. He then poured a couple of mugs of coffee and sat at the table across from Jo and passed her one of the mugs.
"Thanks," said Jo and stared at her bagel. She had seldom ever felt less like eating but she took a sip of coffee.
"I know I said I wouldn't press you about what was bothering you, and I don't want to," said Henry gently, "but you chose to confide in Abe and you've clearly upset him. I think I have a right to know why."
"Yes you do," Jo murmured in agreement.
"Why don't we eat breakfast and you can tell me whenever you're ready?" he suggested giving her his most understanding smile.
Jo nodded and forced herself to take a bite of her bagel chewing it slowly before swallowing. They ate in silence with Henry glancing at her every so often with a concerned expression on his face. When they'd finished eating Jo took a long sip of coffee and then took a deep breath before speaking. "About a week ago I went to see a psychic with one of my friends for a laugh. The psychic did a past life regression reading on us. I was told that I had been a nurse in World War II and that I had met my husband during the war who happened to be an army doctor," she paused as she saw the expression on Henry's face change from caring and concerned to a stiff and serious frown. "She also said that we had adopted a child that was recovered from one of the concentration camps and that my husband and child from my previous life were both still alive." At this point Henry's face went white as a sheet and he started gripping his coffee mug so hard she thought he might break it. "At first I just thought of it as an interesting anecdote, and didn't really take any of it seriously, but then later that day I started having memory flashbacks and I've been having them ever since..." she trailed off biting her lip trying to keep herself from breaking down in tears again. "It was like I had been asleep my entire life and I'm finally starting to wake up for the first time and I remember you and Abe from before."
Henry opened his mouth, then closed it again. He stood up and turned away from Jo covering his eyes with one hand, his elbow resting in his other hand. He knew he had felt some sort of connection to Jo from the first day he met her, but he thought it was simply because they were both grieving for their lost spouses. He never would have imagined that it could be anything like this. "It can't be... It's not possible..." he murmured and started to walk away.
Jo got up and grabbed his hand forcing him to turn and face her. "Henry look at me. Life is about the journey no matter how long it lasts," she said quoting Abigail, quoting herself, from so long ago. "I'm sorry Dr. Morgan, but I'm not letting go so fast."
Henry stared at her in wide-eyed wonder, words failing him. As he gazed into her eyes he felt himself start to shake and then his knees buckled. Jo caught him and lowered him to the floor so that they were both kneeling facing each other. She grabbed the back of his head and pulled him in to kiss him and she kissed him exactly the same way Abigail had kissed him. He wanted to pull away but found himself putting his arms around her and returning the kiss in spite of himself. "Abigail?" he said breathlessly once he'd finally broken away from the kiss.
Jo smiled and nodded with tears in her eyes. "Yes you can call me that if you want, though you'd probably better keep calling me Jo in public."
Henry nodded and laughed, his own eyes wet with tears. "Yes I've definitely had enough of mental hospitals for one lifetime." He sighed and his face turned sad once more. "I can't believe this is happening. You have no idea how much I've grieved for you, so many years..."
"I know Henry, I know," said Jo caressing his face wiping away the tears that had spilled down his cheeks. "I wish I had come to you as soon as I realized the truth so you wouldn't have had to suffer even one more moment of unnecessary pain, but I thought I was going crazy at first. My memories were coming back in bits and pieces and even now there are still a lot of gaps. I had to be absolutely sure before I could tell you."
Henry nodded. "I understand." He stood up pulling Jo to her feet with him. "Look, I'm sorry. I know how hard it must have been for you to come here and tell me the truth, but now I need some time alone to process all of this. Please stay and spend some more time with Abe if you like. I'll be downstairs in my laboratory." He squeezed her hand and kissed her tenderly on the cheek before turning away and heading downstairs.
Jo watched him walk away crestfallen, but she couldn't say that she really expected any other reaction from him. She headed back to the living room and collapsed on the couch next to Abe and he put his arm around her.
"I'm guessing Dad didn't take it very well," Abe said.
Jo sighed. "He seemed happy and sad at the same time, but I think he was mostly in shock and I can't say that I blame him."
"I'll go talk to him."
Jo shook her head. "No Abe, leave him be. He needs some time alone right now."
"Fine," Abe grumbled, "but if he's still down in that dungeon of his in an hour I'm going in."