Alternate Title: Un-Evicted!

(A Note from the Author: This one's a tad shorter than part one, but I'm pretty proud of it! Enjoy, kiddos!)

After too long fending for themselves with no money, not enough food, and a fairly awful (and smelly) shelter, Fionna and Cake jump at the chance that a passing picnicker might share their food with the hungry duo, only to find that the guitar-playing basket-toter is the very last person either of them wants to see.

"Fi. Fi, baby, wake up."

"Uuuunnnngh…"

"Don't you groan at me, get off your girly butt and come help me find dinner."

"Ugh. Fine…" Grrrgrgrgorogrgrorgr. Fionna's stomach grumbled like an angry Cake who'd gotten caught in a rainstorm. What an awful nap… They hadn't eaten since the morning before, having spent the whole day and night running from a pack of wolves whose territory they'd come upon. Fionna finally rose from her makeshift bed of moss and leaves, brushing away crinkles of leaf and grass on her side.

Two weeks had passed since the mysterious shape-shifting bat-guy Marshall Lee had kicked them out of their treehouse. Well… his treehouse. They'd stopped in at the Candy Kingdom and found that there was a deed on record for the house under the name of 'Marshall L. Abadeer' and had been there since long before Prince Gumball was even born. That told Fionna and Cake that this Marshall Lee person was a lot older than the eighteen years he seemed to look. Cake simply reasoned that if he was a shapeshifter, he was a magical being with a long lifespan and didn't age as fast as most people. And in finding the deed, Fionna and Cake lost all hope of getting their super-rad treehouse base back.

They'd been searching for berries and hardly had enough to fill their hands after two hours, so they sat down to eat what they had and try to figure out what they could do. They'd taken shelter in a dead troll's home, the very same one that had imprisoned Marshall Lee and knocked the snot out of Fionna. It stunk something awful until Cake got rid of the dirty rags and piles of fish bones inside, then it became bearable enough to sleep in.

Sitting in a shady glade, the two tried to enjoy the berries and not wolf them down, but when Fionna got to the very last, best, reddest, and juiciest berry, she wanted to savor it. Before her teeth closed on it, it was suddenly pulled from her fingers and up into the air, where the color drained from it and it fell back into her lap. She was wide-eyed and would've been afraid if she wasn't so angry. She tried to eat it still, but it tasted awful, like rotting leaves and grass. She stood up quickly and Cake, who hadn't even noticed all of this, looked up in curiosity and then alarm when her sister suddenly yelled at thin air.

"WHO THE GLOB DID THAT! WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH FOOD, AND YOU GOTTA DO SOME JERKY THING LIKE THAT?!"

"Fi, what-"

"THEY STOLE THE LAST BERRY!"

"… Who?"

"Like I know!" Fionna threw her hands up in the air and fell to her butt next to Cake with her head hung low.

"It was just one berry, sweetie…"

"I know, but… We haven't had enough to eat in two whole weeks since we lost all our money because of that bat-boy…"

"I know, Fi, but we're cat people, y'know? We can make it."

"I know… I guess I just miss the treehouse so much that everything else is setting me off."

"I'm sorry, ba-… what's that sound?"

"What?" Fionna looked up, and soon she could hear it too. It was a sweet melody, and she soon recognized it. "It's a guitar… who's playing a guitar in the middle of the woods?"

"Let's go see. Maybe they're havin' a picnic! Maybe they'll have extra food!"

"Heck yeah!" Fionna jumped up like she'd been charged full of electricity, and the two hurried toward the sound. What they found was half what they expected, and half what they hoped they'd never see again. There was a picnic basket, full of red apples, red berries, red candy… a lot of red. But above it floated the very shapeshifter that had put them into their current predicament, and he was strumming on a single-sided bloodred axe that had been converted into an electric guitar that seemed to play just fine without an amplifier. He wore a red, black-striped plaid shirt, long blue jeans, and red sneakers. His hair looked simultaneously as if he'd only bothered to run his fingers through it in lieu of brushing, and as if he'd spent hours styling it with a hairdryer. He was humming quietly to himself as he strummed out a sweet but almost sad melody that reminded Fionna of a cold, snowy night somehow.

"Marshall Lee?" She asked without thinking, and the shapeshifter opened his dark eyes, looking cooly over at them.

"Oh. Hey, uh…?" Fionna then realized he'd never even learned her name.

"Fionna the human. And Cake the cat."

"'Kay. What do you want?"

"Nothing…" Fionna mumbled. Cake took her hand to lead her away but Fionna wouldn't budge. She had something to say, but she couldn't figure out how to say it yet.

"Alright. So… shoo," Marshall Lee waved them off carelessly, and that made Fionna turn slightly pink with anger.

"You can't make us leave. It's not like you own the woods too."

"Actually… I kinda do."

"Psh, you're really a piece of work, ain't you?" Cake growled.

"Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal. Vampire King and all that," he flashed a fanged smirk and Cake's tail frizzed. Vampires? She was terrified of Vampires. And that explained why he could shift into that demonic bat form.

"Vampire King? So where's your kingdom, then?" Fionna challenged.

"Wherever I want it to be," he stated cooly, then added with a glance out of the corner of his eye at Fionna, "Which includes the forest right now. So, uh… shoo, little girl, and take your little fur-butt with you. You're jacking up my vibes."

"That's it!" Fionna suddenly took a flying leap at the vampire. He had been expecting a struggle, but not the crazy catlike leap she made at him intent to claw his face off. Then again, her sister was a cat.

Marshall Lee was lucky for the guitar between himself and Fionna, so he had a shield to thrown her off with, but she whopped him a good one in the jaw before she fell and landed perfectly on her feet. She didn't give up, grabbing his foot and hanging on for dear life as he rose into the sky with a hiss. "Get off, little girl!"

"Make me, you fang-y jerk!

"Oh, I will," Marshall snarled and shot into the sky so high that Fionna clung to him for safety rather than to climb up and fight him. He flew in spirals until Fionna's grip slipped and she went flying (not quite so well) down into the forest. Thankfully Cake caught her in the form of a long-legged trampoline and Fionna used the bounce to streak back up into the air with her sword drawn. Blade and axe clashed and Fionna fell again to the Cake-trampoline, landing safely and staring up in fear as the vampiric youth shifted into his massive demonic bat form.

Fionna had never seen such a beast and it scared her, but it also challenged her. C'mon, Fi, you kill trolls and giants for breakfast! A big ugly bat demon is nothing, even if he is a king! Cake flung her back into the sky, but this time, Marshall Lee caught her rather than trying to block her. Fionna was so shocked by being caught in such leathery huge hands that she lost her sword and it fell to the earth, striking point-down into the grass. Marshall Lee began to squeeze and Fionna yelped for her cat sister.

"CAAAKE!"

"I'M COMIN' BABY SISTER!"

The magical cat stretched up and up until she wrapped around the demon bat just as he had wrapped his hands around Fionna, and Cake squeezed until Marshall Lee felt weakness in his limbs and dropped Fionna out of the sky. She fell with a scream and it was all Cake could do to catch her with a stretched-out footpaw like a safety net. But that distraction cost Cake as Marshall Lee clawed at her face with one hand free. The two fell to earth and both returned to normal shape and size, panting heavily. Fionna pulled her sword from the ground and bolted to Marshall Lee, the point at his neck as he slowly opened his eyes. His axe guitar had fallen just out of reach, but he didn't feel like fighting anymore anyway.

"It's over, Marshall Lee!" Fionna roared with determination and fearless confidence. Marshall Lee was almost impressed.

"Yeah, I guess so," he answered with a sort of half-bored smile. Fionna was caught off-guard by such nonchalant behavior, until he flicked her sword out of her hand and pinned her to a nearby tree by her throat, a foot off the ground as he floated before her. Fionna gripped his arm for all she was worth, trying not to be hanged. He wasn't strangling her, but her body weight alone was enough to restrict her throat against his hand. Cake was passed out, and Fionna couldn't get the breath to cry out for her.

"C-Cake…" she rasped, but the cat didn't move.

"Listen up, little human, the treehouse is mine, fair and square. Even if there wasn't a deed, it'd still be mine because I'm the Vampire King and whatever I say is mine, is mine," Marshall Lee whispered menacingly as he drew closer and closer to the terrified girl.

"I… wasn't fighting… for the… treehouse…" she gasped. Marshall Lee raised a confused eyebrow.

"Then what the glob did we just fight about?"

"Honor," Fionna spoke the word she valued above all else as loudly as he constricted throat would let her. She thought she was hallucinating from lack of oxygen when she saw the vampire start to crack an amused smile, which turned into a fanged grin, then a chuckle, and then all-out belly laugh as he dropped her to her knees and she gasped for breath. He floated above her as if lounging on his back, his hands over his sides as he cracked up laughing at the recovering human below him. What was so globbing funny?!

"What… the heck… are you laughing at?" Fionna growled between breaths.

"You!" Marshall Lee snorted. "Honor! Man, I haven't laughed this hard in centuries at anything other than cowering candy freaks!"

Fionna finally lifted her head as she caught her breath, watching him as he descended before her and tossed a key into the grass in front of her. "Here."

"Wh-"

"It's the key to the treehouse. I'll get what I want out of it and go find another place."

"But… why?" Fionna looked up at him with the most confused and lost expression, so much so that he couldn't help a chuckle.

"What can I say, I like little kids who make me laugh. Later." He picked up his guitar axe and he was gone into the sky. Just like that, Fionna had her most favorite place in the world back, a home, a warm bed, money, food… She almost wanted to cry and laugh at the same time with the relief, the confusion, and the utter absurdity of it all. And maybe she'd get a chance to understand this Marshall Lee guy. Vampire King… that sounded kinda cool. And if he played guitar half as well as he fought, she would like to hear that.

Pffft. Fionna, what the heck are you thinking? He almost killed you, he's the Vampire King, he's the strongest evil creature you've ever met, he kicked your butt and gave you back your house in the most insulting, belittling, weird and stupid way, and you want to hang out with him?!

Heck yeah I do!

Seems like something he'd do, right? Hah! Leave a review and let me know what you think, and the next chapter oughta be out soon! Toodles!

-Taiylor Wallace