Author's Note: Wow. *Sheepishly hands over chapter and slowly backs away

Disclaimer: I do not own the Mentalist and would not be foolish enough to claim to.

"-just get the job done and we're set."

No matter how hard he tried to concentrate, Jane kept mulling it over in his mind, prying at the edges, trying to think of everything from another angle or some point-of-view he'd never considered. Maybe it wasn't what he thought. Maybe he was wrong.

But Mrs. Ruskin had placed something inside that safe. A safe with master-level double-hides, so that even he hadn't found it when he had cased the place. That meant something. Something big. Like a fortunes worth of the hardest, most valuable gems imaginable. Right within their reach.

Why did he hate that so much?

"Patrick- what's wrong?"

Jane was startled out of his reverie, looking away from the book laying unopened on his desk and over his shoulder, following the soft breath that had just been present on his ear. Following the smell of cinnamon.

Lisbon was there behind him, leaning over the surface of her desk so that her earnest face was hovering near his shoulder. Her long, black satin hair was pulled back and out of her face in public for once, so that he could see her eyes without shadow.

It was like being dowsed with cold fire, something that raced up and down his spine in waves.

Her gaze was wide and dark, almost like the green had turned a different shade with her worry. Something like moss and water mixed together. If she was mad at him about last night, stealing a kiss on her cheek- there wasn't a trace of it present on her face. The only thing there seemed to be a kind of anxiety.

"Uh, nothing." He answered her lamely. "Nothing's wrong." What could he say, after all? That the woman he'd been living with liked to hide strange boxes in wall safe's in the middle of the night? That he was actually worried he might have just found what he had been sent here to procure?He didn't really think that would go over well. Teresa didn't know who he was, who he really was, and as much as he loved sharing things with her, he wanted desperately for it to stay that way. Besides, he didn't know quite what he had seen the night before. Mrs. Ruskin could have just been putting away...

Hell, he couldn't think of anything else she might have been hiding, but that wasn't what was really bothering him. What was really bothering him, was that he didn't really care. He could get into the safe, take the damn diamonds, and call his getaway right at this moment. He could have done that last night. It would hurt Mrs. Ruskin, in a way no one could understand that hadn't met her, and that wasn't something he wanted. In fact, it made him ache just to think about, but it wasn't like he had a choice.

This was his life.

No, there was only one thing preoccupying his attention. One thing he couldn't seem to stop thinking about. One thing he couldn't face having on his conscience, even if his life was on the line. One thing he couldn't bear to lose.

Teresa.

Just the way she was looking at him now with a furrow over her brow, soft and hard and beautiful all wrapped inside a seductively mysterious and dangerous fireball was enough to be heartbreaking. Jane swallowed, still looking into those eyes. For what felt like the first time all day, like he'd been trapped in a fog. After all, they were already sitting in English, waiting for Ms. Hightower to appear. It seemed impossible to him, all of the sudden, that he'd been able to be so wrapped up in what happened the night before that he hadn't even noticed that he could see her eyes so clearly before now. For a moment, no other thought would enter his head other than that.

She was just so beautiful.

Fingers snapped in front of his eyes. He blinked.

"You're staring, Jane." Lisbon said it sharply, as though she was annoyed, but the very corner of her lips betrayed her, tilted slightly upward.

Hurriedly, he cleared his throat and looked back at the book on his desk. "Sorry. I guess I'm... a bit distracted today." The ability to feel her eyes seemed like a disadvantage now. As she narrowed her gaze at him, he felt as though her eyes speared him to his seat.

"Clearly."

From the very corner of his eye, he could see Lisbon's brow furrow further as she frowned over at him. A gusty sigh left her lips as she bowed her head.

She abruptly left her seat, came around him, and suddenly sat on his desktop, letting her feet dangle almost a foot off the floor. Her jeans had a worn slit just above her knee, where it seemed like the whole lower half of the left leg wished to detach itself completely and flee the vicinity. Tilting his way, she leaned in conspiratorially so that only he would be able to hear. She twisted to put her arms to either side of the desk, caging him in. She peered up at him through her lashes, expression worried yet oddly determined. "What's up?"

Trying not to have a heart attack, though his pulse seemed to be fluttering fast enough to categorize as one, he cleared his throat again. "Just... just some stuff." He halfheartedly shrugged one shoulder up and just as slightly back down, staring at her throat so he didn't stare at her lips so close to his. "Stupid stuff that I'm not entirely sure I should do anything about. It's nothing." He finally looked up to see if she bought it.

Lisbon didn't seem convinced. "Well, something about it's obviously bothering you. Is it about tonight?" Her eyes turned suddenly vulnerable. "'Cause if you need to cancel, I-"

He answered too quickly. "No!"

She pulled back a little at his vehemence, brow still turned down as she put her hands in her lap. Hunching her shoulders up a little, she gave him a tiny little, uncomfortable smile. Slipping her hands between her thighs to press in together and biting at her lip, she spoke volumes with her eyes on him.

"No, Teresa." He whispered more gently. Despite his nerves, he didn't want to waste any more time they had to spend together. "My grandmother is really looking forward to meeting you." Plus, the old lady would kill him if he canceled.

That statement didn't make the girl in front of him more relaxed.

He sighed and leaned in closer to Lisbon so he had her full attention, saw her stiffen slightly when he put a hand on her leg. His voice almost broke as he pled his honesty, hoping she wouldn't mistake him again. "I am too. Really I am." Looking forward to being with her anyway. Maybe not both women at once, but, he'd live. He hoped.

Slowly, Lisbon's mouth curled up into a bashful smile. She tilted her head to look down to the desktop, to slightly hide that from him, before again turning back on him with a small frown. "Then, what is it? Something's happened? Was it because of something you did?"

Trying not to laugh, he eyed her, pulling his head back to do it properly. "Why do you say that? Why's it automatically because of something I did?"

"Usually seems to be." She answered nonchalantly, a grin trying to escape her. "So- what is it then?"

Honestly. This woman. "Something I'm doing." He huffed, folding his arms over his chest.

Lisbon let out what might have been a giggle, though she'd probably never admit to it. Her eyes, almost hidden because of her smile, sparkled at him. "Anything I can do?" Her quiet tone was sincere despite her mirth.

Honestly, this woman. Turning his gaze away, trying not to be distracted by that sparkling in hers, he shrugged again. "I'll let you know." He hoped that would be enough.

Apparently, she was willing to let it be.

"You do that." She touched his hand, the one he had forgotten was on her leg, and got up, going back to her seat and plopping back into it. Her foot immediately rose and rested against his back.

Reveling in it, Jane closed his eyes. God, no. He wouldn't make the call. He couldn't- not yet. He needed more time. More time to feel things like this. This connection, this electricity. This longing. He needed it. He needed her.

He needed Teresa in his life now. Suddenly, viscerally, impossibly- but there it was.

:)

All right, he felt like he was choking. The blasted tie was definitely a bad idea. Secretly relieved that was the case, Jane stripped the offending thing off, tossing it on his bed carelessly. He shakily finished buttoning his shirt up his chest, then pulled on his vest and buttoned that too. Finally, slipped his shoulders into the waiting tailored jacket. Done, he spun and studied himself in the mirror.

That was better.

Admiring the effect of the three piece suit he'd donned, he slid a hand down the pressed front, tugging at the bottom.

He looked good.

Good enough? He hoped so. This dinner had to go well. Mrs. Ruskin couldn't suspect a thing, and Lisbon needed to feel safe. It would take a delicate balancing act to accomplish both at the same time. It needed to be done though. He had a feeling that if something were to go wrong tonight, Teresa just might be likely to run in the other direction. Now that he'd determined to put off making the call, he needed time. So he needed to make this work.

Please let this work.

He gazed at his appearance in the mirror more critically, trying to ignore the fact that his chest was rolling with anxiety, churning up his stomach and his pulse. Something was off. The jacket was too much. He had told Lisbon slightly-casual nice. Not formal. He shrugged it off again and discarded it where he'd flung the tie. Long white sleeves down his arms to the buttoned cuffs seemed off though too. He looked like something out of an old British drama. All he needed was ruffles at his neck. Carefully, he unbuttoned the cuffs of his shirt and folded the sleeves up his forearms.

Perfect. He just hoped Teresa thought so.

The doorbell suddenly rang out through the house and his heart jumped into his throat.

Well, he was as ready as he was going to get for this. He took a deep breath.