Chapter Two: Remus

Remus knew his mouth was hanging open in a way that his mother would have scolded him for but at that moment he couldn't help it. He was staring at the blonde boy clutching the wall as though the rest of the world was going falling apart around him. Of course he wasn't an idiot, he had known that the boy was focused on him. But he figured it was just from confusion and gratitude from when he had killed the death eater who was attempting to slaughter the boy during the Battle of Hogwarts. Remus was waiting for the boy to approach him as so many others had but Draco never had.

But Harry's revelation showed Remus what a fool he'd been. The young Slytherin was infatuated with him or at least thought he was. Remus wasn't going to lie to himself, why would a young man as truly handsome as Draco Malfoy want him? A middle aged man who was truly no treasure to look at. The boy was simply confusing his gratitude with something more. He just needed to set the boy straight and everything would go back to normal. Really a simple problem.

Remus closed his mouth and swallowed hard before looking at the floor. He could feel Harry's concerned gaze and said, "Um, Harry I will talk with you later."

Harry thankfully didn't argue with him but simply stood and shakily walked towards the door. Remus watched as he leaned in to say something to Draco but the blonde whirled around and shoved Harry hard before yelling, "I fucking hate you Harry Potter." The blonde gave a desperate sob before hurrying out of the room.

Remus hurried to help Harry up and out into the hallway but Draco was already gone. His shoulders slumped and he felt a pang of pain for the poor boy. Draco was already so isolated at the school. His friends distancing themselves from him, the other students never quite forgiving his role in Dumbledores death or his actions during the war. Remus had already expressed concern to McGonagall about the boy, but she had said that unless he became obviously depressed or asked for help they couldn't approach him, it might embarrass the poor boy. And now for this to happen was sure to make the poor boy even more distant from those around him. Remus' pang of sadness grew into a lump in his throat and he ached to go search for the boy. Draco Malfoy needed someone to pay a good long amount of attention to him, to show him he was still a good person.

"Remus?"

He turned and was surprised to see Harry still standing next to him in the doorway. Remus let out a disappointed sigh and nodded for the boy to continue. Harry shuffled uncomfortably before saying weakly, "I didn't know he had real feelings for you...I thought he was still bad, like before."

"Harry, in so many ways you've grown over the last year but you still hold on to those childish notions of good or bad. Do you not remember that Draco was also a victim of the war, of his father and of Voldemort. He didn't start off with the right notions of good or bad either but he chose at the right time to join our side, to fight with us, with you. It makes me very sad that you chose to see a boy doing evil and reverting back to who he was when he was younger, instead of seeing a boy with seemingly no friends, his family shunned and very clearly desperate for a friend."

Harry had a look of extreme guilt on his face and his hands were squeezing the front of his robes tightly. His voice shook when he answered Remus, "You're right, I'm a prat and now I've hurt him more than anything else."

Feeling a twinge of guilt himself, Remus reached out and clasped Harry's shoulders, "Oh Harry you meant well, I know that you did. Don't worry about Draco, I'll find him and smooth everything over."

"How? He's completely in love with you."

"He's not in love with me Harry. Draco's just confused." Remus said, even as his heart pounded in his chest.

"Remus I watched him watching you, he's completely head over heels for you. And I think he was so scared of it that he was willing to do something to get you to love him back." Harry chewed his lip and shrugged, "I don't know I may be way off, but I think you should talk to him."

"Thank you Harry." Remus stepped back into his classroom and watched as Harry headed off.

Once he was sitting at his desk, surrounded by all the grading he needed done, Remus found that he couldn't pay attention. Shoving his greying dirty blonde hair back, Remus let out a groan and shook his head. Sure this wasn't the first time a student had had a crush or infatuation with him but for some reason this felt different. He didn't flush with embarrassment when he thought of Draco watching him, he didn't feel uncomfortable by the idea that maybe the beautiful blonde did want him, it made him...it made him feel warm inside, and that scared the crap out of him. He didn't know what to think of Draco's supposed feelings.

Standing he started shoving his grading back into his satchel to take to his private quarters when the door creaked open. He opened his mouth to inform the student that was entering that he was done for the day when he caught sight of the shaking blonde in his classroom. Swallowing hard, Remus took a slow step forward, "Mr. Malfoy, are you okay?"

The blondes eyes were red but he shrugged and said hoarsely, "I've been better."

Feeling tense, Remus cleared his throat and motioned for Draco to sit in the chair in front of his desk before sitting behind it. Taking a calming breath he gave the boy a small smile, "I'm so sorry that Harry did that you Draco."

The blonde sank into the chair and gave him an even look, "Yes well, he's kind of an asshole."

Remus let out a startled laugh and shook his head, "Mr. Malfoy normally I would take house points for that but i think that just this once, I'll let it go."

The blonde flushed and chewed on a fingernail before saying, "He did kind of do me a favor though..."

Stiffening in confusion, Remus tilted his head, "Oh? How so?"

"I was being an idiot and instead of confronting my...Feelings." He shot Remus an anxious look before continuing quickly. "I was going to do something horrible to you and I know it was wrong but I didn't know what else to do. I was just so nervous about what I was feeling."

Heart pounding, Remus let out a low breath and looked down at his desk, "Draco I know our history is complicated and that you might be confusing your feelings of maybe gratitude or whatever as something more...romantic, but you have to know deep down that's not how you really feel." He peeked up and was stunned to see the blonde looming over him, hands pressed on the flat of his desk as he glared down at him.

Remus sat back in his chair and winced when the boy said in his usual icy tones, "Are you try to presume to tell me what my feelings are Remus Lupin?"

Remus felt his body reacting to the passionate way Draco was speaking and cleared his throat before trying to admonish the boy, " ..."

"No! You listen to me." Draco was beautiful in his anger, his cheeks were turning and his lips turning red, his long lean body was taut and tempting under his white dress shirt and black pants, his green tie was tossed over his shoulder. He seemed to be trying to keep himself composed when he said, "I know my feelings, I struggled with them for the last year. I want you, I'm in love with you and I don't want to hide it from you or myself or anyone else."

Shaking, Remus felt as though his stomach was dancing inside his body. He swallowed the lump in his throat, "I...You're my student, what do you expect me to do or say?"

Draco let out a shuddering breath and pushed his tousled hair off his face, "I don't know! I've never been so confused in my life. I just know that I would do anything to have you."

Remus lost control of his body and openly gasped at the raging erection that was shoving painfully against his zipper. Scrubbing his hand down his face, he shook his head both at Draco and the voice inside his head screaming at him to take the beautiful, bold boy and lay him across his desk before claiming him with his mouth. That stupid voice in his head was screaming at him to show the boy just was he was really asking, and god what if he was a virgin, Remus could teach him everything there was about pleasuring a man.

The rational voice in his mind was telling him that it was wrong, that Draco was a young, lonely boy, who had no idea what he really wanted. It was urging him to send the boy away, to turn him down and then to get somewhere private where he could take care of himself in peace, where no one could see the shame in his eyes or hear Draco's name on his lips when he came.

A soft hand on his face pulled him back to reality and he realized that he must have been sitting there with his warring emotions easy to read on his face for some time. Draco had turned his chair and was standing in front of him. Remus started and tried to jerk away only to have that soft hand hold him still. A pair of apple red lips was all he saw coming towards him and he gave an alarmed noise when the blonde was suddenly there, almost in his lap, kissing him as though it was nirvana. Oh merlin, the boys mouth was soft, insistent and he tasted so good. Remus' mind went blank as a small wet tongue probed inside his mouth. Groaning he reached up to cup Draco's chin and held the boys face still so that he could properly kiss him. Draco let out a happy moan and tried to press cloer to Remus as the professor proceeded to kiss the daylights out of him.

Remus stroked that soft as silk hair and tangled his tongue again and again with the blondes. His clothes felt itchy, his brain was screaming at him to rip them off and press their hot lengths together. Draco must have felt the same because one shaky hand had reached up to pull at his professors robes. His swollen mouth pulled back from the kiss just enough to mumble against Remus' lips, "Oh yes. Please, Remus, oh please."

The sound of his name being so desperately said, had the older man pulling back with wide eyes and a horrified feeling in his chest as he realized what he was doing. The fog of arousal lifted and he looked down to see himself standing and pressing the boy back into his desk. Draco was almost perched on it, one of his legs wrapped around Remus', his beautiful mouth was even more red and plumped than it had been before. His gaze was sleepy and filled with unmistakable desire as he took in his professor.

With a curse, Remus ripped himself away and stalked to the other side of the classroom. Covering his face with his hands and ignoring his throbbing erection, Remus used every curse word he knew and shook his head at his own foolishness. What had he been thinking trying to take the boy that way, giving his baser animal instincts. He was a weak fool! What if another student walked in or another Professor? Madness, that's what it obviously was, he was losing his damn mind! The boy was just almost irresistible to him.

"Remus?" A soft, nervous voice called to him.

"I think you should leave ." Remus said sternly, hoping the blonde couldn't hear how badly his voice was shaking.

"But..."

"Now Mr. Malfoy." Remus snapped, still without turning.

He heard the boy sniffling and holding in sobs but refused to turn to him. He knew that if he took the boy into his arms, he wouldn't be able to let him go. Remus clenched his fists and felt his heart tightening as the boy stumbled out of the room. Wrapping his arms around himself, he sat at his desk and with his head in his hands.

The next day was Saturday, so Remus was able to stay in his private rooms as much as possible to avoid the grey gaze of the imp who was plaguing his thoughts. He was wracked with guilt and was hardly able to concentrate on his work. He hated himself for encouraging Draco and then turning him away so coldly. He knew what it was to fall in love or to at least believe that you were in love only to be rebuffed. He had done worse than Harry could have with his words. Draco expected Harry to treat him the way he did, but he looked to Remus for comfort or friendship and instead his feelings were treated callously and with a terrible thoughtlessness.

Remus was disgusted with himself for touching a student in such an inappropriate way. These were not yet functioning members of the wizarding community. They were his charges and he was to teach them only about Transfiguration and not about the ways of love. Draco was seventeen, almost eighteen, which meant that he could not get into legal trouble but it would tarnish his reputation if he were to get romantically involved with a student. Parents and his colleagues would look down on him or regard him with suspicion when it came to other students in his charge. And he'd had enough suspicion being aimed his way to last him a life time. He didn't know if he could take anymore.

That night he fell back onto his bed and hated himself when he instantly began thinking about that intoxicating kiss. His body reacted almost instantly to the mere memory of Draco breathing heavily into his mouth as he devoured his mouth. The boy was obviously a virgin if not simply very inexperienced. But the way he had responded was addicting to Remus, so beautifully pliant and willing to offer himself up for the older mans pleasure.

Tossing his head on his pillow, Remus groaned and shook his head as he remembered how Draco tasted. His mouth was like an apple, so delicious, refreshing and arousing. He wondered what it would feel like to have the young mans mouth on other parts of his body, would it feel just as warm and soft as it when they were kissing?

Cursing himself, he gave in and reached inside his pajama bottoms and took hold of his rock hard cock. Moaning, Remus tugged on it, not even pretending that he wasn't picturing Draco's hand on him instead. He could only imagine the way Draco would bashfully look down when his delicate hand wrapped around his hard length. Speeding his palm up, Remus was panting when he started picturing Draco pulling on him hard, that pale body all of a sudden naked, the long, lean lines so clear in Remus' mind. Coming close to losing it, Remus groaned out of Draco's name and felt his body tauten at the memory of his name on the boy's lips. Husky and passionate, he wanted to hear that voice moaning in his ears as he pounded into him. He knew that Draco would be perfect under him, so submissive and eager.

Remus came hard, groaning into his pillow and felt the familiar flash of shame shoot through him. Banging his head on the pillow, he settled into a restless sleep.

The next night at the staff meeting, Remus could hardly concentrate and Professor McGonagall had to call him to attention several times. When the meeting finally ended, Remus approached her and apologized profusely. Over her small, square glasses, she gave him a stern look, "Everything okay Remus? You seem so out of sorts."

"I'm just having a personal problem that I'm having trouble working out for myself. I'm so sorry I wasn't all here today." Remus frowned and pulled his papers closer to his chest.

McGonagall gave a soft chuckle and patted his shoulder, "Remus, you've always been so put together and responsible, I think even you deserve an off day every once or two decades." They shared a companionable smile before she continued, "Whenever I have a problem I know there is someone that I can turn to for help that has never let me down. Why don't you go up and see him, I'm sure he'd love to see you."

Remus gave her a watery smile and nodded, "Perhaps your right. Thank you Minerva."

"I'll stay out of my office for the rest of the night, take your time. I think I deserve a night off too." She gave him a wink and left the staff room.

Remus tightened his robes around him and hurried out of the room and up a route he knew so well. He saw as boy sitting on the steps to a staircase and felt his heart skip a beat when he realized who it was. Ducking his head, he hurried past the boy but felt his sad gaze on his back. He walked in a daze the rest of the way up the Headmasters office.

"Remus my boy how nice to see you!" A cheery voice greeted as soon as he was in sight.

"Albus, it's been too long." Remus smiled happily at his mentor and pulled a chair in front of the wall of previous Headmasters.

That twinkling, electric blue gaze studied his face happily before looking mildly concerned, "My boy, whats bothering you? You look ill."

"No, not ill Albus, just... I don't even know how to discuss this situation with you it's so awkward." Remus flushed and rubbed a hand across his eyes.

"You can talk to me about anything Remus, after all I'm just a portrait."

"Well, I'm having a situation with a student...Er, he seems to think that he's in love with me." Remus reddened even more if possible and took a deep breath, "He's of age, but I just don't think it would be at all proper."

Albus, he was surprised to see, was still smiling at him, "I see, well, I think the majority of my professors have gone through this at least once in their careers." He gave a short chuckle, "At least yours is of age."

Remus laughed for a second, "Well I can't say that I'm not relieved but...There's more."

"More?"

"Yes um, well I seem to also be experiencing some emotion for this student and I think that he's picked up on that." Remus rubbed the back of his neck, while avoiding Albus' knowing gaze, "And well, somethings happened."

"I see..." Albus looked down at his steepled fingers for several long moments before answering, "Remus I've known you since you were eleven. I believe that you are an exceptionally responsible person, but I don't think you allow yourself any slack. If you allowed something to happen with this student, than you must be feeling something genuine for him and you must be convinced that his feelings are real for you. Never would you take advantage of a students crush or obsession, I know that with every fiber of my being."

Feeling his welling with emotion, Remus ducked his head and sniffed, "Thank you Albus that's very kind."

"You do deserve to be happy Remus, you don't have to spend your life punishing yourself for something that you didn't cause." Albus gave him a gentle smile.

"I never imagined it would be Draco Malfoy." Remus laughed.

"Draco Malfoy?" A cold voice asked in the portrait next to Albus'. "My godson, Draco Malfoy?"

Remus winced and slid his eyes over to meet the irate gaze of Severus Snape.