Sam watched as Dean left the room after getting him his painkillers and water, seeing is slump shoulders, the distant look in his eyes, all signs of a big brother hurting. He didn't hate Dean, never could hate his big brother no matter what, just now he can't trust him and that hurts him as much as it hurts Dean. With everything that Dean has done the last six months he just can't forgive him, he lied to Sam so many times that it's just too hard to believe in him. That is what hurts Sam the most, not believing in Dean like he should, he always believed in his big brother from a young age of two. Always wanted to be just like his Dean, mimic his every move, looking up to him like he's his hero. All that came crashing down when Dean lied to him about Gadreel, then the whole thing with Sinclair he feels betrayed.

He now knows how Dean felt when he betrayed him by going off with Ruby, starting the end of the world by letting Lucifer free. Then the whole thing with Dean being in purgatory, like Sam knew where Dean was. He did look for him for three months when he disappeared after killing Roman, he tried everything he could to find his big brother always coming up at a dead end. After doing spells, asking Demons (well, more like torturing them) to get answers he seek, and no-one knew where Dean was or even if he still alive. He really thought his brother was in heaven with his mom and dad, which was something that Dean deserves to have a happy afterlife. Feeling like a failure he ran as far away as he possibly could, didn't know where he was heading too just as long it took him away from the pain. That was when he hit the dog with the car, taking it to the vets, meeting Amelia falling in love with her. Even though he had a good thing going on in his life then, his thoughts were still with his big brother. Amelia did help Sam fill some of the hole in his heart just a little of it, the rest couldn't be filled cause he didn't have his brother's love to fill it. If Dean only knew how close Sam came to being suicidal after everything that happen, he would've came back and kick Sam's ass, still might kick it.

Then listening to Dean saying how much of a brother Benny was to him was a stab in Sam's heart that hurt like hell. Hearing Dean telling him that Benny has never let him down, was always there to have his back hurt Sam deeply. It was like telling Sam they were no longer brothers, that their brotherhood was a lied dead even never to be again. Sam thought his heart could never hurt so much as he did then, now this hurt is a whole new kind of hurt, the kind that can't be fix in one day. Too much lying has been done on his part, if the tables were turned Dean would shoved it in his face. He just can't get past the anger he's feeling, it's been building since he found out about Gadreel possessing him.

The more Sam thought about all the crap that's been done to him by his brother, the anger came back in him like a forest fire out of control. Ready to destroyed anything in it's way burning hot like lava running down the hill side, destroying everything in it's path as he continued to burned bright and hot. Taking a deep breath to calm the anger in him before he had to hit something or someone, Sam took deep calming breaths he could mustard at the moment. Finally when the burn finally stop he looked at the door, waiting for it too open so he could lash out at his brother. Knowing that it wouldn't be happening since Dean is giving him space, he talked in a small anger voice at his brother.

"It's okay for you to treat me like a piece of shit if I do something wrong, getting angry, feeling betrayed, not trusting me anymore. But it's not okay for me to feel the same towards you, after what you did to me, I'm suppose to say it's okay and move on, not happening Dean."

Grabbing the bottle of painkillers more roughly then he should, he opening it palming two white pills. Slamming the bottle on the knight stand he grabbed the glass, drinking all the liquid he so wanted to throw the glass across the room. Thinking better of it he place it next to the bottle on the table by the bed, leaning against the bed rest he tried to calm himself down before he went to sleep.

~~~SPN~~~

As Dean returned to the cabin after getting his duffel and blanket from the trunk of the Impala, he could hear Sam talking in a low angry voice. Knowing it was about him he went to the door to listen, he couldn't hear what was said only the anger in the tone. Leaning his head against the door he could feel a sob in his chest, he has really hurt his Sammy this time around that it made him feel like shit. Yes he has hurt Sam in the past but most of it was because of what his little brother did, taking sides with a Demon, letting him rot in Purgatory, having his heaven without him. All that has hurt Dean deeply that he had a hard time getting over it, he thought Sam hated him so much that he would be happy without him. Now hearing Sammy saying that he don't hate him gave him hope to fix this, he would give Sam the space he needs to think things over for what happen. He knew it won't be easy and some things will be said out of anger, knowing that it's going to hurt like hell when it does and it will. He will try to keep his own anger at bay if that is even possible, when he gets angry things come out that would hurt Sam more. That is something he can't let happen no matter how angry he gets, cause this is not about him this is about getting Sammy trust back in him.

With that in mind he headed to his room dropping his duffel on the bed, putting the blanket at the foot of the bed. He went through his bag for his sleeping clothes and toiletries, he headed to the bathroom to take his shower. Stripping out of his clothes he stepped into the bathtub closing the curtain, turning on the hot water he stood under letting the hot liquid relax his tense muscles. As he stood there he could feel all the failures he has done be wash away, taking the soap and clothe he suds himself up washing all the grime off of him. As he rinse himself off he felt the mark on his arm, he could feel the burn coming from it. Even with the blade back in Kansas he could feel the pulled it still has, getting out of the shower he wipe the mirror with his hand. Looking at himself in the mirror he didn't like what he saw, instead of seeing him he saw all the failures he has ever done to his Sammy. It made him angry that he hurt the one person that means the most to him, he would do anything to get that person back into his life. Drying himself off with the towel, putting his boxers on, sleeping pants and shirt, he headed for his room. Lying on top of the blanket he spread on the bed since he had no sheets yet, he thought on what he had to do tomorrow when he wakes up. As he went through the list in his mind on what is first, he eyes couldn't stay open anymore and he drifted off to sleep.

~~~SPN~~~

Walking down the long corridor like a tiger stalking it's prey in the forest, Dean cautiously looked around his surroundings to see if anyone was in the shadows. Advancing down the hallway with weapon in hand he kept his senses keen, to anything that might come out and attack him. Reaching the end of the hallway he looked to his left then to the right, trying to decide which way he should go for his search. Hearing movement to his right he headed down in that direction, as he reach a door that was to his right he kicked it open. Glancing inside the room it looked familiar to him like he's been here before, seeing no one he kept on his search for the monster he was hunting. Reaching a junction he carefully looked around the corner, seeing his prey leaning against the wall he waited until the right moment.

Carefully he kept a close eye on the man who looked like he was trying to decide on what too do, when he looked in his direction he would hid himself around the corner. Peering again to see him moving slowly in the opposite direction, he advance slowly and quietly so he wouldn't let him know he was there. Slowing his advance as the man looked around the corner holding a knife in his left hand, standing behind he waited until he made his move, which he did have to wait too long. Seeing the person turning they meet eye to eye before he swung the hammer, just missing do to him ducking just in time. Impaling the hammer hook into the wall where the man's head was just seconds ago, letting go of the handle he stood to see what he would do. Feeling the blade to his throat he smirk seeing if he would slice his skin, feeling the knife shaking against him he waited to see what would happen. As the knife was taken away he stood there glaring at him, with his eyes going black he thrust the blade into the guy's abdomen. Feeling the blood flowing over his hand he relish the feeling of power, the mark burned on his arm for more lust for blood. Looking into his eyes he saw the light go out of them, blood flowing from his mouth, color going from his face. He stood there and laughed as the man died before he hit the floor, standing over the body he felt the surge of power flowing through him. Taking a deep breath to relish that power he close his eyes, he let the power take over which wanted more of the man's blood. Opening his eyes he glanced down at the dead body at his feet, with blood pooling around the forum as it flowed from the man. Feeling the power leaving him as he kept his eye on the blood flowing freely, he couldn't keep his eyes off the liquid as the life force drain the man at his feet. Turning his cold black eyes at the man laying at his feet gasping for air, with fascination he watch as he gasp for air while blood flowed from his mouth. Hearing the gagging sound as a man drowning in water excited him, as he struggle to catch a breath that wouldn't come to him. When he tried to take a deep breath a cough would come instead, as he cough blood splatter against the wall and floor. Glancing up at the man's face his cold black eyes went back to the emerald green, something about him looks so familiar to him like he knew him. As the power left him and the mark stop burning white hot, the blade dropped from his hand when he realized what he'd just done. With wide shock eyes he looked at the body of his little brother, he just stabbed the one person that he protected his whole life.

When his legs could move he was kneeling next to his Sammy, with shaking hands his search for a pulse. Holding his fingers on the side of the neck, holding his breath as he waited, what felt like years before he felt a weak, sluggish pulse. That was getting weaker by the seconds as the blood kept flowing from the wound, taking his jacket off he push down hard to stop the flow of blood. Hearing a weak moan and movement he turned his eyes to look into the half mass eyes of his little brother. Seeing that he was having a hard time keeping them open, Dean started to talk to Sam to keep him alive until Cas got there.

"I know it hurts Sammy, just stay with me a little longer okay little brother? Hey, I said keep your eyes on me." Hearing another soft moan as he pressed down harder, he kept up the talking to keep his brother going. "I know it hurts Sammy but I have to keep pressure on the wound, I will get you all fix up wait and see little brother. Hey don't talk, just try to breathe, Cas will be here to help get you fit up."

Seeing that his little brother wanted to say something, he lowered his head to his lips so he could hear. What he heard crush Dean's heart to dust and brought tears to his eyes, his little brother was dying and he was the one who did this to him. Hearing Sam saying it's not his fault for what happen, that he loved his older brother, before he stop breathing brought a sob to Dean's chest. Lifting himself up just a little so he's mere inches from Sam's face, he watch as his little brother closed his eyes for the last time. Panic flowed through Dean as his brother's body what life less, watching as his chest lifted one last time. Lifting his brother into his arms feeling how cold he already is instead of the warmth that is normally there, placing his head in the crock of his neck and shoulder he cried and screamed.

Jolting from the bed Dean looked around his surroundings to see he was in Jim's cabin, glancing down at his shirt he didn't see his brother's blood. Rushing to the door and before his mind could think straight he was standing next to Sam's bed, he had to make sure his brother was alive and well. Glancing at his abdomen he just saw the clean white gauze instead of blood, reaching to touch Sam he had to make sure he was warm and not cold. Feeling the warmth and heart beat calm Dean's nerves down, taking a shaking breath he could feel the tears coming only to blink them away. Hearing movement in the bed he kick himself for waking him, carding his hand through his hair in a gentle manor lured Sam back to a deep sleep. As his breathing even out snuggling into the pillows he was fast a sleep in no time, watching his brother sleep Dean got up on shaking legs quietly left the room. Closing the door quietly as not too wake his little brother from his sleep, walking over to the couch he sat down before his knees gave way. Taking a deep breath to calm his shaking nerves from the nightmare he just had, placing his head in his hands he lets the tears come to help him calm himself down. Once when he got the tears to stop he wipe his face with his hands, taking a shaky breath he tried to figure out what he just saw.

There was no way he would ever kill his own brother no matter what, and why would he have black eyes when he did kill him. None of this made sense to him since he's not a Demon, even though in his dream with the dream root, his Demon half told him that would happen when he died. Right now he's a live and breathing so why would he dream this, looking at the Mark he wonder if that had anything to do with it. What every the reason was for having that horrible dream it won't be happening, he would rather kill himself then hurting or killing his brother.

Hearing a growling noise brought Dean out of his dark thoughts, looking at his watch he was as little shock to see it being eight o'clock. He never slept in this long in who knows how long it's been from the last time, getting up he check the fridge for some breakfast he could make. Seeing only a little milk and two eggs left he didn't want to take them, would leave them for Sam to eat when he gets up. Making some coffee for the both of them he went to his room to get dress, when he returned the coffee was done pouring himself a cup of the hot liquid. Sitting at the table he took paper and pen from the draw, to write Sam a note and for a grocery list for food for a week or so. Grabbing his coat and keys he place the note next to the coffee pot, grabbing some sheets, pillow cases, clothes of his and Sam's he headed into town. First stop would be at the Laundromat to start the laundry washing while he eats, headed to the diner across the street he sat down to eat some breakfast. After paying for his food he headed back to put the items into the dryers, putting in four quarters in each dryer he headed for the Impala.

Heading to the Grocery store he pulled into the parking lot finding a open spot next to the door, grabbing one of the carts next to the car he headed inside. Once inside he saw the Bakery/Deli to his left as he walked into the building, heading to the department he saw some Pecan Pie on the table. Feeling his mouth water for some he was about to grab the pie, thinking better of it since Sam is allergic to nuts he took the Chocolate Cream Pie. Heading to the Deli counter he looked over the meat and cheese selection, getting a pound of Roast Beef, Turkey, Ham and Yellow American cheese. His next stop was the meat isle he looked over what kind of Beef, Steaks, and Chicken they had to offered. Getting two T-Bone steaks, ground beef, a package of skinless boneless Chicken Breast, sausage, bacon, he headed down the isles to get can goods. Getting everything that he and Sam would like to eat, even grabbing some wheat bread that Sam loves so much. Stopping off a the produce section to get Sam his rabbit food, alone with apples, oranges, peaches and grapes he headed for the check out. Getting all the food on the counter, paid for and bagged he headed back to the Impala; placing all the groceries in the trunk he shook his head. He ended up having 15 bags of groceries to carrying into the cabin when he gets back, along with the laundry he still had to collect from the dryers.

Getting all the laundry folding and place in the baskets, he could feel someone was watching him from outside. Glancing without moving his head he saw a man standing by the window watching him, placing the basket on the cart he rolled it out to the car. Taken a gander he didn't see the man any where around, knowing that he had to be close by watching him ready to follow him back to Sam. There's no way he would allow anyone to get near his brother right now, not on his watch he will take care of it now. Rolling the cart back into the building grabbing a plastic bag, he put all the trash in the bag taking it to the trash dumpster in the back. Hiding in the shadows he didn't have too wait to long before the man came looking for him, waiting for him too pass by before he would attack him. As he walked past Dean is when he made him move, slamming him into the brick wall with enough force it took the wind out of his lungs. Glaring at the man before him he was going to find out what he wanted, knowing what his answer would be wouldn't be any help for him at the moment.

"Why are you following me?"

Seeing his eyes go coal black and the smirk on his face, made Dean's blood boil.

"I don't have beef with you Winchester, just tell me where your brother is."

"The Hell I will tell you where my brother is, why do you want to hurt him he didn't do anything wrong?"

Dean knew why they were looking for Sammy since Crowley had told him but he wanted to hear it from the lowlife in front of him.

"We want to kill him to show you not to mess with the order of Demon hood, you killed our Queen so we are going to kill your brother."

"I'm the one who killed your so-called Queen so come after me not my brother, or are you all to chicken to come fight someone who has the first blade and the Mark of Cain."

Seeing the Demon flinch when he talked about the Mark and Blade Dean got his answer.

"So you are afraid of me, that's good, 'cause if you mess with my brother you will be answering to me. I won't think twice putting the blade through your heart and watch you die, on second thought who needs the blade I got the knife right here."

Taking the knife from his waistband he plunge the blade into his heart, watching the white glow as the Demon died he felt the mark burn for more. Hearing voices coming his way he grab the body pulling it behind the dumpster, waiting on the other side he listen carefully to see who it was.

"I told you not to take your eyes off of him for a second."

"I'm not his baby-sitter, dumb ass, you could have been watching him too. Instead you were watching that human female with lust in your eyes."

"Don't go and blame me for your stupidity that you can't keep an eye on one Demon, when our leader finds out he's going to roast you."

"Will you two be quiet and find that stupid moron so we can leave, can't find Winchester if he finds out we are hunting his brother we are d-"

The two Demons turned around when their comrade stop talking, both stood in place to see Dean stabbing their friend. Watching him fall to the ground dead they looked at the older hunter with fear in their eyes. Trying to find a way out which they couldn't since Dean was blocking them, they both stood their ground for a fight the man before them. They both knew that one or both wouldn't leave there alive, so they had to fight their way out two against one. With the favor in Dean's corner and they knew it.

Dean looked at the two Demon that stood there knowing that they were scared of him, he could take them both with no problems at all. The fight wasn't much of one since one of the Demon coward before him, giving him the chance of killing the other one before going for him. Lifting the Demon to his feet the hunter glared at him, he was going to let this Demon know that his brother is off limits.

"I'm going to let you live cause you are not worth a fight, but, if I ever see you any where near my brother I will end you. You are going to go too your leader and tell him to leave my brother alone, if he keeps this up I will hunt his sorry ass down and kill him myself. Too make my point that I'm being serious about this, just take a look around four against one and I don't have a mark on me."

Taking the knife he slice the Demon chest with a deep cut, going all the way to the bone feeling the burn he wanted to end him here. He had to make his point to the other Demons to leave Sammy alone once and for all.

"Now get out of my sight before I change my mind, I SAID GO!"

Watching the Demon run for his life to get away from him he could feel the mark burn for more, glancing at the Demons on the ground he so wanted to give into it. Breathing heavily to calm the rage in him which was hard too do, hearing the Demon said they wanted to kill his Sammy was to much. Thinking of his brother cool the fire inside of him enough to make him leave the alley, walking back to the Impala he looked around to make sure no-one was watching. Getting into the Impala he made sure no one was following him back to the cabin, to be on the safe side he drove around before heading in the right direction.

Pulling up to the cabin Dean saw Sam sitting on the front porch, with a cup of coffee in his hand. Taking deep breaths to calm the fire that was still burning inside of him from the Demons, he didn't want Sam to think it towards him in any way. Getting out of the car he walked to the trunk opening it up, grabbing some bags he walked up to the steps and stop the look on Sam told him everything.

Stepping on to the porch towards the door he stop when Sam asked him a question.

"Dean, I can see that you are pissed as hell but it's not going to change my mind on how I'm feeling."

"Sam, I'm not mad at you at all, little brother, I was attack by four Demons who wanted to kill you. I killed three of them, the fourth one I gave him a lesson he won't forget, told him to go back to his leader telling him to leave you the Hell alone."

Before Sam could reply he walked into the cabin to put the groceries on the table, turning around he walked back out to get the rest. What got him upset is seeing Sam grabbing some of the heavy bags, rushing up to him to stop his brother he stop when he glared at him. Letting Sam go with the bags he grab the rest of them, placing them on the table he went back out to get the laundry. Placing the laundry by the bedroom doors he turned to see Sam looking at him, knowing that his brother wanted to know what happened.

~~~SPN~~~

Being pulled from his sleep from the pain flaring from his chest wounds, Sam moaned softly to himself as he tried to open his heavy eye lids. Taking a gander at his surroundings he saw that he was in the bedroom, not in the cage of Sinclair's Mansion being man handle again. He's been having the dreams for a week now since it happen, it would always start with him hiding from him, too Lucifer torture, to Sinclair touching him. They always went in that order every time he had them every night, they have been getting worse the last few nights. By the time he wakes up from them he's exhausted, sweaty, feeling all the muscles tense up, until he laid there calming himself down by taking deep breaths.

Maybe he should talk to Dean about them like he used too when he was little, it always help him deal with what his dreams were about. This time around his dreams were cause of him for leaving him there, so that sick bastard could have his way with Sam. Not wanting to think of the dream he just had since it's been the worse one, all the others didn't go into details like the one he just had. Lucifer part wasn't so bad as the other ones; the one with Sinclair has been the worse by far. He can still feel his hands on his body touching him, doing thing against his will having no power to stop it. Shaking that thought out of his mind before it freaks him out, he slowly lifted himself with his elbow to a sitting position. Carefully moving his legs so not to pull on his stitches or the bruises, he sat there to catch his breath before he stood up. Taking it slow he carefully and gently lifted his sore body up, biting his bottom from the scream he felt coming. His whole entire body hurt like Hell like he was shoved into a tree, well he was shoved into a tree, then a rock, then the ground. Moving slowly to the door he felt like a 90 year old man, shuffling his feet as not to aggravate his body anymore then what is already. Reaching the door he slowly open leaning on the door frame taking deep breaths, he felt like he ran the mile in that short distance from the bed to the door. Heading to the bathroom he closed the door behind him, taking care of business he undress to take a shower to run hot water over him. Undoing the gauze so he won't get it wet, he turned the hot water on before entering the bathtub. Stepping in he let the hot water spray his back, taking a sigh of relief when his muscles started to relax. Being careful not to get his stitches wet taking the clothe with soap, he slowly lathered himself up with soap suds. Skipping his chest he will take a wet clothe for that after his shower, getting his hair wash he linger a little longer letting the hot water relax him. Finishing up he got out of the tube too dry himself off the best he could, taking the wet cloth with a little soap he carefully washed his chest.

Wrapping the towel around his waist he headed for the door, feeling better after the show he didn't feel so stiff as before. Opening the door he headed into the living room to look for his brother, seeing no one he frowned and became concern. Walking up to the counter he saw the coffee pot half full of coffee, knowing that Dean was here earlier were is he now he looked around and saw the note. Reading his brother's hand writing 'went to do laundry and grocery shopping, be back as soon as I can.' despite himself he had too smile he's brother always left him notes telling him where's he's going. Making some toast and oatmeal he sat at the table to eat his breakfast, putting the dishes in the sink to wash later he poured himself some more coffee. Heading outside he sat down on the chair by the door to get some fresh air, seeing how bright it was he looked at his watch was shock to see it was 10 am.

"Must have been more tired then I thought to sleep in this late in the day, think I better go get some clothes on before Dean shows up."

He said to himself as he smile wickedly thinking he should stay in the towel, thinking better of it he went back into the bathroom to wrapped the gauze around the wound. Heading into the bedroom he grabbed some sweats and a T-shirt, noticing some of his clothes gone he knew Dean took them. Heading back outside he sat back down on the chair waiting for his brother's returned, as he did he couldn't stop his mind from going back to their talk last night.

Lost in his thoughts he didn't hear the Impala pulling up until he was park in front of the cabin, looking up he could see that Dean was piss off big time. Taking a deep breath he ready himself for a fight that he sure knew was coming, seeing Dean try to calm himself down he became concern on what is going to happen. Keeping a close eye on his older brother as he walked up to the porch, seeing him smiling tightly to him he ready for a fight.

Stepping on to the porch towards the door he stop when Sam asked him a question.

"Dean, I can see that you are piss as hell, it's not going to change my mind on how I'm feeling."

"Sam, I'm not mad at you at all, little brother, I was attack by four Demons who wanted to kill you. I killed three of them the fourth one I gave him a lesson he won't forget, told him to go back to his leader telling him to leave you the Hell alone."

Sam was too shocked to answer his brother as he walked inside to put the groceries away, shaking himself out of his stupider he headed for the car. Grabbing some of the bags he winced when the movement pulled on the stitches, taking his time he walked back to the building glaring at Dean as he tried to help. Walking up to the table he slowly lifted them onto the table top waiting for his brother to returned, watching him as he left again to get the laundry he stood were he was until he got some answers.

Waiting for Dean too turned around after dropping the baskets by the door; he needed answers on what he just said. Dean saw Sam staring at him as he closed the door, walking up to the table he started to put the groceries away. Feeling Sam's eyes on him he stop what he was doing, turning to his brother he looked him straight in the eyes.

"When I finishing up doing the laundry I felt someone was watching me, when I glance over I saw a man my height looking at me. After I was done folding the clothes putting them in the basket, I rolled the cart out side putting them in the back seat. When I looked again the guy was gone so I search for him, walking to the back of the building I hid in the shadows waiting for him. Didn't have to wait to long for the moron to come looking for me, when I confronted him he said he wanted nothing to do with me. He was looking for you so he could kill you and go brag about it, I told him you are off limits and to leave you alone. Stupid as he is even though he was scared of me he tried to attack me, taking the knife I stabbed him in the heart that is when his other friends came around."

"They wanted me to tell them where you were I wasn't going to say, so I killed two of them while the other one coward in the corner. I slice him in the chest telling him to go talk to your leader on what I said, that no one will be hurting or hunting my brother or get my wrath if they did."

"Dean, you took on four Demons by yourself, you could have been killed, that was a stupid thing to do."

Sam didn't mean for it to come out so harsh as it was, it scared him too think his older brother fought four Demons by himself.

"I was protecting you, Sammy, if that is stupid then so be it, there is no way in Hell I will let them touch you again. They are angry cause I killed their Bitch Queen so they want to take it out on you, won't be happening with me around glad you weren't there Sam."

"So you're saying that I'm weak and can't take care of myself now, I was doing just fine until that Demon attack me. I held my ground too him was doing really good until he hit me with a branch, which he grabbed from me pushing hard enough to jam it in my chest. That is how he got the upper hand Dean not cause I was weak, he was too fast and quick that it took me by surprise."

"Sam, I was not saying that you are weak cause you are not, at the moment you are hurt and injured from the attack. I could see how stiff you still are from the abused you received, I didn't want you there to get hurt anymore or worse killed."

"So sorry if I'm being overly protective at the moment I can't help it Sammy, that is what big brother's suppose to do keep little brother's safe. That is something I just can't get rid of at a drop of the hat, so shot me for keeping you around a little longer."

"Dean-" Sam began, taking a deep breath to calm his nerves before he said anything else. "Four Demons attack you to get to me cause they are piss, don't expect me to sit around to let this happen. I'm still mad as hell at you for what happen, that don't mean I don't worry about you 'cause I do."

"Sam, I know you are mad at me keep bringing it up all the time getting tired of hearing it, I have fought more then two Demons before by myself without your help-"

Dean didn't get to finish when Sam lashed out at him, leaving the older brother kicking himself.

"You got to be kidding me, Dean, it's okay for you to keep throwing shit in my face, but it's not okay for me to keep bring your shit up. You have been bringing me down so many times about Ruby, Demon Blood, picking her over you, leaving you in Purgatory for a year, saying that Benny been a better brother to you then I have. Saying that you can't trust me anymore for having your back, that we are no longer brother's cause of it, throwing away our brotherhood like it didn't matter anymore."

"You chose a Angel and a Vampire over me who you could have trusted instead of me, now that it's being thrown in your face you want me to drop it. Guess what it's not going to happen Dean so get over yourself, how does it feel like being at the end of the blaming stick."

Sam was breathing hard when he finished his rant at his brother, wishing he didn't do it since his chest is hurting like hell. He was not going to show weakness too Dean so he can add it to Sam's failures, waiting for a fight with his brother he stood his ground to Dean. He could see how piss his older brother is at the moment, with the tense jaw, fist clutch tightly, knuckles going white, all signs of a big brother ready to explode. What scared Sam the most was how calm Dean sounded when he talked to him, he heard his brother like this before when he left Sam at the side of the road.

"You are right, Sam, I couldn't let that stuff go and wanted to hurt you for it, so I kept bringing it up just to make you feel like shit. I knew telling you that Benny was a better brother then you would hurt, I saw the hurt and it felt good to me to cause it. I felt betrayed when you choose Ruby over me of all people to do that, it had to be my little brother who I protected his whole life. That went out the window when you walked out that door, it crushed me so bad that it hurt like someone stab me with a knife."

"To hear that you choose a girl over me for a whole year while I was in Purgatory, fighting for my life to get out of there so I can get to you. Benny was there for me when I needed someone to watch my back, even getting out he was there for me while you had your emo trips. So yeah Sam I know how you feel now and I don't like, I can't take back the hurt from the past that I did to you. I can only give you the support and distance you want now, so when I put the groceries away I will go and stay in town."

Turning his back on his brother he started to put the things away he brought, didn't want Sam to see the hurt he was feeling at the moment. Feeling a hand on his shoulders stop him from his task, looking over his shoulders he looked into the big brown eyes of his little brother.

"Dean, I don't want you to leave cause we are mad at each other, saying things that will hurt like hell just to get back. I know you are having a hard time letting go of the past, just like now I'm having a hard time letting go of what happen. We have to work this out some how if we are going to be brothers, throwing this shit at each other, walking out on each other, this won't help at all."

"Yes, I'm still angry Dean I have a right to be especially after what happen to me, what I went through with that sick bastard. What he did to me-which I can't go into just yet I need time."

Sam didn't want to sound like he couldn't take care of himself cause he can, he still needed his big brother around to be there for him. He didn't want too loose his brother again that happen to many times, and look where it got him in the past years screwed up and doing stupid things. Waiting for a reply he help Dean put the groceries away, only to feel a warm gently hand on his arm leading him to the chair. His brother put the rest of the stuff away getting something ready for lunch, putting the laundry away before he sat down to eat lunch with his Sammy.

Dean knew it would take time for Sam to come forward to talk about what happened, he will be there for him when he is ready to do so. At least Sam made the first move to start the healing process to their relationship, now it's going to take leap and bounds to finished the healing. He will be there every step of the way helping his brother, so they can get their brotherhood back in order.