OK, sorry I'm so late but here is the next chapter~! I finally have inspiration for this and will publish another chapter tonight to make up for my neglect on this story. I'm so glad people like this and I love writing it~! In this chapter I make fun of writing style that I am plenty guilty of myself, so , no hard feelings?
"Huh . . ." Noda went "Maybe that will work! Hey guys! I found something interesting." The normal transition began occurring toward Noda's computer with different degrees of discontent on everyone's faces.
"Define interesting." Yuri prompted.
"Read the summary." Noda replied, Yuri did.
The Supah Dupah Okashi Desu Ne? Angel Beats Adventure!
"The super duper this is weird isn't it Angel Beats Adventure?" Matsushita translated.
"This is going to be stupid" Shiina interjected.
By: CloeisMoe
"Moe? What is that Onii san?" Hatsune asked.
"I, don't know actually." Otonashi replied. Noda raised his hand.
"Basically you're talking about the kind of girl Yui is."
"Are you hitting on my fiancée?" Hinata asked with suspicion, eyes squinted.
"Hell no man, you can have her." He replied. "I'm just saying that is what Moe is." Hinata relaxed and Yui patted him on the head with a big smile on her face and a wag of her tail.
Summary: Just a random Angel Beats fic my 7 year old niece wrote, it's not serious like the other fics are. This is a retelling of the first episode of Angel Beats.
"It is confirmed the other fics are serious, and my faith in humanity has dimmed." Takamatsu sighed.
"Well, maybe if we read this believing this is not meant to be serious, maybe it won't be so bad." Yuri offered. "Please begin Noda."
"No one beat me up, OK?"
Youzoolu Oh-Toe-Nashee
"Holy shit that's bad spelling." Noda exclaimed." I have better spelling than this when I'm half awake."
Woak ahp in duh steps 2
"2?! How friggin lazy can these people be?" Matsushita asked.
A mawl. Next to him was a girl with an oozee gun pointed at another girl with lafender hare.
"Soo, a lavender rabbit?" Yuusa asked. "This seven ear old needs to use spell check, but, it's not horrible so far.
Youree Nakamura pointed an oozee gun at Tachee-Bana Kanaday
"I knew you people were insane "morons" but . . ." Kanade started "An uzi? Really? Is that really necessary?"
"We'd never be that insane." Yuri mumbled before face palming.
"And what is up with this taking place in a mall?" Fujimaki asked.
Youzoolu ran away into the mall because he cud tell that Youree was a saiko bitch and Kanaday was krayzee becus she was just standing dere. Wich is all troo.
Yuri's eyebrows were raised.
"She knows about uzis, knows swear words and she is supposedly seven? Also, I am not a psycho."
All of the sudden a bunch of people coughed at once.
Oh Toe Nashee went in the mawl and he sees No,Duh with a Hell Bird in his hands
Damn, that's pretty wicked" Fujimaki admitted."
"They probably meant halberd, but like 75% of this fic, cannot friggin spell the right word." Noda sighed.
No,Duh sweengs the hell bird and shouts "Use flame thrower! And insinurates Oh-Toe Nashee.
"Still better than being chopped alive." Otonashi said nonchanctically.
Oh-Toh-Nashee woke up in the mawl sekyoritee ophiss surrounded by a bunch of reely weerd peepole. Dey were all dressed in soots with skurts for the laydees wile dey did weerd shit.
"Which pretty much describes what we do in ALL of these stories." Irie chimed in, cringing at the memory of the last fic.
Youree sat up on the desk and crossed her legs as she yushalee does, flashing a bit of pantee
"No."
"OK, Yooee, Heenahta, Matsoosheeta, Takamatsoo,Oyama, Nowie, and Sheenah, Comens Operayshun TOILET, be Totalee Obnockshuss Idiyots and Loot Everyone's movie Tickets.
"That is some horrible name spelling" Otonashi said.
"Wait, W- , Uggghh, Well . . .We would be the ones to do that at a mall wouldn't we?"
"Hell no! We have a lot more class than that!" Yuri argued, Iwasawa snorted.
"Class? We played music while you used fans to take people's meal tickets. Hinata's right, we would do that in a mall."
Heenahta swallowed a hand fool of pills-
"Wait wait, WHAT?!"
(Psst, I'm trying 2 keep dis realistic gies. Heenahta was a total druggee be4 dying so he has 2 be duh same now.)
Hinata was shaking and gritting his teeth while Yui grabbed his hand, patted his head and said "It's alright Hideki, you're not like that anymore, and even if you were I'd still love you." Takeyama flicked his glasses.
"Drug addiction is a condition of the body. Once the body dies, the craving for nicotine goes away."
B4 pushing a chubby Yooee who was in a wheel chare out of the room
Yui glared at the computer.
Nowie had his head down, as he was horribly insekyure becuz he wuz not reely his brudder or wutever I did not understand his past store very well.
"I was not insecure!" Naoi yelled. "My right to live as an individual was ta-" he stopped because Otonashi put an arm around him.
"It's alright Naoi, it's alright." Naoi calmed down and leaned into Otonashi while wiping his tears away
Followed by duh rest of the crue, hoo still had wutever problems dey had while alive
"Even if they were not stated in this, Angel Beats thing, why did they not try to make something up?" Fujimaki asked.
"You want this chick to try and guess and horribly simplify what our lives were like?" Shiori asked
"Yeah, that would go lovely with her "trying to be supah edgy" personality."Hisako interjected.
"Wut duh fuck is goeeng on here?" Yousoolu asked.
"I know I over react sometimes, but this is a bit much" Otonashi said.
Suddenly TK and Sheeyouree jumped in his face.
"Welkum to A.S..S!" they yelled in Southern accents
"ASS?" Oh-toe Nashee asked.
"Angel's Sucha Shithead" TK replied
"I knew we had strong misunderstandings but, is this really how you all thought of me?" Kanade asked.
"No, we just didn't trust you" Otonashi said chuckling nervously.
"I thought we sucked at picking names . .. "Ooyama inserted.
"Why do we have southern accents?" Shiori asked
"Well Shiori." Hisako began, "You do have quite the fascination with Kansai-ben as seen in your journals. " Yui giggled at this
"That's bitting me bavk in the butt now isn't it?" Shiori asked.
"Yes," Youree continyoud, "This is A.S.S.. I am Youree, the people in front of you r Sheeyouree and TK, the group's hill billees
"What's a "hill billy"?" Shiori asked, TK snapped his fingers,and pointed.
"Country bumpkin, hill billies are white simple minded folk" he replied . Shiori scrunched her face up and then shook her head and face palmed with a sigh. "I thought I looked cool" she mumbled, Miyuki placed a comforting arm around her friend and Shiori nuzzled closer to her friend's boobs, causing a blush and a face of annoyance to form on the drummer's face.
"TK is a danser and Sheeyouree is the basist of the band Girls With Living Poptart Kitties
I'd love to hear how that name was made" Yuusa said sarcastically.
"Becuz u know aim all about dat Base, bout dat base , no Trebble" Sheeyouree started singing.
"Now I'm singing some lame simple minded song?" Shiori grumbled. Iwasawa quickly shook her head, wheeled to her computer and put on Mehgan Trainor's All About That Bass. After the song which TK translated once again, the crowd looked at each other
"Despite the slightly conflicted message of the song, it's pretty catchy" Shiori admitted.
"Yeah, yeah, sit down Sheeyouree." Youree sed dismissivlee Next we hab Eewasawa who is an alkohawlic bcuz her dad was 1 in her past lyfe."
I would develop object sexuality with my guitar before stooping to such disgusting levels." Iwasawa sneered
Eewasawa Masamy sat on the table, half of her suit buttons open and tie undone as she drank beer and winked at Oh-Toh Nashee b4 wiggling her titties a bit.
"Hhhhhhuuuuuggggghhhhhhhh" the guitarist heeved
"Seriously this seven year old is scaring me." Yuri's sister said, Yuri nodded in agreement.
"Nest to her is Heesako, A.S.S.'s gambler, olympic star, star gitarist, and the only Ayshan girl in this groop bcuz she is the onlee 1 with squinty eyes
"She's a racist too now." Hisako mumbled.
"Next we have Meeyookee who is a bisexual tease, Seriously, when she isn't playing the drums, she's hitting on sum1. Meeyookee crawled on the tayble to Oh Toh Nashee and smirked
"Does anyone have a death note?" Miyuki asked.
"Lastly we have Usa who is part of the mawl's acshuall sekyuritee , she covers A.S.S.'s asses when our stoopid shit gets out of hand,she uses scissors as a last reesort."
Half the men in the room shivered at the mention of Yuusa and scissors
"I'd prefer to not use my scissors, or, that, side of me, to ever defend people" Yuusa declared.
"I guess this is better than anxiety ridden Yuri" the SSS leader said weakly.
"U 4got about me!" a voice yelled.
"Oh yeah, " Youree nodded Taquellama is our foreign IT speshalist with a huge self luv complex. Spanish s his first language and he can KO dumb peepole by resiting duh longest word in the English Alfabet." Taquellama waved his hsand before going back to his computer,
"So because this person happened to misspell my name with words that happened to be Spanish, she makes me Spanish?" Takeyama said disgusted
So, yor gonna join right?" Youree asked, "I meen, I just sspent the last 8 minutes introdoosing evry1 so u better make it worph my time."
I'm not THAT lazy."Yuri objected.
Oh-Toh Nashee looked at Youree, den looked back 2 all of duh peepole and shook his hed. "Hell,No, I am not joining you, u peepole are 2 saiko!" he yelled bfore running off.
"Truly anti climatic" Hideki grumbled
"Do I really have to speak like that? " Otonashi asked.
"These last two stories seem to just be authors giving everyone crazy descriptions and then ending the story . . ."Takeyama injected, "May I suggest we find stories that do not do this and actually have action?"
""Sounds good" some people muttered, others nodded, some just headed back to their coputers with their heads down, their faith in humanity dimmed yet again.