Hey babes!

Been awhile. I hope this chapter lives up to your expectations. Been sitting on my computer for awhile collecting dust because I couldn't quite figure out if I was happy with it or not, but I came back to it after a week or so, and it was perfect to me! Leave me some love and let me know how you feel?

I ill love you forever and always.

Kisses,

MD

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek or any part of the franchise. I gain nothing from writing this other than creative satisfaction.

Addy stared listlessly at the food on the tray in front of her. She'd chosen spaghetti, a spinach and arugula salad with a raspberry vinaigrette, garlic bread, and a double-fudge brownie. By all rights, she should be enjoying this. She loved Italian food, and her DNA had spared her a chocolate allergy (which she exploited way too often). She'd even gotten her stoic First to join her for company, which would send her over the moon under normal circumstances.

These were not normal circumstances.

Addy and Spock sat in a bubble of silence surrounded by loud chatter in the mess deck. She couldn't eat. It all tasted like dust in her mouth. She couldn't savor the tang of the tomatoes, and saltiness of the garlic. And she knew she was hungry, but the moment the oregano and noodles had touched her lips she just felt… empty. Hollow. She wasn't hungry anymore.

She wasn't anything.

Addy sighed and pushed her tray away from her, looking out instead at her crew. Her dull blue eyes danced from one animated conversation to the next and the hollow feeling inside her throbbed with a something she couldn't dare examine or she'd be consumed by it and doom them all. Her eyes stung with a pressure that she knew meant tears and she blinked it away and looked back down at the table.

"Adelaide, it is imperative that you eat as much food as you are able," Spock reminded her softly, finally breaking their vow of silence.

"I know," she grunted, not liking the reminder of her impending surrender. With another sigh, she pulled the tray back and tucked in, methodically eating through all of the food as quickly and efficiently as she could. She didn't feel the satisfaction from a full stomach, though. She was just… empty.

"C'mon," she muttered, and Spock stood silently as she grabbed her dirty dishes and disposed of everything before exiting the mess decks. Thanks to her delay she now had just under 20 minutes to finish the rest of what she had left to prepare. Balls. She picked up the pace to her quarters, Spock keeping up with her easily, and it wasn't two minutes before they both passed through the doors.

Spock stood by the doors and watched her silently while Addy headed straight for her communicator. She plucked it up with her lithe fingers then opened a drawer by her work desk where she kept a small roll of tools in case she felt the itch to build something or wanted to help Scotty, or - in this case - take something apart.

"You can come in, ya know," she threw over her shoulder, sitting down at her desk and setting to work. There was a moment of silence before she heard Spock's soft footfalls walking over to her workspace to examine her curiously.

Practiced hands didn't take long to take her communicator in half at the seam, and she gently set it down so both sides were exposed without pulling any wires that were attached still. Her blue eyes flew over through the guts of the small thing in her hands, and she frowned. Where was that small bugger?

"You have done this before," Spock said. Addy spared him a glance through her bangs. His head was tilted slightly to the side in the way she found so adorable and she grinned faintly.

"Well, not with my communicator, since defacing Starfleet property is against regulation, but I've tinkered, yeah. Built my own bike back in Iowa. Was pretty sweet, if I do say so myself," she preened. Her eyes lit up when she found the small translucent circular film inlaid with gold and a couple other metals she couldn't remember off the top of her head. It was this small thing, this flimsy piece that acted like a beacon for the transporters for her ship when she wanted to be beamed back. If she took it with her, she could put it anywhere, and as long as she had something to boost the signal, her ship would be able to find her, and by association, Kodos. That was the plan that they had come up with. The logistics of what tracker to use had been Addy's brain child, but the rest had been Spock's idea.

"I was unaware you held such an interest for the engineering field," Spock said, and Addy's lips tugged a bit more at the amusement she heard. She pulled out her longest pair of tweezers and set to work trying to peel the film off without damaging what made it work.

"Yeah, well, you never asked, so there's that."

She could almost hear his eyes rolling.

"How old were you when you built your bicycle?" Addy snorted.

"Not a bicycle, Spock. In this case, bike is synonymous with motorcycle. And I was just about to turn 16 when I finished the paint job, but the engine was functional right after I was 15. Took me so long because I didn't have a job so I had to do favors for parts or steal them and shit." She shrugged.

"Fascinating," Spock muttered. Addy made a noncommittal sound, not really focused on his response as she'd finally peeled a corner of the tracker off of her communicator and was now working on getting the rest of it off safely. She made a noise of triumph when she pulled it free and held the tweezers up for Spock to look at.

"Face it, I'm the supreme queen of awesome and everything badass in the universe!" Spock quirked an eyebrow at her.

"I do not believe such a moniker exists, and if I were to discover this to be untrue, I do not hold enough data to verify your claim." Addy rolled her eyes, happy at the warmth spreading through her body, filling all the cracks of the hollowness in her gut.

"Ugh, Spock, can't you just, like, for once, go with a joke?" Her First straightened from where she still held the small film in front of his face and looked down at her with a raised eyebrow.

"My apologies. The next time I believe something you say to be humorous, I will make you privy to my thoughts on the matter." Addy barked out a laugh and delicately set down the tweezers and stood up.

"Well goodness, aren't you sassy all of a sudden."

"Negative, Adelaide, I was merely making it known the change of policy when it comes to your puzzling sense of humor." She rolled her eyes, unconvinced, and picked up the tweezers once more, stepping around her First and walking into her bedroom.

"Uh-huh. And that it just came out sounding all snarky was pure chance, right?"

"Correct."

"You're so full of shit, sometimes, Spock," she teased, chuckling as she looked around her room, trying to find something that she could hide the tracker on until she could boost the signal. Clothes were dumb, Kodos would probably rape her again or let someone else rape her, and who knew what would happen to her clothes? Same with jewelery.

"After taking stock of my body's present condition, I can confirm that I am not full of excrement and as such, do not require use of the facilities," he said behind her, sounding mildly offended. She grinned at his expense. She took the small film and placed it on the tip of her forefinger of her right hand, marveling at how small such an important piece of technology was.

She decided to stick it to the back of her ear.

She didn't know what exactly made the film "stick" because there wasn't any adhesive on it, but it seemed firm enough. And now, as long as she kept her hair down and over her right ear, she was pretty sure she could pull this off.

Well. Sort of sure.

Kinda.

She tried not to think about it.

"Well… time to get ready, I guess," she said, and the teasing mood evaporated. Addy hated this. She hated this stiffness between them, hated how they were both dancing around things they wanted to say but wouldn't because both of them were too chickenshit to confront such scary things like feelings.

Ugh. Drama.

"Just… wait here, I'm gonna change," she muttered, not making eye contact with the Vulcan in front of her as she ran in to the closet. She had lots of brightly colored clothes, vibrant and full of life, just like her personality, and it had taken some interesting juggling of her funds to get her favorite name brands. She could almost weep because she had to decide which outfit to sacrifice, but it was a small thing in the scheme of things.

She decided on a thick brown sweater tunic-style top that hit her mid-thigh, a pair of acid washed jeans, and brown leather boots. She finished it off by grabbing a chunky magenta choker with a heart shaped gem over her adam's apple, and a few brightly colored bracelets that she slipped over both her wrists, and a matching pink plastic belt that she fastened over her hips and let hang loose for style more than function. She arranged the collar of her sweater, smoothing out the wrinkles so the lapels that went over her shoulders weren't lopsided and walked out of the closet.

By her account, she had about seven minutes left.

"How do I look?" she asked, giving a little twirl. Spock raised an eyebrow and frowned at her (as much as he could anyway).

"Is that such a pressing concern at the moment?" Addy shrugged.

"Vanity waits for no one." There was a sudden rigidness to his posture that spoke of tension and stress of some sort.

"You want to present yourself in a pleasing light for this criminal and abuser from your past?" Addy blinked at the blatant accusation she heard in his voice and tried to ignore how much that stung. She frowned and dropped her arms limply to her sides.

"What? Fuck, no I don't! None of this is for him, Spock! You think I give a shit about - you - fucking - you think I want him to be more attracted to me than he already is? What a fucking joke!" Spock frowned minutely.

"I do not follow your logic."

"I'm not dressing for… him. I'm dressing for me. I'm dressing to look nice to remind myself that even though I'm about to go to a place where my self-confidence will be attacked and obliterated, there are things about myself that even I can appreciate, despite all the darkness I carry. I dress nice for me, so that I can feel feminine and powerful, and independent that I bought such expensive clothing with money I made by my own means. I don't dress for anyone, Spock. Least of all this shit stain." Spock's head tilted to the side as he puzzled over her words, and she stormed past him, flustered. Her head was still reeling. Where had that even come from?

One minute she was trying to ignore that she was pretty much walking to her doom, and the next she's bickering with Spock and he's being a jerk? Like, what? She had to remind herself to leave her ear alone as she lost herself to her thoughts so that she didn't crush the film hiding against her skin.

She could hear Spock following slowly behind her as she made her way to the nearest transporter room. She ignored him at present, still hurt at how quickly he'd made assumptions about her, especially when he of all people should know better. That was completely atypical of Spock's character.

"Adelaide," Spock spoke beside her. She stubbornly ignored him as they waited for the turbolift.

"Addy," he insisted. She stiffened. He never used her nickname. She peered at him out of the corner of her eyes, crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow.

"I… I do not want you to leave the ship angry with me," he admitted gently. Addy felt her posture relax slightly and sighed.

"Then don't be such a prick out of nowhere. I mean, seriously dude, why would you even ask me if I'm trying to look nice and dress up for Kodos?" Spock dropped his eyes down the floor, his lips pursing.

"I find myself overwhelmed by emotions I have difficulty cataloging and containing. I believe I was attempting to create unrest so as to distract myself from these troubling thoughts." Addy blinked at him and stepped into the lift.

"So… you were creating a fight to push me away so me leaving wouldn't make you as worried?" She watched curiously as his hands tightened slightly. He was still refusing to look at her.

"Your assessment is accurate." Addy couldn't help it, she barked out a laugh, making Spock finally look over at her, his eyes stern and confused.

"Oh Spock that's such a… human thing for you to do." His eyes flashed with something she could almost call shame, and Addy realized how a sentence like that would be the exact wrong thing to say to Spock of all people.

"I am already aware of my shortcomings. I must insist that you refrain from bringing them to my attention," he muttered stiffly. Addy sighed, rolling her eyes..

"Don't be retarded, you know that's not what I meant." Spock said nothing, watching her from the corner of his eyes.

"Ugh. Fine. You're right. Being human and emotional is the worst fucking thing about you. How dare you have anything in common with such a lowly species. What ever could I have been thinking?" A muscle by Spock's mouth twitched as he finally turned his head to face her.

"Adelaide -"

"Forget it," she muttered, brushing past him as the 'lift doors finally opened. His footsteps followed behind her hesitantly.

'I don't want to leave like this...' Addy grumped to herself, turning the last corner to the transporter room. The doors opened easily to a single red-shirted tech looking bored out of his mind. Addy felt an unwilling upturn of her lips when he noticed his superiors and sat up straighter.

"Captain! Commander! I, uh, is there something I can do for you?"

"I need you to send me down to Planet Q for a minute." The tech furrowed his brow.

"I thought we were holding off on the search for a couple more hours..?" Addy smiled warmly. How easy it was to lie. It broke her heart she was still so talented at it. It wasn't a part of herself she was particularly proud of, and not something she enjoyed showing her crew. Her First Officer, especially.

"Yeah, that's not what this is about. There is, quite possibly, the most amazing fair in the whole universe going on down there. I didn't have nearly enough time to check it out. I just need an hour. Maybe two." The transport tech relaxed, and Addy let out a small sigh.

"No problem, Captain. Are you wanting to go with her, sir?" Spock waited just a moment before answering.

"Negative," he said softly. Addy's chest throbbed in pain. It was so stupid, all those petty fights. What was wrong with them? This isn't how she wanted to leave the ship.

She turned to the Vulcan next to her as the tech began prepping the beaming pad. Spock was already watching her. There were so many things she wanted to say, so many things to tell him. But this was neither the time nor place, and so she just ran her baby blues over his face, drinking in the memory of him for strength and the courage to face this without collapsing.

"Watch the ship until I get back," she said lamely, voice barely above a whisper. Spock gave a slow nod, his deep brown eyes smoldering at her, and lightning a fire deep in her belly.

"Yes, Captain," he replied, voice just as soft. She gave him a look, and his lips twitched. "..Adelaide."

"And… apologize to Bones for me. He's gonna…" she trailed off, a sharp pain stabbing her at the thought of her best friend. Was he still angry? If not, he soon would be. Spock tilted his head slightly. Addy's lips trembled.

"Nevermind. He won't want to listen when he finds out," she muttered.

"All ready, Captain," the tech informed her. Addy and Spock blinked. She broke eye contact first, feeling the burn in her eyes that she knew meant tears.

"Yes, perfect, thank you," she responded cheerily, walking up to a spot on the pad and turning around to face the two men. Spock was pressing his lips together so her, they were white. He looked like he was seconds away from ripping her off the pad himself.

She wouldn't give him the chance.

"Energize."

Her body lit up in the familiar gold light, and she felt the pushing and pulling towards all directions. Then, everything was black, the vision of burning brown eyes seared into her mind.

Adelaide wondered as soon as her feet touched solid ground if Kodos was already here. She could almost feel his eyes caressing her skin, appreciating her body. It made her sick. It was a ludicrous idea since how could he possibly know where her tech had programmed her to energize on the planet? But still… it couldn't be ruled out. He'd hacked her entire communications system, who knew what else he could do. She shifted her eyes around the darkness warily.

"Well?" she shouted. "I'm here, just like you asked."

Silence.

So he was waiting to see what her plan was, then. Fine. She could wait. It wasn't like she could do anything without being on his ship, anyway.

Stubbornly, Addy sat down in the grass and began tearing blades out from the ground, ripping them into small pieces to expel some of her nervous energy. She wondered how long it would take her crew to realize she wasn't coming back. They would try to call her communicator, which would get nowhere as it was gutted on her desk in her quarters. Would Spock reveal their plan right away? Or would he wait for her to hack the ship's computer and send back the tracking signal?

Before Addy could decide, she felt a hand come to rest on the crown of her head. She froze, her skin going numb as that voice slid over her neck and down her spine.

"Cutting it a little close, aren't you?"

"You're just impatient," she growled, slapping his hand away and standing up. She was surprised to find that she was almost as tall as him, now. He'd always been gigantic and untouchable in her memories, but now she barely had to lift her eyes to meet his gaze head-on.

His hair was still red, though thinned out and faded in color. But his face was exactly how it haunted her nightmares. Especially his twinkling, emotionless, green eyes. His mouth stretched into an amused grin that did not reach his eyes.

"I've missed you too, precious." Kodos closed the space between them, and ever-so-gently, stroked the smooth skin of her cheek. It took more willpower Addy knew she possessed not to move away and punch him in the gut. The threat over her crew still hung over her head after all.

"Now then, shall we?" he asked, gesturing behind him, away from the lights of the fair and into the black of the night. Addy couldn't help it, the panic was building in her gut again, and she took a couple steps back, her fight-or-flight winning over rationality. Instantly, Kodos' face darkened, and he gripped a handful of her golden curls and yanked her back to him, making her yelp in surprised pain.

"You aren't trying to go back on my generous deal, are you, Adelaide darling?" She had to swallow three times before she could find her voice again.

"No, Kodos. Of course not." He narrowed his eyes distrustfully at her, tightening his hold on her, making her wince.

"Now why don't I believe you?"

"Sounds like a personal problem," she muttered. Pain erupted across her cheek, and Addy had to blink to see she was sprawled out on the ground, Kodos' fist where her jaw had been only moments ago.

"I can see you need more training than I previously thought," he mused, his calm voice at odds with the anger in his eyes. Dread pooled in her torso. There could be anything that thought of his would lead to, none of which she would enjoy.

"Get up," Kodos ordered. Addy wasted no time struggling to her feet, her ears ringing. Without a word, Kodos grabbed her hand, interlacing their fingers and setting off into the dark. Addy followed him numbly, sending a quick glance up, pretending she could see the Enterprise like a cloud in the clear starry sky. She thought of Bones, and his insufferable over protectiveness that she knew really just meant how much he treasured her. Uhura, and how the graceful woman could keep her calm, even in the worst of situations. Sulu, not only the best pilot in the whole fleet, but a close friend willing to fence with her whenever the mood struck. Chekov, and his twinkling eyes. He was one of the only people she'd ever met that made her really work for a

victory in chess. And Spock.

'Oh, Spock...'

Her advisor, always looking out for her when Addy thought she could only rely on herself. Intelligent, witty (though only a few kinds of people understood his brand of humor), and hopelessly complex.

Would she ever see them again?

One could only hope.

Everything was pain. That was what woke her. Pain in her chest, a killer headache, her aching jaw, and what felt like a broken knee. Addy groaned. Fuck. Add a sore throat to that list.

'What happened..?' she thought fuzzily. The last thing she remembered was walking next to Kodos and mourning the loss of her friends. The she'd… what? Beamed! She'd been beamed aboard a ship, and men were waiting for her. They'd been large, with corded muscles in their arms. Kodos had told them something about training, and then the punches had flew, and she'd blacked out.

'Fuck,' Addy closed her eyes. Not like it made a difference. She couldn't tell the difference between closed eyes and open eyes, but for the physical sensation it was so dark.

'Just like Tarsus all over again...' she grumbled. Addy took a shallow breath and let it out slowly, trying to relax. She wasn't going to stay here. She'd boost the transmitter and then -

Addy froze, her hand flying up to the hidden spot behind her ear. Had it come off in the middle of her beating? Had Kodos discovered her plan?

She almost started sobbing in relief when her searching fingers found the thin film. It was her only hope of contacting the outside world again, of going back to her family and the Enterprise. As long as she had this, she had hope, and hope was what she hadn't had enough of the last time. Hope would get her through this.

Confidence renewed, Adelaide let her arm relax, hissing at the sharp grinding feeling in her chest and shoulder that she'd ignored in her moment of panic. Good thing she got a little boost, too, because before her pain had even subsided to a dull throb, a door off to her right opened, flooding the room with light and making her sensitive eyes squint.

"Ah, good, you're awake." Kodos stepped into the room, a tray in his hands. Addy watched him warily as he turned on a light and walked smoothly over to her. He sat by her head, placing the tray gently on the ground. Without inspecting too much, it looked like it had the necessary supplies to give her basic medical attention.

"I'm sorry they were so rough on you, pet, but you've lost all of my good morals. I can't have that. We have to get started right away on reforming you again, for this is much to do in this universe, and simply no time to do it." Addy took a deep, slow breath so she didn't spit in his psychotic, demented face. She hissed once again when Kodos began cleaning the open wounds on her body, and appreciative look in his eyes. She tried to ignore the sick feeling in her stomach.

"Look at you. You've grown up so beautifully, pet. I'm so proud of you."

'Is this guy for real..?'

"Where are we? Have we left yet?" she croaked. Kodos' lips twitched.

"You think I'm that stupid, you filthy whore?" Addy's inside chilled at his tone, soft and full of danger. "You think I don't know that you've got some kind of half-baked plan of escape?"

Addy said nothing. Kodos leaned down until his breath wafted into her face, the familiar smell of oranges instinctively making her shy away from him.

"Get this through your blonde fucking skull, Adelaide. You are MINE. You have been mine since the first moment you talked to me. No prison will keep me from finding you and taking you back. Your body is my vessel to do with whatever I so choose. Your mind is a weapon I will cultivate and aim at my enemies. Forget your life and independence, pet. The only way you will ever escape me is if you take my life with your own two hands. You know this. You have always known this."

By the end, Addy was quivering. His words were so threatening, but his voice had been so gentle, and the contrast between the two was jarring. He wasn't telling her things she hadn't already thought in her darkest moments, buried at the bottom of a bottle. And he knew this. She could see it in the subtle triumph in his eyes, felt it in the way he ran his fingers through her disheveled curls. She didn't realize she was crying until he wiped a tear off her cheek, bringing his finger up to his mouth and suck on it, making obscene noises.

"That's it, pet," he said huskily, "that's what I'm looking for. Let it all go. Catharsis through torment. We can be together again, soon." Addy turned her face away from him, and Kodos went over the tedious task of cleaning her wounds.

When he was finished, her knee was set and in a cast, and her ribs had been wrapped tightly. Kodos pat her on the head one last time before picking up the tray and leaving without another word.

At least he left her the light.

Please leave me some loooooooooooove! You will have my love forever!

Peace.