To start off with- JUSTIN BIEBER GOT ARRESTED! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY I AM!

Second, I owe credit to two or three people, but for the life of me, I've lost track of them- I'M SO SORRY!- if you've recently given me ideas for Alvie's story, can you send me a new PM or shout at me in your review so I can thank you properly?

Also, another highlight of my day- there are these chocolate bars- Mint Aeros, (yum!)- and they have a promotion going at the minute. There's a one in five chance of winning a free chocolate bar and I've won FOUR TIMES! I never win things!

And I've added the one-shots of Percy's 'no boys' rule thing. I'll add more as well… I think…

"That's so not fair!" Sage protested. "The boys have girlfriends and friends that are girls. Why can't I have a friend that's a boy?"

"No boys." Percy replied stubbornly. Sage had been texting at the dinner table and Percy had asked who it was, to which she replied 'Tyler'. Obviously, that was a boy's name and, obviously, Percy didn't approve.

"He's a friend!" Sage argued, looking every bit like her mother when angry, save the green eyes. Percy just looked at her and she knew there was no winning him round this time. She stomped her foot in frustration, called him an idiot in Ancient Greek and stormed from the room. "Stupid over-protective parents…" She grumbled, pointedly stamping up the stairs. Her father had her phone, but thankfully he didn't know the code to unlock it.

She collapsed on her bed. A minute later, Lilly tentatively poked her head around the door.

"Did Dad take your phone too?"

"Yeah, he- wait, too?" Sage sat up. "Let me guess- he found out you had a male friend and confiscated your phone?" Lilly nodded. "Ugh…" Sage groaned, flopping back on her bed. Lilly hesitated before cautiously tip-toeing over. She sat nervously on the end of her sister's bed. The vast majority of their family was male and they were all very protective of the girls.

Sage sulked on her bed while Lilly sat silently, staring at the seemingly endless collection of books around Sage's room.

Annabeth came in to check on them at some point.

"No phones?" They both nodded. "Boys?"

"Friends." Sage stressed. "Why does Dad freak about stuff like that?" Annabeth sighed, walking over and sitting between them.

"It's Percy. Family first. He just doesn't want you two falling for somebody and getting hurt."

"Mom, I'd be more worried about the boy if he tried anything." Annabeth smiled.

"You're so my daughter." She pulled the two into a hug. "I'll talk to him, but you know how stubborn he is."

"Just attack him with a frying pan." Lilly suggested in a voice that was barely audible. Annabeth laughed softly.

"That only works with Tobias, but I'll give it a try." The sisters expected their mother to get up and go and speak to their father, but instead she just lifted her head. "Seaweed Brain!"

"Was he eavesdropping?"

"Yes. Yes I was." Sage fumed and promptly folded her arms, turning her back on both of her parents. "Sage, don't do that."

"I'm allowed friends." Percy sighed and Sage noticed a different tone in that sigh than the one she expected. Not annoyance, but… hurt? Worry?

He doesn't want you hurt, her brain pointed out. He's only doing his job.

Yes, but I don't want to hang around with flipping bitchy Barbie dolls.

Tell him that then.

Fine. I will.

Sage looked back at her father, half-turning to catch his eye properly. Percy's expression was carefully arranged, probably because he knew she would get annoyed if he looked worried for her. Sage could look after herself. Lilly could too if she wasn't so shy.

"Tyler's a friend. Most of my friends are boys," Percy frowned, "but that's only 'cos I'd quite happily kill the girls in my school. They're self-centred, arrogant, selfish cows with a tendency to bleach their hair, paint themselves orange and dress in the most vulgar clothes- if you can call them that- possible." Percy stared at her and then a slow, amused smile eased his features.

"You sound just like your mom." He reached into his pockets and retrieved two iPhone 3GS's. He held them out to his daughters. "Here. Before I change my mind." Lilly and Sage stared at each incredulously before jumping up. They made to take their phones, but Percy held them out of reach. "No boyfriends." He ordered sternly.

"Percy…" Annabeth warned. He clenched his jaw and he almost seemed pained to say the following;

"If… I don't like them… they're out. Gone. Sharpish. Got it?"

"You're going to hate every one, aren't you?" Sage challenged.

"How many are you planning on?" Percy asked, his grip tightening on the phones.

"Well, that depends. How many boyfriends will it take for you to snap?" Sage gave her sweetest smile and Percy stared at her, unsure what to say.

He gave Lilly her phone, but held onto Sage's. Sage glared at him.

"Tyler's number." He said.

"What?" Sage frowned.

"You deleted it from my phone, so I want it back." Annabeth stood and moved to her husband's side, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Stop it."

"Tyler's number or I'll drop it down the toilet." Percy warned.

"Why'd you want Tyler's number?" Sage demanded.

"He hurts you and he's dead."

"Dad." Sage sighed. "He's. A. Friend. Nothing more." Percy didn't look convinced. "Promise." Sage growled through gritted teeth.

"Seaweed Brain, give Sage her phone." Annabeth closed her hands around Percy's, gently prying his fingers away and easing the phone from his grip. He made to protest, but she clamped a hand over his mouth, her stormy grey eyes flashing in warning. She sighed. "Percy, they're growing up. You can't control their lives." He pulled her hand away.

"I can try." He defied.

"Dad, you're an idiot sometimes." Sage rolled her eyes at her father. Lilly cottoned on.

"But we love you." Percy gave a lopsided smile and held his arms out to all three of them.

"Dad, Tyler, Tyler, Dad." Sage watched her best friend and her father carefully. Percy was slowly being worn down by his wife. Sage was allowed male friends, but any boyfriends- they had to go under close inspection and interrogation from Percy until Annabeth saved them.

"Hi, Mr. Jackson." Tyler gave an easy, friendly smiley and extended his hand. He hadn't meet Sage's father face to face- no boys, remember?- and he was as nervous as nervous could be. Percy studied him warily for a few seconds, before briefly grasping his hand. Sage gave a sigh of relief. Her father was as unpredictable as his heritage. "It's… it's nice to meet you. Sage says you're really funny, but a bit weird." Tyler's eyes widened and his smile faltered. "No offense or anything, sir, I just-"

"No, I know I'm weird." Percy glanced at his daughter sceptically. "I didn't know Sage was saying things about me though."

"Nice things." Sage assured. "Mostly."

"Mm-hm." He glanced over his shoulder, catching his wife's eye. She stood in the kitchen doorway while making sure he behaved. "Sage, you know the rules." Sage sighed irritably, but nodded dutifully.

"Rules?" Tyler asked once her father was out of earshot.

"Oh, you know, the usual protective Daddy rules." She started counting off on her fingers, "No boys upstairs; no boys after seven; no going out with boys alone; no boyfriends unless Dad says otherwise; no texting or phoning or talking to boys after eight unless family," She took a breath and continued, "No boys over while Mom and Dad are out unless family; no boys within a three metre distance so you might want to scoot back a bit; no going to a boy's house without permission and I can't be alone with the boy there; no sleepovers with boys; Dad has to have your number," She pulled a face, clearly apologizing, "and he needs addresses as well in case one of you evil male creatures hurts my feelings."

"Your dad will need to be the Flash to get to any boy that upsets you before you."

"See! That's what I told him! But he doesn't listen!"

"I can hear you!"

"Fine! You don't listen unless you're not supposed to!"

"How did you remember all those rules?"

"Dad wrote them down and stuck them on my door and I have to read them every night or he'll cut my book money." Sage grumbled. Tyler snickered, quickly stifling his laughter in his hand at her glower. "So, as long as we don't break any rules, we might have a nice few hours."

"Can I have a copy of those rules?" She smiled lopsidedly.

"I'll see what I can do. Dad really can't spell. Dyslexia." She added at her friend's confused look. "And ADHD. Mom said he had never been as focused as before as he had been when writing the no boys rules."

"Your dad's just looking out for you." Tyler insisted gently.

"I know, but I can take care of myself." She sighed. Tyler looked at her disbelievingly, a cocky smirk twisting his lips. "I can!" Sage protested, clenching her fists. "Oh, you watch it, Tyler."

"Oh god, don't kill me." She grabbed at him, but three years as her best friend had gifted him with the ability to duck out of the way and run for cover. Even if cover was her father.

Percy was no help though, smirking as Sage chased Tyler around downstairs, tackled him and tried to strangle him. That move was very effective with Charlie, the most annoying person ever- Tyler struggled for a minute. He was taller and stronger than she was- not a reason to fight his corner against her- but he didn't feel like dying today.

He tipped her off and scrambled away.

"Tyler!" Tyler turned and stared at her from across the room. She glared at him as he childishly mimicked her by stomping his foot with his fists clenched at his sides and sticking his tongue out. "I'm going to kill you!"

"Sage!" Annabeth grabbed her before she could run to the other side of the room and break her friend. "How about you virtually kill him? Less mess that way."

"Oh, gee, thanks Mrs. Jackson." Tyler said sarcastically. Annabeth fixed her stormy grey eyes on him and he wondered if she would change her mind about cleaning up after her daughter.

Instead, she turned to her daughter, smiling.

"He's sarcastic. I like him already."

"Annabeth!" Percy protested from the kitchen.

"How many kids do you know that can match wits with Sage?" Annabeth argued back instantly.

"That's beside the point!" Annabeth stomped back into the kitchen.

"Match wits with?" Tyler repeated. "Oh, please. You've got serious catching up to do if you want to match wits with yours truly." He grinned lopsidedly at her.

"I'll kill you."

"See! That's all you ever say. I'll kill you, Tyler." He said in a cruel imitation of her, stomping his foot again and scrunching his face up the way she did when she was going to break somebody. "Damn you, Tyler, you're such an idiot! I'll have you know, I'm an amazing person with a sparkling personality."

"Sparkling? Dude, you sound like Twilight."

"Hey! Offensive taken! Lots of offensive taken! I AM NOT A SPARKLY CORPSE!" Sage laughed triumphantly, hands on her hips. Tyler glowered at her. "Fine then. If I'm… whatshisname, you're whatsherface."

"Try and insult me with things that you actually know." He gained a devious smile, pressing his fingertips together in his signature move of 'I have a dastardly plan and you're my victim. Enjoy.'

"Mmmm, gurl, I know things 'bout you even you don't know!" He mustered as much sass as he could and he could see she was trying not laugh. "So, gurl, don't you even go there!"

"Shut up."

"Again," He said in his normal voice, "For someone so smart, you should have more comebacks."

"I don't need comebacks. I can just kick your ass."

"Virtually kick my ass then!" He defied, spreading his hands.

"I will!" She motioned for him to sit on the sofa and set about organising the PS3 and upload the latest Call of Duty game.

"Hey, your brother's online. The Tobster?"

"Oh gods, not him."

"And Maximus."

"Why do you do this to me?" Tyler laughed triumphantly as she sat next to him. Her control was grey with owl and trident stickers all over it. His control was simply black.

"How come you get the nice one? Share!"

"No! I decorated this myself!" She held it out of his reach. He made to lean over her and get it, like he usually did when she held something out of his reach, but then he remembered her father's rules. Instead of getting what he wanted, he shifted away to the other end of the sofa. Sage rolled her eyes at him, loading the game and inviting her two brothers- if she didn't, Tobias would get upset.

"Hey, it's Lil Miss Spicy!"

"You haven't had your ADHD stuff, have you?"

"I thought you didn't ask stupid questions."

"Oooh, snap." Max snickered.

"I can't hear them." Tyler whined.

"Who's that?"

"Tyler."

"Dad let a boy over?"

"Mm-hm." Both of them gave shocked gasps and she could visualise their idiotic expressions.

"I can't hear them!" Tyler complained again, bouncing in his seat like a frustrated child. He looked at her pleadingly.

"I just got comfortable." She grumbled. "Right, see there? That's another set of headphones. Leo's set it up so two people can talk at the same time."

"Awesome!" He jumped up and, following her simplified instructions, connected his set of Turtle-Beaches and could suddenly talk to her brothers. "Hi!"

"He's definitely a boy." Tobias said.

"Dad's losing it." Max agreed.

"I can hear you now!"

"We know." They said together.

"Are they twins?"

"No, but they could be sometimes." Sage pressed play.

"I wasn't ready!" Tobias protested instantly. "Soph! I need cookies!"

"No!" Sophia shouted from the background.

"PLEASE!" Tobias begged. Sophia refused and Tobias eventually gave up, focusing on the game and occasionally grumbling about how he was hungry and needed blue cookies.

"Hold on, blue cookies?"

"Sage, why have you not explained blue food to him yet?"

"He didn't ask."

"I did! Just now!" Sage muttered a curse and explained to her friend about the blue food addiction that was being passed down through the generations. "I want blue food now!"

"Yeah, I like him."

"Dad has good taste."

"Changed your tune a bit quick there, guys." Sage mumbled, shooting the head of a zombie. There was a strangled cry from Tobias.

"You're kill-stealing again!"

"Am not!"

"Do you always argue?"

"Yup." They replied together. Tyler stared at Sage for a second, before shrugging it off and joining the game.

Tyler left at half six that evening, having stayed for dinner.

Sage could have killed him.

Tyler didn't seem to understand basic English- such as 'shut up'.

But he had made Percy laugh and that had to be good. And Tyler had kept the triplets quiet, which was an impossible feat on its own. Only the mentally deranged or suicidal tried to keep those three quiet, especially Callum. That kid was far off his rocker and teetering on the edge of one about six thousand and thirty two down the line.

"Ooh, Sing Star! Let's do it!"

"You can't sing."

"I can too!" He insisted. He gave Theo one of the microphones, who hastily passed it onto his brother. "That one! No, wait…" He scrolled through the songs, muttering to himself at each one that passed. Callum and Theo kept pushing the microphone into each other's hand, clearly not wanting to sing. This was Lilly's game. It was a girl's game. "You have a lot of Pink songs on here."

"That's Lilly."

"You sing?" Lilly's cheeks faded pink.

"No." She squeaked.

"You do too!" Tyler grabbed the microphone from the two brothers and shoved it into her hands. "Come on, I'll sing with you."

"Oh gods, please don't sing." Sage pressed her fingertips to her temples, her elbows on her knees.

"I can sing nicely when I try." He told her, miffed. "You can't." She glared at him, but he had turned back to the game. "Oh! This one!"

"No!" Lilly had gone bright red by this point and was shaking her head.

"Oh, but I know this one…" Tyler pleaded, throwing her The Pleading Look. Lilly backed up a few paces.

"Tyler, it's nearly half six. Your mom will be here soon."

"No fair! We're doing Sing Star next time." He told Lilly, who looked ready to faint. Percy had only gotten her the game after hearing her singing to herself and dancing around the room. She could protest all she wanted- she could sing when she wanted to.

After her friend had left, Sage turned to her father.

"So…?" She questioned carefully.

"He's a good friend." Percy replied, smiling at her despair.

"What have I been telling you for three years?!"

Woo! Is this OK?